Forgiveness

by Wilder, Chiah

  Maggie jolted and jumped as strong arms wrapped around her from behind. Flux swung her around in a tight circle and she squealed before he put her back down again. He wouldn’t let go of her hand and forced her to spin around and face him. Then he snagged her around the waist and drew her to him for a passionate, never-ending kiss that made everything around them fall away to nothing.

  When Flux pulled back, they were both panting and he wore one of the biggest smiles she’d ever seen on him. He squeezed her waist, nuzzling into her neck with a soft sigh.

  “That’s my woman. I just fuckin’ knew you’d win this, darlin’,” he whispered, his voice raw with a mix of emotions. He stared down at her and wiped a tear from her cheek with the pad of his thumb. “Next up, world domination?”

  Maggie laughed and shrugged, unsure what mountains were left to climb anymore. This had been it. Afterward? Literally anything was fair game. No limits. She could live the life she had always dreamed, outside of the rodeo. Preparing for this single moment had taken so much out of her life and given so much back to her ambition, but as the dawning of the title fell into place inside her heart, maybe prioritizing things other than her career might not be too bad. It may even be fun.

  With a quick kiss to her man’s cheek, Maggie turned to smile again for the cameras knowing that the hot kiss they’d shared would be plastered across the internet in a matter of minutes, but she didn’t give a rat’s ass about it, another first for the career-conscious Maggie.

  “Maggie,” her mother cried out as she rushed toward her, arms outstretched.

  She fell into her mother’s embrace then her father was there right beside her, his arms wrapped around her as her three brothers stood to the side grinning at her from ear to ear.

  “We’re so proud of you,” her father said as he pulled her back into another hug.

  “You were great,” Tyler said.

  “Thanks.” She smiled at her younger brother.

  Her mother glanced at Flux, and Maggie reached for his hand and tugged him to her. “I want you to meet Flux,” she said, tightening her hold on his fingers. She glanced up at him. “Flux these are my parents, and these three guys are my brothers—Tyler, Chris, and Jess.”

  Flux held out his hand and shook the hands of her father and brothers and tipped his head to her mother while saying, “Pleased to meet you.”

  Maggie ignored her mother’s inquisitive look—there would be time enough to answer all her questions when Maggie returned home in a few days.

  “Did you want to go out and celebrate tonight?” her mother asked.

  Maggie felt Flux stiffen next to her. “Not really, Mom—I’m totally beat.”

  “Of course you are, sweetheart,” her dad said. He looked over his shoulder at the crowd of photographers and reporters. “They’re all chomping at the bit to talk to you. If you need anything, let us know. We’ll talk to you tomorrow.” He threw a quick glance at Flux then put his arm around Maggie’s mom. “We should get going, Nellie.”

  Maggie watched as her family walked away then glanced up at Flux and winked. She then took a deep breath and faced the reporters.

  As the rest of the rodeo died down and the crowds dispersed, Maggie inhaled deeply, loving the familiar smells she’d known most of her life: sweet hay, dirt, sweat, manure, and buttered popcorn. She doubted she could ever give them up entirely. The win that night opened the door to her future, and anything was possible; it was the most freeing feeling she’d ever had in her life.

  Still in the center of the ring answering questions and smiling for the cameras, Maggie thought it would never end. She’d been at it for nearly forty-five minutes and her head was ready to explode.

  “We should get Odysseus back to the stalls for cleaning.” Maggie gently nudged Flux and he immediately got the hint that she was ready to get away from the chaos that came with her big win.

  “No problem—leave it to me, Duchess,” he whispered against her ear before turning to the reporters and photographers. “Interviews and photos are done. Maggie’s beat and so is her horse. Thanks for showing up.”

  “Just one more question.” A balding man pushed forward, a microphone in his hand.

  “You don’t hear so good, do you? I said we’re fuckin’ done here.” Flux glared at the man whose face fell, and Maggie suppressed a laugh as love for her man gushed through her.

  Flux put a hand on the small of her back, and the tension from the race and the aftermath slowly leaked away. In silence, Maggie allowed him to lead both her and Odysseus to the stables behind the rodeo, where she’d spend the next hour and a half pampering and spoiling the hell out of her horse.

