Forever

by Rachel Maldonado

  “Well, if it isn't Meghan Jeffries. What brings you here?” she asked. She was almost angry. It wasn't the reaction that Meghan had wanted.

  “I was hoping we could talk. I have something to say to you, and I'm not leaving here until I say it.”

  “You always were a stubborn mule, weren't you?” asked Alex. “Whatever it is you're selling, we don't want any.” She went inside the house and the screen door slammed shut.

  Meghan, refusing to take that as a goodbye, followed Alex inside the home. “Your mama was kind enough to make me some lemonade, and I was nice enough to sit here and wait for you to get home, so the least you can do is listen to me.”

  “After twenty years, you finally show your face here, Meghan? I sent you thousands of dollars of flowers and bears and gifts, and you never once wrote back to me! I loved you damn it, and you left me for dead in the hospital!”

  The tears began to pour down Meghan's face. “That's why I'm here, Alex. I didn't know. I swear to God, I didn't know! Joanna said those gifts were from her, and I believed her! She took the notes and threw them away. How was I to know?”

  “You should've known because I loved you! Why didn't you look for me? Why didn't you try to find out what happened to me? I didn't have a cellphone. It broke when I fell two stories onto the rocks below! I didn't know your number. I had no way of even reaching you because I couldn't walk, and I could barely say two words!”

  Meghan sobbed so hard that she fell to the floor on her knees. She clutched her stomach with her hands. “I loved you, Alex Hunter!” she shouted through her tears. “I never stopped loving you! I thought you stopped caring about me, stopped loving me. I swear to God I didn't know the notes and flowers were from you. Joanna must've switched the notes out and signed her name!” Meghan's heart was clearly breaking and shattering into a million pieces right before Alex's eyes. It was consuming her like a fire that had burned too long to extinguish.

  Alex knew Meghan was being sincere in what she was telling her, then all of a sudden, the look on Alex's face changed. She was no longer angry. She could see the pain of finally knowing the truth in Meghan's face and hear her sorrow in her trembling voice as she sobbed. She suddenly remembered the woman. Joanna. She had been the woman that had taken Meghan star gazing. The one Meghan had never taken an interest in. “You're telling me the truth, aren't you? You really didn't know those gifts were from me? And you didn't know I was in the hospital?”

  Meghan still had tears flowing down her cheeks. “I swear it on my love for you. I swear I didn't know.”

  “Joanna? She did that to us? Where is she?” asked Alex. She could feel her temper starting to rise again like the red mercury in a thermometer. She was about to blow the glass top off any minute now as her anger shifted from Meghan to Jo. She'd never been much of a fighter, but she could feel her blood boiling. She began pacing back and forth and rolling up her sleeves. She was ready to sock Jo right in the middle of her big, ugly face.

  “She's dead,” said Meghan. “She drank herself to death. I just left the hospital today. Telling me about your flowers and gifts and what she did to sabotage us were her dying words. She finally fessed up the truth.”

  Meghan continued to sob as Alex held her in her arms. “I'm so sorry.”

  Alex began to cry. She squeezed Meghan tightly in her arms as if she never wanted to let her go. She felt somehow as if she held onto her and held her closely that they could somehow go back in time, back to when things fell apart. She wanted so desperately to erase all the years she spent pining over Meghan, her one true love, and change the outcome of her life. She had held her loss and grief in for so long that it was all bottled up tight. Now, after so many years of holding her feelings inside, they finally burst out like a cork off a champagne bottle and came spilling out. She finally allowed her tears to come out, and they both sobbed in each other's arms.

  “I never stopped loving you,” said Alex softly as she cried. “But when you never came to find me, I thought you couldn't handle what had happened to me. I thought you didn't love me. Sheryl was good to me and took care of me. After a couple of years, I married her. I'm married now, Meghan.”

  “I know,” said Meghan through her tears. “There's something else.”

  “What more could there be?”

  “I'm two months pregnant.”

