by Claire Angel
It’s those women that give love a bad rap. They want the same thing, but they don’t want to be alone. I’m happy to live a life of celibacy. I’m no stranger to the stories of lust from my friends. They don’t know it, but I live vicariously through their explicit words.
“I’m sure you believe what you are saying. It saddens me to see how far society has fallen. There’s no such thing as romance. It’s all a game to see how fast you can seal the deal. Don’t sit there in judgement, because you know it’s true. The days of meeting and waiting until marriage is over,” I exclaim with a bit more conviction than is intended.
“I actually have friends who swear they never should have gotten married. It makes a guy take a cold hard look in the mirror,” He said with the glass of champagne in his hand.
‘That’s precisely the problem. Men have been conditioned to look for someone that reminds them of their mother.”
“Yes, but women are the same way. They want to find someone like their father. You might not believe it, but it’s true. I’ve seen the proof for myself,” He counters and I can’t argue against his reasoning.
“It looks like we are at an impasse. Both of us think we are right and nothing is going to change our minds. This is a touchy topic and maybe something to avoid in the future,” I advise with my finger touching the invisible ring I always wanted.
He held my chin and made me look at him. I don’t know what he is going to do. I’m prepared to reject him again. I can’t look at him without thinking about the kiss.
The fire that came over me altered my perception of the first kiss. It was all-encompassing and had me in its grip.
I lean forward and kiss him out of the blue. It is highly erotic and has me foraging my tongue into his mouth. I can tell he’s not ready for it. It surprises him, but no more than it surprises me. I can’t take it back and I don’t want to.
The heat of our exchange and the anger of our words bubbled to the boiling point. I was either going to slap him or kiss him. It turns out the latter is more pleasurable and much more satisfying.
I pull away from him stunned at how easily I have succumbed to his advances. The kiss is even hotter the second time around. I really didn’t think it could get any better.
I gasp when his finger slips under the dress and my panties in that order. His eyes go wide when he penetrates and finds resistance.
“Holy fuck….you’re a virgin,” He moans and holds my gaze with his eyes bugging out of his skull with his mouth parted in what I can only describe as being a deer in the headlights.
The cat is out of the bag. I didn’t expect him to go that far, but I’m to blame for letting him get finger deep inside me. I have no idea where to go from here.
Chapter 6
Tyson
It’s a surprise and I didn’t mean to react with outright shock.
She has her back toward me and I’m not sure what to say. The drive became silent and there’s this awkward tension hard to ignore. The very fact she’s a virgin causes me to rethink my strategy. I can’t begin to understand the embarrassment she’s going through.
It’s not every day a woman of her age would be found untouched by a man’s hand.
“I didn’t know, but you have to admit this would be a stunning revelation for anybody. You have to meet me halfway and there’s no reason for this to change anything between us,” I stammer, trying to find the right words and failing on a monumental level.
The limousine has made me a prisoner unable to hide from her scrutinizing eyes. This whole thing is supposed to be her awakening, but I couldn’t even imagine in a million years how true that statement is.
“You can really sit there and be able to say that with a straight face. Kissing you was a mistake, but you went further than I wanted to go. Do you always think kissing has to lead to sex?” She said, huffing with defiance with her arms crossed over her chest.
I drink the champagne to dull my senses and to make me feel numb from her accusatory tone. I want to turn around and go back home, but it will send the wrong message. She needs to know the secret isn’t going to make her seem any different in my eyes. In fact, the mere mention of being with a virgin excites me.
It’s not on my bucket list, but it is now. How can I turn down the chance to make myself the measuring stick she would use against all others? I don’t mind showing her the way, guiding her with a helping hand and encouraging words. I just have to get through the wall. It’s not going to be easy.
“I apologize if I read things wrong between us. My only excuse is that you seemed into it at the time. I might’ve been a little presumptuous, but you should take it as a compliment. I became overwhelmed in your presence and I felt this erotic high from touching you. Do you think that we can start over and forget about this?” I ask, hoping she will understand the best way to move forward is by wiping the slate clean.
“It’s my secret and you took it from me without a second hesitation. I can promise to try to forgive, but I will never forget. This has soured my disposition, but I’m not going to let it ruin my night. Just don’t do anything like that again and everything will be fine in time,” She said, tugging at the dress feeling self-conscious and doing whatever she could to minimize what had transpired.
This is foreign territory and I have no idea how to proceed. I made myself a promise to fight her misconceptions about me. I can’t be the same guy looking to get my hands in her panties. It’s true, but her perception is going to determine whether or not things are going to become physical in the very near future.
I occupy my time by mulling over the details. The scene in front of me of the nightlife flying by reminds me of my carefree days.
This is different and her reservations are going to need to be quelled. The only way to do that is to steer clear of anything remotely sexual. Topics are limited, but I’m worldly and I know how to play the game of idle chitchat. It’s in my DNA to smooth the troubled waters.
