by Lisa Campell
She looked at him, her hazel eyes glistened. He felt his chest tightening and he looked away. The ball was in a few days. Once the ball took place and she found a suitor, they would not spend so much time together anymore. The Duke and the Duchess were making grand preparations for the ball. At the reminder of his father and the Duchess, he thought back to the argument between them he had overheard. He could not get it off his mind. He could not stop wondering what it meant. And he wanted to share his thoughts with Lavinia, but he was skeptical about doing so. What if it could lead to something bigger, something dangerous? He didn't want her to be in danger. He decided to let it slip. Perhaps when he knew more, he would let her in.
Lavinia smiled, her clouded expression from nostalgia gone. "What color do you think would suit me for the ball?"
He chuckled. He rubbed his fingers against his chin and said, "Perhaps green."
She creased her brows. "Why?"
"It will bring out your eyes," he replied earnestly.
She blushed. He looked away. There was a strange feeling inside of him that grew each time he looked at her. He wanted it to go away, because he didn't want to jeopardize what they had. The friendship that they had built.
Clearing his throat, he said, "Also, when you walk into the ballroom, remember to smile like I taught you."
She looked up at him and nodded once. Her smile faded away. He realized what the ball meant for her. That she would have to become a lady of the ton, for the rest of her life. Her husband would expect it.
Over the next few days, they spent most of their time painting and simply talking, getting to know even more about each other. While Colin tried to perfect Lavinia's painting techniques, he came to realize that she had only suggested it because of him in the first place. She had simply wanted him to go back to doing what he loved. As the debut ball drew near, he realized he was dreading it.
When the day of the ball finally arrived, Colin was gloomy. He did not see Lavinia throughout the day and he missed her. Two days before the ball, the Duchess had called in Madame Renoir, a French seamstress who worked out of Old Street. The Duchess had asked Madame Renoir to make a gown weeks ago, despite Lavinia's protest. Colin hadn’t been allowed in to see.
The servants were running around, placing final touches to the preparations, putting everything in order. The Duchess tested the meals prepared, and as for the wine, Colin had been called to aid in choosing what was best to be served.
Colin was in the garden, painting, when Spratt had approached him to inform him that the Duke and Duchess were in the cellar and wished to see him. He left immediately to answer to them.
When he walked into the cellar, he saw the bottles of wine placed on the table before them. The Duke was sipping a glass, and the Duchess stood opposite him. "Would that do?" she wondered.
Upon seeing him, they both smiled. "Colin," the Duke said. "Welcome. The Duchess thought it a good idea if you tasted the wine. Seeing as you must have a sophisticated palate from your travels, tell us which is best to be served at a grand event such as this one. Come."
He made his way over to the table and helped in testing the wine. He made the choices he thought were best.
"Thank you, dear. We will go with this," the Duchess said, raising the wine they had had chosen. “We should have enough bottles of it to go around.” She handed it to Spratt and together they headed out. He was left alone with the Duke. He inclined his head.
"The ball will indeed be grand," said Colin.
"Oh, yes." The Duke nodded. "Indeed." He said stiffly, they were awkward with each other again, now they were alone.
"Perhaps I should go prepare now. Excuse me." Colin bowed and turned to head out.
"Colin," his father called. He stopped and turned towards him.
He was surprised to see that his father had a solemn expression. He tilted his head to the side and asked, "Is everything alright, Father?"
Colin was quite confused. He had never seen his father this way before. He had never seen him looking defeated.
"I just want you to know that I am grateful that you are my son," his father said. He smiled but it did not quite reach his eyes. "I am well aware that I have not quite been the best father, but I care for you. And I am proud of you."
He gestured around. "If anything were to happen to me, you are the next Duke of Somerset and I want you to ready yourself for that. "
Colin was at loss for words. Why was his father talking in such a way? Why was he being so sentimental?
"Is everything fine, Father?"
"Yes." The Duke had a faraway look in his eyes. "I only realized that I had never said those words to you, even as a lad."
The conversation he had heard between his father and the Duchess rushed back into his mind. Something was certainly going on. As he watched his father get lost in his own thoughts, eyes focused on the mahogany table, Colin could not help but wonder what had made his father like this. Never in his entire life had he seen his father in this way.
He concluded that he did need to let someone in on everything that was going on. He had thought he would keep Lavinia in the dark about it all, until he was certain that it was not something dangerous. However, Colin was now at crossroads and he was perplexed. Lavinia had lived at the manor for the last five years since he was away. Perhaps she would know something. And she was the only one that he could trust.
Chapter Nine
Out of all the gowns the seamstress had brought, Lavinia chose the green one. The pink muslin made her look pale, and the red velvet had a gold lace, which she did not like. The green silk caught Lavinia's eyes. She loved it. It had a lush silk skirt, and an empire waist. Along the low neck, there was an even darker green lace. Colin had said that the color green would suit her. He had said that it would bring out her eyes. He had been right. It was wonderful.
