A Siren's Melody (Unexpected Love Book 2)
Page 13
There was no sign of the usual mischievous look on his face. Even when he looked up at her smiling face, he did not grin nor smirk as she had expected.
“Have a seat, Lady Isabella,” he said seriously. “There is something you need to know about my brother.”
The smile dropped from her face when she realized he was here to deliver bad news. He never called her by her name before. Instead of sitting down as he had asked her, she grabbed the nearby bedpost, preparing herself to hear the terrible news he had brought.
“What happened to him?” she asked. “Tell me nothing terrible has befallen him.”
She was close to tears. She knew something dreadful had happened and he was here to deliver the grave news. When he looked at her, pain and anguish were evident in his eyes. She knew it was a mistake to let him continue the pursuit of a dangerous person. She should have forbidden him from going after the dangerous criminal when he had asked her permission for one last case to solve.
“He is fine, Lady Isabella,” he said. “Please, sit with me.”
If nothing awful had happened to him then nothing else mattered to her. She could deal with any hardship except seeing him in pain. He might be strong enough to endure pain, but she was not strong enough to watch him suffering.
She dragged the chair opposite him and sat with grace on the seat, giving him her undivided attention. She stayed silent while he tried to make up his mind. He was seeking the word that would begin what he had to say, but every word in the dictionary seemed to be alluding him. It was the first time she had to witness him in such a distressed state.
“Do you know how our father died?” he asked.
If he had come to tell her about the gruesome murder of their father, he had wasted a trip. Russell had told her in vivid details the events of that unfortunate night. She leaned back in the seat, releasing the breath she had been holding. He had come all this way for naught.
“He was killed while trying to save your brother,” she said. “He told me what happened that night.”
He nodded his head, already suspecting her answer, which meant this was not the reason for his visit. It was just the opening lines he was using for something else he had to share. The feeling of uneasiness returned, and she was once again holding her breath, waiting for the next words from his mouth. There was a nagging feeling in the back of her head that once he left her room, nothing would remain the same. A major catastrophe was waiting for her at the end of their meeting.
“I was there too. I witnessed the whole event from a corner of the stable,” he said, eyes fixed on the brandy in his glass. “I saw the man who attacked my brother and then the other man who saved my brother by killing his attackers.”
From what she understood from Russell’s side of the story, he was unaware that his brother had witnessed everything. Russell was also unaware that someone else other than his father had come to his aid. She was grateful to the faceless man who saved him from becoming the target of brutality at the hands of those heartless criminals.
“He does not like human contact due to that incident,” she remarked. “They had traumatized him for life.”
The people who tried to abuse him that night were the worst kind of humans. She understood the desire for hurting a woman, but a child was a symbol of purity and innocence. How can someone stoop so low as to crush those little flowers? If people had started to hurt small children, then surely the world was near its doom.
“If all that had happened when he was older then there was a chance that it might not have affected him so severely, but he was a child back then, plus the brutal murder of our father before his eyes had already put him in shock. The same hands that murdered our father were too much for him when they touched him.”
She was crying in earnest, imagining a small child trying to evade the murderer of his father. The child had just witnessed his father’s murder. He did not get the chance to grieve before running for his own life. What sort of hell had that child endured while witnessing a loving father being butchered at the hands of the men who had come to harm him?
“The man who saved my brother, I know his identity,” Shane said before she could open her mouth. He looked her straight in the eyes. “I saw the same man a few weeks ago. He was escorting you to the carriage after our encounter in the alleyway.”
It took her a while to connect the dots. Shane was saying that the man who saved his brother was none other than her servant, Philip. This news was a cause of rejoicing for her, but Shane was still looking at her in a way one looks at a person with a contagious disease. He was not done yet. This was not the news he had come to impart. Something terrible was in store for her.
“Philip saved him,” she said hesitantly. “Why are you telling me this now? Surely, you knew that when you first saw him with me.”
She did not like the direction in which their conversation was headed. Sadness and grief were evident on Shane’s face. He was here to tell her something that would destroy her whole future. By the end of this conversation, her future filled with bliss and happiness would be reduced to ashes.
Shane leaned back in the chair, sighing deeply and staring at the ceiling. He did not look happy to be the bearer of the unhappy news either, but his love for his brother was compelling him to take drastic measures to secure his brother’s future.
“I did, and I was happy about it too. It seemed like a fairytale to me,” he said, chuckling humorlessly. “My brother was falling in love with a girl who was raised by his savior. A perfect ending for someone who had been hurting for this long.”
She was waiting for him to continue, but his mind had gone elsewhere. He was staring at the ceiling, seeking answers for the questions that were not there. She did not like the look of pure agony on his face. She had always seen him in a cheerful mood. His face devoid of the devil-may-care attitude was making her worried. Shane was the kind of person who made others laugh in the direst situations. He was practically a clown who came to this world with the only aim of making others laugh.
