Witches Just Want to Have Fun

by Amanda M. Lee

  “Well, that was a bust.” I wiped my sweaty palms on the seat of my capris and hopped into the driver’s seat of the golf cart. “I thought if we could find him that he might be able to give us an idea where to look. I guess that was a stupid thought.”

  “It wasn’t stupid.” Aisling fanned her red face. “But if you ask me you’re looking in the wrong place. We need to find your reaper. Odds are he already collected Jacob’s soul. That means we won’t be able to find it. If he hasn’t sent the soul to the other side yet, maybe we can convince him to release it long enough for us to talk to it.”

  Hmm. I hadn’t even considered that. “Do you think that’s possible?”

  “I think that’s about the only place we have left to look.”

  “Good point.” I tugged on my bottom lip as I considered our next problem. “I have no idea where this reaper lives. And I can’t remember his name.”

  “Adam Grimport,” Aisling supplied. “Galen said his name over dinner last night. I remembered it.”

  “Do have any suggestions about where we might find him?”

  “Actually, I do.” Aisling grabbed her oversized purse from the floor of the golf cart and rummaged inside until she came back with a tablet.

  “Are you going to call someone?”

  She nodded. “I’m going to call my brothers and see if they can run the information for us. The reaper network is standard. That means we have access to the address. We just need to get it and then you can program the address into your GPS and we’re good to go.”

  “You’re really good at this.” I smiled at her. “I’m not sure I would’ve even thought of that.”

  “Yes, I’m a queen amongst mortals.” Aisling smiled as she placed a Skype call on her tablet. The man who answered on the other end practically took my breath away despite the frown on his face when he caught sight of the person calling him. He was tall, his shirt off and hair wet. It appeared he’d just gotten out of the shower. He boasted Aisling’s black hair and purple eyes, and he looked as annoyed to see her as she was to see him.

  “Braden,” she growled, causing me to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing.

  “Aisling.” His voice was grim. “Why are you calling me from your honeymoon? If you think I want to sit here and listen to all the kinky stuff you’re doing with Griffin, you’re wrong. I know you might get your kicks from torturing me, but I refuse to listen.”

  “I don’t want to torture you, Braden,” she snapped. “I need some information.”

  He sobered. “For what? You’re supposed to be on your honeymoon. You’re not supposed to be doing anything that requires information.”

  “You’re not my keeper.”

  “You need a keeper,” Braden shot back. “I’m serious. “You’ve only been gone a few days. Did you miss us so much that you felt the need to call and torture us just so we wouldn’t forget what a pain you are?”

  “No,” she sneered. “I didn’t call for you. You just happened to pick up. Where’s Redmond? Or Cillian, for that matter? I’ll even take Aidan or Jerry over you at this point.”

  “I’m the only one here.”

  As if on cue, a second voice popped up from Braden’s side of the conversation and another Grimlock — this one with slightly longer hair and broader shoulders — grinned when he realized his sister was on the call and nudged Braden out of the way with his hip.

  “I thought I heard my name. Hey, kid. How is your honeymoon? And if you answer that with anything resembling a dirty remark I’ll rip Detective Dinglefritz’s head off when he gets back. By the way, Dad is still freaking out about you being pregnant. We’ve managed to calm him down a bit, pointed out that he’ll love spoiling a baby, but he’s still agitated, so I’d keep Griffin away from him for another couple of weeks.”

  Instead of being amused — like me — Aisling merely rolled her eyes. “He’ll get over it, Redmond. I’m not exactly happy about the situation either. I can’t drink on my own honeymoon and I couldn’t enjoy the boat trip he set up for us because they have rules.”

  Redmond’s smile slipped. “I’m sorry. That sucks. Do you want me to get Dad and have him place a call? He’s good at getting people to change their minds on stuff like that.”

  “It’s fine.” Aisling waved off the suggestion. “I got seasick the moment I tried to step on the stupid thing anyway. I think I’m better on bigger ships.”

