Love Is Oxygen
Page 4
Does this wreck your mind in the way it does mine? God, the creator of the universe, is the definition of love itself—and he showed this by sacrificing his one and only Son. Mind blowing, if you ask me. Our love for God cannot compare to the love he has for us. We cannot outlove him, outforgive him, or outsmart him. He’s just that incredible. God foresaw all the ugly pieces of our lives and still chose to send his Son to die for us. He loved us enough to offer us rescue.
Love is the very reason Jesus’ body was brutally broken upon that splintered cross. It’s unbeatable, unrestricted, and hands down the greatest attribute of Jesus. God’s love will transform the way you see life, and it will radically invade the way you see others. God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit are the definition of love itself.
God Isn’t a Bully
Growing up, I didn’t understand this about God’s love. Instead, I pictured God as a guardian of good who was always looking to strike me down if I messed up or did something that made him mad. Sadly, I got this version of God from countless sermons by pastors who relied on scare tactics to get their points across. And I was brought face-to-face with this mentality when my aunt took me to my first Christian music festival. Although I was still a little skeptical about God and the whole idea of faith, I was excited about this concert I’d heard about. We pulled up to a baseball stadium where almost forty thousand Christians and non-Christians alike would be taking time to worship, listen to a message, and pray together. I was blown away by the idea. But my excitement and curiosity were quickly dampened by the sight of men, women, and children standing on buckets and yelling at people. As we walked by the growing crowd, some called us “disgusting sinners” while others raised a chant of “Repent and be saved!” The hope of Jesus, which I desperately needed, was lost amid hellfire and brimstone. And this happens way too often.
Now that I understand the love of God, which permeates Scripture and has overtaken my life, I wonder why so many people illustrate God in this way. Does the Bible talk about God’s wrath? Yes. But does this mean God is nothing but wrathful, seeking to destroy anything and everything in his way? Nope. Not even close. Never once in my studies have I seen God best represented through shouting and judgment. I can assume this happens because people miss that he’s a loving and caring Father. God isn’t out to get us, nor is he relentlessly searching for a reason to condemn. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that the last thing he would ever want to do is punish or condemn those he loves. Rather, because he loves us, he doesn’t want us to stay in lives that keep us away from him. He has to direct us in the ways of righteousness and truth as according to his Word, the same as any parent has to do with his or her child. His correction is actually a by-product of his love for us. And I believe that just like any child, we can choose to ignore him and walk away from the life and wisdom he has for us—and that choice is what separates us from him. This is not to be confused with walking away from salvation, because that’s not what I’m saying here.
But even when we turn our backs, he still offers us his love. He is constantly seeking opportunities to show you and me more love and grace. He’s anything but the bully who so many people try to make him out to be. I think many of us need to shift our attention to the love and compassion he has to offer rather than the wrath and punishment that only come to those who are against him.
But while God isn’t a bully, some of the people who follow him sure are. For centuries we’ve seen people use God’s name as a tool to bully those who are different from them. Even today, people picket, protest, and yell because they believe it’s their God-given duty. Many Christians believe their calling here on earth is to pick apart the brokenness and failures of others, as if beating people down with their mess is the way to give them hope. But time and time again, I see this tactic fall short by miles. It does no good. In fact, it hurts.
This kind of mentality confuses me. It breaks my heart. And it’s something that keeps me up at night. I struggle with the many pointed fingers that are used as weapons to speak shame instead of redemption, and I struggle with the extreme judgment that comes from most self-proclaimed cross bearers when someone in the public eye fails. Why do pastors and religious leaders choose to use the failures of others as sermon illustrations? Why do Christian bloggers spew personalized hatred toward someone for the sake of article shares and page views? Why do some churches bash other churches because “they’re just not like us”? These are all questions I find myself pondering daily. God needs more champions of love and fewer religious trolls.
I sometimes wonder why God allows such examples of unlove to represent him. All of us fall short, but consistently living opposite of the way Jesus told us to is just outrageous. God must be shaking his head at the detrimental things being done in his name.
We can have different opinions, but our perspectives should be shared with love and sincerity, not with cruelty and rashness. Even when it’s a matter of sin, we shouldn’t let our responses become sinful in turn, misrepresenting the God we say we follow! It doesn’t make sense to combat something we see as darkness with more darkness.
Yes, not all Christians have chosen to act this way—but a lot of people have. We can all make decisions out of our own sense of rightness that are actively unloving toward the people Jesus loves. When we do these things, our selfish ambitions cover up our love for God—and that isn’t going to impress anyone into giving God a chance in his or her life.
