Angelina's Secret

by Diane Merill Wigginton

  Shadows playing across his face made him look ruthless and savage. I had to blink twice for I thought my eyes deceived me.

  Gently placing me on the bench he kneeled down. Retrieving the sheath from my pocket, he placed it on the end of the dagger and put it back into my pocket.

  “You can really never tell when these things will come in handy.” He patted the dagger that lay in my pocket against my leg. “Good thing you took your brother’s advice.”

  “How did you know I had it on me?” Astonishment showing on my face.

  “I felt it when we were dancing,” he answered offhandedly.

  “Is it often you hold a woman so closely while dancing that you know exactly what she carries in her dress pocket?” I asked slightly scandalized by his admission.

  “You can lose the disapproving tone, if you please. It isn’t often that I have the need to hold a woman so closely. They usually press in on me,” he added, feeling rather full of himself.

  “Hah . . . you have rather a high opinion of yourself.” I found his attitude grating on my nerves. Abruptly standing to leave, I took three steps before remembering my dress was undone

  “I heard no protests from you while we were dancing.”

  Whirling around, I fixed him with an angry scowl. “I couldn’t protest since your arm was cutting off my circulation, you pompous toad.” I turned around presenting my back to him and indicating my need by pointing to my dress where it gaped open. “Assistance, please.”

  “Toads don’t have thumbs.” Playing the fool, he held his hands up as if all his digits were stuck together.

  I turned on him with hands on my hips. “You have some nerve, Jude Deveraux, or would Judas be a more appropriate name for you?” I angrily said through clenched teeth so mad that I would swear steam escaped from my ears.

  “You have so many moods it is difficult to pick just which one is my favorite.” His arm snaked out ensnaring me tightly against his taut form. Tipping my head back with his free hand under my chin his kiss was tender and passionate at the same time. He tasted of red wine and sensuality and something so familiar. Then it hit me. Those gloriously full lips had kissed me before.

  Opening my eyes and pulling back as my hands furiously worked to untie his cravat and open his shirt. “Slow down, my pet, I enjoy enthusiasm but there are limits to even my self-control,” Jude said in his thick French accent which I discovered came out when he was amorous.

  Reaching my hands beneath the collar of his crisp white linen shirt, I worked one hand over his chest as my other hand sought out his left shoulder. Every scar just as I had remembered them, but the left shoulder would be the tell.

  “Ah hah! It was you all along, I knew it! And you tried to tell me I was mistaken.” I pushed hard against his chest to free myself from our entanglement.

  I paced back and forth in front of him, as I proceeded to berate his good name and parentage in the process. I turned to face him squarely now with hands on hips and eyes shooting daggers at him. “You lied to me. You tried to make me think that I had lost my mind because I said that the pirate captain and Jude Deveraux, the Duke of Bayonne, was one in the same. And yet here you are, and much to my surprise you are the very same! Care to explain yourself, Monsieur Deveraux?” My breathing labored heavily, so filled with anger I struggled to catch my breath.

  “Ma belle Ange, you truly are an angel,” Jude purred the words. “You now know my secret and the question that lies between us is what will you do with that knowledge?” He stood silently in front of me for a moment, then dropped to one knee. “My life is now in your hands, ma amour.”

  My anger suddenly dissipating like steam off a lake. The very thought of never being with him or touching him again weighed heavy on my heart. My breathing came in short bursts now for a different reason. “No! Don’t you start with your French and your sincere eyes. How could you?” A small scream mixed with a growl of frustration omitted from my throat as I clenched and unclenched my hands by my side, trying desperately to think.

  Walking over to him, I placed my hands on his face, tilting it up to mine. “I have not breathed deeply since the day you left me on the deck of that ship, and sailed away.” Tears springing to my eyes as one single tear escaped making a trail down my cheek. “I believed I would never see you again and my heart broke that day,” I confessed, while tears freely spilled from my eyes as I spoke what was truly in my heart. “Then like a dream you came strolling up one day, unconstrained, giving me a shock only to deny the truth. My imprisoned heart cannot take any more lies. I implore you take my heart or lock it away forever, never to be used again.”

