Original Sins
Page 18
Kimball couldn’t argue the cardinal’s point, since it was something he had questioned over time. Then: “Why me if you know my history?” The cardinal appeared at a loss for words at first, until he admitted, “A feeling, I guess. An intuition on my part.” On the tabletop, which was tacky from not being cleaned properly, the cardinal placed his hands together in an attitude of prayer and placed them on the table’s top with his elbows winged to the sides. “A crucifix,” he finally said. Kimball had no idea what he was talking about. “I have a crucifix hanging on the wall inside my office,” the cardinal said. “Whether or not it became a divine interruption of my moral reasoning, it appeared to have guided me in some inexorable way, something I can’t question, surrounding you.” “Now you’re getting divine revelations?” “Divine revelations, Kimball, does not come by the voice of God, but by the inspirations we receive without knowing why. When I was looking over your file, I became overwhelmed by an unexplainable interest that became obsessive.”
“And why would you be reading my biographical record?” “Vatican Intelligence reviews all possible threats to people and records them in our database.” “Is that how you see me? As a threat to people?” “You do have a very special set of skills, Kimball. Skills that could benefit the Vatican Knights.” “It still doesn’t answer the question about why me.” The cardinal nodded. “Your eyes,” he finally answered. “It was the eyes within your photo. They were deep and cold, something without emotion. But I knew that you were in there hiding behind that wall. I sensed . . . that a truly good man lay underneath. All you needed was an epiphany to start you on the correct path.” “A correct path to what?” “A correct path towards the Light.” “And you saw all this by looking at a crucifix hanging on your wall and from a photo of my eyes?” Kimball lifted another shot glass and directed it at the cardinal in salutation. “Salud.” And then he downed it. After that, he said, “That’s one hell of an insight you have there, Cardinal.” “We all have insight, Kimball. Even you. Did not yours come by way of enlightenment after you killed those two boys in Iraq?” Kimball appeared shocked by this. “How would you know about that?” he finally asked. “There are technologies, Kimball, that we can tap into enough to zoom in until we can see the top of your head.” “Satellites,” Kimball remarked. “Like I said, we’ve been watching you.” Kimball leaned back into his seat waiting for the cardinal to add something additional, which the cardinal did. “You used to kill people because you believed that you were doing the right thing by your superiors. Your moral compass was, shall we say, rigged by those who wanted you to believe that you were providing a service that was for the good of others. You killed using the numeric model of addition by subtraction.
And yes, you may have questioned your actions at one time, maybe more than once. But it wasn’t until you killed those two shepherd boys in Iraq that pushed you over the edge, wasn’t it? Instead of completing your mission, whatever that was, you buried the children and absconded from service. And here you are, in Venice, having been placed upon my lap. Tell me, Kimball. Why here? Why so close to Rome where I can sit in front of you? Why are you not sitting in a bar halfway around the world, places hard for me to reach?” More good questions. And questions Kimball couldn’t answer. “I killed two kids,” he finally answered. “Now you tell me, Cardinal, is killing two innocent children a prerequisite for joining the Vatican Knights?” “It was the act, Kimball, that righted your path. Their deaths did not go in vain. Believe me.” “There you go. You’re justifying the act of murder against two innocent children. You want me to believe that they were moral sacrifices? Is that it?” “Was it not the action that divorced you from your service of killing those who cannot protect themselves? Was it not the action where you now seek solace in the drink of whisky?” Cardinal Bonasero Vessucci eased back into his bench. “Kimball, divine intervention comes as enlightenment, not as the voice of God. I truly believe that I was enlightened inside my office that day. Maybe the crucifix was the lightning rod of my illumination regarding the man who now sits before me. Whatever the reason, Kimball, here we are, two people sitting across from one another. Two people who were enlightened by actions neither one of us can explain.” Kimball looked down at his dual rows of whisky glasses, with some empty and some filled. Unable to look Cardinal Vessucci in the eyes, he said softly, “Do you know that I recently ordered one of my men to toss a woman from a plane cruising at ten thousand feet just to make a point?” “No.” “I did. And at the time I felt nothing. It was a way to achieve the means.” Kimball was finally able to meet the eyes of Bonasero Vessucci. “Is that the type of man you want as part of your team? To be a Vatican Knight?” “Sometimes, Kimball, people look to the heavens and the stars for answers when all they have to do is look within themselves. You sit here debating on whether your actions were proper and just. You sit here wondering if you’ve been steered in the wrong direction. And I’m here to say that you have. What you’re doing, Kimball, is that you’re trying to reason with your conscience. And it appears to me that you’re conflicted and that a war is going on deep inside you. You are trapped in the Gray, an area that divides the Darkness from the Light. You are the fulcrum between sinner and saint.” Kimball couldn’t help the sigh that was meant to be a calming release, but it was so weighted that it took little off any sense of relief. “I’m confused,” he finally said. “I know you are, Kimball. Questioning your actions and to see them as sins is a very good beginning. I can show you the way. I can give you guidance towards something that would alleviate the chaos you now feel.” Kimball feigned a half smile. “By doing what?” he asked. “By waving a magical wand?” “Not quite,” was the answer. “By showing you the Light. If a man is truly repentant of his sins, which I believe you are, then the Light will always be within reach. I can only guide you, Kimball, but the rest is up to you. The journey will be hard and difficult, believe me. And it will not be an overnight fix. But it’s something I believe in. And I believe in you, Kimball. Running from your past is a sign. And you winding up close to Rome is another. Everything, at least in my heart, points to me that this meeting is right for the both of us.” The half-smile from Kimball remained. “All from a crucifix hanging on your wall,” he stated in light. “All from a crucifix hanging on my wall,” Vessucci answered. “How about it, Kimball? Is it time to change the Darkness for the Light?” “I don’t know if I can follow that path,” he told him. “I’m wired differently than most. I’m a horrible Catholic. I don’t even know the words to “The Lord’s Prayer,” which I’m told is the easiest of all prayers to memorize.” “When you seek the Light, Kimball, all you need to know is one thing: Loyalty above all else except Honor. Follow that creed and you’ll be fine.” A moth suddenly appeared and alighted on the rim of a shot glass. Its wings had the stamps of eyes on them, an evolutionary measure for protection to make it appear larger or more menacing, Kimball thought. Even as the wings fluttered lightly, he could see the eyes weighing on him with watchful purpose. Then he recalled the moth that hovered close to his mother in his dreamscape, a creature that tried to absorb the Light that encompassed her. And then his half smile became genuine as he placed his hand so close to the glass that the moth could crawl into his palm. The eyes of its wings were watching, appraising. Mom, he thought. And as soon as he thought that, the moth took flight with its wings beating in a fluid and gentle manner. Turning to the cardinal, Kimball extended his hand and said, “I would very much like to join your team of Vatican Knights.” Cardinal Vessucci, accepting Kimball’s hand, said, “Welcome aboard, Kimball. The journey will be difficult. But when you feel at your lowest, I want you to understand that those will be the moments where we as a team will lift you.”
And like that, with a simple shake of a hand, a new alliance was born. Now with the support of the Vatican Knights and its clergymen, Kimball Hayden would learn to grow since it took an entire village to raise a child.
THE END
Table of Contents
C
HAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
Table of Contents
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE