The Truth About Secrets

by L. P. Dover

  He shrugged and turned around. There was so much pain on his face, and all I wanted to do was run into his arms.

  “I don’t know,” he explained. “I was in a bad place. All I wanted was to find you. I even emailed you, but they all got sent back to me. I have all the drafts saved in my email that I can show you. Everything I tried didn’t work.”

  Mouth gaping, I stared at him, feeling more confused than ever. “Why wouldn’t they go through?” We’d emailed each other tons of times and never had a problem.

  He stepped closer to me. “It’s like you disappeared, Clara. When I asked your mother what was going on that’s when she said you’d decided to stay in France indefinitely. The only thing I could figure was that you’d changed your mind about being with me. And just like you, I thought you were too afraid to tell me to my face.”

  More tears fell down my cheeks. “That’s why you were such an ass to me this week, isn’t it? I couldn’t understand why you’d be that way when it was supposedly your fault our relationship failed.”

  He took another step closer. “I’m sorry. All I wanted was to rub it in your face how wrong you were to leave me. I was pissed at your for so long. It was one of the reasons why I busted my ass to make something of myself.”

  My heart hurt so bad it felt like it’d been ripped out of my chest. “Do you think this happened for a reason? What if we’d stayed together and never became as successful as we are now? You said it yourself, you busted your ass to get where you are.”

  Zac lifted his hands to my face, and I sucked in a breath as he wiped away my tears. “I don’t know what would’ve happened, but I do know that we would’ve been happy. It took a long time to get over you.” He lowered his face, his lips so close to mine. “That’s a lie,” he murmured, “I don’t think I ever did. It all came back the second I saw you.”

  “Same,” I cried, wrapping my arms around his waist. Our bodies touched, and I melted in his arms.

  A soft chuckle escaped his lips. “I want to kiss you.”

  “Then what are you waiting for?” When his lips touched mine, it was as if no time had passed. We were only eighteen when we separated, but I’d never felt that kind of love or connection with anyone.

  I opened myself up to him, completely wrapped up in the moment. His hands snaked around the back of my neck, pulling me in closer. I was lost in his embrace and I loved it. I loved it so much I didn’t even hear the back door open.

  “Whoops. Now that’s a sight I haven’t seen in a long time.”

  I could recognize Drew’s voice anywhere. Zac slowly pulled away from me, and we both laughed. He looked over at Drew and threw his hands in the air. “Seriously, dude. You had to interrupt us now?”

  Drew had the biggest grin on his face. “Sorry, man, I didn’t know you two had worked everything out.”

  Zac smiled at me. “We’re working on it.” There was still a lot we needed to talk about. We had twelve years to catch up on.

  “Glad to hear it,” Drew called out. “I knew things would work out between you two.”

  Zac’s gaze narrowed at him. “Really?”

  Drew nodded. “Yep. I had a feeling. You two didn’t just end up in Snowy Creek for no reason.” That was classic Drew, always having a feeling about something. However, he was usually right in his assumptions when a big snowstorm would head our way. He nodded toward the door. “I hate to mess up the reunion here, but people are looking for you, Zac. Everyone’s about to leave.”

  I pushed Zac toward Drew. “Go. We can talk later.”

  Grabbing my hands, he pulled me into him. “How about tonight? Come by my house after you leave here.”

  I squeezed his hands. “I’ll be there.”

  He disappeared inside with Drew but I stayed outside to catch my breath. So much had changed in just a matter of minutes, and I loved every second of it.

  Once everyone left the country club, I helped Maggie and the team break down the tables and put them away. Now I was on my way to Zac’s house with the window down to let the cool, night breeze flow through. It was pushing ten o’clock, so I pulled out my phone to call my parents. It sounded silly just thinking about it. I was thirty years old and calling my parents to tell them I wasn’t going to be home until late.

  I pressed the number for my mom’s cell and she picked up. “Hey, sweetheart. Did the party go okay?”

