In Too Deep

by Taryn Belle

  Through the bioluminescence, Nicola’s flashlight picked out a dark shape swimming beneath her. She gave a start and then pulled her face out of the water.

  The shape was human.

  There was a splashing noise beside her, and then a head popped out of the water. The mask was pulled off, and there was Alex. Nicola’s eyes widened as she treaded water. “What are you doing? You shouldn’t be out here at night by yourself.”

  “I’m not by myself. I’m with you. What could be safer than that?”

  “But you’re afraid of the ocean.”

  “Not anymore.” He paused. “Okay, maybe a little, but it was worth it to see you. I knew you’d be out here. What kind of impression would I have made if I’d just waited for you on the dock?”

  Nicola started to turn away.

  “It’s taken care of,” Alex said quickly. “I just wanted you to know. We’ve got all the footage secured.”

  Nicola felt relief wash over her body. Taken care of. Thank God. But it didn’t change things between her and Alex.

  “Thank you for telling me. I’m going back in,” she said, and started swimming toward the dock. She climbed the ladder when she got there and scrambled onto the wood. Alex had left two fluffy folded towels for them—a step ahead of her. She looked away from them and hugged her arms around herself.

  “Don’t worry, I won’t take it as a sign of forgiveness if you take one,” Alex said, hauling himself out of the water. He reached for a towel and handed it to her. “Warm yourself up.”

  The night air was cold on Nicola’s skin. She took the towel and wrapped it around herself gratefully. “Thanks.”

  Alex held his own towel around his shoulders. The light was dim, but she could still see the aqua shine of his eyes. “I wanted to tell you something else before I left,” he said.

  Nicola’s heart gave a little lift. Goddamn it—sometimes she wished her body could lie to her as well as her mind. “What is it?”

  “I bought the rights to your tape. The deal included all rights going back five years. Brissoli doesn’t know it yet, but let’s just say he was a little distracted when he signed the contract and maybe he didn’t read the fine print. That footage, along with anything else pornographic and slanderous, is in the process of being pulled off the website’s servers as we speak. And the first thing I’m going to do when I get back to LA is get you a lawyer. You were underage when that tape was made, which means Brissoli was distributing child pornography.”

  “Wow,” Nicola said, pulling her towel more tightly around her. “Thank you.”

  “I know it might be too little too late, but...”

  “No, really—I’m very grateful.” She smiled. “It’s one of the nicest things anyone has done for me.”

  Alex hesitated, and then he took a step toward her. “Nicola—”

  “No,” she said with a quick backward jump. It was imperative that they had no physical contact as her heart ached so much she feared that a single touch might reduce her to tears—or worse, forgiveness, the one thing she could not afford. “I—I can’t do this. I talked to my brother in Chicago today. There are two planes out of here each day. You’re on the first one, and I’m going to be on the one tomorrow evening.”

  “Tomorrow?”

  “I came here with one suitcase, Alex. Kiki can get another roommate. Rusty will understand. He has other instructors.”

  “But why? Brissoli? He won’t be back—”

  “It’s not that. This place is tainted for me now. It seems to be my thing—I have a life, it goes all wrong, and suddenly I need to get out of Dodge.” She gave a humorless laugh. “I’m getting well practiced at starting over.”

  “You mean running away.”

  Nicola’s eyes flashed at him furiously. “Why would I stay? What’s left here for me?”

  “A lot. Your friends, your students, your diving—your life. Have you ever stopped to ask yourself if running really solves anything? What if you just chose to stand your ground, come what may?” Alex caught her eye, and when he spoke again his voice was thick with emotion. “And what if you let me stand beside you while you did it?”

  No. She would not weaken, no matter what her heart was screaming. Nicola held his gaze for a moment, and then she shook her head. “That would mean you staying here—and the last time we talked, you made it clear you were going back to the real world. Unlike me.”

  Alex heaved a sigh, and for one dreadful moment, Nicola thought he was going to walk away.

