White Lies

by Autumn Jones Lake

  Charlotte hugs Heidi. “Your first house is a big deal.”

  “I’m glad you’re here.” Heidi hugs her back.

  “No!” Alexa yells, squirming for Teller to set her down. “Pop-pop!”

  She runs over and slams into Rock’s legs and he scoops her up.

  “What’s wrong?” he asks.

  “Don’t wanna,” she wails and buries her head against his shoulder.

  Heidi bites her lip.

  While I hate seeing Alexa distressed, her tantrum’s also funny as hell. It’s so damn cute, I’m not even offended she ran to Rock to save her from the evil new house.

  “Come on,” Rock encourages in the gentle voice he reserves for Alexa and Grace. “You’re a big girl.”

  “You’ll be over all the time,” Hope adds.

  “No!” Alexa reaches out, opening and closing her hand until Hope grabs her little fingers. “Gracie,” she sobs.

  “You’ll see Grace all the time,” Hope promises.

  Alexa bawls even harder. “Noooo.”

  “She’s breaking my heart,” Hope whispers, snuggling Grace even tighter in one arm while hanging onto Alexa’s finger with her free hand.

  “Your place is all she’s known.” While Teller sounds rational, his face is all anguish as he watches Alexa’s meltdown.

  “She’ll be okay.” Heidi takes a deep breath like she’s trying to convince herself. I reach out, curling my hand around hers.

  “Let’s go upstairs. She’ll calm down.” Heidi and I lead the way. First stop is Alexa’s room.

  “Look,” Rock says, trying to get Alexa’s attention. “This is all yours.”

  Her sobbing has stopped but she shakes her head no and won’t look at any of us.

  “Wow!” Charlotte uses her high-pitched-totally-amazed toddler voice. “Look at those unicorns.”

  Alexa finally picks up her head. “Uni-corn?”

  Teller holds out his arms. “Uncle Carter’s been working hard on all these paintings. Come see.”

  Rock sets her down, and Alexa swipes her hands over her damp cheeks a few times. “Okay.”

  Teller takes her hand and walks her over to Carter.

  “We’ve got unicorns and mermaids in this section.” Carter does his best museum tour guide impression and points up to the ceiling. “And up here we have butterflies.”

  “Butter-fries?” Tears forgotten, Alexa whips her head up to stare at the ceiling. “Ooo!” She wiggles away from Teller and takes Carter’s hand, so he can show her all the different paintings.

  “You like it?” Heidi asks.

  Alexa nods and goes back to admiring the bookshelves, which Carter decorated with paintings of books and ivy leaves. Even Alexa’s little walk-in closet has rainbows and a few hidden fairies.

  When he finishes the tour, I shake Carter’s hand. Alexa’s still exploring and admiring all the artwork. “I don’t think we paid you enough, brother. Thank you so much for all the time you spent.”

  He blushes and presses his hands to his temples. “Seeing her go from tears and not wanting to move in to,” he gestures to Alexa who’s now busy crawling along the floor, checking out every little detail, “is amazing.”

  “I have a feeling you might have found a new side-hustle, Carter,” Hope whispers. She pats Grace’s back and raises an eyebrow.

  “Custom bedrooms for spoiled biker-kids?” Teller jokes.

  I reach over and punch him. “Who you calling spoiled?”

  “Me!” Alexa yells, flinging her arms around my legs and smiling at me. “Pick me up, Daddy,” she demands, proving her uncle’s point.

  Heidi

  I’m thrilled to finally have my own home with Blake. A place to put down the roots I never had as a child. Still, there’s a lingering sadness at leaving Rock and Hope’s. Every time I walk through their front door, I’m filled with a sense of belonging so intense it’s hard to imagine leaving.

  My grandmother’s never felt like a home because a little piece of me always hoped my mother would come back for me.

  Even though I loved him for renting a place close to my high school, the apartment I shared with my brother after my grandmother’s death always had an expiration date.

  Campus housing with Axel. Our apartment in Alaska.

  None of them were ever home.

  Have I even earned this?

  Blake’s the one who has put in the hard work. Built parts of the house with his own hands. Spent a fortune making every detail perfect.

