by B C Morgan
“Why would you pity me? I don’t get it.”
“Because you’ve been claimed, as though you’re some kind of prize to be taken. It doesn’t seem right to me,” yes I know the world isn’t black and white but I can’t help the way I view the whole fucking, messed up system.
“Ahh, but you see he asked if he could claim me,” my mouth drops open at her words and she smiles softly before moving closer to me. Talking quietly, trying to limit the chance of being overheard. “Bradley and I knew each other when we were younger, until the Harkwrights fired my father and we were forced to leave this damn town,” she exhales hard and I don’t miss the slight tremble that is over taking her hands, until she tucks them under her thighs. “He died a few months ago and my mom has been struggling, barely making ends meet so I signed up for this place. Despite what they did to my family, they could be the ones to save what’s left of us. I never forgot about Bradley and he must have felt the same because he sought me out the moment we got here. He went crazy anytime any of the other guys tried to get near me and I didn’t want their attention. I only wanted his.”
“So why the claiming?”
“Because the other guys were getting more eager in their advances, I think it’s more about breaking me than an attraction. They destroyed my father, why not carry on the legacy? Besides, I really like Bradley and we’re going to take this time to get to know each other again, he’s keeping me safe and he hasn’t looked at another girl in here. Don’t pity me, be happy that I’m one of the few people safe from the darkness that walks these halls,” her ominous words make me feel as though I have cement in my stomach as she pulls away, and I guess the conversation is over.
“Thirty-Four, the doctor will see you now,” a nurse says and I climb to my feet, as I ignore the stares and follow the nurse to the office. Only, I don’t quite make it that far.
My eyes lock on Aeron as he leans against a desk in one of the treatment rooms with a nurse dropping to her knees. A smirk graces his lips and bile rises up in my throat and I don’t think as I flip him off and march into the room I was set for. His laugh chases after me but I know he isn’t following it. Why would he when he’s about to get swallowed whole by a nurse in uniform? Un-fucking-believable.
I push the door harder than intended and I jump back as it slams against the wall and my eyes fall on a shocked - and rather confused looking - Cole. Just my luck he would be my doctor today, although really, didn’t I already know this was going to happen?
“Please come in, close the door behind you,” he says, being very professional, almost as though he can’t hear my pulse thumping in my ears.
I do as I’m told and take the seat that he waves his hand at, I swallow hard even though he isn’t looking at me now. Instead he’s looking up at the ceiling and pacing the ground. Yet each time he moves, it seems to bring him closer to me. Why isn’t he sitting down and telling me why I’ve been summoned today?
“I-is e-e-everything okay?”
His eyes meet mine and a strangled laugh escapes him before he drags his hand over his face and deliberately comes closer this time until he’s standing in front of my legs and looking down at me.
“I once said to you that age is just a number and I wasn’t lying Luna, so I need you to believe me when I say this next part,” he pauses and I nod my head at him, unsure if I can really promise such a thing. I don’t even know what he’s going to say.
“Damn it Luna, I want you,” eyebrows meet hairline, your new best friend. On another note, I can’t think of a damn thing to say in response. “Not just because you are beautiful and I hate to admit how goddamn sexy you look in these clothes. No, I want you because I know how much you hate wearing them, how you prefer to go unnoticed and hide how amazing you really are. That all you want from life is to be able to cook the food you want and share it with the world, and that you want your family to be happy and cared for. You don’t want to be rich, you just want to live a good and happy life. No matter what it will cost you to get it, that’s why I want you.”
He’s breathing hard, as though he’s just run a marathon and I’m matching him breath for breath. I’ve fantasized about this moment so many times since I met him and now that it’s happening, I don’t know what to do. There isn’t anything I can do, I’m here and I can’t have him. That realization makes my breathing steady out as ice fills my veins and my heart beats slower.
His hands come down on my arm rests and I fold mine over my stomach, hugging myself as I drop my chin to my chest.
