Secret

by Skye Warren

  I wasn’t sure if I could. I had resigned myself to death, to rape. But consensual paid sex?

  Unbearable.

  There was a mirror each prostitute must wear. A man thought he was using me? No, I was using him. His physical impulses, his money. He was the one being manipulated. A woman looked down on me? No, I looked down on her. She spread her legs for free. She was the cheap one. The mirror was a shield, and mine was gone, shattered by a few brief hours of true happiness, of real sex, of realizing that the only person I was tricking was myself.

  But I had to do it, for Claire. For myself, because this was the goal I had set, to protect her as no one had done for me.

  I watched from the window as Henri and a few other men walked to the black Escalade across the street and took off. The door opened, and I turned, expecting Jade. Instead it was Jenny, from the hotel suite party that day. I sucked in a breath of surprise and relief. “You’re alive.”

  She glanced down the hallway and then crept inside. Her step was unsteady, pupils dilated. I wondered if she’d been the one I’d heard through the wall, getting banged. I wondered if she had even felt it, as high as she probably was, though it was for the best if she couldn’t.

  “I can’t stay long,” she mumbled. “I have an appointment.”

  I held her hand. It was shaking. “What is it?”

  “I heard what Henri told you. Don’t believe him.”

  A sick feeling turned my stomach. Of course it would be foolhardy to trust someone like Henri, but in this position, I didn’t really have a choice. “Why not?” I managed.

  “That’s the same deal he made with me.” She shuddered. “My…my boyfriend stole money from him, too much to pay back. Henri promised he would forget his debts if I agreed to work for him.”

  I could guess where this story led. “And?”

  “And he shot him, right in front of me. I’ve been hooking for him ever since.”

  Chapter Nine

  I kept the tomato soup down, but barely. When dinner came, I almost threw up from the smell of grilled chicken alone. Jade relented and took it away. I showered and shaved and put on makeup that came standard with each room. The same garish colors for every girl, the same skimpy clothes. I dressed with a lacy black bra and matching thigh-high stockings, a black silk sheath and high heels. Rituals I had done countless times, but they didn’t steady my mind this time.

  They didn’t numb me.

  A silver Jaguar parked in the lot across the street, conspicuous in its luxury. Men had streamed in and out all day long for other women. But I suspected this one was for me. If Henri was going to make a deal like that, he must have lined up some heavy hitters. I would be his road back to the top, the star of the show, motherfucking Winnie-the-Pooh.

  A man dressed in all black crossed the street with long strides. I waited, imagining him stepping inside the darkened door, paying Jade at the front desk, being escorted up the stairs. I imagined his wife waiting for him at home, wondering why their sex life sucked. Or maybe she was relieved.

  Footsteps approached down the hallway.

  “This one,” I heard Jade say through the door, and then it opened.

  A man. Of course it was a man, but it took me a second to recognize him out of context, as he was wearing a sleek business suit. I barely stopped myself from saying his name.

  Major.

  Jade must have caught the recognition in my eyes. “You know him?”

  I forced myself to shrug. “An old friend.”

  At least it felt like a million years ago. I felt older too, or maybe just wiser.

  She knew I meant client, but her eyes narrowed. This was my first client since my kidnapping, after all. If I screamed rape, they’d have a hell of a time keeping it quiet. At some point, they couldn’t kill every client who talked shit about them. It was bad for business.

  We kept to our roles, though. Major with raw lust in his eyes. Me bored and mildly fearful. We must have been convincing, because Jade nodded and shut the door.

  I opened my mouth to speak, but he gave a short shake of his head, then glanced at the door. Jade was listening.

  Rising, I went to take his jacket. Before I reached him¸ he shrugged it off and handed it to me. I took it from him, feeling the weight and shape of a gun wrapped inside.

  I raised my eyebrows. What’s this?

  He raised his back in unspoken challenge.

  Okay, then. As I laid his jacket on the side table, I slipped the gun underneath the seat cushion.