  “I’ve never seen anything like tonight. Fuck, this was really the big leagues. I’m glad my ass wasn’t in the ring fighting those damn bulls.” Flux chuckled.

  “At least they weren’t pumped up. The Nationals are real strict with that kind of crap. They test all the animals and the competitors. A lot of barrel racers flush steroids into their horses. I can’t imagine doing that.” She stopped and gave Odysseus a quick peck on the side of his face.

  “That shit won’t get any of those assholes anywhere. They won’t be able get the big win if they happen to make it here from cheating.”

  Maggie nodded. “You’re right. I was just disappointed in Charlie’s decision. I kind of figured he wouldn’t do shit about Eddie because they’re friends from way back. Charlie just told him to stop it—like Eddie’s going to really do that.”

  “He won’t be doing it for a while in Colorado at least.”

  “Why do you say that?” The faint lines across Maggie’s forehead deepened in confusion.

  “Just a hunch. Charlie shoulda thrown that fuckin’ bull rider out on his ass,” Flux said, anger lacing his voice.

  “I knew he wouldn’t. Chet’s become the golden boy on the amateur circuit, and if he’d stop using shit to enhance his endurance, he’d probably be a real contender for the Nationals. There’s big money in the rodeo world. But at least Charlie gave him a four-month suspension, which I know didn’t sit too well with Chet.”

  “You’re done with the amateur shit now, so you don’t have to see any of those SOBs, including Charlie.”

  Maggie laughed. “Charlie’s not bad—he’s just a businessman who can be really greedy. I’ve known him since I started on the circuit, but I’m glad that I’ve moved to the professional level—it’s so much more challenging.”

  “You worked fuckin’ hard to get where you are, Duchess. Changing the subject, I wanna take you out to dinner after you finish with Odysseus. We’re in a city that never fuckin’ shuts down, so I made reservations at some fancy-ass restaurant—cloth napkins and all that bullshit. For a second there, I thought your family was gonna blow my plans to hell.”

  Maggie paused as she tied Odysseus’s harness to the tethers on either side of the box stall to wash him with soap and water. She tilted her head to one side, enjoying the image that popped into her brain.

  “Dress pants and button-down shirt, big guy, or it’s no deal. Do still want to take me?”

  “Are you kidding? Wild horses couldn’t fuckin’ drag me away.” Flux smirked and grabbed her ass as he brushed his lips across hers. “With the expectation that you get slutted up for me too.”

  “Nope, just a brown burlap sack for you.” Maggie giggled and covered her mouth, looking up and then down, suddenly feeling shy. “It’s all coming together, isn’t it?”

  The soft words made Flux take a few steps closer to her as he put her head against his chest and cradled the back of her neck with his palm. His other arm rested tightly along her waist, encircling her protectively.

  “A lot of it is, yeah. Shit, I still can’t believe this happened. I never thought I’d fall in love again. I just figured I’d spend the rest of my life like some goddamn zombie.” Flux kissed the top of her head. “But it’s real, and you Duchess … you’re everything.”

  Maggie’s legs went to mush as she melted into
him, and his strong arm held her up. No one had ever said anything so romantic to her, and the fact that the words came from a brash, tough-as-nails, tattooed biker whom she was proud to call her man, made his sentiment even more special.

  “Right back at you, big guy. I can’t begin to imagine a life without you in it.”

  Flux grunted and squeezed her even tighter and she closed her eyes, listening to the pounding rhythm of his heartbeat against her ear.

  “Are you scared too?” she asked softly, playing with the fabric of his T-shirt at the back of his pants. “Of all this love stuff?”

  “Duchess, I’ve never been so terrified in my whole fuckin’ life. But it’s worth it. You’re worth it.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  Flux

  The guy in the overpriced penguin suit brought out the restaurant’s twentieth bottle of red wine and held it out for Flux to examine the pretty label—as if he knew what the fuck he was doing in a fancy joint like this one. Still, he looked over at Maggie with a half-smile, and nodded toward the wine dude.

  “It’s cool.”

