Why Me? : A Possessive High School Romance (Young Adult Version)

by Silva Hart

  I shrug. Hell if I know.

  “How long have you two been seeing each other?”

  Why does she keep insisting Lexi and I are a couple? “That’s the thing. We didn’t say two words to each other before last Thursday.”

  “What happened last Thursday?”

  What did happen? I’m still not sure. Did I want her or did she bewitch me? The whole thing is becoming a blur and gets fuzzier the more times Lexi and I talk.

  “You don’t have to answer that,” Anna says, looking out her window.

  I feel like I should but am simultaneously relieved at being let off the hook. “You want to get some ice cream?” Even though we didn’t talk a whole lot, that was nice last time.

  She wraps her arms around herself. “No, I feel like I’m always so cold here. I can’t get warm.”

  Okay, strike one. “Some coffee then?”

  “I don’t like coffee. This is good. Driving is good. Anything to not be at home. My mom is so damn depressed.”

  I think of my mom sitting around in her ratty bathrobe all day until her night shift at the diner. She never seemed happy. Was she depressed? I don’t know. We never talked all that much. She’d just sit on the couch and stare at the TV with Tony drinking by her side.

  It’s dark by the time I drop Anna off at her house. The only light is the flicker of a television on the curtains. She puts her hand on the door handle and sighs, staring at the plain brick ranch house. “God, I hate it here,” she mutters before pushing the door open and getting out.

  Thursday morning, Anna drags herself in looking as if she didn’t get any sleep. She only gives me a nod before going to her seat. I feel bad for her as I continue my vampire etching on the desk.

  After homeroom, Lexi pounces on me. The new normal. “I know you said you didn’t want to come to my house to tutor me in math, but I could really use some help with it. You have a lot of study halls, right?” She gazes up at me with innocent eyes, as if she hasn’t somehow tracked down my entire class schedule and memorized it already.

  I nod.

  “Would you do that, Jett? Would you tutor me? We could meet in the library.” She bites her lip. “Or wherever you want.”

  “Sure, why not?”

  She claps her hands together. “Oh my God, Jett. Thank you. There’s a private room for tutoring by the checkout desk. Want to meet there sixth period?”

  I nod.

  She gives me a smile that could cure cancer before going into her classroom.

  Later, in English class, Mrs. Kroft has us make a list of what would change in The Outsiders if it was set in our time. I’m kind of interested in that so start working on it. She comes over and presses her thigh against me ever so subtly as she asks if I have any questions.

  I lean back. “I am curious about something.”

  Her tongue darts out, wetting her lips.

  “That teacher guy, Jerry Wood, seemed to like the bad boys. As a modern-day teacher, do you like bad boys?” My voice is low, and I swear her body goes rigid.

  “Much like Jerry, I don’t think it’s fair to apply labels.” She gives me a lingering look before continuing up the aisle.

  At lunch, I go to the dugout but Anna’s not there. I remember how bad she looked in homeroom. What’s going on with her? Is her mom really that bad? I think I’d take a depressed Tony over a drunk, abusive Tony any day of the week.

  Anna arrives ten minutes before the bell. She accepts the proffered cigarette, takes a drag, then crushes the heels of her hands into her eyes. “God, I’m so tired.”

  “Where were you?” Okay, so it’s none of my business, but I care about her.

  “I was talking to Grant and Carlton.”

  Although I’m curious, what they were talking about is even less of my business so I don’t ask. What I do ask is, “You like those guys?”

  “They’re okay. They kept trying to show off and impress me, but they’re not really my type.”

  This is interesting. “What’s your type?”

  She gazes across the baseball diamond with a distant look, and I know she must be thinking of Connor back in California. “I tend to go for older.”

  Seriously? I wasn’t expecting that.

  “You know, someone who’s out in life doing his thing and making money, earning a living doing what he loves. It’s nice to be with someone who has his own place. High school boys are so immature with their constant ‘that’s-what-she-said’ jokes and always having to one up each other. I like someone who’s more secure, who knows what he wants then goes out and gets it.”