The dress highlighted her skin tone and her hazel eyes. Her blonde hair was pulled up into a chignon, fastened with glistening silver pins, which matched the silver earrings and diamond necklace she wore. Golden ringlets framed her cheeks. She had to admit that even as she stared in the mirror, she looked magnificent. But the only person she cared to see her, was Colin.
"Lavinia, darling!" She heard her mother call from behind her. She blinked. She turned to see that her mother, Rebecca, Madame Renoir and her assistants were all standing there, smiling at her.
"You look beautiful, darling," her mother said.
Lavinia smiled at her mother. The Duchess was dressed for the ball as well, in a blue empire-waisted silk gown. "Has the ball begun?"
The Duchess nodded.
"And Colin?"
"Ah. Yes. Last I saw him, was in the wine cellar. He helped pick the best wine to be served. Now come on," the Duchess beckoned to her. "Everyone is waiting for you."
Lavinia nodded. She inhaled, letting it out. She was so nervous. All eyes would be on her this evening. "I am ready."
She walked out of her bed chamber and made her way down the staircase, nervous at each step she took. Her mother kept on grinning. She was apparently thrilled. Lavinia was simply terrified. She wished to talk to Colin. He always knew the right words to say. He might be able to calm her nerves.
"Steady, darling. We are almost there," her mother said. This was the most affection Lavinia had gotten from her mother in the past five years. This was the only time her mother acted like she cared deeply. Lavinia felt hurt and happy at the same time. She had always wanted her mother's attention and support in her life. It hurt her, because the only time she was getting it was when she did not really want it. She did not want the debut after all. All of this was for her mother and the Duke.
Just before they walked into the ballroom, the Duchess kissed her cheeks. "I am so proud of you."
Lavinia searched her eyes. Behind her, she saw the Duke approaching with a weary smile. "The guests are waiting."
Lavinia could not help but be reminded about what she had learnt earlier. The Duke had loaned her fathe
r money. Her mind raced, and she could not help but wonder what was going on. She felt the urge to ask, but she refrained from it. This was not the time.
"Alright. Go on." The Duke nodded.
Lavinia looked away from them and headed into the ballroom, not looking back once. As she walked in, the chandelier situated above reflected on her, making her jewelry glitter. At the same time, Spratt the butler announced her presence.
"Lady Lavinia Crawford!"
The entire crowd turned to look at her as she descended the staircase. Her heart pounded. She began to hear murmurings and soon, applause. Just as Colin had told her to, she smiled demurely. She tried not to hold eye contact for too long. She looked everywhere and anywhere.
Once she was finally down the steps, the center of the crowd parted and she was still the center of their attention. Of course, it was her debut. She was supposed to begin the quadrille with a partner. She had hoped Colin would take the first dance but she could not see him. She stood there, and waited to be asked by someone, anyone she knew. Her eyes wandered, she was looking for Colin.
Beside her, someone cleared his throat. Her attention was averted. Just as she looked to see who it was, she saw a couple of gentlemen, who had been making their way towards her, retreat. Her view was blocked by the gentleman beside her. He stood before her and bowed, while his right hand was stretched out.
It was one of their neighbors, the Earl of Kent. He bowed to her.
"My Lady, may I have this dance?" He looked up at her. His green eyes glimmered as he stared at her expectantly. His blonde hair was swept back, and under the light, it was bright and shiny.
Lavinia did not feel like dancing. Not with him. But when she looked around the room, and saw the smiling faces, as well as that of her mother, she knew that she had to. Forcing a smile, she placed her hands in his and curtsied. "Thank you, My Lord. I would be happy to."
He led her to the center of the room and they began to dance while everyone watched.
"How do you feel about this evening?" he asked.
"Splendid, thank you."
More couples joined the waltz. Lavinia danced with two other gentlemen who also seemed interested in her, but by the end of the dance, she was back in the arms of Lord Kent. They stood opposite each other. He bowed and she curtsied. The crowd applauded.
Lavinia stared around, still seeking Colin. Her eyes brightened when she caught sight of him. He smiled at her. He was dressed in a black coat that had gold embroidery. His dark hair was parted at the side, making him look formal. It made her blush. He was quite far from where she was. She wanted to make her way over to him but was stopped as her path was blocked.
"Looking for someone?" Lord Kent asked.
Startled, Lavinia looked at him. He was grinning. "I see the way your eyes wander, My Lady."
He took her hand in his. She didn't like that he held her like that, so she slipped her hand out of his. He chuckled.
Lavinia faced him squarely. "I am not looking for anyone."
Now, she was standing amongst the crowd, talking to Lord Kent. It seemed that other gentlemen did not approach her because of him. She saw them all looking away awkwardly. She sighed.
Lavinia felt trapped with Lord Kent. Perhaps he wanted to make his intentions known, which made her more uncomfortable. As she remembered Colin telling her, she made sure not to maintain eye contact with him.
