I glanced at the young girl. We should get her home soon. “That I should have talked to him about the prenup.”
His gaze narrowed. “Why? Frank is a corporate shark.”
I shrugged and quickly said, “He works for my sister’s husband, so it’s like family, I guess. I was surprised about the allowance.”
“I promised six figures.” He mumbled and his father came closer. “Didn’t you read the papers?”
I motioned for us all to head back and he nodded, but he said, “No. I… didn’t read or ask for details. My own fault.”
Hudson took Chelsea away from her friends and the limo arrived. The sky decided to crackle like it would rain soon, so it was a good time to get out.
Nothing would be sadder for Chelsea than rain pellets hitting the newly buried coffins.
We walked to join Hudson and Chelsea when Carter asked me, “Did you want more?”
My shoulders tightened, and I shook my head. “No… you misunderstood.” The dark clouds overhead meant we only had a moment, so I said, “Chelsea, are you wanting to head back?”
The tears in her eyes glistened. I handed her a tissue and we headed to the limo with the men.
Chelsea sniffled but said, “It’s still strange that I’ll never see them again.”
I let her get in the car first. “When I lost my parents, I didn’t know what to do. I’m here for you whenever you want to talk.”
She squeezed my hand. “I wish I’d known you before now.”
For the ride home, no one said anything, but I saw Chelsea and Hudson holding hands.
In medical books, I’d read it was usually easier to accept people who didn’t want to fill in for a missing role and Hudson was more a grandfather she’d always known.
As we drove back onto the ranch and stepped out of the car, the dry, warm air washed into my lungs.
Carter opened the door. “Ridley, we should talk.”
I waited until Chelsea and Hudson were far enough away then glanced out the window to the tall grass.
In Pittsburgh, my view was the street or the houses behind me. In his ranch, he had clear fields without anyone else in sight. I heard his footsteps and turned around.
I crossed my arms under my chest. “We’re getting married because we want to help Chelsea, right? My questions about the contract today triggered you.”
He swallowed and took a step back. “Right and my lawyers want us to rewrite the custody arrangement so we can start on proper adoption proceedings soon and settle everything.”
Marriage meant we both had a say. I shrugged. “Have them talk to Frank. He knows more details on what I signed than I do.”
“Of course. The lawyers can talk.” I met his brown-eyed gaze and wished there was more he had to say. But he just stared at me, without another word.
Minutes ticked past and the silence was palatable.
My phone rang and it broke the moment. I glanced at my screen and then stepped away from him. “My sister Indigo is calling and it’s probably a conference call with the others. Can I have a few minutes alone to tell them what we’re doing here?”
He massaged the back of his head. “Of course. See you for lunch and to discuss the wedding ceremony. Pop and Chelsea want to be there.”
I held the phone in the air. “Sounds perfect. Be back soon.”
I walked down the hall to my room, so I’d have some privacy. As I locked the door, I breathed. I’d never expected a happily-ever-after in my life. I’d never get a second offer with half of what he'd offered me here.
I ought to be grateful. At least here, no one saw my tears that I had no right to shed. I should be happy as this was everything I'd ever wanted, but water streamed out of my eyes like I was fooling myself.
Chapter 11
Carter
After Ridley went to her room, my heart plummeted.
All my life, I'd avoided women who only spoke about money. I grew up with my mother, which was enough for a lifetime. In the end, I’d broken up with Dora because she’d always mentioned how much money she didn’t have like that was an obsession, being poor.
Yet, at the funeral, I was pricked. One was Ridley discussing money as she hit on an old wound, but I hadn’t expected that she hadn’t read the prenup. She had every right to question, but my stomach tightened. Discussion of money prickled my skin like money was the only reason to care about me. I knew that was a stupid thought and it wasn’t what happened.
And the bigger issue was that Bernie was dead. I swallowed and the silence in the air didn’t ease me.
I probably shouldn’t want to hold Ridley's hand in mine as I was too needy and wanting a fantasy that wasn’t real. I wanted her to care about me, which she didn’t.
We weren’t meant to be.
I looked out the window and hoped to go to Henry and help with his training, but not in my suit. Plus, someone might need me here.
Adrenaline still pumped in my body from unsaid words, but I headed to my office to get some work done, but the doorbell rang.
I returned to the door and opened it. Sally stood there, but her gaze was the same. Every time I looked at her, I remembered carrying Aaron’s body off the battlefield and then days later stepping off the plane to deliver his body in a casket. His widow nodded at me and I went to sit at my desk.
“Sally, I didn’t expect to see you right after the funeral.”
“I didn’t expect to be here, so we’re even.” She let herself in and glanced around as she asked, “Where’s Ridley?”
I pointed to the back of the house and wondered if they had some sort of plans now, but said, “She’s talking to someone. How can I help?”
She put her hands in the pockets of her black pants. “Today’s ceremony was like when I buried Aaron.” She dabbed her eyes to erase her tears. “Bernie never joined the service like you and Aaron, but we’re a small town and it’s like losing another part of my heart. We were all friends and Chloe was so good with my boys.”