  “Bigger is better,” Redmond agreed. “I’ve been trying to tell Braden that for years, but he argues the other side for obvious reasons.”

  “I’m going to beat the crap out of you for that,” Braden warned. “I’m not kidding.”

  “Hey!” Aisling clapped her hands to get their attention. “I hate to interrupt your little testosterone competition, but I need you guys to look up the local reaper on Moonstone Bay. His name is Adam Grimport.”

  “Why do you need a reaper address?” Braden asked as Redmond started typing on his phone.

  “Because a dude died here and we need to see if we can talk to his soul for a few minutes.”

  “But you’re supposed to be on your honeymoon,” Braden persisted. “You’re not supposed to be worrying about souls.”

  “Just ... mind your own business,” Aisling snapped. “I’m not asking for a big favor. It’s, like, two minutes of work. Give me a break.”

  “I’m telling Dad.” Braden folded his arms over his chest. “I’m serious. I’m telling him and you’ll be in big trouble when you get home. No more ice cream bars for you.”

  I was intrigued. “What’s an ice cream bar?”

  “Only the best thing ever,” Aisling said. “I’ll describe it for you on our way to Grimport’s house. Redmond, did you get the address?”

  “Yeah.” He returned to the screen and rattled off the information. I quickly input the address into my GPS. “Listen, Ais, I want you to have a good time and you’ve clearly made a friend so that’s good, but you’re supposed to be relaxing. Why aren’t you relaxing?”

  “Who says I’m not relaxing?”

  “I’ve met you.”

  She huffed out a sigh. “It’s fine. I’m hanging with Hadley, and we’re not getting into trouble. At least not major trouble. You have nothing to worry about.”

  “Hadley is hot,” Braden hissed, earning a grin from Redmond.

  “She is hot,” Redmond agreed. “Too bad we weren’t there with you. Then we could show her how real men operate.”

  “Oh, please.” Aisling rolled her eyes so hard I was surprised she didn’t tumble out of the cart. “Her boyfriend is so big he could crush both of you with one arm. Now stop being crude.”

  “If we’re not crude we have absolutely nothing to offer the conversation,” Redmond said.

  “Exactly. On that note ... .” Aisling reached for the button to disconnect the call and then stopped herself. “Do me a favor and tell Dad I’m having a good time, and that I said thank you for everything.” She was much more serious than she had been seconds before. “Tell him I’m sorry he’s so disappointed in me.”

  Redmond sighed. “He’s not disappointed. He’s just freaked out. He thinks he’s too young to be a grandfather. He’ll get over that quickly — you know he can’t stay mad at you — and you’ll be the favored child again before you know it.”

  “I hope so. I’ll want to be spoiled before this baby comes and sucks up all my limelight.”

  Redmond barked out a laugh. “Something tells me there’s plenty of limelight to go around. Either way, be safe, kid. Have fun. Don’t worry about Dad. Getting pregnant is one of the more normal things you’ve done, if you want to know the truth. Everything will be fine.”

  “I hope so.”

  “I know so. Have fun. Put this behind you ... and don’t get into trouble.”

  “I never get into trouble.”

  “Yeah, your hot friend Hadley is in for a world of hurt. It’s too bad. She really is pretty.” He winked at me and then waved. “I’ll see you soon, Ais. Hav
e a good time. Put everything else behind you. You deserve it.”

  IT TOOK ME ONLY TEN minutes to find Grimport’s house. Nobody had cars on the island, so there was no vehicle in the driveway that could confirm he was home. I knocked loudly on the front door, but no one answered. I repeated the process twice more, but everything inside the house was eerily still.

  “I don’t think he’s here.”

  “Maybe we can go inside, find his scepter and let the soul out on our own,” Aisling suggested.

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  She already had a tool in her hand and was working on the door. “We’ll be in and out before you know it.”

  “But ... that’s breaking and entering.”

  “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

  “I can’t break the law.” I squared my shoulders. “I’m serious. I’m dating the sheriff. That will not go over well.”

