The Duke Who Loved Me

by Rachelle Stevensen

  It was difficult, but she also sold everything of her mother’s wardrobe. She couldn’t use it, and while it broke her heart, it needed to be done. They had to sell almost all of her mother’s jewelry, save a few precious pieces, that though not worth a lot to others, meant the world to Rhiannon.

  She sold the paintings, the priceless heirlooms, everything they didn’t need to survive and it still wasn’t enough.

  They had finally paid the last of her father’s bills, but barely had enough to feed the four of them who lived there. And that was the hardest thing, not being able to have enough money to live, to get by. If they had, Rhia would have loved to stay in the house she grew up in, had loved, and hated. But it wasn’t meant to be.

  So at the end of that dreadful year, Rhiannon made the decision to move to Scotland. She wanted to see where her grandmother was buried and live in the house, they were happiest in.

  She was grateful she had the small cottage and that it had been left to her in her grandmother's will.

  She hoped her story and the legacy of her name would die when she left London. Every time she left the house, she would hear whispers of her parents and how they died and how sad they were for the poor crippled girl.

  Many times, she wanted to turn and tell people to go away. To find some other thing to occupy themselves, but she knew her mother would be appalled if she ever spoke to anyone that way, so she held her tongue.

  She was strong, she had learned to walk again, with Julia’s help, and had taken over the household for her father. Had done the hard things, the best way a girl her age, with her leg the way it was, could.

  Had paid all their debts by selling practically everything she had ever owned, but she didn’t let that break her spirit. She needed to be strong, to figure out the rest of her life and to make it to Scotland.

  To see her grandmother’s grave, to live in her small cottage and to breathe a sigh of relief that she was getting a change in her life. To get away from the memories that plagued her.

  To finally see and do something else. Anything else that didn’t remind her constantly of her parents, their deaths, and her life struggles. She needed to do this for herself. She could do hard things. She did them every day.

  Just waking up sometimes was difficult, knowing she was all alone in the world. That she didn’t really have much future here in England. It broke her heart to have to leave, it felt as if she was abandoning her family legacy.

  But her legacy had died in the accident. With her mother and father. And, it hurt Rhia to no end. She struggled hard with the decision to move, and leave what she knew behind, but there was no help for it.

  She didn’t want to live in the townhome that was too big for her alone. She didn’t want to stay and hear the pity in people’s voices, or for one more person to come demanding money.

  She knew it wasn’t practical to live in such a large home, where only five people lived. It was too much space.

  Rhia had shut down the house all the way, except for her room, the kitchen and one small drawing room. And, she just knew that another family would be able to make their memories here.

  It was a beautiful home, and her father’s solicitor had been kind enough to help her sell it.

  Most of the money paid off the rest of her father’s debts, and she had some left to help start her new life in Scotland. She was grateful for that small bit of money, knowing it would keep her going for quite a while.

  She just needed to finally get out of London. To leave the city behind, to meet new people, and who knew? Maybe she might even meet a kind gentleman who needed a wife, someone who didn’t mind her limp, or someone to help with children?

  She hoped that would be what she found in her new home. She was grateful for the family that had served as her second family since they started working for hers. She loved them dearly.

  She could do many things for herself, but the dear sweet family that had served her parents, as well as her, would have to stay.

  The Browns’ were the best people to have helped raise Rhia.

  She would always be eternally grateful and miss them terribly.

  Especially Julia. With everything Julia had done for Rhia, before and after the accident, Rhia couldn’t have possessed a better friend.

  Julia was always there, through thick and thin. They grew up together, Julia was taught to read and write alongside Rhiannon and in turn, Rhiannon learned to cook, clean, ride a horse better than most men, and other interesting things.

  Julia’s parents, Irene and Henry Brown were as close to Rhiannon as her own parents were.

  Before her parents died, their house was a happy one, filled with love and laughter.

  Rhia remembered the amazing times they had and she would miss everything. But, she could not stay. Couldn’t live her life with the worry of every bill, every single cent needed to supply their large house. She knew it was important to see that. That she couldn’t be selfish even if she was scared.

  The Browns were very nervous about this, and tried to help plan her journey.

  Rhiannon didn’t want to go the normal way; she didn’t want to face the scene of the accident. It would be horrible to her to see the sight that had stolen every hope, dream and plan.

  She had wanted to see Isaac and his family, but the memories were to raw. Too painful. She had kept in contact with him, sending letters to him and receiving them in return, but she couldn't face him, or the scene of the accident that changed her entire life.

  She was a strong person, but she wasn't that strong. She couldn't do it by herself.

  So, she planned an entirely new route. And she would finally move on from this. From the memories and nightmares. From her pain.

  She had packed everything into two rather small bags, a few of her favorite books, her mother’s special jewelry, the miniature of her parents and the only clothing she had left.

  A few day dresses in modest colors and a thin cloak, plus a thicker one for winter.

  Since it was already getting colder, Rhia chose to keep the thick cloak out and placed the few coins she had into a hidden part of her bag.

  Then it was time for her to leave. Leave the warmth of her home, the friends she had known her entire life, her parent’s legacy, their graves, her sense of security.

  The Browns were going to stay a few more weeks to close down the house, sell the rest of the furniture, and make sure that everything would be ready for the new family when they moved in.

  Julia had found a position as a governess in a home in Mayfair, thanks to her schooling, and started after Rhia left.

  Rhiannon looked around the sad little room that had been hers since infancy.

  She felt a few tears slip free knowing that she would never see this room, this house ever again.

  The house of life, laughter, and a happy family. The house of darkness, despair, hurt, loneliness and hardship.

  She shut her eyes to drown out the thoughts, and closed the door behind her.

  She walked down the stairs to the kitchen, ready to say goodbye to the very best family she had ever known.

  Julia was there first when she walked through the door, and pulled Rhiannon into an embrace. “You be careful out there on your own. Remember what my father taught us if you get into trouble.”

  Rhiannon smiled through her tears. “I will be careful, I will get there in three or four days, depending on the weather. I will write as soon as I can. You take care of yourself, and your new charges. Good luck Julia girl.”

  Julia released her from the hug and stepped back, allowing Irene to swallow her up in a motherly embrace. “You dear sweet girl. Please don’t do this. We can figure things out you know. You are not a burden here.”

  Rhia sighed, “I know I am not Irene. It just feels that way. We would have to fight and work so hard just to keep this house that holds mainly sad and hurtful memories. I can't do that. Not to you or to myself any longer. We both know it is time to move on. It has been difficult here with us
trying to maintain what we could of the home, but it is too big for us, plus, you and Henry need a new start somewhere else. I will be fine, I promise.”

  Irene squeezed her tightly and let go. Then Henry was there, and he hugged her too. “You are the finest girl in the entire city of London, besides my dear Julia, please write to us often, and know you will be missed beyond words.”

  Rhiannon sniffled and tried very hard not to cry. She pulled her handkerchief out of her pocket and dabbed at her wet eyes. “I will write to you every day I possibly can, sweet Henry. Take care of your wife. Thank you for everything you wonderful people have done for me.”

  The Browns all hugged her together, then Rhia grabbed her bags, and without a backwards glance, walked out the door to get on a hack that would take her to the stagecoach.

  She couldn’t let them see how much this affected her. How badly it hurt to walk away. How hard this was going to be, to never come back this way again. She made it to the hackney before the tears fell.

  Chapter Four

  Aidan

  Northumberland, England Sept, 1812

  Aidan walked around the stables, checking on what needed to be done that day. There were stalls that needed to be mucked, horses needed to be exercised and more.

  So, he rolled up his sleeves, and got to work. It always helped clear his mind of any bad thoughts when he was working, and he knew today would be no different. He was glad for it.

  John was always grateful for the help and between the two of them, they managed to get a lot accomplished.

  Aidan’s thoughts were of his sisters, their requests and his brother. He always worried about Cole when he was in London, but he knew someone had to represent their family, and it certainly wouldn’t be him.

  When it came time for the midday meal, he brushed off his pants, put his waistcoat back on, and made his way to the dining room.

  His mother liked to have a meal together, usually at dinner, but whenever they could, they would eat lunch together as well.

  He loved hearing about how much his sisters were learning, how well Cole was doing in London, and how his mother faired.

  He quickened his stride and walked through the front door just as it opened for him.

  Mr. Peabody was always efficient and Aidan truly felt like the stooped old man needed a raise, or less work, but the man took neither.

  He had looked after Aidan, and his mother before him and would out of pure stubbornness, stick around until Cole or possibly one of the twins had a child.

  “Thank you, Mr. Peabody.”

  Mr. Peabody nodded, “You are quite welcome your grace. You have some correspondence from London, would you like me to bring it to you in the dining room?”

  Aidan nodded and walked past. “Yes, that would be fine. Thank you.” He knew that the man would have brought everything anyway, but Aidan chuckled to himself that he made the requests that would happen regardless.

  Aidan went to the dining room, and there sat his mother, and his two sisters. His sisters were only eighteen, but every day they grew more beautiful.

  They were happy and full of life. They hadn’t been subjected to their father’s rage, because Aidan would not let that happen. They were precious to him. His twin sisters had to be some of the best women he had ever met. They were not identical, as Cole and himself also were not, but they had similar coloring and build.

  Rose, the older of the two had blonde hair that was streaked with red. Her hair was like sunshine almost. She had green eyes and was the taller of the two, though she still only came up to Aidan’s shoulder.

  She was excellent at playing the piano and had a marvelous singing voice. Which she quite often loved to demonstrate. She did not like to paint, or do embroidery, and was a lot like Aidan. She was quite shy, but could be sharp and fierce when she needed to be.

  Lily had blonde hair also, without the red mixed in. She had grey eyes, that were similar to Cole's. She was shorter than Rose by an inch or two, but Rose never let her forget it.