  And who could blame him?

  But he didn’t. Instead, he moved a little closer to her. “Do you remember when we got off the boat after our second dive together? When you wouldn’t let me carry those tanks for you?”

  “Yeah.” Nicola couldn’t help a tiny smile.

  “That’s when I first knew I was falling for you.” Nicola’s heart stopped. She stood perfectly still. “And I can’t imagine that I’ll ever stop falling. I know you don’t want to hear this right now, but...” Alex grasped her shoulders. “I love you, Nicola.”

  Nicola felt her face growing warm in the cool air.

  I love you. Three words she’d never wanted to hear more badly than from this man.

  But she couldn’t accept them.

  She stepped closer to him, then she opened her towel up and used it to encircle his body. “Then make love to me,” she said softly. “And we can part ways with an amazing memory.”

  “But I don’t want—”

  She pressed her finger to his lips. “Shh...don’t talk. Please don’t talk. It won’t work between us. Just make love to me.”

  “So I give you my love, and you give me...?”

  “Whatever I can in the moment. I’m not trying to hurt you, Alex. I just think that whatever happened over the past week—the good and the bad—we owe each other a beautiful goodbye.”

  “But can’t we—?”

  Nicola’s lips stopped his words, and after a moment’s hesitation he opened his mouth to accept her tongue. He tasted like the salt of the ocean. She gently bit his lower lip while he pulled her body close to his. Then she took his hand and pulled him down the dock to the scuba shack.

  It was crowded inside the tiny room—a desk and chair, tanks lined up against the wall, wet suits hanging on hooks. It smelled like wet rubber. Closing the door behind her, Nicola threw her towel down on the hard wooden floor. The bright moonlight shone through the window, illuminating the room.

  “Nicola—” Alex tried one last time, but she covered his mouth in hers again, pressed her body to his and grabbed his ass firmly. She kissed him and then went for his neck, pressing her tongue into the sweet spot under his jaw where she could feel his pulse jumping.

  It was like something snapped inside Alex. He gave a low growl, and then he had her bikini top off with a single tug of the back string. Then his mouth was on her breasts, licking and sucking like he wanted to consume her completely. She moved her hips against his, feeling an animal heat pump through her veins. She’d never been gripped by such urgency before. She wanted Alex to ravage her, leave her skin marked so she could remember the feel of him for days to come. She wanted to give her entire body over to him, inhale his scent so she’d never forget it, taste his lips so she could dream of them as she fell asleep each night.

  “More,” she whispered urgently. “More.”

  She worked her fingers into his hair and pushed his head downward, thrilling at the feel of his rough stubble trailing against her skin. Once he was on his knees, he slid her bikini bottoms down and wrapped his arms around her thighs. Then he started licking her exactly where she needed it most, sending a chill up her spine.

  “God, you taste sweet,” Alex groaned, pushing her firmly back onto the towel, where she lay spread-eagle and open to him. Nicola barely registered the hard wood pressing into her back. Alex’s tongue came down
on her pussy again, making her moan as he flicked it across her clit and then pushed it inside her. Her breath was fast, loud, desperate for him. Her orgasm was starting to build, but she wanted more, much more, before she came.

  She grabbed Alex by the shoulder and coaxed him onto his back. Then she straddled his thighs and ran her hands over his perfect chest and arms, memorizing every muscle, and then trailed her fingers up and down his beautiful thick cock. She reached for a condom from her handbag and rolled it onto him while she looked into his eyes, which were wild with heated passion in the moonlight. Then she moved herself forward until her pussy was resting on his rock-hardness. Judging from the sound of his labored breathing, he was riding the same wave of desperate urgency she was.

  “Nicola, oh, God...”