  “It will be fine. No one will even know we were here.” Aisling made a triumphant sound in the back of her throat as she threw open the door with a dramatic flair. “Ha! I told you I could do it.”

  I didn’t remember arguing that point with her. “Just because you can do it doesn’t mean you should.”

  “Well, it’s done now. I ... .” Aisling tilted her head to the side as a whiff of something awful flowed out of the house and hit our noses on the other side of the threshold. “Uh-oh.”

  “Uh-oh is right.” I waved my hand in front of my nose. “He needs to clean his house. That is awful. I can’t believe the neighbors haven’t complained.”

  Aisling poked her head through the doorway and frowned. “We need to call your boyfriend.”

  “No way. We can’t tell him we broke in.”

  “I don’t see where we have a choice.” Aisling extended a finger toward a huge lump lying on the floor between the living room and kitchen. “The reason your grim reaper was late yesterday is because he’s dead ... and I don’t think he died of natural causes.”

  My heart started pounding. “Are you sure?”

  “I’m no expert, but that knife in his chest makes me think it wasn’t a heart attack.”

  “Oh, geez!” I fumbled for my phone. “How are we going to explain this to Galen?”

  “Leave that to me.”

  8

  Eight

  I was right about Galen melting down. The look on his face when he parked in front of the house and strode in our direction promised mayhem.

  “He’s attractive!” Aisling, seemingly unbothered by what was stomping in our direction, sat in a lounge chair in the shade of the porch and rested her feet on the metal railing. “He’s big – like, huge. Do you ever worry he’ll crush you?”

  That was the exact worry flitting through my head. I opted for damage control right out of the gate. “I’m so sorry about this. I had no idea this is how things would go.”

  Galen pulled up short at the bottom of the steps. I was at the top, so I was taller than him. I didn’t feel it gave me much of an advantage.

  “You had no idea that breaking into someone’s house was a bad idea?” He was incredulous. “Really?”

  Shame burned my cheeks. “I swear it wasn’t my fault.”

  “If you want to blame someone, blame me,” Aisling suggested. “It was my idea to go inside.”

  “Really?” Galen flicked his eyes to her. “And why did you think it was a good idea to go inside?”

  “Because we’re trying to find Jacob Dorsey’s soul to ask him if he knows what happened to him, and I figured that Adam Grimport absorbed the soul, which means there was a chance he hasn’t transported it yet. Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure the reason we saw Jacob’s soul at all is because it was never absorbed in the first place. That means he’s still running around out there, which isn’t a good thing.”

  He narrowed his eyes to dangerous slits. “I don’t believe you answered the initial question. Why did you break into the house?”

  “I was going to search for his scepter to see if I could access the soul.”

  “That’s not really an answer.” Galen folded his muscular arms over his chest. “Why did you break in instead of calling for me?”

  “Because I felt like it.”

  I pressed my lips together and stared at my shoes. Aisling had a way about her, and clearly didn’t respect law enforcement. She didn’t seem to be worried in the least that Galen would slap a pair of handcuffs on her delicate wrists and haul her away. Me, on the other hand, I’d been taught to fear the police to a certain extent. I did not want to spend the night in jail. No way, no how, nothing doing.

  “You felt like it?” Galen’s tone was like ice. He steamed cold when he was furious, which always set my teeth on edge.

  “That’s what I said.”

  “I can’t even ... .” He broke away from the steps and dragged a hand through his hair, annoyance playing over his handsome features. “Is this how you do things in Detroit?” He asked, swiveling back. “If so, I can see why you’ve been arrested so many times.”

  “And you’ve only seen my official record,” Aisling taunted. “You should see the stuff my father managed to keep from going to court. That’s even more enlightening.”

  “Enough!” Galen held up his hand. “I don’t want to hear another word from you. You’re in big trouble. You could be charged for the stunt you pulled. Do you realize that?”

  “You’re not going to arrest me.”

  “And why not?”