  And with that, Jude wrapped one arm around my waist as he gently caressed my face. “You truly are a remarkable woman.” Our lips touched gently at first, as I reached up, releasing his hair from its tie and threading my fingers through it pulling him even closer still. My desire was igniting deep inside of me as a moan escaped from Jude’s throat.

  Lifting me in his arms, he began to look around as I rained kisses on his neck and face. I could tell we were moving but in what direction I did not care.

  Coming to a stop on the lake docks, he placed me down on the deck of the boat tied there. “Sit down before you tip the bloody thing over,” he ordered, and I obeyed.

  Throwing the rope into the boat, he climbed aboard and pushed off from the dock. We were now afloat on Buckingham House’s lake in one of the king’s specially designed boats.

  It conveniently came with pillows for comfort, a three-sided structure for added privacy and a blanket for warmth. What more could one ask for?

  Taking up an oar, he paddled the boat to the middle of the lake as I continued to cling to him. I tormented him with vexing kisses on his neck and face while I reached my hands under his shirt frantically revisiting every inch of him.

  “You little vixen!” his words coming out between clenched teeth.

  Giving up on the paddling for more rewarding endeavors, he shirked out of his coat and already unbuttoned waistcoat. Jude pulled my hands from their exploration of him, as I heard his sharp intake of breath. “Madam, if you don’t want me to completely shred your gown and reputation in one move, I suggest you wait one moment.”

  I began to feel suddenly self-conscious at his words, not sure if I was doing it wrong, so casting my eyes down slightly I began chewing the corner of my lip.

  Raking his hand through his hair he took several deep breaths to regain the control he was in danger of losing. An expression of frustration escaping his lips, Jude gently cupped my face with his hand as he pulled me closer. “My beautiful angel, you are like the devil himself come to tempt me into the grave. Look at me, please.” Cautiously, I looked into his eyes. “I could not go one more day without you. Ma Coeur, how do you say, my heart.” Removing his shirt, he reached behind me to unlace my gown. Slipping it over my head, he laid it gently on the other side of him. Next, he finished unlacing the ties of my corset and flung it into the lake before the words of protest could leave my lips.

  We knelt across from each other on the deck of the boat, moonlight bathing us both with soft glow. My heart beat faster as I anticipated what was to come next. I know I should have been scandalized by his actions, but I wasn’t.

  He caressed my hair and then my face as my blood began to boil. He pulled on the tie of my delicate slip, allowing firm breasts to strain against the material of their confines begging to be released.

  He kissed my swollen lips tenderly at first then greedily becoming more demanding. His hands searched my body leaving a scalding trail on my skin every place he touched. I shivered as my entire body tingled, demanding fulfillment.

  Pulling my lips from his to look into his storm-filled eyes, I saw the desire and lust he was keeping bridled. Touching his lips with my fingertips, I leaned down kissing his chest and nipples licking and sucking until they constricted into tight balls and his breathing came in harsh ragged pants. I felt him shiver as goose bumps formed on his skin. />
  Taking hold of my shoulders he pulled me up, ravaging my lips with his mouth as if he were a starving man given but a small morsel of food. He worked his way down my neck and finally to my breasts, fondling my taut flesh as a cry fell from my lips. My breathing matched his harsh, gasps for air, sensations so foreign I scarcely believed them to be real.

  “Tell me that you want me, Angelina.” The smoldering passion of his words sent delicious tingling sensations over my skin and to my core.

  “Yes, Jude, I desire you, I need you.” My words came out as a desperate cry, a longing for release but from what I could not fathom.

  His hand reached for the hem of my slip. The air was sucked from my lungs once again as he ran his hand along the inside of my thigh. My insides were aflame with quivering sensations that pooled near the lower portion of my belly, like liquid gold sitting over a flame.

  His sinfully sensuous lips were on mine as he pushed me back on the pillows. I arched my back and thrust my breasts toward him in hopes that he would never stop what he was doing. Ever!