  “Yep. Had a heart-to-heart talk with Zac while I was there. I’m on my way to his house. Turns out he didn’t cheat on me. The picture Chelsea sent me was of a girl who stole Zac’s phone. That’s why I couldn’t get in touch with him all those years ago.”

  The line went silent for a few seconds. “Wow. Are you serious? It was all a misunderstanding?”

  Twelve years lost over something so stupid. Gripping the steering wheel, I sighed. “By the time he got a new phone, I’d already asked you to disconnect mine. I can’t believe I didn’t give it more time.”

  “You can’t blame yourself, Clara. You tried and that was all you could do.”

  “Still,” I said, “I let my anger cloud my judgment.” I was almost to his house and my stomach fluttered with nerves.

  “Are you sure it’s a good idea to go to Zac’s house? Aren’t you still with Adrian? I don’t think he’ll like you being alone with an ex.”

  My mother loved Adrian and it wasn’t hard to see why. He was a famous celebrity who was known around the world. He could get me into the life she gave up to be with my dad. What she failed to recognize after countless times of telling her was that I didn’t give a rat’s ass about being rich and famous. It didn’t bother me being in the background.

  “Adrian and I aren’t together right now, Mom. We broke up. Yes, he wants me back, but it’s not what I want,” I said, turning down Zac’s driveway.

  “And why is that?” my mom asked. “Because you want Zac?”

  My heart jumped at the thought, but so much time had passed. Our lives had taken two different paths for so long. “I think it’s too late for that,” I confessed. “Zac and I aren’t the same as we used to be.”

  My mother sighed. “Just don’t do anything stupid, Clara. Zac’s moving back here and you’re going to California. Long distance relationships never work.”

  “You’re getting a little too far ahead there, Mom. We’re just going to talk, that’s it.”

  “Okay,” she said, sounding as if she didn’t believe me. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

  We hung up, and I parked in front of Zac’s house. The front door opened, and Zac stood there, leaning against the frame. My lips still tingled from where he kissed me. Was it bad that I wanted more?

  I got out of the car and waved. “Hey. It’s not too late, is it?”

  Zac chuckled. “Not at all. Come in.”

  I walked up to the door, and he placed a hand on the small of my back as I went inside. My arms broke out in goosebumps and I hoped like hell he couldn’t see them. He shut the door behind us and he followed me into the living room.

  Zac nodded toward the couch. “Want to sit?”

  I shook my head. “Do you mind if we sit outside? It feels amazing out there tonight.” Plus, he had a double chaise lounger that was as big as a queen-sized bed with pillows and comfy cushions. It would be perfect for looking up at the stars on. That was one of the things I loved about Wyoming. You could see them so clearly.

  Smiling, Zac flourished a hand toward the patio door. “Lead the way. I’m sure you know where to go.”

  I smacked his arm as I walked past him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  He winked. “You can’t tell me you didn’t look around my house when I wasn’t here.”

  Opening the patio door, I hurried out into the darkness so he couldn’t see my flaming cheeks. “Of course not,” I said firmly. “Why would I do that?”

  Zac burst out laughing. “Yeah, yeah. Somehow I don’t believe you.”

  “Okay, fine,” I said, climbing onto the double lounger, “I couldn
’t help myself.”

  Zac sat down beside me, and we leaned against the pillows, his body so close to mine. Our legs touched as we stretched them out and I loved the feel of his warmth. “I knew it,” he teased. “I kept waiting for you to do something to my bedroom.”

  I nudged him with my elbow. “I thought about it, especially when you kept bragging about your damn dates.”

  His smile faded. “There were no dates, Clara. I said all of that just to piss you off.”

  A huge amount of relief flowed through my body. “It kind of worked. As much as I hated you, I despised the thought of you being with another woman.”

  He sighed. “You weren’t my favorite person either. I know it was childish, but I wanted to make your life miserable.”

  I scoffed. “Oh, I know. I fell in horse shit because of you.”

  The laugh that came out of him was so loud it echoed in the distance. “And it was really damn funny watching it, too. Then again, you caught me by surprise when you took off your clothes.”