  The waiter poured a small amount in Flux’s glass and he threw it back like it was a shot of whiskey. The stuff still burned, so it was really all the same to him, but Maggie glowed across the table from him as she sipped from her glass.

  “More, sir?”

  Flux inclined his glass out with a muttered thanks, unable to take his eyes off his woman. Fuck, she was every inch of beauty, sexiness, and sass. The mystery was how the hell he’d gotten so lucky to have Maggie in his life. He took a slower sip of wine then put the glass on the table. Maggie’s eyes connected with his and she smiled as a light flush swept across her face.

  “Would you like to order, sir?” the young man asked.

  “Filet mignon—princess cut, medium rare—for the lady. A porterhouse—rare—for me. Bring me a loaded baked potato, a salad with Italian dressing for my woman, and those fried up mushrooms for both of us.”

  The waiter tipped his head, then walked away, and Flux sat back in the high-backed red leather chair to admire his woman.

  “What?” Maggie asked. The corners of her mouth lifted up into a smile as she wrapped a strand of blonde hair around her finger. “You’ve been drooling over me since we got here.”

  “Can you blame me?” Flux fiddled with the pile of cutlery in front and to the side of his plate. “I’m not made for this kind of thing, but you? You shine like a fucking diamond, and it’s an intoxicating sight, Duchess.” He steepled his fingertips together with a wry grin.

  “You’re breaking out the big words tonight, huh?” Maggie teased, shifting in her chair before taking a big gulp of wine.

  Flux couldn’t help the loud guffaw that popped out of his mouth. He’d picked the best steakhouse in town for their celebration, and Maggie looked every inch his queen in her slinky, tight black dress and fuck-me heels. He didn’t know anything more complicated than that about women’s clothing, but she looked damn hot.

  “Your food is on its way,” the waiter chimed in as he wiped a single bread crumb off the tablecloth. “Please enjoy, compliments of the chef.”

  Another penguin-suited guy set down a tiny plate with a mini spoon in the center of the table. Flux jerked his head back and stared. What the fuck is this? It resembled gruel and had a bunch of herbs piled on top of it. He blinked and watched his woman dig into the small portion, tipping it back so it slid down her throat like a shot of booze.

  “Mmm,” she moaned. “That’s delicious. Are there cooked scallions in it?”

  “You have a refined palette.” The food nerd grinned in approval.

  She actually likes this shit. If that asshole keeps bonding with her over the food, I’m gonna stuff this shit down his fuckin’ throat. Flux sat straighter in the chair, his muscles stiffening. Why the hell did he think stuffy and pompous was the way to go that night? A muscle worked in his jaw as his narrowed eyes fixed on the asshole who was still talking about the damn slop on the miniature plate. Hell, Duchess and he should be drinking a beer in a bar, halfway to taking off each other’s clothes in the bathroom. Instead, he was keeping his anger in check as the damn waiter yakked like a fuckin’ pussy about recipes. Flux leaned forward and Maggie glanced at him and her eyes caught the reflection of the chandelier and sparkled. Damn, she’s beautiful. I’m glad as fuck that I took her to this fancy-ass place.

  The scent of her spicy perfume wafted around him, and he hooked his finger under her chin and leaned over and pressed his lips against hers. From the corner of his eyes, Flux saw the waiter step away and disappear from view and satisfaction mixed with desire coursed through him. Maggie tasted like wine and basil, and he wove his fingers into her hair and deepened the kiss. A small moan spilled from her lips and it took all his willpower to pull away when the waiter returned with their food. Winking at her, Flux settled back in his seat, his gaze never leaving hers.

  As he dug into his dinner, he was acutely aware of Maggie staring at him.

  “What? Do I have sauce on my chin, Duchess?”

  “No, nothing like that.” Maggie wiped the corners of her mouth with a napkin.

  “Then what?” Flux took a gulp of red wine.

  She reached over and brushed her fingers across his hand. “It’s just that no man has ever treated me this way. I’m pretty sure you’d rather be sloshing down beer, but you’re here for me. You’re a generous and wonderful man. Thank you, Flux.”

  Flux glanced away as he shifted in the chair. In his world, he gave out the compliments to women, not the other way around unless it had to do with his sexual performance. He cleared his throat and looked back at her. “So, you’re assuming I’m paying the check?” He deadpanned with a feigned wince. “As I remember it, you’re the one with the giant rodeo winnings.”

