He spun on her. She came to a halt, the world around her shaking.
“No matter what I feel for you, I will never be able to give you the life you deserve. Gavin knows who I am now. Do you want to be alone with me for the rest of your life, hunted by every clan leader who feels slightly threatened by my existence? Or do you want to know what it feels like to be safe with a family who loves you?”
Daphne raised her chin. “I don’t see how those two lives have to be separate!”
His lip curled. “Gavin is never going to accept me. Go back to them and live a happy life. You’ll find your forever mate in time, and you won’t have to think about me ever again.”
Daphne growled, feeling her beast swimming close to the surface. She grabbed Ford before he could leave and yanked him back. His gaze flicked between her grasp on him and her.
“No,” she said.
He cocked his head, clearly confused and on the edge of rage. “What?”
“You heard me. I’m not going to be told what to do anymore. Men who think they know best for me can shove it. Do you think you’re going to spend the rest of our lives telling me what to do?”
“Obviously not,” he spat.
“Good, because I don’t want anyone else. I don’t care if fate had another shifter picked out for me. You’re the only person I want, and I’m not going to let you walk away from this.” She loosened her grip on him in the hopes that he would choose to stick around.
Ford glanced at the dark woods around them, like a threat would jump out at any moment. Daphne wasn’t afraid of Zander or his threats. She was afraid of an empty life without Ford. Even though she’d only just met him, she knew there would be no one else for her.
Maybe fate had made a mistake. Maybe Ford had gotten lucky and fate had given him two mates. She didn’t care. Daphne wanted him and only him.
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re pushy?” Ford asked, eyeing her with a soft smirk.
She fought back her grin. “That’s what my brother always said. I like to call it determined.”
Ford’s gaze drifted past her, toward the cabin with all its lights on. Daphne’s gut churned. She didn’t know Gavin like Casey did. She’d made this grand stand to keep Ford, but that meant she might have no home at all.
Clearly, she wouldn’t be going back to Zander’s clan. The life she’d led there had ended. Cold poured through her. The revelation left her off kilter, and she could only hope that Ford would catch her.
But he only shook his head. With every passing second, he stepped further away from her. She wanted to reach out and take hold of him, but only stumbled.
“I wish I could be what you need,” he said, making it sound like goodbye.
One moment, Ford smiled at her and the next he’d turned his back on her.
“Don’t worry,” he called back. “I’ll keep my promise to Zander. He’s a dead man if he comes back.”
Daphne clenched her fists at her sides. Everything she wanted to say sat on the tip of her tongue, but she didn’t spew any of it. She didn’t scream or fight. If Ford wanted to walk away from all she wanted to give him, then that was his choice.
She couldn’t let this break her. She absolutely wouldn’t crumble and fall to the ground.
No. Screw this, she thought.
Daphne charged forward, into the darkness. She collided with Ford’s back and sent them both tumbling. He caught her and rolled so he couldn’t crush her.
“What are you doing? You’re a madwoman!”
She laughed. Exhilaration pumped through her veins, making her feel more alive than ever. So, that was what it felt like to give in to her urges? If that was the case, then she needed to try it more often. She no longer had any reason to hold herself back. The life she’d built around herself then had to tiptoe around was gone. She was as free as any bird in the sky.
“Stop. Running. Away,” she growled before claiming his lips.
With a moan, Ford rolled her over and pressed her into the earth. His groin ground against her hips as his tongue delved past her lips. She dragged her nails along the back of his neck before interlocking her fingers so he couldn’t escape.
“You’re mine,” she growled.
He tucked his face against her shoulder. His laugh sounded bittersweet. “I guess I am. Gavin is not going to like this.”
“Gavin can eat shit,” Daphne said too confidently.
Though she’d grown up with him and he was her brother’s best friend, a part of her knew she needed to tread carefully. Gavin wasn’t just another shifter. He’d become a clan leader and had the strength to back it up. If he decided that Ford was a threat, then they would have to run.
Daphne had done exactly as Ford warned and traded family for love. Her beast uncoiled and shook itself out, preparing for a fight. She wouldn’t let Gavin scare her. She would make a stand and vouch for her mate.
Her mate.
She didn’t know if it was still too early to say I love you. She didn’t even know if she truly meant it as she had so little experience with love. Her feelings were still wound like a set of earbuds in a pocket. She would have to take time to unravel them and truly understand the depth of her devotion. For now, though, she reveled in the joy Ford had brought her.
“Quit making out in the road!” Casey shouted.
“It’s time for a conversation,” Gavin said, much more quietly.
Ford tensed over her. She took his face in her hands and gave him another soft kiss that silently promised that everything would be fine. All that determination and strength she’d mastered over the years would prove useful tonight.
“I feel like I’m about to stand trial,” Ford whispered after helping Daphne onto her feet.
“It won’t be that bad,” Daphne told him even though she couldn’t be certain.
60
The cabin felt much smaller with the entire clan present. Ford shifted his weight from one foot to the other and tried to keep from looking around nervously. The only dragons here he was familiar with were Erik, Bree, and Daphne. The others he knew, but not that well.