It all comes back to a heart issue. When we act in unloving ways and portray God as the same, we are living out of sin and pride, which fuel us to think that it’s our obligation to reprimand and rebuke others who are no better or worse than we are. This type of behavior doesn’t help the expansion of God’s love, nor does it help bring anyone to know the love of God. Fear isn’t the way to convince people to have a relationship with God. The only way to do that is love. And remember, love is who God is.
Getting baptized was probably one of the most memorable moments of my faith journey. Not only because my father baptized me but also because my younger brother was dunked underneath the water and raised to new life in Christ that day too. My baptism had been a long time coming. The old was gone, and the new had begun. I wish I could say this happened without any rebellious years, but that simply wasn’t the case. I can’t count how many times I’ve apologized to my father for the way I acted as a teenager. He always laughs and tells me that it’s okay. But the reality is, it wasn’t. I acted like a fool, I ignored my family, and I tried to find my way through life on my own. It wasn’t until I came home to my heavenly Father that everything in my life changed, and I’m thankful that my earthly father welcomed me home with open arms as well. There were no questions, no comments, just open arms and compassion. I believe this type of love truly set me up for success in life. And this is the kind of love that we must be willing to show others, no matter how dark or desolate their state.
In Luke 15:11-32, Jesus paints the life-altering story of this kind of love—love for a son who continues to stray away from what’s right, while all along his loving father waits for him at home.
A man had two sons. The younger son told his father, “I want my share of your estate now before you die.” So his father agreed to divide his wealth between his sons.
LUKE 15:11-12
Asking for an early inheritance was outrageous. The younger son was essentially telling his father, “I wish you were already dead!” But the father accepted his son’s wishes, even while knowing it probably wasn’t the best idea. But one thing I’ve learned in life is that sometimes hearing wisdom from someone isn’t enough.
I imagine this father and son saying their last good-byes, the father handing over the son’s share of the inheritance and offering some final words of wisdom. “Make sure to put some of that money in savings,” he may have said. “Don’t spend it all in one place.” But he knew his son was going to make his own decisions no matter what he said, and he had to take a step back and let it happen.
A few days later this younger son packed all his belongings and moved to a distant land, and there he wasted all his money in wild living. About the time his money ran out, a great famine swept over the land, and he began to starve. He persuaded a local farmer to hire him, and the man sent him into his fields to feed the pigs. The young man became so hungry that even the pods he was feeding the pigs looked good to him. But no one gave him anything.
LUKE 15:13-16
The younger son finds himself destitute and alone, as I imagine his father warned him about. The Bible says that “he wasted all his money in wild living,” which we could guess included things such as gambling, prostitutes, luxurious living, and gluttony. The son lived like this until his money ran dry. I’m sure it all happened so fast in his mind. Where did all my money go? I imagine him thinking. And then . . . famine. Exactly when he needed his money the most, it was gone.
He was broke. He was alone. He was hungry. Trying to persuade a local farmer to hire him was probably a lot harder than we think—the famine probably had everyone scraping to get by. But he managed to get a job feeding the pigs. And for someone who had nothing, that food started to look appetizing. Can you imagine going from living a lifestyle resembling that of royalty to feeding pigs and contemplating whether to join them because of how hungry you are? He went from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows in what probably seemed like the blink of an eye.
When he finally came to his senses, he said to himself, “At home even the hired servants have food enough to spare, and here I am dying of hunger! I will go home to my father and say, ‘Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son. Please take me on as a hired servant.’”
So he returned home to his father.
LUKE 15:17-20
Something clicked within the son. His current circumstances in life were anything but where he wanted to be. And his heart began to change. The lifestyle he was living didn’t satisfy his yearning for fulfillment. He was broken. And he came to his senses. His father’s servants were better off than he was! They had a place to sleep, clean clothes, and bellies full of food—unlike him.
Eugene Peterson described the falsity of the world’s lies like this: “The first step toward God is a step away from the lies of the world.”[3] And that’s what the son did. He decided it was time for him to drop his pride and head back home, probably wondering whether his father would even speak to him. How on earth am I going to explain that my inheritance is gone? he probably thought. But he had no other choice. He could either live with the pigs and pretend as if everything was okay or admit his failure and seek forgiveness from his father. And let’s be honest—a lot of us sometimes would rather choose the first option than the second.
While he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him. His son said to him, “Father, I have sinned against both heaven and you, and I am no longer worthy of being called your son.”
But his father said to the servants, “Quick! Bring the finest robe in the house and put it on him. Get a ring for his finger and sandals for his feet. And kill the calf we have been fattening. We must celebrate with a feast, for this son of mine was dead and has now returned to life. He was lost, but now he is found.” So the party began.