“Look at me Luna, please,” I can hear the desperation bleeding through his voice as I do as he asks, and his mouth is on mine before I can react.
His arms stay on the rests as mine thread through his hair, my legs parting as he steps between them. He drops to his knees, our lips not breaking once as one of his hands brushes across my hip before sliding up until it’s tangled in my hair and all I can do is lose myself in him. Knowing how right this feels, proves how wrong it truly is, but I’m not strong enough to pull away. My breath becomes his and vice versa and if possible, this is the way I want to get my oxygen from here on out.
All too soon he ends the most incredible kiss of my life, resting his forehead against mine. Our eyes are connected and a soft smile is forming on my lips, downplayed by the megawatt one on his.
“Be mine Luna and I’ll wait for you, just say you’ll be mine.”
I’m captured and I don’t want to break away but I can’t say yes, knowing that while he’s waiting for me, I will be here. I won’t be waiting and I will be fucking and exploring whoever calls for me on that day. It isn’t fair to anyone, especially not Cole.
“No,” my words make his eyes seem watery, but he doesn’t pull away and I carry on. “I don’t expect you to wait three years for me Cole, I know you have needs,” my cheeks are aflame and I can’t stop my eyes from dropping to the floor.
His hand comes beneath my chin and he lifts my head up so I’m looking at him, it’s reminiscent of the past and it hurts to remember it.
“Luna I’m twenty-eight and I won’t lie and say I’ve been a saint this entire time. I’ve had my fair share of casual hookups and the odd relationship thrown in and it didn’t mean a thing. I’m ready for something real and I don’t think it can get anymore real than you. Three years is nothing if it means that I get to be with you at the end of it.”
His voice is gutting me and it’s making it so much harder, because I don’t want to argue with him over this. I want him to be mine and I hate how selfish that makes me.
“You’ll be okay, waiting knowing that I’m in here. Being used by whichever guy decides he wants a go at me. Knowing that I’ll be opening my mouth and my…” his hand presses against my mouth and I stop talking.
“I know what goes down in here and I know what… could happen with you. I know it and I still choose you, I just don’t want to hear about it. Denial will be my best friend for the next three years and at least I can still see you, we won’t have to be apart for the duration.”
“Are you sure?” I ask and he nods his head as I push to my feet, slide my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck and capture his mouth with mine.
I pull back sooner than I’d like but words are needed here, “I want to be yours Cole, just give me some time.”
His smile is hopeful as a sound registers and he springs away before dropping behind his desk and picking up a file, I’m so confused until the door opens and Aeron walks in. Bastard.
“What do you need Aeron?” he asks, with more disdain than I was expecting and my mouth pops open. Although I flinch when Aeron places his fingers beneath my chin and closes my mouth for me.
I don’t miss the way Cole narrows his eyes at the action, but Aeron isn’t looking at him, luckily. My eyes look into Aeron’s and the stupid smirk spreading across his perfect face.
“I’ve just come to let you know that Luna is not required to have the rod yet, so she comes with me.”
&nbs
p; “What are you talking about? Regardless of the rules of this damn place, the well-being of these girls is always my first priority. You know what Sir will do if she winds up pregnant and we both know the majority of you won’t think to cover up,” he snaps out, his fists clenching on the desk as the file falls discarded on the floor.
My stomach bottoms out as everything clicks into place, I’m here to get my contraception taken care of and Aeron isn’t allowing it to happen.
“No one will be fucking the Little Zero for the foreseeable future, so she doesn’t need it,” Aeron throws back, as he stands in front of my chair, grips my hips and pulls me into his firm chest.
“People change their mind. She is getting protection.”
“The Prince has declared it, no one is to sleep with her. You should know better than anyone that no one denies the Prince,” Aeron retorts, looking over his shoulder at Cole, my Cole.
“I know as well as you that not everyone follows the rules, what the Prince doesn’t know, won’t hurt him.”
“I don’t understand, what is going on?” I ask hoarsely, wondering why I feel dejected all over again? It’s good news that I won’t have to spread my legs for them, isn’t it?