  I think I might meet that description, but then again maybe not.

  She takes a drag then exhales. “I like artists, people who can express themselves and are creative. Stuffy, uptight guys are the worst.”

  Well, I’m no artist, but I’m not stuffy either. “I think you left some stuff out.”

  She turns to me. “I did?”

  “Yeah, the strong, silent, slightly brooding boxer type who has a cool car and provides cigarettes.” Her laugh makes it worth the discomfort of putting myself out there. She obviously still has the hots for her ex, so why am I even still trying? This isn’t like me.

  “How did I forget that?”

  I take this as a positive sign.

  Chapter 14

  Sixth period, I forego basketball and wonder how disappointed Mrs. Kroft will be. Stepping into the library feels strange. I can’t remember the last time I was in here. I like the smell of the books though and how everyone is speaking in hushed tones.

  Everyone, that is, except for the librarian. God, her voice could snap a branch in half. I consider asking her to keep her voice down, but Lexi is waving at me from the doorway of a room to the right of the checkout desk.

  I stroll over to her, and she shuts the door behind us. The room feels like a jail cell. The only window is a square the size of my hand in the door. It’s probably there so the loud librarian can keep an eye on us.

  Lexi gets her math book and folder out of her backpack and puts them on the desk. She produces a stapled worksheet packet and plops it in front of me. “This is in a foreign language or something.”

  It’s clear to me. I talk her through the differences between exponents, powers, degrees, and integers as she listens with rapt attention. She’s looking at me with open admiration, as if she fully expects that I could walk on water if I wanted to, and I have to admit it feels kind of nice.

  Her blue eyes scan my face while her cascading golden hair brushes against my arm, and my thoughts are crashing into each other and getting tangled up. As if sensing this, she licks her lips. Seeing that pink tongue dart out between those sensuous lips–lips I’ve tasted more than once–causes me to falter altogether.

  She smiles and brushes my hair from my eyes. “You need a haircut. How can you see to fight with this hanging in your eyes?” She trails a finger behind my ear, caressing the lobe.

  “I manage.”

  “I still want to watch you.”

  I try to get back to the math, but she rests a hand on my knee. The librarian glances in at us, but we ignore her and she continues on.

  Lexi’s hand slides higher. God, this girl knows what to do. She leans against me as we bend over the problems. I can smell that vanilla perfume that makes my head spin. She must have noticed how much I like it.

  Dropping the pencil–to hell with the schoolwork–my hand caresses her firm thigh. She presses against me even more. I’m just about to lean in for a full-on make-out session when the door bursts open and the librarian barks, “Hands where I can see them.”

  I give her an exasperated look but slowly withdraw my hand from under the table and stick my forefinger in my mouth. The librarian’s mouth opens and shuts before she manages, “This door needs to stay open.”

  Withdrawing the finger with a soft pop, I say, “Whatever.”

  She leaves and Lexi bursts into giggles, collapsing against me. “Did you see her face?”

&nbs
p; I can’t help but smile. “Yeah. That lady needs to get laid. Not that I would do it for her.”

  Lexi laughs louder. “You are so bad, Jett.”

  Carlton walks up to the checkout desk with some books and sees us pressed against each other in the tiny room. His eyes narrow for an instant then his face smooths into a practiced smile and he comes to stand in the doorway. “Hey, Lexi. What are you up to?”

  “Studying.”

  He looks at the book. “Algebra? You good at that too? That’s my best subject.”

  Of course he assumes that she’s helping me and not the other way around. Poor must equal stupid in his mind. My fists clench under the table. How does he manage to rub me so wrong every single time he opens his mouth?

  “No, I suck at it. Jett’s helping me.”

  Carlton’s eyes widen, and he glances at me. “Eh, it’s probably not that important anyway. I mean, what are you ever going to need algebra for.”

  “I need it to become a doctor.”

  “A doctor? No shit. What kind?” he asks.

  “Pediatrician.”

  “That’s cool. I can see you doing that. I’m heading to law school or going into politics. Haven’t decided.”

