Bottomed Out

by Brooke May

  And as usual, my dad is standing at the door, opposite of the minister, greeting everyone.

  “Nolan. Jax.” In a rare instance, my dad smiles at the pair of us before turning his attention to Len. “And who do we have here?” I know he is a little taken aback by her appearance. She isn’t like the usual women to grace these halls, but my dad well good not to show his shock.

  “Dad, this is Lennox Austin, my girlfriend. Len, this is my dad, Joe Hunt.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Hunt.” Len enthusiastically takes my dad’s hand and shakes it with just as much vigor, showing her excitement. She may be thrilled to meet my family, but I’m a nervous fucking wreck now.

  Yes, I keep swearing in a church. It’s in my head. It isn’t like anyone else can hear me.

  “It’s nice to meet you, too, Lennox.”

  “Please call me Len.”

  “Len.” Dad nods, a genuine smile filling out his face for the time since Ruby’s birth. This gives me a little more hope that maybe this won’t be as bad as I thought it might. “I’ll see you guys in there.” Nodding in the direction of where we usually sit, we continue inside to get our coffee and then head off to our table.

  While Nolan continues with his hands filled with two cups, I detour us to go around the outside to come around and find my mom sitting at the table she rarely graces her presence at anymore.

  “Hi, Willa.” Nolan beams down at her before taking his seat on the other side.

  “Hi, Nolan.” That sweet voice of hers is one I have missed.

  “Mom,” I start and wait long enough for her to look in our direction. “This is Lennox Austin, my girlfriend.” Saying those sweet words will never get old. “Len, my mom, Willa.”

  “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Hunt.” Just as excited as she was with meeting my dad, she fills the seat between my mom and myself to meet her.

  “Hello, Lennox.” Mom’s face is stoic, but her voice feels warm. Len finds something to discuss with my sister and mom. I knew Josie and Len would get along wonderfully. And my mom doesn’t complain about her hair, tattoos, or piercings.

  And then it all goes to shit.

  “I saw Levi the other day,” Nolan, who just so happens to work for Levi’s dad, announces.

  “Oh, yeah?”

  “He said you were looking into quad racing.”

  And there goes the good mood as well as the hope.

  “What are you talking about, Nolan?”

  And off goes Mom.

  “I’ve been thinking about it.” I might as well commit to this. They will find out eventually. “I’ve been working out harder and looking into what I need to do.” I haven’t had a chance to talk to Len about this either even though I know she will fully support me.

  “You will do no such thing.” The chair flies out behind Mom as she abruptly stands. “You almost lost your life on the back of those stupid machines. No son of mine will do this again.”

  “I’m a grown man, Mother. I can do what I want and what makes me happy.”

  “And tearing this family apart makes you happy?” She sneers.

  “You’re the one who’s doing that. Can’t you just support me like you used to?” I don’t raise my voice, not here, and not anywhere.

  “You little—”

  “Willa, that is enough.” Dad stands just as quickly and pulls her away, leaving the rest of us reeling.

  Len laughs nervously, and Josie follows while Nolan scratches the back of his head, looking guilty. “Sorry, Jax.”

  “It’s okay, Nolan. She would have found out sooner or later.” Looking over at Len, I can’t help but smile at her grin.

  “That wasn’t too bad.” She comes over and leans against me. “She isn’t as bad as you make her out to be. She’s just hurting for her son.”

  “I wish she would be kinder about it.”

  “Give her some time. She may come around.” Kissing my cheek, she takes her seat again. “Now, tell us about your plans.”

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  As we drive away from the church, the van is filled with an eerie silence. The way Len slid off my concern about how my mom reacted is gone now, and she is somber.

  The closer we get to my apartment; I find myself drawn to take my eyes off the road if only for a split instance. And the last time that I do, I find her fists bunches on her lap, and her pristine white hands even more so while angry veins reveal themselves.

  “Is everything okay?” I thought she was okay with everything. I should have warned her a little better about how bad it has become with my mom.

  “No,” she bites out.

  I know what the issue is, but I ask anyway. “My mom bothered you more than you let on, didn’t she?”

  On a huff, Len turns in her seat the best she can with the seat belt. “Okay, I’m not trying to piss you off, but the lack of support your parents give you sets me off.”

  “How so?”

  “Jax, your mom was sweet enough to me, but she’s hurting so badly that she’s taking everything out on you instead of trying to talk to you.”

  “Yeah.” What else can I say? I already know all of this, so does the rest of my family.

  “Don’t just say ‘Yeah’, Jax.” She slaps her hand on the seat. “This isn’t right.”

  “I don’t know what to say to you, Len. I’ve numbed myself to all of it, but I am still holding onto hope that she will see through her bullshit sooner or later.”

  “And if that never happens?”

  “I …” Stopping, I let the lame excuse fall off my tongue and out of my mind. I always thought I would be able to get through to her eventually. I never allowed myself to think of what would happen if she never spoke to me again.

  She would never come to my wedding to walk next to me down the aisle or dance with me at my reception. She may not even come to the birth of any of my children.

  That guts me.