Ford never thought he would stand before a clan ever again. He figured he would be struck down before that ever happened.
Daphne stood beside him, her hand grasping his. Her touch anchored him and kept his beast at bay. If it weren’t for her, he would have lost the fight to his beast’s rage. The creature wasn’t all that happy to be on this informal trial, but it wasn’t trying to bust through walls to escape yet.
No one spoke. Not at first.
Silence crackled like static in the empty spaces between all the shifters holding their breath. Bree practically vibrated. Ford gave her a nod, hoping that was enough to tell her he didn’t need her to fight on his behalf. He wasn’t here to drag others down with him.
It was about time he paid the price for his actions. His life had never been the same, but that never seemed like a proper penance. Now, Gavin would pass judgement. Perhaps, for Daphne’s sake, Ford would be exiled instead of executed. He didn’t want to take her away from Casey and her new sister-in-law.
“King killer,” Gavin said, finally.
Ford’s attention snapped to the man speaking. Gavin stood tall, his expression unreadable. Ford saw the glint in his eyes, though. It was either the spark of madness or rage. Either way, Ford didn’t think this would end well for him.
“Tell us why you did it,” Gavin said. “We need to understand why you turned on your leader if we’re going to accept you.”
Accept him? That was not a statement Ford had prepared himself to hear.
He cleared his throat, trying to shake off his shock. “You aren’t going to exile me?”
“That’s up to you. Tell us that what you did was justified and perhaps we can make arrangements for you to join us.”
Erik snorted, a smirk on his face. He turned his gaze on Gavin. “Look at you. Taking on your leader duties like a fully functioning adult. I’m so proud.”
Gavin kicked Erik in the back of the head hard enough to make Erik cringe. When Erik looked to Bree, she shrugged as if he deserved it.
Shifting his glare from Erik to Ford, Gavin asked, “Do you really think we’re the type to judge for rebelling against clan leaders?”
Ford sucked in a breath, feeling his lungs expand for the first time. He blew it out and prepared himself for a short story.
“I had a mate once. She had a condition that would have killed her, but my clan leader…” Ford waited for the pain and anger to choke him, but it didn’t come. “He took it upon himself to try to change her. She didn’t ask for it. That wasn’t a future she ever wanted for herself. When my clan leader’s actions led to her death, I killed him.”
Daphne pulled her hand from his. For a moment, Ford thought he would lose her, too. Then she touched his lower back and pressed her cheek to his arm. Perhaps she had suspected this. He’d given her bits and pieces of his past. Daphne was clever enough to put it all together, and still she hadn’t left him.
“Your clan leader,” Gavin said. “Was he prone to behavior like that?”
Ford fell back through history, shuffling through dusty old files in his memory. Finally, he nodded. “The guy was a pretentious dick. Women in the pack weren’t allowed to mate until they’d reached a certain age or fulfilled a number of years of service to him. I always wondered if my wife had survived, if he would have forced her service, too.”
Daphne’s lips curled. Ford put an arm around her. While her anger was warranted, it could serve no purpose. The man had died years ago. His punishment had been meted out already.
Across the room, Gavin nodded. “He sounds like a dick. He and my father aren’t cut from the same cloth, but they definitely came from the same asshole store.”
A jolt passed through Ford when Gavin looked him head on.
“Would you help me kill another clan leader? My father’s time in this world needs to come to an end. He cannot go on treating people like they’re disposable possessions.”
“Will you take his clan when he’s gone?” Ford asked.
If Gavin wanted a small army to help him overthrow his father just so he could assume power, then Ford wanted no part in this war. He saw no reason to remove one horrid ruler only to replace the man with another who could grow worse in time. He wouldn’t pull Daphne into harm’s way when they could run as far and fast as possible.
“These fuckers are enough for me,” Gavin said.
Ford couldn’t contain his surprise. His brows vaulted upward. Gavin shared a small smile with him.
“I don’t even want them.” Gavin gestured toward the clan around him, though they all grinned at him with obvious admiration.
“You’re like that father who says he doesn’t want a cat and then goes on to become the cat’s best friend,” Erik teased.
“My father tossed you out for a reason,” Gavin snarled back.
“I love you, too, buddy.” Erik winked suggestively.
Ford couldn’t believe there wasn’t more uproar from Gavin’s clanmates. He thought they would have argued against Ford becoming part of their clan, even if his inclusion was temporary. Weren’t they afraid of him? He’d spent so much time assuming that no one would ever want him around again, that this meeting rather confused him.
He looked from face to face. Some, like Gavin and Casey, were unreadable. Others were warmer. Evangeline grinned up at him. The pregnant blonde brought him something to eat before taking her seat beside Dillon. Ford already knew that Bree and Erik would welcome him, but he’d assumed that was because neither had a braincell between them.
Instead, it seemed that Ford had been mistaken. They weren’t accepting because they were dimwitted, but because they were walking a similar path. Ford had opted himself into a war. But for what?