  My entire body tingled as he raised the thin material higher and his hand continued to explore even deeper into my womanhood. Touching on one spot sent tiny explosions of pleasure to my brain so exquisite it hurt. Cries of ecstasy escaped my lips as he covered my mouth with his. Wave after wave swept through me. As I clung to him to keep from shattering into a million pieces’ tears rolled down my cheeks. Not tears of sorrow or pain, but tears of unbelievable rapture that I never knew existed.

  “Did I hurt you?” concern etching his voice, while he cradled me in his arms and brushed tears from my cheeks.

  “No!” Is all I could get out at first as I clung to him. My breathing still erratic, as emotion kept me from speaking. “Please, I beg you to do it again, even if my heart stops beating from the sheer pleasure of it. Don’t ever stop,” I begged.

  Squeezing me tightly to his chest, I could feel the pounding of his heart as he held me there secure and safe.

  “Aye, ma amour, I will never stop loving you.”

  9

  SUNDAY, MAY 1, 1763;

  MORE THAN JUST A BAD DREAM

  UDE HAD ARRANGED WITH HONORE to leave his carriage on the other side of the Buckingham property and to tell Jonathan that he would be taking me home after the party. This was the reason it had taken him so long to catch up to me when I had fled the dance floor.

  After our little tryst on the king’s boat Jude rowed us to the other side of the lake and docked the boat. I was thankful that I did not have to face the throngs of guests and his parents when leaving the party. With the state of my dress, not to mention my hair, I would have again been the talk of the season but for a very different reason.

  Sneaking in the servant’s entrance of the house carrying my shoes, I headed up the back staircase. Hearing the chimes on the clock announce three o’clock I said a little prayer that no one would be up and about to witness my unsightly circumstance.

  Slowly turning the knob on my door, I expected the room to be dark but instead it was bathed in light. Anna had waited up for me but fallen asleep on the chase. Attempting to sneak past her less she saw my condition, I turned and blew out one of the lanterns.

  I headed for the dressing room as I heard her voice behind me.

  “Did you have a fun evening, miss?”

  Turning around slowly I knew that I had been caught. I said with a sheepish smile pasted on my face, “Yes, thank you for inquiring. Why are you still up?”

  Anna lifted her eyebrows, giving me a curious look but not commenting on the state of my dress or hair. “Shall we get you out of that dress then?” Walking over to me, she waited for me to present my back to her.

  “I could have managed. You really didn’t need to wait up, Anna.”

  “Would you like me to brush out your hair tonight or would you prefer in a few hours when I get you up? Oh, and don’t forget I will need to start packing early if we are to leave for the country by noon,” Anna said, reminding me about the move. After Easter each year, Parliament took a five-week holiday and so did London socialites.

  “And what happened to the corset that you were wearing, Angelina? I also recall a wig being on your head when you left here yesterday,” she said with a hint of scolding added to her tone.

  “Now that is a bit of a story to tell, for sure, my wee lassie,” I said as I attempted to lighten the mood by giving her my best impersonation of a leprechaun.

  “To be sure and I’ll be hearing all about it in the morn. Of that you can be sure,” Anna teased as she mimicked an Irish brogue of her own.

  “Aye, to be sure.” Stepping out of my gown, I headed for the bed not wishing to explain anything more. “I think I will dispense with the nightgown tonight I just need some sleep, Anna. Good night,” I called out over my shoulder as I retreated under the covers pulling them over me as Anna blew out the lamps and went to bed herself.

  Tossing and turning all night, I relived over and over again the tantalizing memories from the boat as Jude invaded my dreams. His sapphire eyes penetrated every blood-boiling, toe-curling moment again and again.

  One moment I was blissfully happy, then a more sinister feeling of dread crept into the dream. Jude’s face was no longer his face but that of someone wearing a distorted mask. No longer experiencing pleasure, but instead, an overwhelming feeling of ominous foreboding reached into my imaginings grabbing me by the throat. I had the sensation of drowning over and over again. One moment I was being choked, then a knife was making small cuts to my neck and wrists. I couldn’t breathe as I felt the terrifying sensation of being held under the water. The liquid filled my lung, and I gasped, fighting for a lung full of precious air.

