Of Thorn and Thread

by Chanda Hahn

  My hands balled into angry fists as I pushed past him and headed outside. Devin had already prepared my horse, and because he knew how sore I was, I allowed him to help me on to Damsel.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Liam’s frustration at his inability to intimidate me into staying. He flicked his reins, and his horse took off at a gallop. The rest of his troops followed swiftly behind. Without another word, I spurred my horse on and took off after the cloud of dust left by the troops. We rode at breakneck speed for hours, and only slowed when the terrain became too dangerous as we climbed up a great hill and looked out at the valley below. Liam stopped, and I pulled up beside him.

  I gasped at the horror of what I saw below. In the far distance was the forlorn silhouette of a castle sitting above a little town. But to the west, a dark sky loomed, and the land was covered by a thick fog.

  “Is that where we’re going?” I asked, seeing Liam’s hesitation.

  He looked to the palace and back to the ominous fog, studying the layout of the woods to the west. “Yes, I’m supposed to take you through Somnielle to the palace.” He pointed toward the town, then to the castle built high on a hill. Below it, a forest and steep cliffs surrounded the structure.

  A faint hum started in my pocket, and I reached into my cloak to pull out the spindle that Oma had given me. The wood was warm in my hand, and I could feel it pulse softly in my fingers, the golden thread flickering softly. I lifted it in the air, letting my arm swing back and forth like a pendulum . . . until I felt a tug on the spindle. A thread pulled off, and it pulsed harder until I felt a shock in my fingers. I almost dropped the spindle, and I looked at where it had sent off the spark.

  I studied the ebb and flow of the fog, taking into account the spindle’s magic.

  “No,” I exclaimed.

  “No?” he asked.

  “We go there.” I pointed. “Just beyond the fog, to the northwest. A swirl in the fog, a miniscule vortex. Do you see it?”

  Liam squinted and followed my hand. “I’ve never noticed it before. What is it?”

  “It’s the source of your blight.”

  “What do you think we will find?” He looked at me expectantly.

  I shook my head. “I don’t know.”

  His shoulders dropped.

  He didn’t need to say anything to me. I understood where his hopelessness came from. He had wanted to return with a weapon, but he returned with a liability, and because he searched for me to save me from Madam Esme’s, we arrived too late to save the city.

  “Where did you get that?” Liam asked, pointing to the spindle in my hand. “Looks old and beat up.”

  “I got it from the old woman at the inn. It will bring me luck.”

  “Good, we’ll need all the luck we can get to survive the fog.”

  Devin rode up next to us and surveyed the blight. He let out a low whistle. “I heard, but still never expected it to be this bad. What do you think happened to the second contingent of troops the king sent to stop the blight?”

  Liam’s face hardened. “If they encountered what I did, then they’re gone.”

  “How do we fight against magic we don’t understand?” Devin asked.

  Liam glanced at me, and then away. “There are many things in this world we don’t understand, and plenty we do. We may not understand magic, or spells, but we have faith, courage, and hope—and it is because of that I believe we will find a way.”

  Devin smirked. “It didn’t work before, why should it work now?”

  “Because now we’re backed into a corner and we have no choice.” Liam turned and gave Devin a malicious grin. “And that’s when we become the most dangerous.”

  I wanted to say something profound or encouraging, but Liam turned toward his men, raised his sword high in the air, and yelled out, “Onward to protect Rya!”

  The mood shifted from despair to grim determination. I felt the goosebumps rise along my arms, and I could sense the change in the air. Feel the willpower of the troops led by Liam. Even I felt encouraged by his charisma, spurring my horse and falling in line behind Devin as we began our race toward the fog.

  As we ran along the river, I saw flashes of silver as undines were racing downstream and along the banks, while herds of deer, elk, and small forest creatures were quickly evacuating. Specks of black covered the sky as flocks of birds were following the same path—away from the blight.

  On the roads we met cart after cart pulled by donkey, horse, or even steer as people evacuated their homes and were heading toward the castle. No one wanted to stay to meet the doom slowly creeping toward their doorstep.

  Except for us, and we rode straight toward it.