“What changed?” she asked.
She was afraid to know the answer to her own question. She wished time would stand still in this moment and spare her from hearing the words that would change the whole course of her life. She did not want to know the reason for his presence but could not go on without getting the answers either. Otherwise, for the rest of her life, she would remain on edge, waiting for the anvil to fall on her head.
“I unearthed the identity of the attacker as well,” he said, pausing for a second, the words too much for him too. “Your father molested my brother and murdered our father.”
Her whole world came to a screeching halt. The father she had desperately wanted to know was the same monster who had destroyed the lives of innocent children. She had cursed the monster, not knowing she was cursing her own father. She was the daughter of the person who ruined the life of the man she was deeply in love with. She was at a crossroads at that moment. Where would her life go after this? If Russell became aware of her connection to his father’s murderer, he would leave her.
“No, this is not possible,” she said tearfully.
She knew he was telling the truth, but her heart was desperate to hear something that would not result in the downfall of the castle she had built in her head. She had never known love and affection until he came into her life, and now all that was at stake.
Shane looked at her with pity. He was aware of the conflict brewing inside her. He understood her pain but did not want to give her false hope. He had witnessed his brother in pain for a long time. If Shane believed even for a moment that her association with that man would not bring horrible memories back in his brother’s life, he would have kept his mouth shut for the rest of his life.
“Ask your loyal servant about your father’s death. He might give you answers that I am unable to.”
Philip would definitely know the answer to her every question and so would her mother. They were always whispering in a
corner, sharing words that no one else could ever know. If Philip had a hand in her father’s death, then her mother would know about it too. She could confront her mother this very instant, but there was still a small doubt remaining in her mind. There was a possibility that Philip might have acted alone.
“What do you want me to do with this information?” she asked.
At the moment, she had to know the hidden message in Shane’s words. He had come all this way to ask her something. She was not sure if she wanted to know the answer, but she had no power over someone else’s mind. Shane would speak his mind whether she wanted to hear him or not.
“I wanted to look for our birth parents, but he had no interest in finding the identity of them. For him, his parents died that night,” Shane said. “Do you know what will happen when he finds out about all this?”
She knew that Russell loved the man who raised him. The way he talked about his father left no argument as to where his loyalties stood. He cared for his adopted parent more than he gave a damn about his birth parents. In the park, he had mentioned that the stranger was far better than the people who left him on the church steps, abandoned and alone. The people who did not care about whether he lived or died were of no import to him.
“You want me to break his heart?” she asked.
She wished her assumption were wrong. She wished Shane would assure her that she did not have to go to such lengths, but it was too good to be true. Russell would eventually find out the truth and then he would hate her for who she is. He would despise her for the rest of her life, knowing full well that in her veins the blood of his father’s murderer ran. She would have never guessed that she would be so unfortunate in the field of love.
“I am sure you understand my reasons. I have no intention of causing harm to either of you, but I care for my brother more than I care for anyone else in the world. I cannot see him reliving his nightmares again. It took him a long time to forget about that night. He used to scream in the middle of the night, calling for our father. We looked the same, but somehow, our father recognized us. He loved him more than he loved me. He was his special boy.”
She would have never guessed that this day would bring so much grief into her life. She was sitting before a loving brother who would go so far as to break his brother’s heart with the only purpose of saving him from finding out that he was involved with the daughter of his father’s murderer. It was the single most unfair thing life could throw her way. If she knew her father was a murderer, she would have never wished for knowing him. She would have buried even the small memory she had in a far corner of her mind.
“He might not fall into the same abyss again,” she said, lips quivering.
Shane got a wounded expression on his face. He was aware that she did not believe for a second that it would not affect Russell. She was trying to convince herself more than she was trying to change Shane’s mind. She knew full well that Russell would never remain the same if he became aware that he had been loving a person who was a direct descendant of a murderer and a child molester.
“I wish it was true, Sister. I truly do, but you and I both know it is just a dream.”
The only comfort in that statement was the assurance that he considered her a sister. His loyalties to his brother were on one side, but his respect towards her was something he was not faking. Even after knowing that she was connected to an abuser, he was still giving her respect. He respected her well enough to not lie to her and give her false hope for their future. He was blunt about his demands, but there was no malice behind his intent.
“I am not strong enough to let him go.”
He was asking too much of her. Russell was everything to her. Every waking hour of her life was filled with thoughts of him. How can she just let him go when he was the only person who made her heart beat fast? How can anyone forget about their one true love? Some people might be strong enough to forget the only person who brought happiness to their lives, but she was not among those fortunate people. She would never be able to forget him. She would do whatever was best for his peace of mind, but she would never be happy about it.