  “Geezus. At least I know it's not mine,” said Alex trying to lighten the mood. She chuckled for a moment, then kissed Meghan on the forehead.

  Alex's mama walked into the room with a dust rag and found Alex and Meghan on the floor still holding onto one another. “What in Carnation Instant Breakfast is going on in here? Never mind, I don't wanna know.”

  Both Alex and Meghan started to laugh. “It's not what you think, mama. I'm headed back to the hospital.”

  “I said I don't wanna know,” said mama on her way back into the kitchen.

  Alex laughed once again. She paused for a moment, inhaling the scent of Meghan's skin. She still smelled the same, like roses in the spring time.

  “I have an idea,” said Alex after some thought. “You can say no if you want to, but it might benefit us all if you said yes.”

  “Oh Lord, here comes one of your ideas. What is it?”

  “How about you move in here with us. Mama's gotta get back home. She doesn't like to leave her house unattended. She thinks it will get robbed or vandalized, and I know she won't ever sell it. It's been in the family for generations. You can help out with chores, and when the time comes, I can help you with the baby.”

  “That's ridiculous. What would your wife think? She's not going to want another woman around here, especially me.”

  “She doesn't know what you look like. And it's not like there's going to be any funny business happening anyway. You might be single, but I'm still married,” said Alex holding up her finger displaying her wedding band. “It will be just until you can have your baby and get back on your feet again now that Jo's gone.”

  The thought of being in this house with Alex excited and delighted her. It was what she always wanted, always dreamed of. But it would never be their place. She would be nothing more than a third wheel and a nursemaid to Sheryl until she could get back on her feet.

  “What am I going to do when the baby comes and your wife is able to walk again?” asked Meghan curiously. She would never be able to afford to live on her own with a baby. She would have to work, pay for daycare, find a smaller place after selling the house she shared with Joanna. It all seemed like so much, and yet, Alex had an answer. She always had an answer and made everything seem so easy.

  Alex shook her head. “My wife is never going to walk again. She wasn't as fortunate as I was.” The tears streamed down Alex's cheeks. “With all the years she helped others, you would think that God would heal her and help her walk again, but He won't. The doctor said she will never walk again.” She wiped the tears from her eyes and tried to regain her composure. “But you see, Meghan, with you living here and not paying rent, you would have extra money for the baby.” Alex was still working, and her wife would be getting disability. The extra income would be beneficial to everyone in the household.

  “Run the idea by your wife first,” offered Meghan. “I have to go take care of the funeral arrangements and figure out how to sell the house. I can live off of that for a while. In a few months, I'm going to take off for maternity leave. I'll need the extra money.”

  “I'm going to go by the hospital to see Sheryl, but I'll tell her that I hired a live in helper named Meg. I doubt after twenty years that it will even cross her mind to think that it might be you, but you're Meg anyway instead of Meghan.” She picked herself up off the floor and held her hand out to help Meghan up.

  They both parted ways, Meghan went to the funeral home while Alex went back to the hospital to talk to her wife. As soon as Meghan got the chance, she penned Willie another short letter on a postcard and dropped it in the mailbox. The letter read as follows:

  De
ar Willie,

  My wife Joanna passed away. The drink finally took her from me.

  Wondering if and when you'll ever be coming home.

  All my love,

  Your friend,

  Meghan.

  Meghan had felt that the years had been unkind to her, often when Willie wanted to video chat, she had refused. She preferred instead to write letters, but even those had become few and far between. She just didn't have much to share anymore. She didn't want to burden Willie with her unhappy home life.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Meghan made the funeral arrangements and chose to have Joanna's body cremated. It was a small funeral, and only people that she knew from work attended. Sadly, they'd never made any friends. Jo had always been too jealous and insecure to allow Meghan to talk to other women, so she had suffered in silence not always wanting to talk about her situation to anyone, not even Willie.

  Meghan also sold their house as soon as she could. She couldn't stand to be in that house any longer than she had to. Now that she realized her entire marriage was a sham and was based entirely on a lie, she had a sour taste in her mouth when she was in the house.