Unlike the three of them, I’d not gone to the local public school, but when I’d been home from boarding school, I’d often hung out with Bernie and met Aaron through him, long ago.
I lowered my head and my throat was parched when I said, “Yeah. Bernie talked up the service more than anyone else. He was the Navy SEALs PR campaign back when we were kids.”
She let out a small laugh. “Guess his heart condition didn’t matter in the end.”
The Navy hadn’t waived Bernie’s heart issue, and ultimately, what killed him had been a car crash.
My body was tense, but I said, “No.” I asked as calmly as I could despite my arteries pumping blood through my body faster than usual, “Are you holding up okay?”
“Yes.” She made no move to leave and instead said, “I wanted to come by and see if you, or Ridley, or Chelsea need anything. I want us all to stay friends and you two seem in love, which is refreshing to see in you.”
This wasn’t why we were getting married. Last night had been mind-blowing, but I was the last guy to deserve happiness. Dora’s death and Sally’s husband’s were reasons why, but I asked, “You are?”
She whispered, “Yeah. You didn’t kill Aaron.”
Therapists had told me the same. They’d also said Dora made her own choice that night, but I was alive and the rest of my team was dead. This was my burden and I shook my head. “Don’t.”
She had tears in her eyes too. “You don’t have to feel guilty for living. He loved you like a brother and he’d want you to live your life.”
I was the only one in the spot with enough cover that day. When I closed my eyes, I still heard the gunshots and saw the pools of blood at my feet.
I’d not wish this on anyone but asked, “Yeah?”
Sally hugged me. “At the funeral today, it was clear Ridley steered your family and sweet Chelsea through some hard moments. You’re lucky you found a strong woman. I was worried you’d settle on some vain and vapid woman I’d never want to be around.”
“And I didn’t say anything about your mom.” Sally asked, “Is everything okay?”
“No. I wasn’t looking for a replacement.” I walked Sally to the door. “Look, thanks for coming over.”
She patted my cheeks. “No worries. Please tell Ridley to call me, okay. She strikes me as nice and I hope we can be friends.”
“I will,” I said and waited until she left.
As I closed the door, I was alone again.
I massaged the back of my hair. There was no way Ridley deserved the blood on my hands. If she didn’t care about me, then maybe we’d work as a partnership that had clear terms and actions. While she hadn’t said she cared, she had an open heart.
I’d taken advantage of her goodness and forgot myself with her for a while. I had no right to seek refuge again.
I went toward my office to do work, and forget about our upcoming nuptials and my past.
My father was sitting in my seat and stood. “Son, there you are.”
I waited for him to take the guest's chair.
Once we were settled, I asked, “What’s going on, Pop?”
He put his hands on the desk like we were negotiating something. “Something seemed off between you and Ridley today. You’re getting married soon, and I… wanted to say you should do what makes you happy.”
Was this an intervention? My skin buzzed. “I’m fine. We’re good. Look, I’m not like you.”
Pop sat back in his chair. “When I married your mother, I was young and wanted to have the prettiest woman around. I realized early on we had problems, but I stayed because I wanted to be in your life.”
Now that was honest. I stared at his brown eyes. Vanity was the one trait I couldn’t stand. “I… Pop, Ridley and I didn’t keep in touch for ten years. I shouldn’t have lied to you.“
“Yes and maybe that explains the tension of today.” Pop said and then tapped the sides of his seat like he’d made a point, “Unlike us, she has some common sense. We might need a little of that around here, but only if you’re happy.”
That wasn’t my life. I wasn’t getting the happily-ever-after. “Tomorrow, we’re going to get married at the courthouse. I told her you wanted to be there.”
He nodded at me. “I’ll call our personal shopper and tailors to get us whatever colors you and your bride choose for the day.”
“We don’t have a color. We never really talked about it. Does she even have a white dress?”
I’d had her things delivered last night and tucked into her room. But I lifted my shoulders. “I don’t know…”
Pop texted on his phone. “I’ll get five options sent over. She had pops of green in her two outfits she’d brought here. As it’s just family, I’ll tell our shopper to keep it simple.”
Our mother had set up the family with access to every store and stylist within a hundred miles, even still.
A chill ran through me as I said, “We are planning a bigger wedding later.”
“Good.” He snapped his finger. “Now, that makes me happy.”
My eyebrow raised. “Glad I’ve finally done something to earn that one.”
He stood and then pointed me toward the door. “Look, go and find your bride. You both seemed tense today. Chelsea and I are going to watch a movie. Maybe we can catch you for dinner.”
I tugged my ear and walked him out. “I told Ridley to join us all for lunch.”
He fixed my tie like I was about to go to some high school dance, but he said, “Distract your bride. I know you know how to do that. Keep her happy and then life here will be more pleasant. And we can meet for dinner.”
I leaned against the office door and asked, “That’s your advice? Keep her happy?”
He strode out. “Well, if you can keep her away from my health chart, I’ll be happier.”
I tapped on the edge of the frame and shook my head. “No, but nice try.”
Pop winked at me, “Your mom liked me to give her some extra treat when I upset her, like jewels.”