It’s the first time in my life where I don’t feel the confidence to take it to the next level. My predictable routine isn’t going to work on her a second time. She’s defensive and believes she has every right to protect her innocence from the likes of me. Changing her view is going to take an amazing amount of patience on my part.
“I have a confession to make,” I blurt out thinking it’s time to be completely honest to the best of my ability.
“You have my undivided attention,” She said coldly like she didn’t want to hear anything that would deflect from the anger preceding the incident.
“I don’t like the ballet, but I did this for you. It should say something about me when I go to these lengths to impress you. I’m never going to change, but I can be a little bit more aware of your feelings. This new information encourages a change of thinking. You have something to offer no woman can possibly give me. I’m not talking about your virginity,” I remark, holding out my hand and finding her trembling with untapped energy running through her veins.
She shrugs and pushes away from me. It’s excruciating to see the pain of indecision in her eyes.
I have to tread carefully and walk across the frozen ice of her heart with deliberate steps. Making no sudden movements is going to prevent mistakes. I didn’t want to tell her how delicious the idea of plucking her cherry satisfied something inside of me.
My talents in the bedroom speak for themselves, but I’m going to have to get her there. Women can attest to my prowess and technique. My stamina is above reproach and I shame most men by going the distance into the wee hours of the morning. It surprises me to learn from those women fortunate enough to be with me how I ruin them for others.
Men have a one track mind and I’m no different. Things are never going to change, but my approach was going to have to be subtle. Her weakness is having her heart on her sleeve and I can use that to my advantage. I can’t appear damaged and vulnerable. Her radar is up on high alert for anything untoward.
“I almost have to laugh at the absurdity of your statement. If my virginity isn’t what you are after then what could it possibly be? I know it’s not my winning personality and I’m sure you have been with a lot of women who mimic the meaning of being a blond Barbie,” She fumes and I can tell from how her nostrils are flaring this is going to be an uphill battle.
“I’m willing to wait and give you the time to find a reason to let down your guard. My reputation might not be a glowing recommendation, but I hope you won’t judge a book by its cover. Give me a chance and I promise you won’t be disappointed,” I said quietly afraid of spooking her like a trapped animal.
“It doesn’t matter what you say and I’m never going to believe you don’t have ulterior motives for being with me. I want you to be honest. Is being with a virgin everyman’s secret fantasy? Don’t bother answering and I already know the answer,” She accuses without actually saying the words and I feel like she has backed me into a corner.
I’m educated and refined with some dark sarcasm I’m trying to keep in check. She’s getting on my last nerve with her attitude rubbing me the wrong way. I want to tell how much she can learn by my hand, but I know she’s going to take it the wrong way. It’s better to fly silent and not say anything to make me look like the callous cad she believes me to be.
“I can honestly say the idea of being with a virgin has never crossed my mind. I thought they were elusive and I’m certainly not going to get involved with a woman barely experienced enough to understand the consequences of her actions. I don’t want to be cruel or unkind, but you are overreacting.” I said, imagining the possibilities of opening her eyes.
I didn’t want to appear desperate when she is already defensive.
I casually creep forward with my fingers getting closer until I let her feel my presence. She tries to shift away from me, but I pursue unafraid of being perceived as a fool.
She’s paralyzed by fear and doesn’t know how to trust herself. It’s a matter of finding a way to break her shell. It’s almost impervious and I’m going to have to work diligently to show her a man she can trust with her dignity and purity.
I’m standing next to her fire and I can feel the untouched flame burning me with more than a little aggression. She doesn’t want me to notice, but I recognize the signs of arousal. She’s biting her bottom lip and her chest is flushed. Her words might convey her disgust for my behaviour, but her body tells a different story.
“I’m sitting here and I can’t believe the words coming out of your mouth. It might be a good idea to keep quiet as you are not doing yourself any favours by talking. You might have most women wrapped around your little finger, but I think that you can testify the same thing can’t be said for me.” She utters with contempt.
I’m ready to take another swing, but she has already made herself abundantly clear. Refraining from talking about sex is paramount. She’s already on edge and I can’t do anything more to set her off. It’s counterproductive to be argumentative and it won’t get what we both ultimately want. Even if she doesn’t know it her body is practically screaming it.
The car comes to a stop at the curb and I can see the splashy scene playing out in front of me.
The privileged and elite have gathered for a night of culture. Most of the guys had designs on using these brownie points in the bedroom. The blank stares are indicative of their boredom and desperate need to find something to keep them from running in the opposite direction.
There are a few who genuinely enjoy this type of thing, but this is definitely not my scene. I’m never going to fit in, but I can pretend with the best of them.
“I’m going to make a concentrated effort to plaster a smile on my face. It would be good for you to do the same thing and we wouldn’t want the press to see any weakness in your armour. Put your hand around me, but nothing more than that,” She demands when she exits the vehicle and stands with a wave of appreciation to the crowd.