  I awakened suddenly, desperately gulping for air as Anna set the breakfast tray down loudly, dishes clanking together as she rushed to the bedside.

  “Angelina, it’s all right. You had a bad dream.” She grabbed hold of me and cradled me in her arms as I shook uncontrollably, sweat clinging to me along with my slip from the night before. “It’s all right. I’m here now, nothing can hurt you,” she shushed away the remnants of the nightmare, like a protective mother while speaking comforting words. But her protective nature did nothing to relieve the looming darkness that was inching its way into the marrow of my bones. A sinister black cloud was setting in like a dense London fog ever looming as it fills one’s lungs with its pungent thickness.

  Oh, dear sweet Anna, this omen could not be “shushed” away so easily. I thought to myself.

  An hour later, Anna ordered the tub to be brought up and filled with hot water, and William lit a fire to chase the chill from my room. These simple comforts did nothing to chase away the fears now living in the shadows of my nightmares. Nor did it stop the harbinger of doom that followed me throughout the day.

  I had settled on the black riding habit for traveling since it fit my mood. I would ride Dante out to our country estate instead of in the carriage for one main reason. Mother would want to talk nonstop about the king’s marvelous party the day before which would bring me back to the dream I had had that morning and that would never do. And for the second reason, I was restless and needed to stretch my legs and what better place than from atop one of the strongest beasts I knew, Dante.

  Despite Mother’s protests that it was too far to ride, in the end I got my way by sweet-talking Father.

  The carriages were finally loaded with luggage and people and began to pull out one by one. I tried to be patient and wait for Jonathan as I grew irritated with every passing minute. He was supposed to ride with me and keep me company at Mother’s insistence, but Jonathan was taking his sweet time and daylight was burning.

  Cantering alongside the carriages for the longest time my eagerness got the best of me. The moment we reached the main road, I gave Dante his head and let him run. The exhilarating feeling of freedom flying down the road, leaving behind the darkness of doom with the wind blowing in my face and hair was glorious.

&nb
sp; Dante and I had been galloping for some time when I rounded a corner of a narrow portion of road to discover a cart had turned over and the contents were spread across the road. Coming to a screeching halt as I nearly ran into the overturned cart and the person lying prone in front of it. Dante reared up nearly toppling me backward from my seat in his excitement.

  Leaping from the saddle I ran to the man and rolled him over to see if I could help. As I did so a large burley man ran out from the bushes and the one on the ground grabbed hold of my wrist.

  “Ha-ha, now lookie what we have us here. It’s a high born come to help the poor peasant out,” the first one said as he leered at me, grinning with his mouth full of blackened rotting teeth.

  “Now ain’t she a Good Samaritan? She is.” The tall skinny one said in a strong cockney tongue as he held tightly to my wrist.

  “Grab that horse before he takes off and someone discovers her missing before they are supposed to,” the fat one yelled to his partner.

  The skinny man jumped up, turning loose of my arm, then tried to grab Dante’s reins as I yelled loudly, startling Dante, causing him to rear up, sending the smaller man stumbling backward and tumbling to the ground.

  Dante pranced about a minute threatening to stomp on the fallen man until I shouted and smacked him on his rear flank, sending him running back in the direction from which we had come.

  “Now why did ya go and do that?” My tormenter slapped me across the face, stunning me momentarily.

  “He said she ain’t to be harmed, Roy,” the skinny man warned.

  “Shut your trap before I shuts it for you,” Roy threatened the thin man.

  Catching Roy by surprise, I stomped on his foot with my boot and clocked him in the face with my free elbow. Breaking free I ran from them, gathering produce from the fallen cart as I went, then launching the fruit and vegetables at them. I watched as they tried to dodge the flying rotten produce but were unsuccessful. Running out of ammunition, I pulled the dagger from my pocket ready to do them both harm if they touched me again.