What attracted me to Ridley was how she didn’t put her looks first. I said, “Ridley’s not-"
“Then you’ll have to find your own way to apologize for being a jerk.” Pop interrupted and headed off.
I spoke to his back. “I wasn’t.”
He glanced over his shoulder. “It’s usually easier to live with a woman if you’re willing to apologize. My own father had told me that, but I never listened. You probably should as you have a good one.”
The gnawing in my gut saying that I'd hurt her today was there. And I needed to apologize.
I called out before he disappeared. “Talk to you later, Pop.”
I closed my office and headed to her room. Inside I heard the murmur of her voice and my heart lightened. Falling for Ridley was dangerous. People died near me when I upset them, and Ridley was already worming her way into my heart.
I knocked and waited for her to let me in. I didn’t have flowers or any gift. I needed to get a grip and stay focused on our reality.
And hopefully, we figured out how to make everything work.
Chapter 12
Ridley
Nicole saw everything in life that ever happened to her as the next step to something even better. She blogged and lived a life where she made herself the constant example. Clean living, happiness, and positive self-talk were all her cures.
And she'd just earned her ten millionth follower. Companies fought for her influence, which basically meant my little sister and I had nothing in common except for being family.
I told her how I was marrying Carter, and for a few moments, she didn’t respond, but then she asked, “Are you sure you want to do this?”
Fireworks exploded in my gut that I knew were just my nerves. I put my head in my palm and wished I could say I was a joyful bride, but I said, “Chelsea thrives here.”
Nicole made a hmm sound and then said, “But you need to honor yourself and what makes you happy.”
Happiness was like an elixir of life that drove Nicole to do yoga, eat organic, and share everything she ever did with the world.
I pressed my lips together and finally chose my words, “I don’t know what I want that will make me happy.”
“Do you love Carter?”
Maybe I always had. He was perfect and no one else measured up to the man I'd danced with years ago. He’d been the star of my dreams for years, but that was beside the point. We’d not agreed on feelings. I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter, does it? It’s what’s best for Chelsea.”
“You’re being stubborn. Your feelings matter.”
No, they didn’t.
My feelings weren’t important at all and I sat and was completely still when I said, “I’ll never have another chance if I don’t take this one.”
“What does that mean?”
A knock rattled my door and my heart jumped. “I have to go, but wish me luck.”
I opened the door, still holding my phone, and Nicole said, “Is it Carter?"
It was.
I curled my lips and hoped it looked like a smile or a good imitation of one. He pointed to come inside and I nodded.
To my sister, I said, "Yes.”
“Put him on.”
Nicole was a force of nature. I didn’t have her strength. I lowered my hand. “I… my sister, Nicole, wants to talk to you.”
He took the phone from me. “Hi, Nicole. Nice to hear your voice.”
Nicole wasted no time and asked, “Are you marrying my sister because you’re in love, or are you just using her?”
Damn. I grabbed for my phone, but he avoided my attempt and told my sister, “Your sister is the best woman I've ever met. I don’t deserve her love.”
Nicole made a "hmmph" sound which made my entire body freeze.
She said, “None of us do.”
At least she wasn’t disloyal. I took my phone back. “We have to go.”
“Bye,” I said and hung up, turning my phone off. We didn’t need another sibling or cousin calling. This was my life to lead and no other opinions were welcome. I hugged my waist. “Sorry, my sister is a big believer in positive talk and creating her own future. She runs a blog.”
He sat on the edge of the bed. “Sounds like a nice gig.”
Why was he here? I… wasn’t sure but decided not to ask. So I sat beside him and folded my hands together, “She means well.” I turned my knees toward him. “What’s going on?”
Goosebumps grew all over me as he said, “My dad wasn’t sure if you had a dress for tomorrow, so he ordered you one.”
Huh? I’d had a magical dress and heels in my size this morning. I raised my eyebrow and asked, “Did Hudson get this dress?”
Carter’s nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t think about clothes.”
My shoulders dropped. “I thought it was you, the staff, or magic. I’ll thank him at lunch.”
He patted my knee. “I came to talk.”
The tension in my neck was back. I rubbed it. “Sure.” But then I looked at my feet. “This feels serious.”
He massaged my back until I glanced up at him and then he said, “I came to make peace. Sorry about earlier.”
Apologizing to me? My eyes widened as I asked, “Why?”
He held his head down and his cheeks almost seemed red. “When you mentioned money, my mother’s memory came to life.”
“I understand.” I hugged him. Today was emotional. We were both friends with Chelsea’s parents.
I tapped my hands together. “Look, I didn’t even read the numbers until Frank mentioned it today.”
His eyebrow quirked up. “I immediately assumed when you mentioned numbers that you wanted more and I didn’t process that you hadn’t even read it.”
“It is probably hard to believe.” My skin jolted and I pivoted away as I fixed my hair. The last thing I could admit was that I was falling for him. “I did, but I somehow missed that part, or I guess I turned a blind eye.”
Wicked Cowboy (Steel Series Book 4) Page 8