  I knew exactly what that did to him. It gave me great satisfaction, too, seeing him hot and bothered. We both laughed, and I leaned into him; it felt so natural. “I’m glad all of that’s over. I was miserable trying to get revenge on you.”

  “Same,” he agreed in all seriousness. “You don’t still hate me, do you?”

  I looked right into his heat-filled hazel eyes. It was dark outside, but the moon gave off the perfect glow. “No,” I murmured. “In a way, I hate myself for thinking you’d ever hurt me. I should’ve known you wouldn’t. I let my anger get in the way.”

  “It’s not your fault, Clara. We were young and impulsive. You let your anger get the best of you, and I let my self-doubt get the best of me. I honestly thought I wasn’t good enough for you.”

  The pain in his voice made my heart break. “You were always good enough for me, Zac. I loved you so much.”

  He caressed my cheek. “I loved you, too. And I’m sorry for everything, especially your dad. I feel like such a dick for treating you the way I did. If I knew what you were going through, I wouldn’t have been like that.”

  Eyes burning, I laid my head down on his shoulder. “I wish I knew how long he had. That’s why I’m staying in Wyoming for the summer. He had his first chemo treatment this week. He’ll go every Tuesday for three weeks, and then have one week off.”

  Zac gently brushed his hand up and down my arm. “If you need anything, I’ll be here.”

  We sat in silence for a little while, and it felt good just to be in his arms. “Do you have to go back to Charlotte?”

  He shrugged. “Yeah, eventually. I’ve got everything I need here for the time being.”

  “No girlfriends out that way you left behind?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood.

  “Nothing serious,” he replied nonchalantly. “I worked so much I never really had time to date.” I was the same. With all the clients I had, I just busied myself in their lives. “What about you and Adrian?” he asked, shifting his weight.

  Leaning back, I met his gaze. There was a hint of jealousy in those eyes of his, and I didn’t take joy in it. “There is no me and Adrian,” I admitted truthfully. “Just like you wanted to do with me, I only brought Adrian into this to piss you off.”

  “So there’s nothing between you two?”

  I shook my head. “Not for a long time.”

  “Is he still going to come out here and see you?”

  Eyes wide, I gasped. “Oh, my God. What am I going to do? I told him to come.”

  His jaw clenched. “Do you want him here?”

  There was no doubt whatsoever in my mind what my answer was. Cupping Zac’s cheek, I kissed him. “No, I don’t.”

  The smile that lit up his face made everything inside of me clench. “Then you should probably tell him.”

  “Tell him what?” I asked, gazing at him curiously. I knew what I wanted to hear.

  He moved the pillow out from behind me and covered me with his body. My heart raced and I looked up at him. The way he looked at me was the same way he would all those years ago.

  “Tell him you’re not interested anymore.” He bent down and kissed my neck, nipping me with his teeth. I bit my lip to keep from moaning. “Tell him you found somebody else.” He kissed his way down my neck to the tops of my breasts. “Is it not the truth?” he asked, meeting my gaze.

  I didn’t know what to say. Things between us had moved so fast. “What are we doing, Zac? Are we just going to pick up where we left off?”

  His lips closed over mine, kissing me deeply. I couldn’t think straight with him doing that. He broke the kiss and stared down at me again. “We don’t have to pick up from anywhere, Clara. We can start all over.”

  The thought tempted the hell out of me. Could it really be possible? “Do you honestly think it’s that easy?” I murmured.

  Zac brushed a thumb over my lips. “It can be. I’ve wanted you for as long as I can remember. All you have to do is say yes.”

  My heart knew what it wanted. There was no denying it. Grabbing his face, I pulled his lips down to mine. “Yes,” I whispered breathlessly. “I want this. I want you.”

  The low growl that escaped his lips made my body tighten in all the right places. “Does that mean what I think it means?” he asked.

  Taking his hand, I placed his fingers on the side zipper to my dress. “I’ll let you figure that out.”

  His eyes darkened, and he slowly lowered the zipper to my strapless black dress and over my bra. Keeping his eyes on mine, he slid my dress down my body. The breeze blew across my heated skin, and all I could think about was feeling him inside of me.