  Alex talked to Sheryl and with the aid of the hospital staff convinced Sheryl that having a live-in home care worker was a good idea, so without much opposition from Sheryl, Meghan took as many clothes and things she could pack into her car and moved into Alex and Sheryl's country farmhouse on the lake. She had her own room and her own bed. She settled in quietly one day. The room didn't have any paintings or much décor. All it had was a dresser with a large mirror, a bed, and a window that overlooked the lake, but Meghan appreciated Alex's hospitality. It was so good of her to take her in. She began unpacking her belongings and placing them in the dresser. As she did so, she stopped to look out dreamily at the lake. She smiled as she recalled how she and Alex had gone skinny dipping there so long ago.

  Staring out at that lake, she felt goosebumps down her arms and neck. For a brief instant, it felt as if the time hadn't passed and at any moment she would see a young Alex run down the bank of the river and leap into the water, then plead with her to jump in after her. She giggled to herself at the thought, then felt her smile fade as she glanced in the mirror to see that the years had aged her. She was only forty but yet she had started to get streaks of gray in her hair, and her face had grown many worry lines. She refused to think of them as wrinkles. To Meghan, they were caused by the many nights she spent worrying about Jo and whether Jo was okay, drunk driving, passed out somewhere in a ditch, or in jail.

  Meghan finished unpacking, then as soon as she could, she wrote to Willie explaining that she had sold the house and what her new address was. She didn't tell her that she was now living with Alex. She feared Willie would judge her for moving in with Alex when she was still married to Sheryl.

  During the day, Meghan cleaned and cooked and tended to Sheryl's needs. She helped her brush her teeth, comb her hair, take a shower, and use the bathroom. Even when Meghan was nearly ready to give birth, she was still helping Sheryl get around. She didn't let her pregnancy slow her down although she felt as if she was running to the bathroom every ten minutes.

  In the afternoons after lunch, Meghan liked to wheel Sheryl out onto the porch to enjoy the sunshine. She often told Sheryl stories about her childhood and stories about Willie and how crazy she was growing up. She wasn't sure if Sheryl was even listening to her most times.

  “Do you have any names picked out for your baby?” asked Sheryl out of the blue. Meghan was surprised to hear her voice. She hadn't said more than a few words to anyone since she had been discharged from the hospital almost a year ago. She had grown depressed and barely talked to anyone at all including Meghan and Alex.

  Meghan was glad to finally hear her speak. “If it's a boy, I want to call him Aleghan. If it's a girl Aleghany.”

  “That's an unusual name,” commented Sheryl, but she never asked for an explanation and Meghan was glad. She wouldn't know how to explain it. She hadn't thought of a reason to explain away the name. All she knew was the truth, and she hadn't told Alex of the name. She thought that Alex would surely cry if she told her. In a way, it would be their baby. They would raise him or her together. Her baby would have three parents. Even though Jo was no longer with her to be a part of the parenting, Meghan figured that it was probably for the best. Jo's drinking and smoking would've been a bad influence. She didn't figure that the baby would've changed her, and she would've hated for her baby to grow up around that type of drunken behavior and second hand smoke-filled environment.

  As the time passed, Sheryl started to suspect that something was unusual about the relationship Alex had with her caregiver. They spent many nights talking late into the night. She could often hear their laughter coming in from the porch. The sounds of their voices and laughter carried into the breeze and into the windows as she slept. She could sense that Alex was growing fond of Meg, but knew Alex would never cheat on her. Alex was a good person and a good wife. She may not have been wealthy or had much to offer when they were married but there were two things that she was for certain. She was romantic, and she was loyal.

  On a cold winter night while Alex was working a night shift, Meghan's water finally broke. She woke up in a pool of water.

  “Sheryl!” she shouted. “I'm headed to the hospital. Looks like I have to drive myself!”