  She was wetter than she’d ever been. In one smooth movement, she scooped her pelvis back and eased his head inside her. She slid his first three inches in and out a few times, teasing him, and then finally she dropped down until she’d completely enveloped him. Alex bucked upward, grabbed her hips and started to move. He thrust into her again and again as she moaned, overcome with exquisite pleasure. The hardness of the floor made his cock reach even deeper into her, bringing her orgasm ever closer. But she wasn’t nearly ready for it to be over, and neither was Alex.

  Clasping Nicola to his chest, he rolled her over until he was on top. She wrapped her legs around his hips as he moved inside her, taking their rhythm down to a slow and leisurely one, as if they had forever. Alex pulled away so he could look down at Nicola’s face, and then he brought a hand to her cheek. “Never forget how we feel together right now,” he whispered.

  “I won’t. I promise,” she whispered back. Tears pricked at her eyes, threatening to spill, but she fought them away. And as her sadness faded, it was replaced by a fresh rush of desire.

  As if perfectly attuned to her, Alex’s lips crushed to hers in a long kiss, and then he rose up on his hands and started driving into her harder and deeper. Nicola could feel his urgent need for her with each sweet thrust. Her entire body broke out in goose bumps that had nothing to do with the temperature in the shack. “Alex. Oh, Alex...”

  Her climax was so near now. She let her eyes pass from his muscular arms to his torso, shiny with sweat as he pushed into her, down to the erotic place they were connected, and then back up to his eyes, which were still fastened to hers.

  “Don’t stop. Please don’t stop,” she begged him.

  “Not until you come on my cock,” he promised her between gasps.

  Nicola moved her legs together so her thighs were touching, and Alex groaned as her pussy tightened around him even more. And then Nicola arrived with a cry, riding the crest of the most intense orgasm she’d ever felt, shattering her world into a million beautiful pieces. A second later Alex gave a gasp and then went rigid as he emptied into her, his body exploding into heavenly bands of heat that shook him to his very soul.

  After they’d recovered slightly, Alex dropped onto his side, taking Nicola with him so he could hold her close to him. She buried her face into his chest, and both of them were silent as their breathing returned to normal. Alex’s skin smelled like the sea mixed with his sweat. She could hear his heartbeat through his chest. Nicola kept her eyes closed, willing the moment to never end.

  Finally, Alex spoke. “How can I ever give this up?”

  You don’t have to, Nicola almost said, but she caught herself.

  No. It simply wasn’t going to work, no matter how much they both might want it to. Their chemistry might be combustive, but there were still too many odds stacked against them.

  Different cities. Different lives. And though she knew deep down Alex was a good man, despite everything he’d done to prove himself, was he really going to change his business dealings for good?

  Nicola pulled herself away and looked at Alex’s face in the moonlight. She ran a hand through his hair. “That was the perfect goodbye,” she said sadly. “But it was goodbye.”

  She got to her feet and found her swimsuit, pulled it back on, and grabbed her handbag. Alex didn’t move, just stayed lying on the towel as he watched her prepare to leave him for the last time. Nicola dropped down on her knees and lowered her face to his, gazing into his eyes for a moment, and then she gave him a gentle kiss.

  She stood up and left the shack.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  ALEX SAT LISTLESSLY in the passenger seat of the golf cart, listening with half an ear as Dev, who was driving, recited his upcoming tour schedule to him. “...European dates end in late October, then I’m on to Australia, and then I kick off the North American leg in Los Angeles. January eighth, I think. I should have a day in LA before the first show, so that could work,” Alex caught. He only realized Dev had stopped talking when his brother gave him an energetic punch on the arm.

  “What was that for?” Alex asked irritably, rubbing his biceps.

  “Have you heard a word I just said?”

  “You were giving me your tour dates.”

  “And suggesting we spend a day together before my show in LA. But if you’d rather not...”

  “No!” Alex said quickly, cutting off Dev’s go-to passive-aggressiveness. He and his brother may have made some positive strides in the past few days, but some things would probably never change. And Alex was learning that that was okay—their relationship didn’t need to be perfect to be good. “I’d love to,” Alex said. “I’m sure you’ll be booked in at some palace, but how about staying with me instead?”