  He moaned deep in his chest when he gazed down at me with his sexy hazel eyes, licking his lips. Kissing the mounds of my breasts, he lowered the fabric over one and began to suck on my taut, sensitive nipple while reaching behind me to unclasp my bra. He shoved it away, still keeping his lips enclosed over my breast. The need to have him grew more intense with every touch.

  It was strange how my body responded to him, almost like I was starved for his touch. My underwear was soaked and I was so close to letting go. Fumbling with his jeans, I tried desperately to get them undone so I could wrap my fingers around his cock and feel it pulsate with my touch. Zac helped me out and kicked off his jeans once I had them undone. As soon as he was free, I took him in my hands and squeezed, pumping him up and down.

  “Fuck, that feels good,” he groaned. “I’ve missed this.”

  “So have I.”

  Harder and faster I stroked his length, enjoying the satisfied rumble in his chest.

  With his arm around my waist, he moved me up the chaise lounge and took off my underwear so he could spread my legs wide with his knee. Keeping his gaze on mine, he kissed me gently at first and then harder as he pushed his fingers inside of me. Gasping from the sensations, I opened wider for him, loving the sound of his satisfied moans.

  “Harder, Zac,” I begged, spreading my legs wider.

  He did as I said, and as soon as he did it was my undoing. Tightening around his fingers, he bit down on my lip and sucked as I cried out in pleasure, riding the waves of my orgasm. Slowly, he rubbed my sensitive clit with his thumb and swirled his fingers in the wetness between my legs. Keeping his gaze on mine, he traced my nipples with my desire, leaving wet trails in his wake, and sucked them both greedily. My body craved him, even more now that we had so many lost years to make up for. I could feel his cock pressing closer to my opening, and as soon as he pushed in just a tiny bit, I gasped.

  “I love the noises you make. It’s so fucking hot,” he growled low.

  Almost instantly, he pushed inside of me … hard. I bit my lip to keep from screaming out. Wrapping my legs around his waist, I rocked my hips along with his and held on tight, biting my lip more with each thrust. The muscles in his back tightened and flexed as he worked his body into mine. I raked my nails down his back, to his ass, loving the way it hardened with each thrust. />
  I was so close to losing it again, my body clenched achingly tight around his cock.

  My breaths came out as pants as the ache between my legs grew stronger, wilder. We were both so close, and the moment I tipped over the edge I dug my nails into his back just as he gripped onto me tighter, plunging in as deep as he could and filling me with his release. Breathing hard, he took my face in his hands.

  “Please say you’re staying with me tonight. I’m nowhere near done with you.”

  I leaned up and kissed him. “I’m not going anywhere.”

  18

  Zac

  Last night was the best night I’d had in a very long time. Having Clara in my arms again was something I never thought would happen. We fell asleep outside, and when I woke up this morning, I carried her inside to my bedroom. She was so beautiful. After last night, it made me wonder what the hell we were doing. Her life wasn’t in Wyoming anymore.

  Clara used to love pancakes, so I made her some and heated up the syrup. It was crazy that after twelve years, I still remembered everything about her. I was almost done with all the pancakes when my phone rang. After flipping the last pancake, I grabbed my phone off the kitchen counter. It was Haven.

  “Good morning,” I greeted happily.

  She giggled. “Good morning to you, too. I see someone’s in a good mood.”

  “Yeah, well,” I said, scooping the pancake onto the plate with the others, “I had a good night.” I carried the plate of pancakes over to the kitchen table, then grabbed the bowl of strawberries out of the refrigerator.

  “I bet.” She laughed. “Drew told me about catching you and Clara kissing outside during the party. Guess you two made up last night?”

  I smiled. “I think so. She’s asleep right now.”

  “Well, I was calling to see if you wanted to grab breakfast, but it looks like you’re busy. Drew and I are headed home early today. Penelope begged us to come home, and you know how Drew’s wrapped around her little finger. Hell, I am, too.”