Build-A-Harem- The Island Collection
Page 23
“You mean like Goku?” Jesse asked.
“Yeah, yeah, like Goku.” I replied as best as I could between ragged breaths, “There’s no way I can’t do ten pushups, is there?”
“I’m sure you’re just out of practice.” Red said soothingly as she got me up to my feet and dusted me off, “Now, squats.”
“What?” I wheezed.
“Squats,” Red repeated, “you do know what a squat is, right?”
“I know what a squat is,” I groaned, trying and failing to roll my eyes as they genuinely felt like they were going to roll into the back of my head, “I’m just sayin’ that that basically killed me.”
“Oh, don’t be dramatic,” Red scoffed, “everyone knows that Creators can work out… well, forever.”
“Uh, maybe some, but not me,” I said before turning my attention to Jesse, “tell her, I can’t.”
Jesse tilted his head from side-to-side as he thought it over for a few seconds before sucking his teeth, “She might actually have a point,” Jesse replied, “as far as I know, you can go forever.”
“I couldn’t do six pushups!” I exclaimed, feeling like the sudden exhalation had basically deoxygenated my blood.
“Yeah, but that don’t necessarily mean you can’t work out forever.” Jesse explained, “I’m guessin’ we’ll have to keep changing things up, but you’ll be able to work out for as long as need be, provided you can get past the mental hurdles.”
I looked between the two, hoping that my expression of complete disbelief would be enough to convince them that I was in no way able to go on working out, but they clearly weren’t changing their minds any time soon.
“Ugh, fine,” I grumbled before getting planting my feet at about a shoulder-width apart and putting my hands out in front of me, “but if this does kill me, I’m haunting your asses for life.”
“Wouldn’t expect anything less,” Red replied with a mildly condescending smile, “now go on, drop it like it’s hot.”
I’m not sure if it was because I was focusing so hard on keeping my balance and getting as low as I possibly could, but I totally missed the fact that Red was quoting lyrics that, as far as I knew, she shouldn’t know.
Great, now that song’s stuck in my head.
Freaking fantastic.
CHAPTER 20
Now, in case you hadn’t noticed, I’m not the kind of person who likes being perceived as weak or wimpy or insert some other insult, but after working out well into the night I couldn’t help but reach a point where I was as good as crying.
“When do we stop?” I wheezed for about the bazillionth time as I grunted my way through what I’m pretty sure was my thousandth sit-up of the day.
“When I get bored,” Jesse replied, “or when Red gets back from doin’ whatever it is she’s doin’.”
“I’m back,” Red called out as she came out of the water, signaling to me that I could flop onto my back and die, “how’s he been going?”
I felt fatter, sweatier, and all around worse than when I’d started, to the point where I saw absolutely no point in working out at all.
So, you can imagine how much it pissed me off when Jesse said “He was pretty freakin’ slow.”
“Screw…” I murmured before realizing I couldn’t get the rest of sentence out without someone giving me mouth-to-mouth.
“Where were you?” Jesse asked once he accepted I wasn’t going to finish my bitter growl.
“Just getting a lay of the land,” Red replied once she was on the shore, “figured it wouldn’t be a bad idea for me to see what waits in the waters. Figured I wouldn’t miss anything, so it was as good a time as any.”
“Well, you did miss the almighty Creator here vomit mid-star jump.” Jesse said with a smirk.
“You promised you wouldn’t tell.” I heaved out, unable to turn my head as my body accepted me stopping as meaning I was slipping into a coma.
“Yeah, well, it was too fun not to share.” Jesse chuckled, “You reckon he can stop now?”
“What do you think?” Red asked.
“Eh, I think we could get a few more hours out of him.”
“I swear to God I will kill you both.” I threatened more seriously than they thought, “I’m done. No more. Fin.”
“Baby.” Jesse chuckled, “But fair, guess you’ll want your reward with Red then?”
“No.” I replied flatly, still unable to move, “I mean… I mean I’ll definitely take you up on it eventually, but for now… for now I’m just goin’ to go ahead and lay down for a while.”
“Honestly can’t blame you for that,” Red said before coming to stand over me, blocking out my view of the stars, “you want to at least sleep in a bed though?”
“Yeah,” I sighed with a nod, the thought of standing up making my body preemptively ache, “I guess that’d be a good idea.”
I seriously considered just attempting to spawn a bed in below me, but before I got the chance to do that potentially catastrophic thing Red grabbed me by the hand and helped me up.
My legs, surprisingly, didn’t seem to have any trouble holding me up, and almost as soon as I was vertical I started to feel less dead.
“You okay?” Jesse asked with a concerned look.
“Yeah, why?” I replied confusedly.
“I don’t know, your eyes just sort of bugged out and I thought you were on the verge of having an aneurysm or, you know, prolapsin’.”
“Now why would he do a thing like that?” Red chuckled, giving us the first hint that she’d done something to me, “Oh, don’t act so surprised, I just gave him a bit of a booster.”
“A ‘booster’?” I asked before looking down at the hand she’d grabbed, “What do you mean a ‘booster’?”