LUKE 15:20-24
I’ve read countless times that a man running toward another man in these times was not something you’d ordinarily see. Imagine how overwhelmed with emotion the father was when he saw his son in the distance. I would feel the same way seeing one of my kids in the distance. Verse 20 says, “Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.” I believe the father knew why his son was coming home. He knew that his money had been wasted. He knew that his son had done just what he had warned against—but still the father ran. And God still runs after us.
After the son admitted his failures, he probably expected his father to be upset and reprimand him, which would have been completely acceptable. But the father didn’t do that. He did quite the opposite. The love that filled his heart led him to do something quite different. He welcomed his younger son with hugs, kisses, the finest robe in the house, sandals for his feet, and a gold ring for his finger. That’s what love does. The father acts as if his son never left in the first place, welcoming him home with love, grace, and the best he has to offer.
A father’s love for his children is something I never truly understood until I became a father myself. So I get it. I get why the father was so excited to see his boy returning home safe and in one piece. He couldn’t contain his joy.
The son didn’t expect any of this to happen—we know this because he said, “I am no longer worthy of being called your son” (verse 21). Convicted of his actions, he sought forgiveness from his father. And of course the father not only forgave him but also celebrated his return with a party and steak dinner.
Meanwhile, the older son was in the fields working. When he returned home, he heard music and dancing in the house, and he asked one of the servants what was going on. “Your brother is back,” he was told, “and your father has killed the fattened calf. We are celebrating because of his safe return.”
The older brother was angry and wouldn’t go in. His father came out and begged him, but he replied, “All these years I’ve slaved for you and never once refused to do a single thing you told me to. And in all that time you never gave me even one young goat for a feast with my friends. Yet when this son of yours comes back after squandering your money on prostitutes, you celebrate by killing the fattened calf!”
His father said to him, “Look, dear son, you have always stayed by me, and everything I have is yours. We had to celebrate this happy day. For your brother was dead and has come back to life! He was lost, but now he is found!”
LUKE 15:25-32
The older brother wasn’t too happy about the way his father responded. That’s a heart issue. People who haven’t truly encountered the love and grace of God don’t know how to respond when others receive it. But they, too, are deeply loved. They, too, are called to come home.
This story is beautiful because both you and I are the Prodigal Son. The father is our Father in heaven, and the brother is those who have yet to truly experience the undeserved grace and compassion of God.
So much can be unpacked in this parable, but one of the richest truths is contained in one word: prodigal. How often do you hear that word outside of this story? It’s not a word that frequently pops up in your Twitter feed, on TV, or in everyday conversation. Many of us, if pressed, probably couldn’t define it. We often associate it with being lost and then returning. Its actual definition, however, is quite different. Prodigal has two common meanings:
“Spending money or resources freely and recklessly; wastefully extravagant.”
“Having or giving something on a lavish scale.”[4]
The first definition clearly applies to the younger son. He took his inheritance and spent it on lavish living, throwing years of his father’s hard work and earnings down the drain. But the second definition also applies in this story—to the father. What happened when the son came home? Instead of chastising him for his reckless behavior, the father gave him a party on a lavish scale, killing the fattened calf and putting on a huge feast. That’s prodigal love: love that is lavish and extravagant. Prodigal love i
s the love that Jesus has for us—so much more than what we deserve. No matter what we do, he just keeps pouring it out—covering us in his love—and he longs for our love in return. I meet a lot of people who say they wouldn’t be caught dead inside a church building, that their lives are too messed up to be embraced by the arms of God, and that their previous failures are too monstrous to be forgiven by the grace of Jesus.
But no human is too broken for the all-consuming grace of our Lord and Savior. We’ve all done things we aren’t proud of, said things that we wish we could take back, and been places we wouldn’t dare go again. And while many of us have found redemption through the sacrifice of Jesus, we must remember that millions of other people in this world have yet to do the same.
The apostle Paul said in 1 Corinthians 15:9-10,
For I am the least of all the apostles. In fact, I’m not even worthy to be called an apostle after the way I persecuted God’s church.
But whatever I am now, it is all because God poured out his special favor on me—and not without results. For I have worked harder than any of the other apostles; yet it was not I but God who was working through me by his grace.
The truth behind Paul’s words is revitalizing and scandalous: that even a man who once persecuted the church of Jesus Christ has now been redeemed and forgiven by God’s grace. A second chance awaited Paul through the transforming, prodigal love of Christ.
No matter what you’ve done, the grace and love of Jesus are waiting for you. You don’t need to reach a certain level of “goodness” before you can pray, walk into a church, read a Bible, or even be used by God. He will take you where you are, but he loves you too much to leave you that way. Remember, nobody is too broken for the grace and love of Jesus.
God’s love isn’t only available to us when we’re good. We’re all prodigals in need of our Father’s love. He’s waiting for us with open arms when we decide to return home. And he’ll even throw a party for us. That’s how much he loves us.