  There’s no way I’ll voice any of my childish emotions today.

  Still, I think Blake knows.

  While everyone’s busy admiring Alexa’s room, Blake takes my hand, and we walk down the hall to the master bedroom, closing the door behind us.

  “You okay?” he asks.

  “She had me worried for a minute.” I gesture toward the door. Alexa’s tears always rattle me a little, no matter how normal they may be.

  His face breaks into a smile. “Carter saved the day. Guess I can’t pick on him anymore.”

  “You shouldn’t pick on him anyway.”

  “Seriously, you all right?”

  “I’m bursting inside.” I raise my arms, spinning in a half circle. “This is a dream come true and I feel so lucky…almost like—”

  “You don’t deserve it?”

  “Yes.”

  He steps closer and brushes my hair off my cheek. “You deserve everything and more.” His intense green eyes drill into me. “But I understand. There’s part of me that feels the same way.”

  “Really?”

  “Sure.” He flicks his gaze around the room. “You probably don’t remember what my mom’s house was like, but I think if you told me when I was a kid, I’d be living here one day, I would’ve thought it was a cruel joke.”

  “You’ve worked hard.”

  His eyes narrow, and his mouth twists in a playful way. “Have I?”

  “Okay, maybe not in the conventional sense, but yes.”

  “I want to give you everything.”

  “You already have.”

  Someone knocks on the door. “Really, guys?” Marcel calls out.

  Murphy reaches over and opens the door. “Creep.” He opens the door wider. “Come on in and see all the cool shit I did in here.”

  I elbow Blake and flash a play-along-with-me smile. “I asked Blake for a mirrored ceiling, but I guess it hasn’t been delivered yet.”

  “For fuck’s sake,” Marcel mutters.

  “She’s joking,” Blake says. “The mirrored ceilings are in the basement.”

  Marcel shakes his head. “You’re perfect for each other. Really.”

  Now that we’ve gotten teasing my brother out of our systems—for today anyway—Blake gets serious. “Furniture should start arriving this week. Then, I guess we’ll be ready to move in after the wedding.”

  “Nice.” Marcel opens one of the closet doors. “Jesus. Is this a closet or a nursery?”

  “Whatever Heidi wants it to be.”

  I step over to check it out and gasp. My apartment in Alaska would fit inside this closet. “I don’t think I have enough clothes to fill this. You even found one of those island drawer thingies for me?” I’d once mentioned that if I ever had a walk-in closet of my own, I’d like something similar when we were watching some home renovation show. Blake remembered. Every detail.

  I turn and press my hand against his chest, leaning up to kiss him. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  Fresh out of wisecracks, my brother ruffles my hair and slaps Blake on the back.

  Rock joins us and inspects the closet. Tests the rods, door hinges, drawers, and fittings. “Looks good.” He claps Marcel’s shoulder. “Let’s all sit down before we leave for the party.”

  I had no illusions our wedding dinner wouldn’t include some “club business.”

  In a way, I guess it’s reassuring.

  So many big changes are coming this week.

  But
at least a few things remain the same.

  Thirty-Two

  Murphy

  Every inch of Heidi’s long, beautiful, thick hair falls in spirals around her face and over her shoulders. No wonder it took so long for her to get ready.

  I’m struck stupid staring at her.

  I pick up one curl and gently tug. “I like this.”

  “Swan worked her magic.” She pats her hair. “Thought I’d try something different.”

  “Is this a wedding preview?”

  She twirls in place. The sheer layers of her short, gold dress billows out, showing off much more thigh than my sanity might be able to handle tonight. “My wedding dress is longer.” She tugs at her hair. “I’ll probably wear it up.”

  “Don’t. I like this.”

  “I didn’t think you had strong opinions on any wedding stuff.”

  “I have strong opinions about you.” I step back and look her over again. “Are those the boots Hope bought you?” She hadn’t let me see either of them yet, claiming they were wedding wear I wasn’t allowed to see. I’d been a good husband-to-be and hadn’t peeked inside the boxes, even though Heidi kept them stacked at the end of our bed where I nearly tripped over them almost every morning.

  “Yup. Aren’t they cute?”