I’m hoping her discontent is something I can weather. She’s making it hard to want to go through with this, but I’m doing it under protest. It’s unspoken, but she already knows why I brought her. I would think this would help thaw the ice of her anger.
I join her with the throngs of people vying for the attention of the flashbulbs. I do put my hand around her and I feel an inkling of desire coming over me. My cock begins to rise despite the frigid air of her displeasure.
“I have no idea how you are feeling, but I’m going to make it my personal mission to give you a night to remember. You’re just like an angel, flying high above those you think are beneath you. I don’t belong here, but this is important to you. You can tell me to leave and I will grudgingly abide by your wishes,” I suggest innocently doing my best to channel the perfect gentleman.
She’s the perfect rose with all of her petals intact ready to be plucked. My perception that there are many firsts for her is vastly under exaggerated.
It’s not the perfect atmosphere for romance, but there is sexual tension.
I can’t help but wonder how the evening is going to end. Is it going to be with a whimper or a bang? I’m not naïve and I can see the writing on the wall. Tonight isn’t going to be the night.
“Just smile and look pretty. Isn’t that what you usually say to your dates?” She asks, using my words against me and I am reasonably impressed by her backbiting satire.
Chapter 7
Michelle
The evening is marred and I don’t feel the same joy I usually do when I attend something of culture. He sits there staring at me and I know he’s watching even though he thinks I don’t recognize the leering gaze. I can only imagine what is going through his dirty mind.
We left early and the ride back to my home is uneventful.
I grab for the door frantic to get out, but he holds me back with my anger evident by how I turn toward him with the stare of Medusa. He’s lucky he’s not frozen in stone, but this is the story of mythical legends.
“We need to work together and this better not affect our working relationship. I know you don’t want to hear this, but whatever happens outside the office stays there. If you can’t do that then tell me now and we will dissolve this relationship. I won’t be the topic of water cooler gossip in the morning. This thing is private and will remain that way. Do I make myself clear?” He barks like a rabid dog.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Nothing happened. Let me be as clear as you were. Nobody is going to hear from me because this never happened. We didn’t have an awkward moment in the limousine and you breathe one word of my secret and I will know you’re not a man to be trusted. Treat this as a test to see if you are worthy of being in the same room with me,” I chide with my teeth showing for emphasis.
He doesn’t even bother to walk me to the door and I find myself wondering how the evening would have ended had things gone differently. We would probably be at the ballet during intermission mingling with those with something to say about the first act. We would return and he would soldier through until the end.
I actually had designs on being a little bit more naughty than usual. I might have even let him get to second base. It’s a sports metaphor, but I really don’t know what it actually means.
I’m sure if he were driving the car it would have fishtailed down the street in his haste to get away from the silent torture.
It’s not going to be easy to see him and the facts were pretty damn clear. I’m a virgin and he knows it. What the hell am I going to do? I have this feeling he’s not going to let it go and this new information is only going to encourage him. I can only hope he won’t reveal my secret to anybody else.
I walk into the building anxious and looking for somebody to talk to. I’m not expecting visitors, but Jennifer is in the fetal position at my doorstep. She looks distraught and I don’t have the heart to tell her I’m in no mood to listen to her whine about her boyfriend yet again.
She looks up and for
ces herself to smile.
“It looks like I’m not the only one who has had one of those nights. We can talk about it over some rocky road ice cream you have in the freezer. It’s always there when we need it the most. We shouldn’t give guys this kind of power over us, but we are emotional creatures of habit,” She said, pulling herself together, but I could tell from her body language her smile didn’t match her mood.
“I don’t know why we put ourselves through this. I don’t need a man to be happy and complete. I’m doing just fine without one and there’s less drama.” I open the door and she follows me in until we are in the kitchen off to the side.
It is a galley type with not much room to move around, but perfectly fine for one person.
I still have the ice cream and found it where I left it. We are always running to each other looking for advice of the lovelorn variety.
“One of us is going to have to break the silence and I really don’t know if I can talk about it. Tell me what the jerk did this time to get underneath your skin. We both know you don’t come to me unless it’s about him,” I remark and dig my spoon into the carton.
I don’t want to mention his name. They have this love-hate relationship going back and forth for the past five years. Jennifer is always going back to something familiar afraid of trying something new. We actually found each other to be open books when it came to unburdening ourselves.
“He comes home reeking of alcohol and screaming obscenities to wake up the neighbours. Did he really think he was going to get me into bed under the influence? It was disgusting and I wanted nothing to do with him. I told him to go sleep it off, but he wasn’t taking no for an answer. I went to the bathroom to get away from him and snuck out the window. I know he’s only going to get angrier, but maybe when he wakes up he might recognize his bad behaviour. What do you think?” She asks with her spoon pointing in my direction putting me on the spot.