  “Good Lord! I'll call Alex at work!” As much as Sheryl would've loved to be there for the birth of the baby, she found it hard to get around in her wheel chair. She waited at home patiently while Alex went to the hospital to be with Meghan for the birth of her child.

  “Push!” shouted the doctor in the delivery room.

  Meghan pushed as hard as she could and nearly broke Alex's hand as she crushed it in hers. Alex screamed, “Ahhhh!” Just as Meghan also screamed with another forceful push! “Ahhhh!” they both wailed in unison. Alex from the pain in her hand and Meghan from the pain of delivery. But finally, after only three hours of labor pains, breathing, and pushing, her new baby came into the world with a loud shriek.

  Meghan finally released Alex's hand and rested her head on the pillow. She was covered with sweat and her hair was in disarray, but she had a smile upon her face.

  “Looks like you and I weren't the only ones screaming,” said Alex grinning as she watched the nursing staff clean up their bundle of joy.

  Meghan reached out to hold Alex's hand in hers. Alex winced and Meghan giggled. “I'm sorry I squashed your hand. Don't be a baby. It's not like you had something the size of a watermelon come out of your cooch.”

  One of the nurses giggled at Meghan's comment, and Alex felt her face become heated with embarrassment.

  “Here's your baby,” said a nurse, handing Meghan her baby girl.

  Meghan held her tightly. “Welcome to the world sweet baby, Aleghany,” she whispered. Alex couldn't be more proud. She had stayed by Meghan's side the entire time she was in labor and even ran down to the gift store and bought a giant stuffed teddy bear to welcome the baby.

  Alex hadn't been gone for more than fifteen minutes and Meghan had wondered where she had gone. As it turns out, she had bought a case of pink chewing gum that was in the shape of cigars that said, 'It's a girl!' and was handing them out to everyone in the hospital.

  A few of the nurses came in chuckling. “I've never seen anyone so excited before,” said a nurse. “You're lucky she loves you and the baby so much. I'm sure she'll be a good parent.”

  Meghan smiled. She thought so, too. She had always thought Alex would be good with her kids. She had thought they would have a family together. It was much later in life than she had anticipated, but nevertheless, she would still take part in raising her daughter.

  “I love her name,” said Alex with tears in her eyes as she stood beside the hospital bed. “She's so beautiful. She looks just like you. She has your gorgeous eyes and your dark hair.” Aleghany had rings of curls falling around her forehead. “Can I hold h
er?”

  “Of course,” replied Meghan.

  Alex felt her heart warm as she took the baby in her arms. She felt the hot tears of joy stream down her face. “I love you,” she said aloud as she rocked Aleghany.

  Meghan wasn't entirely sure that what she said was meant for her or the baby, so she chose instead to not respond. She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.

  Chapter Twenty

  As soon as Meghan was discharged from the hospital, she drove home with the baby while Alex followed her in her pick-up truck making sure she got home okay.

  “Now that the baby's here I can look for a place of my own,” suggested Meghan as she and Alex sat down on the sofa beside Sheryl.

  “Bring that baby here,” said Sheryl with open arms. She took one look at Aleghany and fell in love. “I don't think you will need to be moving out anytime soon. You're going to need help with the baby changing, rocking, burping, feeding. Alex and I would love to have you stay on. We can help.”

  “Are you sure?” asked Meghan.

  “We're sure. We both want you to stay,” offered Alex.

  As soon as Meghan got the chance, she penned a letter to Willie to tell her of the birth of her baby and inserted a photograph of Aleghany. She handed the envelope to Alex as she sat on the sofa with Aleghany in her arms. She had wanted to keep it a secret until she knew for sure she could conceive, but even after she found out she was pregnant, she hadn't wanted to jinx her pregnancy by writing to Willie. She thought if she told her that surely something would go wrong and she would miscarry, then she would be forced to write a painful letter to tell Willie what had occurred. Instead, she waited until Aleghany was born a healthy six pounds and five ounces and was safely at home to write to Willie to tell her of her news.