  “How much time do we have?” I asked in my usual voice. It was a customer question to ask at the beginning.

  “Thirty minutes.”

  Oh, how the mighty had fallen. Once, my time had been sold by the evening. Hourly rates were available, of course. But half hour? I was a little offended. I guess a soul was worth something after all.

  Major’s expression was hard; his eyes glinted. Jade would have interpreted that as lust, or good old-fashioned cruelty. I knew it as tension. He was nervous, which meant I was nervous too. He glanced at the bed, then turned away and sat down in the chair Henri had used. I sat across from him.

  “What…” I tried to think of something innocuous, something I would ask as an escort when all I really wanted to do was pin him to the ground and ask him if he’d heard anything in the news. “What would you like to do tonight?”

  “See, I have this problem.”

  “You do?”

  “I don’t want to come too soon.”

  “Oh.” I made a face that I hoped was sympathetic, even though it amused me that he was using premature ejaculation as a code. He and I were cut from the same cloth.

  “Right.” Humor danced in his eyes. “You understand how it would be, with those urges to finish quickly. But sometimes I think it’s better to go slow. Don’t you agree?”

  “However you want to do it,” I forced out.

  “How accommodating,” he said, his expression sardonic. “I don’t like the girl to come too quickly either. In fact, not at all while I’m here, you understand? If you need to go, you do it after I leave.”

  “Okay.” I drew out the word, not quite sure what he meant.

  “Right after I leave.”

  “Oh.”

  He stood and wandered over to the window, looking outside. He tapped lightly on the windowpane, seemingly casual. “I think it’ll be a shattering climax.”

  It took me a second to register. He wanted me to jump out the window. Right after he left.

  Oh hell, no. I shook my head frantically. “You know, I don’t think I’m a shattering climax kind of girl.”

  He smiled wolfishly. “Tonight you will be. You’ll go just the way I came.”

  I followed his line of sight to the Jaguar in the parking lot. I understood the plan, such as it were. I should jump out the window and head for his car. But God, this was a horrible idea. The only thing more horrible than doing it was not doing it.

  “Now come to the bed, sweets. I paid a lot for my time, and I intend to walk away satisfied.”

  After thirty minutes of moaning for me and two hundred and forty push-ups for Major, we were ready. Jade came and knocked at the door to bring him back down. He was sweaty and panting, clothes askew. I was armed with a few more directions he’d been able to squeeze out during exhales.

  I waited at the window until I heard shots fired downstairs. The men standing outside ran in, and that’s when I tried the window. It wasn’t locked from the outside, so after a few pushes, I managed to get it open. The bigger problem was the bars on the window. That was where the gun came in.

  “Aim for the brick,” he’d said, panting through his workout.

  I leaned over the window, looking at the large screws that held the bars to the wall. If I blasted the bricks they were in, the whole thing would come off. Hopefully.

  I took aim, squinting into the sight. Lining it up. Slowly, slowly, I pulled the trigger. Oh shit, what am I doing? I thought right before the sound of
gunfire exploded in my ears.

  The shell ricocheted back into my face; the gun pinged directly off metal. I ducked back into the room for a second, but the shouting from downstairs spurred me on. I peeked over the ledge and saw that the metal had bent right out of the wall.

  Hah! So much for hitting the brick.

  I congratulated myself on my badassery before moving to the next one. Which I missed, entirely. But there wasn’t time, so I shot again and again. As the third one came off, the whole grate tilted on its axis, hanging from the last screw.

  I didn’t need to remove that one to get out, so I slung one leg over the window and prayed. I didn’t bother with shoes, and at least the black sheath was easy to move in.

  I looked down at the garbage dump. Footsteps sounded outside the door, and I jerked, almost falling headfirst out the window. The door slammed open, and I thought my heart would burst. That didn’t happen, but I did pee myself—just a little.

  It was Jenny, white as a sheet. “What’s happening?”