  Yeah, both of those pretty much suit him perfectly.

  “How ‘bout you, Dixon? What are you doing after graduation?” His tone is casual, conversational, but I can tell he’s doing it to prove a point in front of Lexi.

  “Probably what I usually do.”

  “Yeah?” He leans in like a cat that’s cornered a mouse.

  “Yeah, your mom.”

  Lexi bursts out laughing as Carlton’s grin transforms to a glower. “Fuck you, Dixon.”

  “Language, Mr. Galloway,” the librarian scolds.

  Now it’s my turn to grin as Lexi shoves her things into her backpack.

  “Come on, Lexi. We better get to history,” Carlton says, waiting to walk with her.

  “Thanks, Jett, that helped,” Lexi says. “I’ll probably need help again soon. Maybe we can find somewhere better.” She gives me a wink that Carlton can’t see.

  The two golden heads stroll off together.

  God, I hate that guy. We were having a good time before he came along and ruined it. But it’s interesting that Lexi wants to be a pediatrician. Little Miss Doctor Wannabe must be getting her last rebellious kicks in during high school by hanging out with me before she graduates into a responsible member of upper crust society.

  After school, I pass Anna standing in front of the doors. I guess I’d gotten used to seeing her waiting by the Mustang.

  “Hey.”

  “Hey,” she says.

  I’m confused. Why isn’t she going with me to my car? “You want a ride?”

  “Nah, I’m waiting for Grant. I’m going to the movies with him, remember?”

  Oh, right. I keep forgetting about that. Mostly because it seems so weird that she actually wants to hang out with those douchebags. She said she doesn’t like stuffy, and they’re about as wound-tight as you can get, so why is she spending time with them?

  “He wants to go out to eat before it starts.”

  Eating takes four hours? Maybe they’re hitting the matinee. “What are you seeing?”

  “Kissing Kandy.”

  “Really? That’s what he wants to see?”

  She shrugs. “I don’t really care what we see. I just want to get out of the house.”

  I’m seriously kicking myself for not having thought of the movie idea first.

  At the gym, I take my frustrations out on the heavy bag. One-Eyed Mike notices. Of course he does. “Hey, Jett. Come on over here and spar with Dair.”

  I walk to the raised ring and hop onto the platform.

  “Hey,” Dair says. “You meet Mia yet?”

  “No.”

  “Okay good.”

  One-Eyed Mike says, “Dair here has picked up some bad habits along the way that he needs to unlearn.”

  We square off.

  “You’re only using jabs in this one and taking it easy. This is all about the footwork. I want to see slipping and ducking. No flat feet.”

  We nod.

  One-Eyed Mike clicks his stopwatch. “Go.”

  Dair’s fists are fast but his feet not so much. With him acting as if they’re are encased in concrete, it’s easy to stay outside of his flying fists.

  “Move those feet,” One-Eyed Mike barks.

  Dair obeys but drops his guard. I pop him lightly in the jaw to get the point across. His lips tighten.

  “Keep moving,” One-Eyed Mike orders.

  The same thing happens. When Dair’s feet move, his hands go down. My glove lands on his shoulder.

  “All right. All right. Stop. Dair, go grab a jump rope. Thanks, Jett.”

  I nod. I’m ducking through the ropes when Ivan comes up to me and rumbles, “Want to spar?”

  “Sure, why not?”

  We grab helmets and our mouth guards. Neither of us will go easy on the other. While One-Eyed Mike spurs Dair to jump faster on the other side of the room, Ivan and I begin circling each other in the ring. I’m tall, but he’s got at least three inches on me.

  He jabs and I duck and slide and land an upper-cut on his ribs. The mirth in his eyes goes cold. A right cross catches my helmet, and I step back. We circle. He comes at me with a series of jabs. I slip under them until a right jab lands on the cushion by my ear. My head snaps, and I land on the ropes.

  Ivan moves in, but I slide out from under him and give his solid torso a left hook. He whirls to track me, unleashing another series of jabs I’m able to evade. This time, I’m ready for his cross and dodge with an upper-cut to his jaw.