“You will if you truly love him,” he said softly.
Shane was not meeting her eyes. He knew she truly loved him, and his accusation was hurtful, but he was desperate to convince her. His brother’s future depended on her decision. Shane had witnessed his brother in pain. He had seen him struggling with the nightmares and the traumatic memories. It took his brother a long time to have some semblance of peace in life. Shane did not believe that another visit down memory lane would be good for Russell.
“This is not fair, you know I love him,” she said in a breaking voice.
Shane stood up from his chair, rounded the table between them and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. She was crying like a babe while he offered his presence as a support. It was tough on both of them, but they were both doing this for the same person. They were both trying to save their loved one.
“I am here for you,” Shane said, kissing her head. “If you need anything, just send me a missive. I will try to make your every wish come true.”
It was such a noble offer, but the only wish she had was to marry Russell. That dream was so close to coming true but was being snatched away at the last minute. She was helpless to stop herself from drowning into despair, which was the only possible outcome if she severed her ties with Russell.
“The only thing I need is the one person I can never have.”
Shane rocked her in his arms, letting her weep for her lost love. She wished she had never played along with his game and come to meet him in her room. The people in the house were happy, thinking she was spending alone time with her intended, but none of them would ever know that she was crumbling down with grief in her room. She was in need of a shoulder to cry on and an ear to hear her sorrows, but she could never share her burden with anyone. She had to endure the pain in silence lest someone got wind of her father’s involvement in heinous crimes.
“Wipe your tears, Sister,” he said. “I know this is difficult for you, but you have to put on a mask for the world. The minute someone sees past that mask, they will feed on your grief.”
She pushed him away angrily. His face reminded him of the man she could never get. She knew he was trying to soothe her, but at the moment she needed an outlet for her rage. He had no right asking her to remain calm and put on a mask when all she wanted to do was scream at the world. Her tears were the only thing that was keeping her sane. If she wiped her tears, she would go mad. She was losing her love. She had the right to cry her heart out.
She had known Shane these past days and not once did she see him getting serious. He was nothing more than a prankster who was always interfering in others’ lives. He would never understand her pain. It was easy for him to tell her that she should put on a mask, but he could never realize the pain she was feeling at that moment.
“What do you know of grief and pain?” she snapped angrily. “You are just a clown who laughs all the time. Do you even know what it feels like to lose someone you love?”
Shane was visibly shaken by her words. Her words had struck him deeply. She saw a mask fall on his face, hiding the shock and hurt like he had asked her to do. He took a step back from her, leaving her to wallow in her misery all alone. He opened the door to her room, not giving a damn that the whole household could see him leaving her room. They were both aware that everyone was aware of his presence in her room so why keep the façade of fake modesty? He halted at the threshold, his eyes downcast and imparted his final words.
“I dress like him. I walk the same paths he does. I have devoted my whole life to him because I feel responsible for that night. I want to take his place when someone tries to harm him again. I have no desire to become a shadow to my brother, but I cannot stop my heart from feeling the unreasonable urge to protect him against all those who might harm him. I am not a clown. I feel your pain more than you realize. I have seen a cheer
ful brother become aloof and distant. I do not push him towards doing inane things because I am some sort of jester. I want to bring him back towards life, not let him become lost in his traumatizing past. I know what it feels like to lose a loved one, Lady Isabella because I have lost a very cheerful brother to a grief you cannot even imagine.”
At that moment, she realized he was not as heartless as she had imagined him. He felt pain like any other person. He was just good at hiding his true emotions behind a veil of humor and mockery. There was more to him than just a prankster who made fun of everyone and everything in his life. She pictured the little child who was being chased and then the other child who was watching everything from a corner. She had only thought about Russell’s pain so far, but Shane must be equally devastated. The feeling of helplessness and fright must have devastated him too. Russell had Shane to bring him out from his traumatizing past, but Shane had no one.
She called his name, but he did not stop to respond. He left her alone in her room with self-hatred and loathing. He had addressed her formally, severing the bond of being her brother. She heard his pain and hurt clear as day in his departing words. In her misguided attempt to make him feel her pain, she had lost his friendship.
When after an hour or so had passed and no one came to check on her, she became suspicious. If Shane’s identity were discovered, the whole house would have been in an uproar by now. Either he had left through a secret passage or he had somehow convinced everyone to leave her alone. The former case was a bit farfetched, but the latter was highly unlikely because Margaret could never be stopped even if she was held back by thick vines.
She was not aware of secret passageways in her house, but she had confidence in his skills. If he could enter her room without alerting everyone, he could leave the house in the same manner.
She wiped her tears and put on a mask as he had asked her. She put a radiant smile on her face and went out to face the world.