  “We’ve got to get out of here,” I said.

  “Okay. You jump, and I’ll follow.”

  “Right,” I said, not moving.

  “Shelly,” she said urgently.

  I glanced down and then away. “I might have a small fear of heights.”

  She rolled her eyes and then pushed me.

  “Wait,” I cried, but it was too late. My leg scraped along the jagged edge of the bars as I fell. I landed sprawled on the lid of the Dumpster. The impact jittered up my whole body, and my teeth chattered with the agony of it. A red gash ran from the outside of my knee to the ankle.

  “Move,” Jenny demanded.

  With shaky legs, I slid to the side and turned my face, ready to send encouragement. But by the time I called her name, she was already falling, landing in a far more graceful heap. No painful leg gashes for her.

  “Well, yeah,” I said. “Because you saw me go first.”

  She hopped onto the street beside me. “We have a plan after this?”

  Damn, how had she recovered so quickly? And she looked more alert than I had ever seen. I glared at her as I stumbled onto the ground, wincing as the weight of my step shot pain up my shin.

  “Come on.” I took her hand, and we ran across the street. Or really, she ran. I hobbled. We crouched behind the Jaguar and peeked over the hood. No one appeared to have seen us. In fact, we couldn’t see anyone at all. Everyone was inside and quiet, which meant they were either dead…or Major was.

  Chapter Ten

  I slipped into the driver’s seat, and Jenny took the passenger’s. No keys. I felt around in the pockets of the car. Jenny flipped the visor down, and the keys fell on my head.

  “Ouch,” I said, rubbing the spot.

  “Let’s go,” she muttered, watching the door of the complex.

  “I have to wait for someone.” She gave me a look, and I recoiled from the vitriol of it.

  “A man?”

  “The man who helped us escape,” I retorted.

  Her cool gaze slid to the keys in my hand, then back to me. I got the impression she was measuring me, deciding whether to take them by force. My fingers tightened on the keys as I waited.

  The tension released from her in a breath as she had apparently decided to keep me around. “You better hope he comes out soon,” she said, her gaze glued to the door. “If they find us, we are so fucked.”

  I let out a breath. “I cannot believe you were faking it all this time.”

  She snorted. “As if you don’t.”

  “I don’t mean orgasms. I mean pretending to be high and stupid,” I said. “All the freaking time.”

  “We all have our masks to bear.”

  “You could have been straight with me. What did you think, I would go tell Henri?”

  Her look was assessing. “You might have. I couldn’t trust you. I still don’t, but you’re the one with the ticket out of here.”

  I touched the gash on my leg, then winced. “They really did a number on you, didn’t they?”

  She laughed softly. “You’re one to talk.”

  I felt Jenny tense beside me. I looked back to see a man walking out of the building. Major.

  “He’s with us,” I said.

  Major walked across the street, focused but unhurried. When he reached the car, I climbed between the seats into the back while he got in and drove.

  “You got blood on the seats,” he said.

  “Yes, I’m fine. Thank you for your concern,” I said sarcastically, collapsing against the back. “How did you know where to find me?”

  “Let’s just say I have friends in low places.”

  “Well, you do know Shelly,” Jenny said.

  “That’s it,” I said. “I was going to actually help you, but since you’re being rude, I’m going to sic Marguerite on you.”

  She scoffed. “Another pimp? Please.”

  “Much worse. She runs a shelter.”

  “A shelter?” Jenny cut in. “I don’t want to go to a shelter. Hell, no. Do I look like a poor battered woman to you?”

  Major looked over at her, from her dirty, tangled hair down to her bruised arms. “This is a trick question, right?”

  She crossed her arms. “I’m not going.”

  He looked back at me. She’s your friend. You talk to her.

  “Well, that’s where we’re going, so unless you’re planning on doing the tuck-and-roll out of a moving vehicle, so are you. Besides, you haven’t lived among regular people in years. No way are you surviving on your own.”