  “And your dad didn’t really do much to back you up,” she mutters.

  “He has to live with her and survive,” I respond quickly but not angrily. “My mom is difficult.”

  “Your dad still could have stood up for you.”

  “Like I said, he does what he has to in order to survive.” I can only shrug. “Anyway, I’m hoping to have a little intervention with her soon.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  “I’m in the process of tracking down footage of my wreck, and once I do, I’m going to force her to watch it. She isn’t exactly angry about me getting hurt, more worried on that part, but it is the fact that I’m still friends with Axle that bothers her.”

  “Why would that make her so angry?”

  “Because she thinks he’s to blame for my loss of the use of my legs. He isn’t, though. He was caught up in it just like I was.”

  “And finding footage to show her that will prove it?”

  “Yes, and then, hopefully, I’ll get my mom back.” I turn into my parking lot. “She really is a sweet woman under all those frustrating parts of her.”

  Silence envelops us, but my head is spinning now. It’s hard to explain to someone how my mom is when they didn’t know her before the accident. Levi understands the best. Axle a little less so, but he is still supportive.

  “Okay, I have my own questions now.”

  “All right.”

  “You’re getting upset because my dad doesn’t stand up for me, but why is it okay that you don’t stand up to your brother to live your own life?” Parking the van, I turn to look at her as I put it in park.

  “That’s entirely different,” she shoots out.

  “It is, but it isn’t,” I reply. This is not how I saw this day going, not after our amazing morning.

  “Your parents seem to ignore you.”

  “And Owen dictates you.”

  That was the wrong word. Len is out of the van and storming away from me far too quickly for my liking. There is no way I can catch her in time with how long it takes me to get out o
f the van. But once I’m out, I’m relieved to see her leaning against the front door.

  “I’m sorry, Len. That was out of line. I should know better than to say anything with how difficult my mom is with me.”

  Shaking her head, she releases her hold on her body and comes over to me, bracing her hands on both of my armrests. “Owen is as much of a touchy subject to me as your mom is for you.”

  “Agreed.”

  “Good.” Kissing me, she moves out of the way so I can unlock the door. Getting inside, I go to the kitchen to get us something to drink while also loosening my tie.

  “Is Axle home?” she calls from the living room.

  “In the evenings is when he is home the most. He’s been busy lately.”

  “Busy screwing my best friend’s brains out,” she mutters loud enough for me to hear, and I laugh.

  “He’s been in a better mood since she’s been bedding him.” I come back with water for both of us.

  “That’s what you’re calling it?” She snorts. “He only has a small range of emotions that bounce between broody and grumpy.”

  “You’ve figured him out pretty quickly.”

  “I deal with Paige every day.” Instead of settling onto the couch, Len makes herself at home on my lap. “I can read the best covered up emotions.”

  “Oh, really?” I finger the lapel of her halter top of her dress. My mind has completely shifted to something more intimate.

  “Yes,” she murmurs against my temple.

  “And what have you figured out about me?” My other hand begins the journey up her smooth leg and under her dress.

  And that’s as far as it goes.

  A loud, ear pumping knock bangs against the front door, halting Len’s answer and my travel, and it doesn’t stop.

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  “Is there a chance that Axle forgot his keys?” Len’s lips glide across my cheek, working her way up to my ear.

  If that were the case, he would have called my phone by now.

  The banging continues, growing louder and louder until it is nearly unbearable, and I’m certain my upstairs neighbors will call the cops or something if it doesn’t stop soon.

  “Not likely.” And I know better than to think it is Levi. Somehow that asshole managed to get his own key. I think it was from one drunken night when Axle passed out at his apartment. “And it isn’t Levi, either.” I doubt my sister or any other family member would be coming over this soon after church has ended.

  Unless it is your mom ready to make amends?

  I try not to snort at the thought. She wouldn’t be this loud.

  “Want me to see who it is?”

  Watching her right herself, I can’t help but trail down the length of her gorgeous body. The sharp, angular look of her face is a complete contrast to the softness of the dress. She’s the embodiment of a modern pin-up model I suddenly want inked on my back; her stunning face and amazing body taking up the entire part of blank canvas.

  She’s my perfect wet dream.

  “Jax?”

  “What?” Shaking my head, I dart my gaze back up to meet her concerned one.

  “The door?”

  “Oh, yeah.” Clearing my throat, I start to push myself closer to the entrance. “I have this. Just relax where you are.”

  Even though the living room is right there next to the door, the banging gets louder the closer I push myself until I’m sitting right on the other side of the crazy person knocking.

  For a moment as I’m reaching for the handle, I debate whether to grab my bat. I haven’t had use for it lately, not since the night some crazy asshole tried to break in, and Axle was sleeping so hard, I could have believed he was dead.

  Breaking my pause, I have a firm grip on the doorknob. The vibrations of the knocking echo up through my arm. It spikes my heart rate, taking my adrenaline up more than I’m comfortable with.

  Doing my best to pull the door open while maneuvering my chair, I come around the side of it only to come face to face with the fury that is Owen.

  Shit.