He glanced down at the woman with her head on his shoulder. He’d acted without thought earlier. When he saw Zander grab her, Ford had struck. What about this woman had propelled him into action when he’d kept himself separate from this clan up until now?
Everything about her made him want to protect her. It was not that she was weak and needed his protection. He saw everything wonderful about her and wanted to keep the world from breaking her the way it’d broken him.
Maybe he needed her strength, too. She’d been thrust from the only home she’d ever known but didn’t seem bothered by it. Surely, she would have to face the truth later. He would be there when it hit her, and she had to process it. He would help her with all the ways he’d learned to deal with his own exile.
What was this if not the bond of mates? That shouldn’t be possible, but he couldn’t deny what he felt any longer, either. Had he been blessed twice? Or, had his wife kept him company and shown him how to love deeply before she left this world?
Both Ford and his wife had known that their time together would be short. She had few options before the last one had been forced upon her. He should have prepared himself for that day, but instead lost himself to his fury and self-loathing.
Whatever he’d had with his wife, there was no way to tell anymore. What he had was the present and this bond Daphne had formed with him.
“If you need me, I’ll stay,” Ford told the room.
How long that stay would be, he didn’t know. Once this was over, once Daphne found a mate, Ford would need to find a way to move on again.
* * *
“I don’t get how you can forgive me,” Ford said. He crouched on a low stool, his gaze focused on the floor.
The clan had left them alone after the meeting. Since Ford didn’t want Daphne alone, they’d retreated to her room at the cabin instead of going back to his place. She hated how thin the walls were here and how it felt like she would never have the privacy she craved.
Daphne stilled. “What is there to forgive? We’re in the middle of a similar situation with an equally horrible clan leader breathing down our necks. If we can’t understand why you did what you did, then how can we reconcile what needs to happen now?”
He raised one brow. “How can you sound so confident?”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s the only option life has ever afforded me. Be confident or be controlled. I chose to stand my ground, so now I’m going to be this annoying until the day I die.”
He stood and reached for her, his eyes so soft and warm that she felt like she would melt. She stepped into his open arms and pressed her ear to his chest so she could listen to his heartbeat. Even if they were not meant for each other, she would always call him her mate. She doubted anyone else would ever be able to cut through the thick tension she’d wrapped herself in.
He pushed her hair back from her face. “You’re not annoying. You’re inspiring and comforting.”
“Don’t let my brother hear you say that. He’ll be quick to correct you.”
“It sounds like he’s the one who needs correcting,” Ford said before stealing a kiss from her.
Though it seemed like they’d become a couple, there hadn’t been any formal acknowledgement of it. Daphne wanted him to call her his mate or at least his girlfriend. He’d done neither, and they hadn’t discussed their next step yet, either.
“You’re waiting for the world to fall on you,” she said out loud once she realized it.
He deflated. “Yeah. I think I am. Nothing has ever been this good. Not for a very long time.”
She nodded and hugged him tighter, afraid he might slip away. If he didn’t retreat to punish himself further, then this war might steal him from her. Gavin had asked Ford to help him against Zander. Daphne had never known Zander to lose a fight to anyone. While she had confidence in Ford’s strength, fear took up residence in her mind and refused to budge.
Her confidence couldn’t last forever. It was under barrage from all sides. She couldn’t find everything she ever needed only to have it ripped away from her. Yet, she worried that’s exactly what would happen.
“Make love to me again,” she asked as she pulled
him down onto the bed with her.
Alone, the air between them heated. Though she knew there were other shifters under this roof, only a few rooms away, she didn’t care if they heard. She would savor every moment with Ford that she could.
He propped himself up over her and let his gaze rove over her face, her neck, her exposed chest. “I’m afraid I’m confused,” he whispered almost sheepishly.
She caught the way his attention lingered on the claiming mark on her shoulder. A pulsing sensation started beneath the bite mark and traveled to her core.
“Do you feel…as strongly as I do?” she asked.
He laid a gentle kiss on the claiming mark and pleasure exploded around it, making her gasp and arch into him. The feeling was unlike any other. She couldn’t describe it, but knew Ford was at the center of it all.
His hesitation hurt.
She should have prepared herself for this. The interaction between him and Zander had left her too hopeful. She’d assumed Ford’s intervention was because he loved her the way she loved him. Now, she wasn’t so sure.
“I’m afraid to let myself love you,” Ford said finally. “What happens when I convince myself you’re my mate, and then you find the person you were always meant to be with? What do I do when I have to face the fact that it isn’t me?”
She wished she had a good answer for him, like when he asked about this war and forgiveness. Instead, her mind blanked. No amount of preparedness would help her in this situation.
Ford let his forehead fall to her breastbone. His breath washed over her skin, warm and uneven. She buried her fingers in his hair. Desperation made her own lungs tight. She never wanted to let go of him. If they never asked questions, they could believe that they were meant for each other for the rest of their lives.
Until someone else showed up. Daphne didn’t want to think that she could betray Ford like that, but mates were inevitable. No one defied their mating bond. She couldn’t escape what fate had in store for her.
Rogue Dragons Series: Box Set Books 1-5 Page 50