  “That’s your motivational speech?” he asked me, incredulous.

  I waved my hand. “I don’t do positive thinking. That’s what my shelter is for.”

  In the rearview mirror, I saw Major raise his eyebrow. “Your shelter?”

  I felt heat creep up my neck. “No, not mine. I mean, I just—”

  “What, like, you volunteer there or something?” Jenny asked.

  “No. Definitely not.”

  “Spill,” Major said.

  I sighed, resigned to explaining my random, very nonpossessive connection to this place. Really, what did I care about them? Nope, barely at all.

  “I was at the clinic to get my birth control pills and monthly testing done. And this lady comes up to me in the waiting room, saying how I was such a beautiful soul and I didn’t have to do this and she could help me live a better life.”

  Jenny made a disgusted sound.

  “Right? So I get the hell away from her, but then I met Marguerite, who is not sweet. Honestly, she’s kind of a bitch, but that’s why I tolerate her. She guilted me into giving money for the girls to start new lives. Then when they got too big for the house they were using, I bought them a new building. Whatever.”

  “You bought them a building,” Jenny repeated.

  I shrugged. “By that time, I was with Philip. He’s pretty generous.”

  “But a building?” She seemed stunned. “I have two thousand dollars stuffed inside my bra right now, which is all the money I have.”

  I winced. Paper cuts had never been my thing. “And that’s why we’re taking you to the shelter.”

  She spoke quietly. “I’ve been in hiding for the past five years, hiding inside my own body. No way am I going back to that life.”

  I gentled my voice. “The thing about the shelter is, they aren’t hiding from life. They’re living it. It took me a while to figure that out too.”

  She swallowed, looking scared. “Okay. I’ll go.”

  “Good. I’ll get you settled in too. It won’t be so bad.”

  “Wait a second,” she said. “After convincing me to go to this place, you’re not staying?”

  “My orders are very specific,” Major said. “Get you out and keep you safe until Luke can meet up with us.”

  “Sorry, I’ve got some things to take care of. Clearing my name and all that.”

  “I thought you knew,” he said.

  That sounded ominous.
“Thought I knew what?”

  “The police department. They’ve moved on. Technically, you’re still wanted for questioning in connection with the crimes, but they’ve removed the arrest warrant on you and that other girl. You’re free.”

  “Wow.” So Henri came through for me after all.

  He continued. “The cops can’t justify spending their time looking for someone when everyone knows you guys aren’t a threat anyway.”

  A small sound came from Jenny. She looked outside.

  “What is it?” I asked.

  “So, don’t lose your shit.”

  “Shit.” I should have known it wouldn’t be that easy. “What did you do?”

  “Nothing. Well, not exactly. I overheard Henri talking. Apparently he’s going to talk to someone right now. Negotiating for your release.”

  I turned to Major. “Where exactly did you say Luke was?”

  His silence was damning.

  “Fuck.”

  “There’s no way he’ll actually do it,” Jenny said. “You heard him.”

  Yes, I had heard Henri’s plans for me. More than that, I remembered Jenny’s story from earlier. Henri would do anything to get even. It was the reason he was so successful. Desperate to claw his way back to the top, he wouldn’t abandon his brutality now.

  “Major, you know where he is.”

  “Goddamn it.”

  “Take me there. Right now.” I paused. “Please.”

  “Luke’s not going to like that,” he muttered.

  We drove straight to the Barracks. I spent most of the trip hyperventilating in the backseat while Major gave Jenny a kind of guided tour through Chicago. She had been incredibly sheltered under Henri’s thumb and displayed a childlike excitement at every new landmark. I could tell Major was charmed. Well, Henri hadn’t been an idiot. We might have been pawns, but the girls in his elite were good at what we did—making men want us.

  When we got to the Barracks, Major pulled behind a copse of trees. The headlights were off, and we rolled gently over the rocky landscape.

  “You guys can go,” I said. “I’ll go in alone.”