  “They are.” They’re different for sure. Very Heidi. “You can’t ride like that though.” Just thinking of any harm coming to her long, smooth legs makes me shudder.

  Her mouth turns down. “I know. Hope and I are going down in the SUV with the girls.”

  “Figured. Rock wants to head down a few minutes early, anyway.”

  “Going to check out the place?”

  The corner of my mouth curls up. My girl knows us well. “Something like that.”

  I help her load up Rock’s SUV as much as I can before the guys start lining up, ready to ride down. A small stab of jealousy hits me. Wrath’s got Trinity on his bike. Teller has Charlotte. Hell, Swan’s even riding with Dex and Willow’s on the back of Sparky’s bike.

  But Rock’s riding solo, and I know Z will be, too. The sacrifices we make for our families.

  While I miss having Heidi at my back, the ride down the thruway helps clear my head. It’s a beautiful afternoon. I wish we were having the wedding today.

  Z’s leading his crew into the parking lot when we arrive.

  “Nice timing, brother.” He pulls me in for a hug and slap on the back. “Where’s the little hammer?”

  I huff a laugh at his new nickname for Heidi. “She’s driving down with Hope and the girls.”

  Lilly hops out of her car and gives me a quick hug. “She still doesn’t know, right?”

  “Still thinks it’s a wedding dinner,” I confirm.

  Chance knocks on the back window, and Z opens the door, pulling his son out, so I can say hi to him.

  “Let me go inside and check on things,” Lilly says. She takes Chance. Z’s eyes follow her the entire way.

  “Aw.” I slap his chest to get his attention. “It’s sweet you still have that whole honeymoon glow thing going on.”

  He scowls at me. “What are you? A fourth-grader in a grown man’s body?”

  “I don’t think fourth-graders say shit like, ‘honeymoon glow,’” Rooster says.

  “I didn’t think bikers did either.” Jigsaw waves his hands at me. “Yet, here we are.”

  “Why do I even miss you guys?” I ask, pulling Rooster in and slapping his back a few times. “Good ride up?”

  “Yeah, this is a great spot.”

  He glances at the restaurant, an over-sized monstrosity of a building designed to look like an old saloon. “We should buy this place and use it as a clubhouse.”

  “And call it what, Lost Kings Midstate?” Steer slaps Rooster on the back before coming over to shake my hand.

  “How you been, brother?” While Steer’s never been one of my favorite people, I got to know him better when I was helping Z run downstate, and he’s a loyal brother.

  “Not bad. Miss having your ginger ass bossing us around.”

  “Bossing? Who did I boss around?”

  Z grins at me the entire time his crew’s busting my balls. Neither Rock nor Teller come to save me from the verbal abuse.

  Wrath finally interrupts them by wrapping an arm around my neck and choke-hugging me half to death. I guess that’s a rescue of sorts.

  Heidi

  Hope and I drive down in Rock’s SUV with Alexa and Grace in the backseat. Grace mostly snoozes in her car seat. Alexa’s much more vocal, happily reading or trying to read most of the road signs.

  “I should’ve driven us in the Hellcat. You still haven’t seen it.”

  “Is it back yet?” Hope asks.

  “Not yet.” Will Hope think this is fun or silly? “You’ll have to come out to the racetrack with us one night. It was more fun than I thought it would be. And you’d really like Ella a lot, I think,”

  She gives me a half-smile without taking her eyes off the road. “I’m sure we’ll be venturing out that way sooner or later.”

  Her comment is enough to hint that Rock’s probably told her about the support club. I guess that means it’s moving forward. Even after the incident at Remy’s bar.

  “You’ll like Molly, too. She reminds me of me at her age. But a little louder.”

  Now she glances over at me. “You could be loud when you wanted to be.” She chuckles. “I remember the first time I met you. You burst into the clubhouse howling for your brother to talk to your grandmother about your curfew.”

  “What? I did not.” I frown, trying to remember the time she’s talking about. “Did I? Maybe,” I finally concede.

  When we arrive at the Steakhouse, a bunch of the guys are standing around their bikes, catching up. Blake jogs over to us, grabbing me and spinning us in a quick circle. “Miss having my girl on the back of my bike.” He keeps his hands on my hips when he sets me down. “You look so pretty tonight.”