  Dev gave him a satisfied nod.

  Alex suppressed a sigh as they passed the island’s one and only sign for the airport. Dev glanced at him sideways. “That bad, huh?”

  “Worse. Not only have I lost the love of my life, I’m also going back to a job I hate.” He stopped short. It was a strong word to use, but in that moment Alex realized it was true.

  Dev was silent for a moment and then, “You know, I’ll admit I’ve never given much thought to how hard it must be working in the family business. Taking the reins from Mom—that’s a lot of pressure.”

  “You don’t have to tell me.”

  Dev shook his head. “I couldn’t imagine having a career I didn’t enjoy.”

  “I know you couldn’t—and I mean that in a good way. I’ve always admired you for pursuing what makes you happy, no matter what anyone else might think.” They rode in silence for a few moments, and then Alex began to smile.

  “What is it?” Dev asked, giving him another sideways glance.

  “I’m going to quit.”

  “Are you crazy? Dad will fucking freak!”

  Alex laughed. “You sound like the old me. Who cares—he’ll get over it. What choice does he have?”

  Dev shook his head. “Good on you, man.” They both fell silent again as they bumped over the dirt road, and then Dev cleared his throat. “Hey, I meant to tell you. I get that the whole Starfucker thing wasn’t really your fault, okay? I’m glad we worked together to fix it.”

  “Is that your way of apologizing?”

  “You know me—I never apologize. I just open the door for others to tell me I’m forgiven.”

  Alex laughed dryly. “Same old Dev. You know, I guess I have to admire that. You’ve always known who you are—and screw the world if they don’t like you.”

  “Plenty don’t.”

  “You think so? I don’t,” Alex lifted his hand to the roll bar. “Can I ask you something?”

  “Ask away.”

  Alex took a breath. They’d never talked about what he was about to bring up, and he was pretty sure Dev wouldn’t like it. But if he’d learned anything over the past week, it was that subjects left unspoken did much more harm than good. “The day I almost drowned. I remember it clear as day. I was working on a sandcastle while you danced around it, and I kept yelling at you that you were going to break it. Mo
m left to go do something and asked you to watch me until Dad got there.” Alex stole a glance at Dev’s face, but he was staring straight ahead with an unreadable expression. “No one told me not to go in the water. So why did you lie to Dad? You told him that Mom forbid me to go in the water, but I disobeyed. I mean, I get that you didn’t want to get in trouble, but I nearly died. Wasn’t that enough of a punishment for me?”

  Dev sighed. “Hey. You and me, we’re pretty different, right? You’ve always been so self-assured. I guess I envied that. Still do, if you want to know the truth. Me—I’ve always needed an audience. I guess I measure my value...externally. And you measure yours internally. That day...my friends were there. I wanted to impress them. I had this air-guitar thing I’d been working on, and they started chanting—‘Twitch, Twitch’—and it sounds pathetic, but it was kind of like a drug. I always knew I wanted to be a performer. It’s my strength, but it can also be my weakness. That day it was. I was more concerned about what they thought of me than I was about my own little brother. When Dad came at me... I guess I was embarrassed. Ashamed. You always did everything right, and I was always the one who needed to be ‘corrected.’ So I threw you under the bus.”

  Alex couldn’t help but chuckle. “I’m not as self-assured as you might think. And in case you hadn’t noticed, it’s you who could do no wrong in Mom and Dad’s eyes after you hit it big. Now I’m the one trying to do whatever I can to get Dad to throw me a bone.”

  “Not everything’s a competition.” Dev shrugged.

  “That’s easy to say when you’re always the winner.”

  Dev finally turned to look at Alex, and his face looked genuinely surprised. “Then I think we live in two different realities. Whenever I talk to Dad, he’s always going on about what a great job you’re doing running Echelon. I always hang up feeling like the shitty ‘artistic’ son.” He made quotes in the air.