“Just a little kick is all,” Red replied innocently, “trust me, it’s just so I don’t end up having to carry your drooling behind all the way back to shelter.”
I was about to say something about her not having any trouble carrying me around when she was waking me up, but I was interrupted by Cassie coming out of the jungle.
“Hey, Dax! Come here a second!” she called as she approached us, crossing the relatively short distance quickly and rendering her request moot.
“What’s up?” I asked, noting the rolled paper in her hand and the fact that she was wearing pants again.
“I finished the plan,” Cassie replied, offering me the paper which I promptly took, “I’ve got the materials we’d need and everything.”
I went to unroll what I was sure was going to be an amazing design, but was stopped just short of actually seeing it when the Toolbox did what it did with the map, sucking it into my hand with more force than I was prepared for.
Luckily, I didn’t get knocked off my ass and, as a result, didn’t embarrass myself.
“A new recipe, huh?” Jesse chuckled, “That’s definitely goin’ to come in handy.”
“What just happened?” Cassie asked with no small amount of sadness and shock in her eyes after seeing what would’ve been hours of work disappear.
“I think…” I said, lifting my hand up so that it faced the jungle, “it means I can do this.”
I was being deliberately coy of course, I knew what it was going to do.
Well, I thought I knew what it was going to do.
You see, instead of doing the thing where it just appeared, it came out as a semi-holographic semi-solid structure in the jungle, merging and unmerging with the terrain as it did so.
“What’s going on?” Cassie asked concernedly as my whole arm and the structure started to vibrate.
“I’m not sure,” I replied, matching her tone as the vibrations grew in intensity, “Jesse, any idea?”
“Nothin’ comes to mind, no.” Jesse said, not sharing out worry but instead sounding more awestruck, “You seen anything like this, Red?”
“Yeah,” Red replied, drawing our attention to the fact that she’d backed away from me by a considerable distance, “you two might want to
step away from Dax…”
Naturally, that upped my anxiety levels, but before I could ask Red to explain, the structure flashed red and launched into the air with an overwhelmingly loud horn, my hand following it without my say-so.
“What the Hell is going on!?” I shouted as I was abandoned by everyone.
“Just get ready to catch it!” Red called over.
Unsurprisingly, I didn’t know what she meant, but at the same time I knew that I wasn’t going to get a better explanation than that.
So, with more fear than I care to admit, I watched on as the mass of materials began to stack neatly high up in the air before launching at me with viper-like speed.
You ever have a meteor coming straight at you?
Well, imagine that, but with wood.
Lots and lots of wood.
CHAPTER 21
So there I was, damn ready to crap myself and watching as enough wood and stone to topple a building hurtled its way towards me.
‘Surely Red wouldn’t let me die, would she?’ I desperately internally rationalized as what was supposed to be a new house got closer and closer, ‘Would she?’
And then, right as I was about to close my eyes, a machinegun like kickback started to make my arm jerk around while I desperately tried to keep my hand facing the meteor-like block.
The Toolbox was absorbing it.
Then, after what felt like emptying an entire Thompson, it stopped.
The materials were gone and I was safe.
“Sweet monkey Christ…” I quietly muttered to myself as I tried to steady my shuddering chest with my hand.
“You okay?” Cassie called out.
“Yeah, yeah I’m okay…” I sighed with a breath of relief, “You guys coming over here or what?”
“We’ll come over as soon as we’re sure you ain’t goin’ to explode on us,” Jesse replied, “maybe give it a few more seconds?”
“Get your asses over here or I’ll shoot a fireball at you,” I light-heartedly threatened, “trust me, I’m not about to go ‘boom’.”
A quick look in their direction revealed that they weren’t so sure, but after a few more seconds of pretending they weren’t waiting to get blasted away with lumber they decided to slowly make their way towards me.
“That went well, huh?” Red said, smiling as if she hadn’t just been standing outside the ‘blast zone’, “I’m guessing it had something to do with all those trees being in the way.”
“That’s what I was thinking too,” I added with a nod as I thought about other games I’d played in the past and the wacky physics that occasionally came along with clipping, “so I guess we’ll just have to clear it, yeah? Maybe get rid of the original shelter too?”
Cassie let out a prolonged sigh at that before nodding dejectedly, “I s’pose, but it’s going to take a while with just us. Could use some extra hands.”
“Yeah, shame there ain’t some kind of employment agency, eh?” Jesse said in a failed attempt to make Cassie smile.
“What about the elves?” I asked without really thinking.
“Hmm?” Red replied.
“The elves,” I repeated, “I get the last thing we need, we get them to join the harem, bing-bang-boom, we’ve got extra hands on deck.”
Red shook her head at that and gave me an apologetic look, “I’m sorry, but you just aren’t ready to get the final piece of that particular puzzle.”
“Why not?” Cassie asked before I could, “I mean, he’s handled plenty of other stuff.”
This is a bit off topic, but it felt pretty awesome to have someone in my corner.
I hadn’t been feeling ganged up on at all up until that point or anything, it was just cool to get a little reminder that Cassie wasn’t just a part of the harem because there wasn’t any other game in town but because she actually liked me a bit.
