Taking Charge
Page 10
Lucy tried to look away but couldn’t. Memories of how she’d spent the nights last week would have been much more exciting if David had been there with her, watching her, taking the toy from her and bringing her to climax himself. Her body clenched, and she grew wet.
It didn’t matter that it was the middle of the day, that they were not alone, or that she’d just told herself she wouldn’t sleep with him. If he pulled her against him, claimed her mouth beneath his, she would have given herself over to him completely.
“Lucy?” David asked gently.
“Yes?”
“I want you. I don’t give a damn that everyone is watching us right now, but I do care what they think of you. Be ready by nine tomorrow morning. You’re getting on that plane even if I have to carry you onto it.”
Imagining that did nothing to calm the hot desire pulsing through Lucy. She told herself she should say no. If she couldn’t control herself now, in public, what would happen when they were finally alone? She licked her bottom lip. “You wouldn’t do that.”
“Then you don’t know me well enough yet.” He bent and kissed the spot just below her ear. His excitement pressed against her stomach, proof that their conversation was also turning him on. “I want you, Lucy, and I will have you. Maybe not today. Maybe not this weekend, but soon. We both know it’s inevitable.”
Lucy arched back from him, which only succeeded in pressing her more closely against his bulging cock. Her lack of ability to think when he was that close sent panic through her. “Let me go.”
“Say yes.”
“About the plane?”
“If that’s where you want to start.”
“Fine. Yes. Now let me go.”
David released her, and she bolted back into her house. Once inside, she leaned against the closed door and let out a long shaky breath.
So much for being able to keep things casual.
I’m going away with David.
Oh my God, I’m going away with David.
David rested an arm on the railing of the pen and stared at Lucy’s front door long after she’d disappeared through it. Of all the things he’d meant to say to her, announcing that he would soon fuck her wasn’t one of them. Something happened to his brain when he was around her.
He didn’t notice Lucas until the younger man was beside him. “It’s not hard to see why you decided to stay.”
David glared at Lucas. “Get back to work before I decide you are not, in fact, the best choice for this job.”
Lucas smiled. “You won’t fire me. You need someone to take over here while you pursue other interests.”
David grunted. He had no intention of letting Lucas go, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t tempted to slug him. “I do need you this weekend. I’m heading back to Fort Mavis. Can you handle everything while I’m gone?”
“Does the job come with a pretty girl I can moon over, too?”
David snarled, “Lucy’s coming with me.”
Lucas laughed and raised his hands in mock surrender. “I was only hoping there was more than one woman in town.”
David relaxed and was reminded of how he’d felt with Wyatt when he’d made a similar joke. Some things never became funny. “Just watch over the ranch and the horses.”
Lucas was quiet for a moment, then said, “I might not look like it, but I’ve had my share of girlfriends. If you need any advice, don’t be shy about asking.”
David’s temper rose again. “I am perfectly capable of working things out with Lucy on my own.”
Lucas raised his hands again, but this time his expression was serious. “I know, but you’ve been good to me, and I want to see you happy. Everyone wants it to work out this time.”
“Everyone needs to step back and mind their own fucking business.”
Undeterred, Lucas retorted, “We would, but no one wants you to—”
“Fuck it up again?” David snapped. He advanced on Lucas. “I did nothing wrong the first time, and she is coming around just fine. I don’t need or want anyone’s help with this. Why do all y’all find that difficult to understand?”
“Because no one wants to see the mopey, lovesick David again?” Lucas said, then ducked and retreated back into the round pen. “You didn’t have to deal with you.”
David swore and strode off. Lucas was wrong. He did have to deal with that side of himself. He’d lain awake night after night, asking himself why one woman could matter so much. He’d spent month after month doing whatever he could to convince himself she didn’t, only to find himself wanting her more instead of less as time went on.
If he had known when he first met Lucy that she was sadder and more desperate than she’d let on, he never would have returned to Fort Mavis. He would have stayed and made sure Ted York didn’t take advantage of her. He’d thought he had more time.
He’d been wrong.
His friends were well-meaning, but they didn’t see the difference between then and now. The first time, he’d played nice.
This time, he was playing for keeps.
Chapter Eight
That night, Lucy avoided her office and its contents. It would still be there on Monday when she returned. What she needed now was a dose of sanity, of calm. She tossed and turned until dawn and started the next day with a cold shower. She had no idea if it would be effective, but she was a wreck on the inside. With just enough makeup to conceal the circles beneath her eyes, she wavered back and forth while choosing outfits.
The practical choice was boots, jeans, and a blouse. She was going from one ranch to another. This wasn’t a date; it was a trip to see a good friend of hers. Although she didn’t know Mason well, she’d gotten to know his fiancée, Chelle, through Sarah. That couple lived a very different lifestyle than Lucy. They were often photographed at big events. They might want to go somewhere expensive. I should have asked. I need to call Sarah.
Thankfully, her friend picked up. “Lucy. Is everything okay? I’ve been calling you all week.”
In her underwear and bra, Lucy paced her bedroom. “I know. I’m sorry. I’ve been so busy with the new job. I saw your messages, and I meant to call, but time flew by and I didn’t.”