  Softness spread over Maggie’s face and she placed her hand over his and squeezed it lightly. “I love you.” Picking up the wine glass, she took a sip, her gaze still locked on his.

  “Me too, Duchess. I’m so damn proud of you.” Flux swallowed through the tightness in his throat and undid one of the top buttons of his shirt. “You’re really something. I knew you’d kick all the other competitors’ fuckin’ asses, but what really blows me the hell away is your tenacity. You’re amazing, woman.”

  “You’re not too shabby yourself, big guy.”

  “Now, I didn’t say what I did to get you to tell me how great I am.”

  “I know, but it doesn’t mean you aren’t.” Maggie popped a piece of steak in her mouth and chewed.

  But something was bothering him. Something that had hit a nerve and he couldn’t iron it out in his head. Now wasn’t the time though, it was too perfect to ruin everything. This was Duchess’s night, and he’d be an asshole for spoiling it. So they got through some chocolate dessert thing he couldn’t pronounce, another bottle of wine, and then they were in a taxi—back to their lavish hotel suite on the Strip.

  Flux slid the to-go box into the mini fridge and stood up, looking out at the sight laid out in front of him. Maggie leaned against the balcony railing, and the glaring lights of Vegas backdropped her curves as if she were a forbidden angel hellbent on sin. Without making a sound, he snuck up behind her and fit his front to her luscious ass and wrapped his arms around her waist. She leaned back into him with a contented sigh and a little wiggle that instantly woke up his dick.

  “Duchess, I’ve been thinking about things …” Flux had to stop a beat as he cleared his throat, unsure how Maggie would react to what he was going to say. “I need you to know something.”

  He could feel her tense against him as she turned in his arms and looked up into his face. Concern whispered across her brow.

  “What is it?” she asked in a barely audible voice.

  Flux groped with the words and Maggie stayed still in his arms watching him. Fuck it! He quirked his lips and let it fly out.

  “I’ve been thinking long and hard since I spent some time with my brothers. I’ve
come to the realization that I don’t wanna be a nomad anymore.” Flux scrubbed his fist against his face. “I wanna be back home again in the MC where I belong. For so long I’ve been riding and dodging the fuckin’ memories, but I’m done with the solitary life.” He ran his hands up and down her back. “You made me see that traveling through life alone isn’t the way I wanna go. It’s not like the memories and the guilt won’t be there anymore, because I know they’ll always be a part of me. But … I can deal with them better, now that I have you in my life. Duchess, you bring out parts of me that I thought died a long time ago. I miss the lifestyle I fell in love with a long time ago, and I’m itching to be active again with the Insurgents. And it’s all because I fell in love with a sassy, beautiful, sexy barrel racer. Life is fuckin’ wonderful sometimes.” He dipped his head down and captured her lips.

  Maggie looped her arms around his neck and pressed closer to him. After several heartbeats, she pulled away. “And?” Maggie’s voice hitched.

  Flux thought his chest would crack in half watching her blink away the tears pooling in her eyes. He shrugged and shook his head.

  “And I don’t know where that leaves us, Duchess. I wanna go back to Pinewood Springs and the Insurgents. That means being a full-time patched member again, but you’ve got a whole future staring you in the damn face. What the hell kind of man would I be to ask you to give that up? I wouldn’t … I couldn’t. I’ve got a shitload of flaws, but I’m not that fucking selfish. I was once, with Alicia, but …” Flux’s voice trailed off and the day he got patched in flashed through his mind replete with Alicia’s proud, smiling face. He jerked his head back and the lights of the Strip sparkled in front of him. He stared into Maggie’s blue orbs. “I won’t be that selfish again.” He gipped her shoulders hard. Fuck, I don’t wanna loose her.

  Flux tried to pull away but Maggie held on to him something fierce. She blinked a few times and licked her lips. Damn. He couldn’t even look at her as his stomach tightened into knots. He looked out into the distance and watched the procession of headlights on the Strip as tail lights snaked their way down the boulevard—cars bumper to bumper.