  A howling screech ripped through the air, spooking the horses, and scattering our formation. We entered the fog, and immediately the sky darkened. We could feel a mental oppression weighing heavy on our minds.

  “What was that?” I asked.

  Devin, Hayes, and Berk drew their swords and moved to the inside of the path, putting themselves between the loud sound and me.

  “I don’t know. I’ve never heard that sound before,” Devin whispered.

  “Banshee,” Liam said, his back straight, eyes scanning all the shadows for danger. “Don’t stop, men. Keep moving. This is not the part of the woods where you want to dawdle,” he warned.

  “Why not?” I asked.

  “What you’re hearing are the dark fae.”

  “But they’re home is a good forty miles west of here,” Hayes said.

  “Their hunting ground has migrated with the blight. It’s best if we go unnoticed. Take off the bridles and armor. We must move through the fog as quietly as we can.” Liam raised an eyebrow at me. “Still glad you came?”

  “It’s going to take more than the threat of dark fae to scare me,” I said firmly.

  “Good to hear.”

  He turned and rode back to the front. Using hand signals to direct his men, they switched out the decorated harnesses for simpler leather bridles, tucking away all of their standards, bells, and any piece of metal that jangled or made noise. Berk oiled the axles on the wagon, and I watched the forest, searching the darkness for any hidden threat.

  A candle mark later we were on our way again, but at a much slower pace. One man scouted the path and held back tree branches and moved sections of logs that would make noise or slow us down. Sunlight couldn’t penetrate the fog to reach the forest floor, and within the cloudy haze, the stench of sulfur was overwhelming. Without the sun, navigating the woods became almost impossible, for every time we made headway, the woods twisted and shifted. The fog thickened, and we found ourselves right back where we’d started.

  “I’ve never seen anything like this?” Devin whispered.

  “Me neither.” I shuddered.

  Only our hunger pangs and exhaustion gave us a clue as to how much time had passed, and once again, we were forced to make camp in the near darkness under a canopy of silence. My training with Devin and Hayes became more of a silent dance than actual training. Something we needed to do to pass the time and take our mind off of our surroundings.

  We worked without weapons, for the clang of contact would rattle through the forest. Instead, we mimed hand-to-hand, fighting in slow motion, where whispered punches, dodges, and footwork became our routine. But the long hours and never-ending fog wore on us emotionally, physically, and mentally, and we let our guard down.

  In the middle of the third night, lost in the fog, one man slipped away, abandoning his post. Liam was quiet. He didn’t mention the deserter, nor would he speak on it. The next night, he made the guard rotations shorter and even took the first watch.

  I rolled over onto my side and tried to get comfortable on my bedroll. Keeping the spindle out, I would watch it to see if it glowed or gave me any sign of where to go. It stayed dim.

  I missed the privacy of my tent, but until we were past the dense fog, we were sleeping in the open without a fire. Cradling my arm under my head, I star
ed out across the sleeping forms of Jon and Hayes. The soldiers huddled under their red cloaks on the ground looked like long mushrooms.

  Shivering, I pulled my saddle blanket closer to my neck and easily spotted Liam sitting against a trunk watching over the camp. He didn’t sleep, or at least I didn’t think he did. The dark circles under his eyes told me he’d spent most of the night wide awake watching the fog, and I spent as much time watching him.

  With a frustrated sigh, I sat up and felt under my bedroll for the rock that was jabbing painfully into my ribcage. Freeing the stone from the earth, I was about to toss it away when I noticed the empty bedroll closest to me that moments ago had been occupied.

  I tossed the stone and hit Hayes in the back. He groaned and sat up. “What?”

  “Where’s Jon?” I whispered, pointing to the empty bedroll.

  Hayes yawned. “Probably went to take a leak. Go back to sleep.”

  Heat warmed my cheeks, and I lay back down, feeling an absolute fool. He was probably right, and I was overreacting. My eyelids became heavy, and I drifted off.

  “He’s gone.” Hayes shook my shoulder.

  Rubbing my eyes, I looked up into Hayes’ worried expression.

  “Jon didn’t come back?” I asked.