  We both have stamina and continue dancing and exchanging punches until both of our chests are heaving and we’re dripping with sweat. This is exactly what I needed. Focusing so intensely on Ivan’s next move has made me forget all about Anna’s date with Grant. This realization no sooner sets in than Ivan catches me full on with a left cross that sends me to the mat. We remove our helmets and mouth guards.

  “You got distracted, kid. I could see it in your eyes. What happened?”

  I shake sweat and hair out of my eyes but don’t answer.

  “You got girl problems? Come on, you can talk to Ivan.”

  I exhale a laugh.

  “Ah, see there? Ivan knows girl problems.”

  “Who is this Ivan and what girl problems does he have?”

  He laughs his deep, booming laugh. “Ivan has no girl. That is his problem.”

  “I don’t know. No girl doesn’t sound like a problem right about now.”

  “That’s because you’ve never suffered from that problem.”

  He has me there. Not that I’ve actually ever had a steady girlfriend, but I’ve definitely never had any shortage of anything anytime I wanted it. Women can’t seem to keep their pants on around me. Women, that is, except for Anna. She may have given it to me once, but ever since then she’s acted as if we’re just friends. I thought I’d helped her, made her forget about California, but now I’m pretty sure I wasn’t even close to doing that.

  Whatever. If she wants a rich dick like Grant, that’s what she deserves. I thought she was different.

  I get a shower then discover I’m out of smokes. Getting in the Mustang, I head to the corner Quickie Mart. I buy a pack, get back in the car, and am tamping them down when a red Miata pulls into the parking lot. It’s Grant.

  Anna gets out of the car and goes into the store. After a few minutes, she comes out empty-handed and goes to Grant’s window. I crack mine, so I can hear what she’s saying.

  “Hey, I’m just going to walk it from here, okay?”

  “What? No. We’re going to The Overlook.”

  “Nah, I’m good.”

  He gets out, and she backs up crossing her arms. He towers over her. “Just get in the car, Anna.”

  “You’re drunk.”

  “I’m not that drunk. And you didn’t seem to mind me h
aving a flask in the movie theater.”

  “I don’t want to be in the car anymore, okay? Just go home.”

  “I thought we were going to The Overlook.”

  “I don’t feel like it anymore.”

  “Why not? What changed all of a sudden?”

  “I just don’t want to. It doesn’t need to be a big deal.”

  “I’m not leaving you here.”

  “It’s fine.”

  “No, it’s not. Get in the car.”

  “No.” She stares up at him, unwavering.

  His jaw clenches. “Just get in.”

  “No.”

  “God, why are you being like this?”

  “Why are you being like this?”

  “I really want to go to The Overlook with you. We’ve been talking about it all night. Come on, I’ll make it worth your while,” he wheedles.

  He steps forward and tries to put his arms around her, but she steps back. He grabs for her more forcefully.

  “Stop! You’re being an asshole. Just go home and sleep it off.”

  He stops and stares down at her, a scowl darkening his face. “Carlton was right. You’re nothing but a tease.”

  The crack of her palm against his cheek rolls across the parking lot like a thunder-clap.

  “You bitch.” He grabs for her again.

  I’m out of the car and by Grant’s side in a flash. Grabbing his arm and spinning him, I punch the surprise off his face. He falls against his car, blood welling at the corner of his mouth.

  “Dixon,” he spits and launches at me.

  I duck under his swinging arm and throw a left hook into his gut, pivoting all my weight behind it. He doubles over and collapses at Anna’s feet, clutching his stomach, red-faced, coughing, eyes bulging.

  She stares down at him, a triumphant gleam in her eyes. “Don’t call me a bitch.”

  Chapter 15

  “Thanks,” she says after we’re buckled into the Mustang. “I was thinking I could run into the store if things got too ugly but wasn’t sure what was going to happen after that.”

  “No problem. Glad I was here.”

  She takes two cigarettes out of my pack without asking and lights them with shaking hands then gives one to me.