Sarah made a small sound, like she didn’t believe Lucy. When she spoke, she sounded hurt. “I’ve been dying to hear what it’s like to have David there, but I don’t want to bring up something you clearly don’t want to talk about.”
You just did. “Sarah, I didn’t call you because I didn’t know what to say.”
“Aha, I was right: not calling me was a decision. I thought we were getting close again, but sometimes I wonder. You didn’t tell me when your parents died. You didn’t turn to me for help when you needed it. Whenever something big happens in your life, you shut me out. How can we be friends if you won’t let me know you?”
Lucy sat on the edge of her bed, and her shoulders slumped. “Are you saying you don’t want me to come this weekend?”
Sarah made another sound of displeasure. “I’m saying I might slap you before I hug you. Or I might hug you, then slap you, then hug you. I’m not sure which. You have this idea in your head that people won’t love you if you’re not perfect. Have you looked at the rest of us? Whatever stupid thing you think you might be doing, chances are I’ve done just as bad. Talk to me, Lucy. Don’t shut me out.”
Lucy took a deep breath and a leap of faith. “If I tell you something, you can’t tell anyone. Not even your husband. Do you understand?”
“I tell Tony everything.”
“So that’s a no?”
“It’s a yes under duress. What is it? If you’re in trouble, I can’t promise I won’t enlist Tony’s help. We’re a team. But I won’t say a word to him unless I absolutely have to. How’s that?”
With a whoosh, everything Lucy had held in poured out. “David paid off my debt to Ted. I’m selling high-tech sex toys now to pay him back. I’m actually making money at it, but I can’t tell David. He is the nicest man I’ve ever met. I thought
Ted was nice, too, and I was wrong. Am I wrong about David?”
“No,” Sarah said slowly. “David’s a good guy.”
“Too good, right? Too good to want to be with someone who would sell sex toys.”
“Whoa, wait. First, I can’t believe you didn’t tell me that was what your new business was. I write romances. Why do you think that would shock me?”
“You haven’t seen some of these toys.”
“Exactly. Research. And, second, how do you know David wouldn’t be into them?”
Sarah’s really okay with it. Is it possible that I’m the only who is shocked by what I’m trying to sell? The only one who is embarrassed? No wonder I left Mavis. When I’m here, I feel like I have to be the daughter my parents thought I was. I have to find my way back to not seeing myself through their eyes.
“Is Tony into toys?”
“Not really, but he would be if I wore the right outfit and asked him to be. You have to give David a chance. He wouldn’t leave over something like that.”
And there it was, the reason Lucy was so afraid to move forward with David. “I don’t know if I could handle another person leaving me, Sarah.” Tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. “It’s why I have trouble leaning on people. If I don’t need you, I won’t be devastated if you leave, too.”
“Oh, Lucy. I’m not going anywhere.”
“I know. At least my head knows, but I never pictured myself alone like this. I had a family, and it was a good one. I thought it was, anyway. I loved Rhode Island. Life was fun, full, good. Then my dad died. I felt like I’d lost a quarter of my heart. Then I moved back here to help my mom, but what good did that do? And then Steven left. Every time something went wrong, I told myself to stay positive. All I had to do was be strong and keep going, but something happened inside me when Steven left, too. I can’t explain it. I want to hide from the world, but I feel so alone when I do. Horribly, utterly alone. I used to know what to do. Now, I don’t know who to trust, what to believe.”
“You. Are. Not. Alone. And David really cares about you. You have to know that.”
“I want to believe he does.”
“He stuck by Tony at his worst. If that didn’t run him off, nothing will.”
“I’m scared, Sarah. I don’t like feeling this way. I never used to be afraid of anything. How do I get back to being that person?”
Sarah was quiet for a bit. “I don’t think anyone ever gets ‘back’ after they’ve experienced loss. It’s terrifying when you realize how little of your life you’re in control of, that, at any moment, you could lose anyone or anything you love, and there is nothing you can do to stop it.”
“You think that way, too? You’re always so happy.”
Sarah sighed. “Of course I do, but I use that knowledge to make me stronger. What’s the alternative? Giving up? Wallowing in the past? I could have been that person, but I refused to be. When I accepted how temporary everything is, something beautiful happened. I started to see time as a gift. Every day I have with Tony is a day I am thankful for. I can’t think about what will happen if it ends. I can’t spend every day worrying that he might die or leave me for someone else. We want to have children. I won’t be able to enjoy them if I’m constantly afraid of losing them like I lost my little brother. I don’t want to live like that. Happiness is a decision to believe that we’re more than this—that despite what we know, being here is worth it. It’s a little like believing in Santa Claus. Once you know the truth, you never go back to waiting up to catch him come down the chimney, but you believe in the spirit of him, so the magic continues.”
She makes it sound so easy, just as she’s always made life look. But she’s experienced loss, too. She had issues with her family and survived them. All I have to do is believe? I wish I could snap my fingers and do that. “Should I tell David about my business?”
“Have you been on a date yet?”
“No.”
“Then I’d hold off on that. Let the man woo you a little before you bring out the dildos. Hey, that’s a great line. I may use that in a book.”