“The Prince doesn’t want anyone to explore you too thoroughly until he gets back, you get four months Thirty-Four. No one will touch you or claim you until then,” he pulls away and looks me up and down, before turning his full attention to Cole. “Don’t worry Coley, she’ll get it when she needs it. Things have changed since your time in the Academy,” his words throw me off but he isn’t giving me the chance to question them. Aeron grips my shoulders and leads me out of the room, and away from the only person in this place that I want to see.
Aeron wasn’t lying, they have made no demands of me and if anything, the Harkwright men seem to be giving me a wide berth. It’s like I have a contagious disease that will kill them instantly if they get too close. It wouldn’t bother me so much if the girls weren’t singling me out because of it. I didn’t ask to be ignored and shown this apparent ‘special treatment.’ If anything I’d prefer it if I was the one avoiding people, that’s my jam and I know how it plays. But this, it’s weird and I’m starting to worry that it may be dangerous for my health.
Two weeks since I saw Cole, two weeks since Aeron dropped the bombshell that I don’t require the rod in my arm. Two weeks of death glares and chills coursing down my spine. Two weeks and one day before everything falls apart and I’m left standing here without a clue as to what is going on and scared of what is about to happen.
Walking into my last class for today, after having snide remarks filtering throughout the mess hall and the other classes left me a little less observant I guess. How else did I miss the fact that there wasn’t a tutor at the front of the class or that the room was dimly lit with the blinds drawn closed? But no, I didn’t notice any of this, and I guess I only have myself to blame as the door slams shut behind me, and a fist connects with my face.
My bag falls to the floor as another fist connects with my stomach and I fold over as an intense pain courses through me. Worse than I’ve ever felt before, and I’ve been punched a few times. In the way that I’m almost immune to the pain. It’s why I don’t react or cry out, but this is new. I look up at the faces of Thirteen, Twelve, Eight and Four, the girl who was sitting on Tom’s lap when I found them in the garden.
“You think you’re better than us?” Four asks, and yep I renounce the urge to ever utter her name again. She wants to be as bad as this place then she can own that fucking number for all I care.
“No,” I spit out as I pull my back straight and narrow my eyes on her. “I don’t think I’m better than them, but I know I’m better than you,” yeah anger is a marvelous thing. Snapping my neck, I refuse to inspect my stomach. I don’t want them to know that they’ve injured me, because I know they’ve done something but the anger is making the pain recede for now.
“Eight, go and ensure no one tries to come in, actually take Twelve with you as well,” Four orders, believing that because her number is the lowest, she is better than us all.
They share looks before walking out and if anything, I think they looked relieved to not be directly involved in this beating I’m about to receive.
Thirteen comes closer, cracking her knuckles before driving it into my ribs and her face turns red when I don’t react. I just look at her, blue on blue and I know she wants this, she wants to hurt me, to wreck me. Silly girl, she doesn’t hold enough power to do that to me.
“I don’t know why you’re so angry, you get the attention. Isn’t that what you girls want? So desperate for the approval of monsters,” I don’t shy away like I usually would but they don’t know me. They don’t know what I went through my last years in high school and what Poppy taught me to survive.
I may be socially awkward and a stammering fool at times but I’m quick, smart, and I know how to throw a punch. I won’t win any competitions but I know where to hit to cause enough damage and it’s taking everything I have to not do that to these stupid petty bitches. No matter what they think, I’m not weak.
“You are so fucking stupid, it’s painful. I bet your family couldn’t wait to get rid of you,” Four throws out before stepping closer and I watch as her hand slides behind her back.
“You’re forbidden fruit, all eyes are on you and you don’t even deserve it. You’re nothing more than a fucking ghost and your eyes are way too big for your face, I really don’t see the appeal,” Thirteen declares, before spitting in my face and my eyes close to avoid any of it reaching them.