"You are a terrific dancer, My Lady," Lord Kent said.
"Thank you, My Lord."
He winked. "What other talents do you have, My Lady?"
She shook her head. "Not many, My Lord, though, I like to learn new things."
She thought of Colin then, and the paintings. Her heartbeat sped up.
Spratt was walking by, a tray in hand, and a wine glass. Relief flooded through her as he drew near.
She took the wine from the tray as he made to walk by her. Spratt stopped walking and smiled. “Drink slowly, My Lady.” She took a few sips, then set it on the tray. He half-bowed and then walked away.
Lord Kent smirked. "You seem like you need fresh air. Perhaps a walk in the garden would be good for you?"
Lavinia's eyes widened. How dare he? She couldn’t imagine the scandal. Standing there, with many people who seemed to be watching her every move made her uncomfortable. She wanted to be out of there as soon as she could.
"Excuse me, My Lord.”
She could not help but wonder about Colin. She wished they had shared a dance, or even spoken tonight. But he had been far away and although he had smiled at her, he had not approached as she wished. He could have approached her at least. Was he avoiding her?
Lavinia did not care about what people thought. All she needed was to be alone. She left her own ball, heading for the garden.
Right before she slipped out of the ballroom, she looked back, hoping to see Colin, but she saw no sign of him.
Chapter Ten
Colin stood in the shadows, at the far end of the hall, where the light was dim, so he could not be seen. The ballroom was beautiful, flowers adorned each end, and the lighting was amazing. The ballroom was simply magnificent, except he did not really want to be here. He wanted to be there for Lavinia, but not to watch her be with another gentleman. His eyes stayed at the entrance door the entire time he stood in the room. He anticipated her arrival. He wanted to look at her and smile at her. He also wanted her to do the same to him. He wanted to be the only one who saw her as she descended the staircase. He wanted to be her first dance. He wanted so many things. So many things that eventually, when he thought twice about it, made him afraid. It was inappropriate.
"Lady Lavinia Crawford," Spratt announced, his voice resonating through the ballroom. Everyone looked up to see her. Lavinia. She was dressed in a beautiful green dress, and her hair was pulled back, adorned by silver pins that glittered under the light.
The green dress, he noted, brought out her eyes, so that the hazel was more defined. His lips parted. She looked magnificent. He stood amongst the crowd watching her. Her eyes moved about, darting from one end to another. Was she looking for him?
He swallowed hard. He wanted to make his way over to the bottom of the stairs, so she could place her hand in his and he could be her first dance. He looked over at the Duke and the Duchess and saw how happy they were, but also, how perturbed the Duke seemed. He kept on looking over his shoulder and forcing a smile.
Colin's focus shifted. What was wrong with his father? He looked up at Lavinia who was descending the stairs. He wondered when he would be able to talk to her about this. He needed to get to the bottom of the matter.
His breath hitched when the crowd applauded. He averted his gaze to see that Lavinia was now in that arms of Lord Kent. He could not see properly, and he did not care to see him properly. A tightening in his chest made him look away. He wondered then what he was even doing at the ball. He should have stayed in his bed chamber. Perhaps he needed to leave. He would talk to Lavinia after. He moved into the crowd, in order to get to the end where the door was situated. He walked by swiftly, bowing to noblemen he recognized as he did, and smiling at ladies who wanted his attention.
He was almost near the door, when his eyes met with hers. Her eyes widened. His did too. He did not realize that merely making eye contact with her would make him so happy. She was about to move, when her path was blocked. His smile faded instantly. He sighed. This was a reminder that he did not need to be here tonight. He proceeded to make his way to the door but froze when his eyes caught sight of who had blocked her path.
Colin stopped walking, and his lips parted. He would recognize such a mischievous smile anywhere.
"Lord Kent." He shook his head. Were there no other gentlemen who could have approached her? It had to be that rogue. Colin remembered him from his earlier years. Lord Kent had been known to be a libertine, who cared not about who he hurt or whose reputation he ruined, so long as he had his way.
Colin sighed. The Duchess had been right. Perhaps if Lavinia h
ad gone to social events more often, she would have been aware of the dangers of gentlemen like this one, but for now, she must be oblivious to his true intentions. Colin moved, made his way through the crowd, hoping to get to them soon enough. However, the color drained from his face when he saw her making her way out of the hall, with Lord Kent, following behind her, but certainly making his way out as well. If he did not act fast, a scandal would ensue tonight.
"Lord Grandview?" a Lady said, blocking his path.
He creased his brows as he took a good look at the Lady. Lady Isabel Baldwin. It felt as though air had been knocked out of him. His past came rushing back. He recalled Lady Isabel. He had attended her debut five years ago and picked up an interest in her. She had in him also, but he had not been willing to settle down. He had wanted to leave by then. He had not officially began courting her, but they both knew what they had felt at the time. He had sent a secret letter to her, expressing his deepest apologies and how he wished to travel the world. She had never replied, and he had waited.