  He shook his head.

  “Go wake Liam,” I said.

  Hayes silently moved through the camp, and I went to Jon’s bedroll and placed my hand upon the cloth. It was cold and damp from the fog, signifying it had been empty for a long time.

  They roused the rest of camp from their sleep, and Devin went to check with the guards. I paced back and forth, biting my thumbnail in guilt. Devin walked past, his face grim.

  “Any word?” I asked, stopping him.

  “No.”

  Liam and Hayes joined us. “He’s not the only one. Another one’s missing.”

  “Maybe they got lost in the fog?” Devin asked.

  I caught Liam’s dire look. “I don’t know. One can only hope for the best, but expect the worst,” he said.

  My chest hurt and the words just burst forth. “I’m sorry, this is all my fault. One minute Jon was there, and then he was gone. I should have known better.”

  “No, I was the one that told you to go back to sleep,” Hayes interjected.

  “Now, what? Do we go looking for them?” I asked.

  “Aura, it won’t be any use. We can’t even find our way out of the fog. I won’t risk any more men getting lost.” Liam’s green eyes met mine. “Unless we have a guide. Someone who can hear thoughts.”

  I swallowed and stepped back. “I can’t.”

  “Can’t, or won’t?” Liam snapped.

  “You know nothing.”

  “I think your magic is still there. I think you’re just afraid to use it.”

  “Magic. What magic?” Devin asked. He cocked his head and gave me a strange look.

  “She’s a sorceress . . . and she can hear your thoughts.” Liam gave Devin a sly grin.

  “What?” Devin’s eyes widened. He glanced my way and blushed. “Oh . . . uh, that may have been good to know earlier.”

  “I can’t hear thoughts anymore,” I said. “It’s gone.” I spun and stormed away, but Liam came after me.

  He grasped my wrist, and whispered, “How do you know if you won’t even try?”

  “Let me go.”

  “You said you wanted to help, so help. Or are the rumors true about how cold and heartless the daughters of Eville are?”

  “Fine.” I wrenched my arm free. I moved to the edge of camp and stared into the dense fog. An icy wind blew, batting at my hair, causing goosebumps to run along my arms. Crossing them over my chest, I tried to squeeze warmth into my body as I internally debated with myself. My gifts weren’t something that I could turn off and turn on, otherwise I would have had better control over it. It was just always a part of me.

  Closing my eyes, I focused on reaching out. Searching, seeking, but I got nothing. Groaning, I focused harder on what Oma said. It wasn’t lost. That had to mean it would come back if I wanted it to. The problem was . . . the underlying issue and fear that was blocking me. If I didn’t want my empathy gifts back, then I could live a normal life, get married, have children. But to take back my gift, it would doom myself to a life of early madness.

  I couldn’t help but think back to the pain I was in at the palace in Candor. The thousands of thoughts that dragged through my mind . . . when I would have done anything to silence them and have peace. Funny, now I didn’t feel at peace. I felt unsettled, on edge, because I was always guessing what others were thinking instead of just reading them.

  Liam watched me. Waiting for me to act. Being normal seemed to create an even greater distance between us, for he had no reason to shield me, and seemed to give that duty to Devin. But I didn’t want Devin. I wanted Liam.

  I was going crazy being away from him. No matter the choice I made, I would go mad. At least knowing I had a choice, I could make the right one. One that would help the knight who traveled all the way to Nihill. He wanted a savior. I wanted to be that for him. Even if I feared my gifts and my future, I needed them to save Liam’s men—even if I destroyed myself doing it.

  Closing my eyes, I kneeled and buried my fingers in the dirt, feeling the ground, searching for the magic ley lines deep in the earth, but I couldn’t feel or hear anything.

  I bit my cheek in frustration. Never had it been this difficult to sense the ley lines. Maybe my connection was truly severed? Dragging my finger in the dirt, I traced the symbol for the word accept.

  “I accept,” I whispered. “I accept my power.” I felt a soft rumble of magic, and then felt it slapped away. “What was that?” I said in surprise. “What happened?”

  A shuffle of gravel had me turning to look up at Liam, who stood over me. I stood, dusting off my hands.