It was difficult to do anything but smile when talking to Sarah. “Thanks, Sarah. I can’t wait to see you.”
“Me too. Now, when are you coming?”
“Mason is flying us in this morning.”
“Is he? He is so cool.”
“What should I take to wear? Is any part of the weekend going to be formal?”
“I don’t think so. Pack a dress if you want, but you’re so tiny, you can fit into any of our clothes if you need something.”
A knock on the downstairs door made Lucy jump to her feet. “That must be David. I have to run.”
“Tell him I said hello.”
“I will.”
Lucy sprinted down the stairs and opened the door. This time she wasn’t afraid of the passion she saw blazing in David’s gaze as it raked over her. “Sorry, I was talking to Sarah about what I should wear.”
A slow, I-like-your-choice smile spread across his face. “And you decided to keep it simple?”
Lucy looked down and realized she was still only in her bra and panties. While turning three shades of pink, she turned and bolted up the stairs. “Oh my God, I’ll be right back.”
“No rush,” he called back with humor.
A few minutes later, dressed in jeans and a blouse, Lucy returned with a small piece of luggage. David grinned at her. She waved a finger in his direction. “We will pretend that never happened. I’m ready now.”
“I’m not,” he said, pulling her into his arms. He kissed her like a man who was returning home and couldn’t get enough of the woman he’d missed. She dropped her luggage at her feet, and her arms went up to circle his neck. His tongue plundered her mouth mercilessly, and she opened wider for the claiming. He pulled her against him, molded her to him, crushing her against his erection.
When he lifted his head and rested his chin on her forehead, his heart beat under her ear as wildly as hers. “You taste too damn good,” he growled.
You too. Lucy stood stiffly in his arms, wishing she could turn off her head and let herself simply enjoy him. I want to believe—in myself, in him, in happily ever afters. In a husky voice, she said, “We should go.”
David nuzzled her neck. “You’re right. Everyone is excited to see us. They’ve been calling all morning. That mattered to me—before you answered the door.”
Lucy pulled back from him. Even though she wanted to give in to how she was feeling, she thought about what Sarah had asked her earlier. They didn’t have a relationship. Not a normal one. He’d never asked her out on a date. She knew very little about him. All they had so far was an attraction neither one of them had proven successful at denying. “I need you to know that just because I said yes to the trip doesn’t mean that—that I am saying yes to anything else.”
He studied her face for a moment, then said quietly, “We can take this as slowly as you need to. Come on, we have a plane to catch.” He held out his hand to her.
Lucy put hers in his and felt a jolt of pleasure at how natural it felt. They walked together to David’s truck. Lucy watched his expression for a sign that he was displeased with her, but he was smiling. So many other men would have been frustrated with her. David was confident but patient. He wasn’t shy about what he wanted, but he cared about how she felt. Lucy had doubted men like him existed, but here he was. Not only was he good-looking, smart, and kind; he was also openly interested in her.
Good things can happen—if I believe they can.
Right?
It’s supposed to be that simple.
He caught her looking at him and paused before starting the ignition. “What is it?”
Focus on the positive—the part of the experience that feels like a gift. She didn’t have the words to articulate everything she was feeling, so she said, “You’re a pretty amazing man, David.”
He shot her a smile that set her heart beating double time again. “You
ain’t seen nothing yet, darlin’.”
As they drove to the airport, David kept the conversation light. They talked about Wyatt, his family, and how happy her manager looked now that he was working on her ranch again. They discussed the clear weather and how it was nice to be flying out on such a beautiful day. He could see Lucy relaxing the more they spoke.
Taking Lucy back to Fort Mavis would be good for her. She had a tendency to withdraw and hide. She did it with him, but also with her friends. She hadn’t left her house once in the past week. That wasn’t healthy. He knew all about hiding and how a person’s life could get smaller and smaller until it was suffocated. And, if I am being honest with myself, I’ve done my share of hiding. I keep adding layers of good deed on top of good deed, but does a lifetime of good wash away a person’s mistakes—even if those mistakes cost someone’s life? David pushed those thoughts back.
Lucy needed to get out of her house and away from that ranch. She needed to surround herself with people who cared about her. He’d known plenty of men who pulled their women away from the people they loved. Isolating women made them easier to manipulate. David had no respect for such men. No person or creature should ever stay somewhere because they were too broken to leave.
Lucy said she wanted to save her ranch, but David was no longer sure she should. She wasn’t happy there. Anyone could see that. If she had female friends there, he hadn’t heard about them, and they weren’t rushing forward to help her.
Away from that ranch, Lucy might flourish—find the easy smile Sarah said she used to have. David considered himself a good judge of people and horses. He looked for a spark in their eyes. If it was there, he knew there was more to them than whatever they were presenting. He’d rescued many haggard horses and sold them a year later in stunning condition.
Lucy was far from haggard, but when she thought no one was watching, her expression was one of a woman with the weight of the world on her shoulders. Like a mustang kept in a tiny corral for too long, she’s forgotten how to run free.
He smiled and wondered what Lucy would think of being compared to a horse. She might not take it as the compliment it was intended to be.