“Don’t worry little girl, soon you won’t just look like a ghost,” Four steps closer now, “you’ll be one.”
I watch as her arm jerks and I know she passed something to Thirteen, too cowardly to do it herself, her words aren’t lost on me. I’ve walked into my own murder site and the excitement in the girl’s eyes is what scares me the most. She’s vying for my blood and I’ve never even met her before, I don’t know what Four passed to her, but I know I’m about to find out.
“Take it like a champ Zero,” she puts extra emphasis on that, showing how derisive she finds the idea of me. “I mean, at least you can die knowing you had something inside you,” my mind just… stops. I know Four is laughing but it doesn’t register, all I see is Thirteen stepping closer as her leg pulls up and she attempts to kick me in the stomach.
The thing is I’m light on my feet, it’s the benefit of being so small. It also means I’m quick and nimble to move out of her way, I don’t miss the hiss that passes through her teeth as she charges at me and I dodge her again. Only I’ve backed myself into a corner and the smile is back on her face. My eyes flick back to Four and she’s looking on in utter disinterest. I guess my dying is boring for her, I’m so sorry that it can’t be more entertaining for you, bitch.
“Don’t look at her, look at me trailer trash,” she slams her forearm into my chest and the air whooshes out of me.
Being able to read body language is a useful skill to have in any situation, especially if your life is on the line. So when I see her shoulder draw back, I have an inkling of what to expect. The glint of light on steel makes my stomach drop out and I raise my arm just in time as she brings the kitchen knife down. It cuts through my arm and all she gets for her effort is a gasp in acknowledgement. She looks pissed and I can only assume it’s because I’m not a whimpering mess or begging for my life.
The searing pain hurts like a motherfucker and I can only hold it in for so long. She pulls her arm back for a second time, but when she thrusts it down, I manage to grab the knife with my good hand. The blade cuts into my flesh but I’d rather that than me lying on the floor, bleeding out for their amusement.
She growls at me, actually growls like a dog or something. Ha, how fitting for this devious bitch.
She pushes the blade closer to my chest, but my hand can only take so much, so I kick her in the knee and fight the smile that threatens to form as she wh
impers. Only, instead of pulling away she pushes harder, I try to jerk away from the wall but she sweeps my legs out from under me until I’m lying on the classroom floor and she sprawls atop me. Her body weight pushes down on the handle and I feel as the blade pierces through my top and nicks my skin.
My eyes sink closed as I consider the ramifications of the only choice I think I have right now, I don’t want to hurt her and it might not even work, but I won’t just lie here and take it. The knife slices deeper into my hand as I tighten my grip, then with the last of my strength I manage to pull my near dead, injured arm up and slam it into the side of her head. Her screech would be comical if my life wasn’t on the line, add that to my blood matting on her hair and her weight lessens slightly on the blade. One last move and it’s my only chance, please just let go and move the fuck away.
I push at the blade, driving it further into my hand and it slices down my stomach, before finding a new body to cut. Her eyes shoot back to me as it lines up to her abdomen.
“Just let it go,” I beg, refusing to push the blade in and I think she’s going to. I can see the fear for her life shining in her eyes, and I know we’re both going to walk out of here alive.
“Come on Candice, just fucking do it,” Four sneers as she puts her foot onto her back and pushes down, driving the knife through her stomach and pushing it in to the hilt.
She falls forward, Candice’s full weight pressing down on it. I can feel warmth seeping through the fabric of my top. Four is suddenly screaming out and it isn’t long until people are rushing inside and pulling her free from me. Her chest is barely moving and all I can do is squeeze my eyes closed, as I’m pulled into a pair of arms and carried away from the room.
13
Breaking All The Rules
I don’t know who carried me to the medical center or who stitched and bandaged me up; I was so far gone by the time I was found and the adrenaline had worn off. Even now, staring at my reflection feels as though I’m looking at a stranger. My pale face is worse than ever, they leached any color I might have had out of me that day, and the dark circles under my eyes are more prominent than ever.
