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Counting Backwards

Page 30

by Helen Dunmore


  There he stands, blind on slivovitz 194

  There is a gargoyle look when the mouth caves 55

  There we sat in the clattering dark 32

  There’s a stone set in the car-park wall 172

  These blackberries belong to the devil 152

  These second marriages arching within 416

  Thetis 376

  They are building houses 140

  They are hiding away in the desert 245

  They are the sun’s fingerprints on grey pebbles 131

  They fly / straight-necked and barely white 276

  They make him a plaster saint of poetry 83

  They rode the ridge those five minutes 156

  This evening clouds darken the street quickly 407

  This is Jacob’s drum 168

  This is the wardrobe mistress, touching 266

  This is what I want 262

  This path is silky with dust 248

  Those shady girls 287

  Those words like oil, loose in the world 188

  Three Ways of Recovering a Body 234

  Three workmen with blue pails 300

  Through Babel of Nations 59

  Tiger lookout 222

  Tiger Moth caterpillar 223

  Time by Accurist 264

  To Betty, swimming 313

  To cross the field on a sunset of spider-webs 126

  To my nine-year-old self 152

  To Virgil 233

  Today in a horse landscape 375

  Today is barred with darkness of winter 409

  Tonight I’m eating the past 371

  Tonight there’s a crowd in my head 214

  Tulip 141

  Two miles or so beyond 258

  Two of us on the tired pavement 193

  Two spines curve in 223

  Uncle Will’s telegram 378

  Under the leaves 206

  Undone 59

  Untroubled, the anaesthetist 19

  Up at the park once more 419

  US 1st Division Airborne Ranger at rest in Honduras 342

  Viking cat in the dark 218

  Violets 134

  Virgin with Two Cardigans 172

  Visible and Invisible 94

  Waist-deep in snow and wading 153

  Waiting. I’m here waiting 237

  Walking at all angles 167

  Wall is the book 150

  Washed silk jacket by Mesa 264

  We are men, not beasts 230

  We are the grown-ups, they the children 136

  We stop somewhere on the plain 38

  We’re strung out on the plain’s upthrust 312

  Weaning 403

  Weary and longing to go home 117

  What I get I bring home to you 325

  What shall I do for my sister in the day she shall be spoken for? 54

  What Will You Say 114

  What you have done to me has undone me 59

  When I held you up to my cheek you were cold 283

  When I should be working 82

  When I was four at the feet 90

  When my grandmother died my father eulogised her 166

  When you grow tired of the flame 220

  When You’ve Got 268

  Where have you been, my little daughter 279

  Where have you gone 395

  Where the great ship sank I am 256

  Whichever way I turned on the radio 317

  Whooper swans 276

  Why did you tell them to be quiet 75

  Why is the mimosa here 45

  Wild strawberries 325

  Window Cleaners at Ladysmith Road 118

  Winter 1955 312

  Winter Balcony with Dunnocks 44

  Winter bonfire 158

  Winter fairs 420

  With his hands he teaches wind to move 221

  With short, harsh breaths 196

  Without remission 189

  Writ in Water 83

  Years back and full of echoes 52

  Yellow butterflies 131

  Yes, but were we happy then? 41

  Yes, we believed that the oceans were endless 145

  Yesterday my stepson came home with school photographs 398

  You always thought that you’d die mid-stride 66

  You came back to life in its sweetness 242

  You could use his wing as a fan 143

  You must forgive me. Don’t look so surprised 152

  You never wanted the taste 113

  You put your hand over mine and whispered 291

  You’re breast-up in the bubbling spaces you make for yourself 313

  Your dry voice from the centre of the bed 303

  Zelda 391

  About the Author

  Helen Dunmore (1952-2017) was a poet, novelist, short story and children’s writer. Her poetry books received a Poetry Book Society Choice and Recommendations, the Alice Hunt Bartlett Award, and the Signal Poetry Award. Bestiary was shortlisted for the T.S. Eliot Prize in 1997. She won first prize in the Cardiff International Poetry Competition in 1990 with her poem ‘Sisters leaving the dance’, and first prize in the National Poetry Competition in 2010 with ‘The Malarkey’.

  After making her debut with The Apple Fall in 1983, Helen Dunmore published all her poetry with Bloodaxe Books, completing her tenth and final collection, Inside the Wave, shortly before her death in 2017. Inside the Wave won the 2017 Costa Poetry Award, and went on to be named as Costa Book of the Year, only the second posthumous award in the history of the Costa/Whitbread Book of the Year. Counting Backwards: Poems 1975-2017, a retrospective edition drawing on all her collections, was published by Bloodaxe in 2019.

  She published twelve novels and three books of short stories with Penguin, including A Spell of Winter (1995), winner of the Orange Prize for Fiction, Talking to the Dead (1996), The Siege (2001), Mourning Ruby (2003), House of Orphans (2006) and The Betrayal (2010), as well as The Greatcoat (2012) with Hammer, and The Lie (2014) Exposure (2016) and Birdcage Walk (2017) with Hutchinson. A final short story collection, Girl, Balancing, was published by Hutchinson in 2018.

  Born in Beverley, Yorkshire, she studied English at York University, and after graduating in 1973 spent two years teaching in Finland before settling in Bristol.

  Copyright

  Copyright © Literary Estate of Helen Dunmore 2019

  First published 2019 by

  Bloodaxe Books Ltd,

  Eastburn,

  South Park,

  Hexham,

  Northumberland NE46 1BS.

  This ebook first published in 2019

  www.bloodaxebooks.com

  For further information about Bloodaxe titles

  please visit our website and join our mailing list

  or write to the above address for a catalogue.

  The right of Helen Dunmore to be identified as author of this work has been asserted in accordance with Section 77 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

  This ebook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights, and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.

  ISBN: 978 1 78037 446 8 ebook.

 

 

 


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