  “Because you have bigger problems,” Aisling replied pragmatically. “You have two dead men, both with tiki masks placed over their faces and knives plunged into their chests. Because they died similarly, it’s apparent you’ve got a serial killer running loose. Or at the very least a spree killer.”

  Galen’s mouth dropped open. “Now you’re an expert on killer psychopathy?”

  “I watch a lot of very insightful television.”

  “I just ... how does anyone put up with you?”

  “I’m an acquired taste. Ask Griffin.” She lowered her feet to the cement. “Listen, we weren’t trying to foul up your investigation. We were trying to help. There’s no reason to get all worked up and growly. It was an honest mistake. We didn’t touch anything other than the front door, so no harm, no foul.”

  “I don’t even want to look at you.” Galen lifted his hand so he could hold it at an angle and obliterate her face from his sightline. “You no longer exist. I’ll let your husband handle you.”

  Aisling’s smirk disappeared. “Wait ... did you call Griffin?”

  “Of course I called him. Once Hadley told me what was going on I figured he had a right to know. He’s a cop. It’s common courtesy in our field to call when someone’s wife has been arrested for breaking and entering.”

  “Oh, you big tattletale.” She slapped her hands on her knees, fury positively rolling off her in waves. “Do you know what you’ve done? He’s going to be all ‘I told you so’ and ‘What have I told you about inserting yourself in police investigations?’ That’s on top of ‘You’re supposed to be on your honeymoon, not causing trouble.’”

  I had to bite my bottom lip to keep from laughing at Aisling’s imitation of her husband. The voice was wrong but the tone was spot-on.

  “I’ll never live this down,” Aisling groused, shaking her head. “This bites.”

  “Well, maybe you’ll think about that before breaking into someone’s home next time.” Galen swaggered up the stairs and stopped next to me. “You’re in trouble, too.”

  “I was trying to help.”

  “I know. You’re still in trouble.”

  “I guess that means I’m not getting the ice cream again today, huh?”

  His lips quirked, but he managed to maintain a straight face. “I guess you’ll have to wait and see.” He lightly brushed his hand over my shoulder as he walked past me and glanced inside the house. The odor was growing now that the seal had been broken. Soon it would be impossible to remain on the por
ch.

  “See, he’s dead.” Aisling moved to the spot behind Galen’s right shoulder and stared into the house. “I think he’s been dead several days.”

  “Oh?” Galen hiked an eyebrow. “Are you an expert on decomposition, too?”

  “You’d be surprised at the things I know.”

  “Well, you can know them over there.” He reached into his pocket and retrieved his cell phone. “I need to call for the medical examiner. I also have to think of a reason why you two were here. Thanks for that, by the way.”

  “You’re welcome.” Aisling was blasé. “Would you like me to give you a feasible reason why we were here?”

  “No.” He paused. “Maybe.”

  “Just put on your report that I wanted to talk to the island reaper because I was curious. Say we saw something odd through the front window and tried to go inside to offer help. It’s not that difficult.”

  “You’re an expert on alibis, too, I see.”

  She nodded without hesitation. “That’s one I’ll claim. I’ve been arrested a few times. I know how to handle alibis.”

  “Just go over there.” He wiggled his fingers. “I can’t wait until Griffin gets here to handle you.”

  “You’re still a tattletale.”

  “I can live with that.”

  GRIFFIN DIDN’T LOOK ANY happier at the turn of events than Galen did when he arrived. His eyes were keen as he searched the crowd — the medical examiner’s team consisted of six people and the looky-loos from the neighborhood had already turned out, so the number of bodies on the lawn had grown considerably. The moment he caught sight of Aisling sitting under a tree in the middle of the yard his expression shifted from worried to relieved, and then to furious.

  “He’s here,” I told Aisling, inclining my chin toward the driveway. “He looks extremely pissed off.”

  “He’ll be fine.” Aisling didn’t move her back from the tree. The heat was oppressive — even by Moonstone Bay’s standards it was a scorcher — and the only spot that offered even a modicum of comfort was in the limited shade under the leafy branches.