  “Anything?” he asked.

  “Nothing,” I snapped irritably.

  “Try again,” Liam demanded.

  I preferred the old Liam over this new angrier, bossy version. “I did.” I sighed. “I can’t hear or feel anything, even when I reached for it. It’s like I’m blocked. I . . .” I trailed off and met Liam’s determined green eyes. And then it hit me. “It’s you.” I pointed my finger at him.

  “Me?”

  “You’re blocking me.” I snorted. “I haven’t lost my powers. Yours have grown.”

  Liam shook his head and scoffed. “No, that can’t be.”

  Grinning in triumph, I poked him in the chest with my finger. “It is. Your shield magic has grown, and you’re shielding me.”

  I caught him by surprise. “Am not.” He raised his hands in surrender.

  It made sense. “Ever since Devin rescued me, you’ve done nothing but blame yourself for my capture. You’re consumed with guilt, and that emotion has only increased your desire to protect me. Your shield magic has completely blocked me from accessing mine without even touching me.”

  Liam’s shoulders dropped. “I didn’t know. I can’t control it.”

  “And yet, you expect me to control mine.” I smirked. “Well, you can drop it now,” I said softly, and placed my hand on his arm, feeling his muscles tremble beneath my touch.

  Liam’s brows knit together, and he tried to concentrate. “How?”

  “I don’t know.” I tried to think of a way to teach him control when he’d never been trained. I bent down and picked up a river stone. I placed it in his palm and clasped his hand around it. “Hold this stone and squeeze it tight. Now slowly, one by one, open your fingers and let the stone slide out of your palm”.

  Liam followed my instructions, and we both watched the gray rock fall and hit the ground with a thud.

  “Good.” I scooped up the stone and had him repeat the exercise.

  “Do it again. But this time, visualize that it’s me. I’m the stone.”

  His fingers squeezed so hard his knuckles turned white. His lips turned down and his brows furrowed.

  “
Let me go,” I whispered.

  His fist trembled, and he gazed at me. “No, I can’t. You’ll get hurt.”

  “That’s part of life. You can’t protect me forever.”

  Liam didn’t like that answer. “I can try.”

  This was getting us nowhere. He was refusing to drop his shield magic, and I was useless being this close to him.

  “It’s not your job to protect me,” I said.

  “I promised I’d watch over you.”

  A prickly feeling ran up my spine, and I turned and looked among the men, my gut telling me we were in danger. But from what?

  Devin had been a silent observer during our entire exchange. He picked up my nervous energy and moved to my side, giving me a curious look.

  I scanned the dense fog. The feeling wasn’t leaving, instead it was a growing discomfort in my gut that I couldn’t ignore. We were in danger, but I couldn’t sense it. “Liam, I need you to back off,” I said.

  His eyes darkened. “You can’t tell me what to—”

  Panicked, I yelled at him. “I don’t want you.”

  He stepped back, his brows furrowed, and I saw the stubborn line in his jaw. He wasn’t going to let go, or he didn’t know how, and I was desperate.

  I’m sorry, Liam, I cried out mentally. I reached out for Devin’s hand and took it in mine. Turning toward him, I went on my tiptoes, my hands wrapping around Devin’s neck, pulling myself close. Not sure what to do or how to act, I just hoped that he’d meet me halfway. I pressed my lips to his awkwardly.

  I felt a mental slap as Liam’s anger grew, and his magic pressed into my mind. I caught Devin by surprise. His hands rested on my hips and he kept the kiss chaste, not willing to kiss me in front of his friend.

  But chaste wouldn’t get Liam to get angry enough to hate me and drop the shield. I pulled Devin closer, and he must have read my desperation. His lips moved against mine, his hands lifted and wrapped around my back, crushing me to him. He deepened the kiss, and I gave a squeak of surprise that sounded like a moan. He lifted me into the air, my feet dangling as he kissed me. I didn’t enjoy it. Instead, the mental power that I felt pressing against me changed. It turned cold. I shivered, and Devin slowly released me, letting my body drag against his as my feet found purchase on the ground.