  Lily loved to paint, was a talented artist in watercolors, coal art, portraits, and embroidery. She excelled in anything artistic. She could play the piano, but was loathe to do so in front of anyone. And she was also quite outspoken and not afraid to express her feelings. She wasn't shy in the least.

  He smiled when they looked up from their lunch and they both jumped up from their seats and ran to greet him.

  Rose got to him first and hugged him fiercely. “Aidan, I was wondering if you could go to the village today and get a new book of songs for the piano. I long for new songs to play.”

  Aidan laughed, “Of course you do. After I get finished with the things I need to do, I will go to the village, unless it is too rainy. Then no one will be going.”

  Rose nodded and sat back down. Lily came up next, hugging him as well. “Since you are going to the village, can I put in a new order for more red and white paint? I seem to go through those colors more than others.”

  Aidan nodded again and squeezed his sister tight. “That would be fine.”

  Lily smiled up at him and sat back down as well. He went to where his mother sat and kissed her cheek. “Is there something you need from the village?”

  His mother laughed, “Not at the moment. Thank you though.”

  Aidan laughed and sat down at the head of the table. It wasn’t his favorite place to sit, but his mother demanded few things of him as a Lord of the Realm and this was one of them.

  A footman came in with a tray of lunch for him, that also held a letter from Cole.

  Aidan opened the letter which said,

  Aidan,

  I am writing this letter to tell you a few things, and I'm praying it gets to you in time. First off, I hope all is well at home. All is well here. I miss the girls and mother terribly. Life is so quiet here in my rather large and unappealing home, it is boring. Some days I long for the noise. The distractions that await us every day. How different life is there, compared to here. Even my daily practice with my swords has not occupied me the way it once has. Really, Aidan, you should give it a try. I guarantee you would be begging to be back in the country and away from all of this. Sorry, rambling. I get a little carried away. I should ask how things are there, but I am certain that you would tell me that all is fine and well, the horses are good, our sisters are beautiful, our mother has found a new way to mix this herb with that herb that will help with such and such, and things of that nature, so I shall simply come back soon so I may see all of this for myself. Please tell Lily that there is a proficient painter here in London who is just brilliant in his art. I hope to show her someday. Also tell Rose that for her, I went to a musicale so I could tell her what was being performed. Let her know that I almost died from boredom, my ears hurt rather badly after a certain girl got up to sing and play, -she was not good- and I also had at least 7 matchmaking mamas trying to get me to look at their daughters as potential wives. Lord save me from the matchmaking mothers. I see how the girls really act when they think they are out of earshot and I have to stop myself from lashing out at them. They are all so hateful and petty and hearing their claims on men, including myself, I am quite shocked. I have been engaged to several different women, all of whom I have never spoken to. At least according to them. Hearing my name linked with these women is news to me. I had no idea I had been engaged so often. I'm quite a cad. Apparently, I am quite the catch of the season because of my bedding prowess. I had no clue. Neither do they, or anyone, but it is laughable to hear these things spoken about me. It turns out I am dangerous, quiet and rather scary to most women, and a few men. Who knew? I just haven’t found people to speak to here. Aside from my very few acquaintances, I am alone. It is just as father used to describe. It is so hard to find someone to speak with that isn’t interested in anything more than just talking. So, I keep to myself mostly. I did have a good friend I would go to functions with before he got his commission and went to war. He was a naval captain and just recently returned home beca
use he was severely injured. I went to visit with him a few days ago, and I pray for his recovery. I did not go to many balls for the season. I was invited to a few, but since I do not dance with anyone, or hardly talk to anyone for that matter, I am not invited to too many functions. I find that most of the people of the ton are too much like father and I have no desire to be around them. I know I should go to most functions as I am acting in your stead, but you wouldn’t even go to some of these blasted things, so I do not feel as badly for not attending. Aidan, I wish you would come and see this. Just once. See what I do for you brother. Enjoy the peace and quiet for now, I shall be home before you know it. And I know for a fact, it won’t be quiet. I forgot to tell you first thing, but I am remedying it now. I ran into our Aunt and unfortunately, she has decided that she and Katarina will be coming for a visit. They want to host a ball to celebrate Katarina’s engagement. I have no idea who she is betrothed to, but I feel awful for the poor man. He will be miserable his entire life. So, we need to prepare for the worst few weeks. I am hoping it is not someone I know, because we all know the kind of woman she is. But I shall tell you more when I arrive. I know I should have sent a missive as soon as I found out, but I honestly thought they wouldn’t go through with it, I apologize for my delay in sending this out. They may already be there demanding the ball be held. Good Luck, I shall be there as soon as I am able.

  All the best,

  Cole

  * * *

  Aidan grimaced, knowing the letter had come too late. His aunt and Katarina had shown up yesterday morning unannounced and most definitely not expected. Aidan struggled hourly with how much he hated this interruption, how he hated that they assumed they would be welcome, that their many guests would be allowed to stay for the weekend.

  Aidan knew this wasn’t typical behavior. As it was socially unacceptable to host something at another's home without their consent, but Koryn hadn’t cared in the least. She just told them the ball would be held, and that there wasn’t really anything they could do about it.