  Thoughts fly through my head as I stare at the angry man who still has his hand raised in the air as if he is going to continue to knock on my head rather than the door.

  What is he doing here?

  How did he find out where I live?

  Eyes widening, I realize that Len’s car is parked right next to my van.

  He must have seen it when he was leaving the gym.

  Since the gym isn’t too far from here, it isn’t out of the realm of possibilities that he drove past and just so happened to see his sister’s car and decided to figure out why. He has to know Paige well enough to realize she wouldn’t live here.

  “I know my sister is in there, dipshit,” he spits at me, finally breaking the tension-filled silence.

  I’ve never much cared for silence when it surrounds people I don’t know too well and me. It usually means they don’t know how to talk to me just because of my inability to walk, but with Owen, it is welcomed.

  “No, shit.” I can’t stop the words before they fall out. “What gave it away?”

  “Don’t be such a fucking prick.” We are still a good distance away from each other, but I can feel his spittle hitting my face. “I warned you to stay the hell away from her, jackass.” Trying to force his way into my house, he slams his chair against mine.

  For a split second, I feel as I should check to make sure neither one of my friends is anywhere near to videotape this since the pair of them seem to want to see a wheelchair duel, but the instant his chair hits mine again, I’m leaning forward and ready to slam my fist into his face.

  “You are not welcomed to enter my home.” Wedging myself in the doorway, I do my best to keep him from gaining entrance. Len is an adult who can make her own decisions, and she has decided to be with me. Nothing Owen can say or do will change that.

  “Get out of the fucking way and give me my sister. Lennox!” He rages. His larger body can look over my shoulder, but I’m not budging.

  Releasing one of my wheels, I draw my fist back. Now that he is close enough to me, I can easily plant my fist in the middle of his face.

  “Jax, don’t!” Len forces her way between us, paying no mind to her dress as she muscles her way closer to her brother than to me.

  It stings a little, but Owen is her brother, after all, so why shouldn’t she go to him over me?

  I would still like it to be me.

  Not many come to my side first these days.

  “Owen, what are you doing here?” Len doesn’t do a good job to mask her frustration at her brother finally figuring us out.

  “The question is what are you doing here?” he sneers, nostrils flaring in my direction as he pins me with another glare. I’m quivering in my seat.

  Note the hint of sarcasm?

  Yeah, it’s coming out in spades in my head as I watch the siblings interact. She is pacifying him as if he were some petulant child rather than a grown-ass man.

  “Owen, I was visiting with Jax here. He took me to check out his church. I think it is a place you would like. There is a wheelchair ram—”

  “I don’t give a flying fuck!” he screams in her face, continuing to act like the child he seems to have reverted to. “Get your things; you’re leaving now.” Shooting one more glare, he backs up and turns to head back to his vehicle.

  “Len?” Reaching out, I gently grab her hand and do my best to pull her back around to face me.

  “I’m sorry, Jax.” Her shoulders sag, and the vibrant light that was in there moments ago has been drained, leaving longing and sadness.

  “You’re allowed to live your own life.” My hold grows desperate even though I know I’ve lost her to her brother.

  “I know. I need to work some things out with Owen. I’ll tell him about us, and we’ll go from there.” Her words hold no merit to them. “I’ll talk to you later.” Bending down, she kisses me sweetly and far too shortly. “Bye, Jax.”

 
; Releasing me, she follows Owen down the path to the parking lot, leaving me behind. A mixture of frustration and bitterness beat against my chest, but I can’t bring myself to slam the door. I watch her walk away, taking my heart with her.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Two days after she walked away from me and straight to her brother’s unbending demands, her farewell continues to reverberate through my mostly empty skull.

  This is worse than her leaving me for another man.

  This is so much crueler than if she had just hopped onto the back of some other guy’s bike and left me in the dust. Her brother isn’t going to go anywhere. He is here to stay, and there is nothing I can do about it other than biting the fuck out of my tongue and deal with the fact that every time my girlfriend is with me, there will be a chance her brother will pull her away.

  Now that he knows where I live, nothing will keep him from beating down my door every time she is over at my place. I haven’t even seen them at the gym where I have been actively looking and nosing my way into asking the staff if they have seen Owen.

  None of them have seen or heard a word whatsoever about his whereabouts. And if his whereabouts are unknown to most, then Len’s are as well. That is until I turn to Axle. Now that he is working at Piston Motor Sports, I thought I would have a little insight, but I’ve yielded very little from him.

  All I have been informed about is Paige and Parker are both leaving, and he thought Len would be going with them, but she isn’t. When I asked why she wasn’t going to be on the road with them, all he told me was she said she had family stuff to deal with.

  Now my mind is reeling with what all that means. She hasn’t answered my calls or texts, so I’m left wondering.

  That’s why I’m twiddling my thumbs in my ever-present lap while I wait to meet with my boss. Mr. Landon called Michelle this morning while he was still in the air, asking for a meeting with me this afternoon after he was back in the office. He left it at that. I have no clue what this meeting is about. My next event isn’t for another three months, so I know that isn’t of any concern.