Anyway, Red shook her head again, “He just isn’t ready. Don’t get me wrong, he can handle a lot, but this… it’s not something that’s based on his sexual prowess or anything, it’s just about his ability to detach himself during sex in order to reach a greater goal.”
“Are you saying I need to get better at being a prostitute?” I half-joked.
“No…” Red trailed off before making a curious expression, “Actually, yes, that’s more or less exactly what I’m saying.”
“It’s the world’s oldest profession,” I replied confidently, “I’m pretty sure I can handle it.”
Red made an unsure face, then another curious one, before finally settling on giving me a smirk, “Alright, if you want to go ahead with it, I guess we’ll just go ahead with it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you though.”
And, with that, I was suddenly in the air again.
Thankfully Red had gone with the ‘nicer’ option of grabbing me up under my arms before blasting off into the surprisingly cold night sky.
“Thanks for the warning.” I chuckled, hiding the fact that it was absolutely terrifying not having a hard surface under my feet.
“I thought it’d be fun to scare the other two,” Red replied as she hovered, each beat of her mighty wings wrapping a fresh blast of cold air around me, “now, where did I leave that girl..?”
“Leave a girl?” I asked confusedly before trying and failing to get a look at the jungle below, “Did you bring someone with you?”
“Just a turn of phrase,” Red said distractedly as she looked around the island, “I thought she was over there, but that’s closer to the shelter… Ah, there we go.”
And, with that, I was suddenly falling again.
Initially I was even more confident Red would catch me than the first time around, especially seeing as she’d already caught me once, but as I tumbled and struggled to keep my eyes on the ground I started to panic.
“She’ll catch me,” I murmured as best as I could before surrendering to my urge to lock my eyes shut, “she has to catch me…”
But she didn’t.
Not that it mattered though as, without warning, I’d slowed down and was floating.
That gave me cause for concern, mainly because I thought that there was a chance I’d died and was in whatever the game counted as the ‘Game Over’ screen, but then I opened my eyes and saw that I was in some kind of liquid.
It felt like water, yes, but there was something about it that had this sort of ethereal vibe.
Like, for example, it glowed.
It was cool though, I didn’t feel like I was drowning at all, and I had this distinct feeling of inner peace.
Then something rushed past my back and I became slightly less Zen.
“Oh…” I trailed off as best as I could underwater as the dominoes tumbled and I realized where I was, “oh no…”
It was too late though, the creature had come around to the front of me and we were face-to-face.
Let me tell you, reverse mermaids are even creepier up close.
I wasn’t about to run away at the first sign of trouble though, I knew Red was coming to save me.
And then it opened its mouth and let out a little bubble and, as much as it embarrasses me to admit it, I screamed.
I screamed and spluttered and swam as fast as I fucking could to the water’s edge and scrambled out of that mythical koi pond ready to run until my heart gave out.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Red asked as she came out from behind a tree, stopping me as I went to make my escape.
“I-I-I…” I stammered before shaking the cobwebs in my head loose, “Fish. I don’t want… fish.”
“See?” Red tsked disappointedly, “I told you you weren’t ready.”
“What does being anywhere near that… thing have to do with the elves?” I asked, hoping it couldn’t hear me.
“More than you’d think.” Red replied, “Remember when I said that you had to be able to separate yourself when doing the hanky-panky? Well, this is why.”
It should come as no surprise that it took me a while to realize what she was getti
ng at, undoubtedly because I didn’t want what she was saying to be true.
“You can’t be serious,” I said, sneaking a look behind me and kind of expecting to see the mermaid waiting, “please tell me you’re not being serious…”
“Afraid so,” Red sighed, “it’s alright though, we can just come back at some other time.”
Just like that, I decided I could detach myself.
“See you in a few minutes.” I said flatly, earning me a surprised look from Red who’d already started to turn away.
“Okay, my turn,” Red chuckled as I started moving towards the water again, “you can’t be serious.”
“I’m serious,” I replied, surprising even myself, “this is what’s best for the harem, so I’m goin’ to do it.”
Not going to lie, it felt kind of weird suddenly getting that attitude, like I’d finally maxed-out my points in some kind of personality skill, or at least hit the next tier, and had unlocked a new perk or something.
“Just make sure I don’t get eaten or anything, alright?” I said in an attempt to lighten the mood that only made me start to panic about the possibility of actually getting eaten.
“I’ll hang back, but yeah, I’ll keep an ear out.” Red replied, sounding almost impressed with what I was doing, “Are you sure you want to do this?”
“I don’t want to,” I chuckled meekly as I came to a stop about ten feet from the water, “but I have a feeling I need to if I want this little harem of ours to stop needing the ‘little’ prefix.”
“Heh, I guess I gave you too little credit,” Red let out with an amused huff, “good luck.”
“Thanks.” I replied flatly in order to hide the slight tremble I could feel in my throat. “See you in a little while…”
Red was already gone by the time I’d trailed off what I’d hoped was going to be at least a semi-prolonged goodbye, leaving me to look into the magical water with an undeniable sense of unease.
“He-hey…” I murmured as I caught sight of the pond’s occupant head bobbing along in the water, “I… Aren’t you a s-s-sexy one?”