  “Thank you.” I twist my fingers into the skirt of my dress. “I missed riding with you, too.” I glance around the packed parking lot. “Hey, that looks like my friend Dawn’s car.” I point to the black SUV.

  “Nah.” Blake shakes his head and opens the back door, blocking my view. He reaches in to unbuckle Alexa. “What would she be doing all the way down here?”

  He hands me Alexa’s bag and my purse before hauling Alexa out of the car. On the other side, Rock’s helping Hope wake Grace up from her nap. And Grace is not having any of it.

  “Gracie!” Alexa calls, reaching for her. “Momma, Gracie crying.”

  “She’s cranky about being woken up. Kind of like you are in the morning sometimes.”

  “Am not.”

  “Okay.” Blake chuckles.

  “Go on ahead, we’ll be right behind you,” Hope says, waving us toward the restaurant.

  We catch up to Rooster and Jigsaw on the stone patio around the front doors. “I don’t think any of the places we saw in the southwest were this southwest,” I say as Rooster opens one of the big, wooden doors to the Southwest Steakhouse.

  Inside the lighting’s muted. Peanut shells cover the floor. Country music rocks the speakers.

  “I’m starving,” Jigsaw announces. “There better be a cow or two out back with my name on them.” He winks at the hostess.

  “Rooster.” I nudge him with my elbow and jerk my chin toward a sign to our right. “Look who the featured artist is this month.”

  Shelby’s bright blonde hair and smile stare up at us from the sign, announcing that the playlists of every Southwest Steakhouse in the country would be featuring two Shelby Morgan songs from her new album.

  Jigsaw shakes his head, mutters something and turns away.

  Ignoring him, I nudge Rooster again. “How cool is that?”

  “Very cool.” He pulls out his cell phone and snaps a picture. “She said her manager scored that deal for her. Good to know he’s not totally useless.”

  After that, he walks a few s
teps away from our group, presumably to text Shelby and tell her we saw her picture. Blake’s arm settles over my shoulders, and he tugs me to his side. He leans down. “You trying to play matchmaker?” he asks against my ear.

  I tip my head back and grin at him. “They seemed to hit it off in Texas, no?”

  Blake glances over at Rooster. “Yeah, well, it’s not exactly going to work out with her on the road and him in New York.”

  “Isn’t that the biker way of life?” I tease. “Out on the open road and all?”

  “He’s our VP now.” Jigsaw joins our conversation and shakes his head. “This is so not like him.”

  “Aw, but they’re sweet together,” I insist.

  Jigsaw cocks his head. “There is nothing sweet about him.”

  Rooster walks up behind him and slaps Jigsaw’s shoulder so hard he rocks sideways. “Don’t be jealous. I’m sure some lonely waitress will be happy to go home with you tonight.” Jigsaw stalks off and Rooster grins at us. “Hey, I got my hands on extra tickets for Shelby’s show up at SPAC later in the summer. You two in?”

  “Oh, heck yeah,” I answer before Blake even opens his mouth. “We saw Dawson Roads last year. He puts on a great show. I can’t believe Shelby’s touring with him.”

  Rooster works his jaw from side-to-side. “Yeah. It’s a big deal.”

  Our hostess says it will be another minute until our room is ready for us. Lilly steps up and pulls her aside. Hope joins them and the three take off for somewhere in the back of the restaurant.

  “What’s going on?” I ask Blake.

  He grins at me. “No idea.”

  “Momma, look!” Alexa points at a miniature rodeo bull kids’ ride.

  Blake slaps a roll of quarters in my hand. “Knew these would come in handy.”

  Laughing, I take the quarters and Alexa over to the little bull. Chance runs over and joins us. The two of them get a few rounds in, and I’m down to my last five quarters before Blake returns and tells us it’s time to go.

  Alexa’s face screws up into her pre-meltdown scowl, and Chance hugs her. “Come on,” he urges.

  “Wait,” I glance at the empty hostess station, “Where’d everyone go?”

  “They’re down there,” Blake says. “You guys were having fun; I didn’t want to interrupt.” The corners of his mouth twitch as he says it, but I can’t figure out why.