Reflex

by Madelynne Ellis

  “I love the sounds you make when you’re struggling,” she said. “They make me want to do dirty things to you. I know you’d punish me for it afterwards, but I figure, we’d both get a lot of satisfaction out of that.”

  “Maybe,” he admitted. “We’re not going there, though.”

  “Spoilsport.” She said it playfully, but he knew there was genuine disappointment mingled in there too.

  It hurt him to admit he was letting her down, and hell, torturing himself in the process. Of course he wanted her. His cock was twitching with the need to feel her heat.

  “You have to give me time, Alle. If it’s going to work between us. I need to set the pace.”

  “Mm,” she sighed into his mouth. “I’m good with that. Nothing’s going in. I get it. I’m not getting off you until I’ve got you off though.”

  “Alle.”

  “Yes.” She melded her mouth to his.

  “Nngh,” he replied unintelligibly. She was riding him, and he was almost inside of her except for that frustratingly necessary barrier.

  “I know, right. So, relax. Enjoy it. Let me take care of you.”

  “Bad idea.”

  “Best idea I’ve ever had.” The tip of his cock was teasing her entrance. The welcoming heat of her body lay only millimetres away. “It’s okay, Spook. We’re not going to do it. No tricks. I’m not trying any sort of stealth mode. We’re not fucking. You can relax and enjoy this. Promise. Just breathe and let it happen.”

  “You’re a fucking menace.”

  He sucked in a deep breath, his hips rolling perfectly in time with hers now. It was pure joy holding her this close. The little bit of oxygen getting to his head still wasn’t entirely enough. He felt light-headed and curiously supersonic. His skin was alive from the friction. His cock thrumming with sensations inside and out.

  “Mmmm. You’re so fucking hot when you squirm. I want to see you come.” Her demand was both a menace and promise. She drew them apart enough so she could look at his face as she rocked faster against him. “Let me see you, Spook. You’re so beautiful. Let me know you.”

  That wasn’t such a good plan. What would she see? The monster lurking inside his pretty exterior. But he didn’t really think Allegra Hutton ever let anything stop her. It wasn’t that she overrode his wishes, precisely, she just bent his armaments into ineffective shapes.

  “Open your eyes. Look at me.”

  She was impossible to resist.

  One glimpse of those jade eyes smiling at him, and he was lost. Gone. “Shit! I’m coming.” She didn’t even have time to tell him that was the idea before pleasure unspooled in his groin. He groaned. Thrust wildly. Thrust so awkwardly, it slid them apart, leaving him moaning brokenly, his cock awkwardly trapped against the elastic waistband of his joggers.

  He hissed as she inched backwards on his lap, peeling them apart.

  “You can’t tell me that reality isn’t better than what was in your head.”

  Sex-addled, and now come-streaked, he shook his head. An orgasm at her hands hadn’t been a requisite for that admission. His head was every nightmare scenario rolled into one, except for when he lost himself in a train of music. Then his inner world burst into life. It’s why he always came off stage buzzing.

  “About that safe word,” he said, making her laugh, though after a moment she cocked her head to one side and regarded him more seriously.

  “Do you actually want one?”

  He thought a moment, then decided against. “I’d use it constantly. Every time you made me even a little bit twitchy. It wouldn’t be a final call, it’d be a crutch.”

  “Fair enough.” Her gaze dropped down to the space that now separated their bodies. “I think you might be a wee bit sticky.” With a single digit, she hooked his waistband and tugged it away from his skin enough to confirm the silvery evidence of his ejaculation clinging to his skin.

  Spook swatted at her, but he was still too addled to put any genuine effort into it. In any case, what was she going to do to him? She’d wiped him out, and he didn’t have the bounce back of a nineteen year old any more. He wasn’t certain he’d ever had it.

  Alle bent. She nipped his tummy, provoking a niggly grumble from him. Then, she poked her tongue out and licked at the mess.

  Holy friggin’ fuck! It was like a lightning strike to the base of his cock, which roused from droopy slumber and started perking up again.

  Immediately, Alle’s attention fastened upon him, a question latent in her gaze. “Want to shower with me?”

  He shook his head. “Lick it off.” His voice was nothing more than a crackly huff, but her expression lit up like he’d handed her diamonds.

  Without preamble, she dipped her head and set to the task. By the time she sat back on her haunches, he’d been licked spotless. Not a single smear of semen anywhere. “Thank you,” he said, drawing her into a kiss. The taste of him remained all over her tongue. Musky and undeniably male. He carried her back to the bed. Lay her down and covered her body with his for a moment. “I need to clean up. Order breakfast, if you like.”

  “I’m good,” she said. “Don’t be long.”

  -20-

  Spook took forever in the bathroom, which Alle wouldn’t have minded if she wasn’t so concerned he was using the time to weld on a new layer of armoured plating right when she’d managed to pry a couple of bits of the damn stuff loose.

  That, and he’d left her unbelievably horny.

  Horny enough that her fingers kept creeping between her thighs to knead her clit of their own volition. In the end, she figured the best course was just to deal with it. Life wasn’t perfect, and demanding reciprocal action would probably set him off twitching again. He must have been disorientated from that dream he’d been having to have allowed her the liberties she’d taken.

  As was almost inevitable, when she opened her eyes after her little fantasy of him nailing her hard, he was standing in the doorway to the bathroom watching her, phone in hand and pointed at her.

  “Sorry,” he said, swiping a small towel over the moisture clinging to his shoulders, before turning it on his hair.

  Sorry that he’d left her unfulfilled, or that he’d watched her get herself off and probably recorded it?

  “Drop the towel, and we’ll call it even.”

  His brow creased as he squinted at the towel in his hand, then relaxed as realisation dawned. “Perv,” he muttered, nevertheless unhooking the terry from around his waist.

  Damn, he was a sight to behold.

  “Well,” she confessed. “If I’m not allowed to touch… Only allowed limited touching, then I need to gorge myself on you some other way.”

  “Feast away.” He dug the coffeemaker out of a cupboard and set it off gurgling. He let her drink her fill of him for several minutes before grumbling about the chill. Whereupon he began raking about in his suitcase again.

  “I suppose you’d like me to put on some clothes too?” Alle said.

  “I’m not demanding it. But I need food. I think I’ve burned a heck of a lot of calories since last night.”

  “It’s all the thrashing about you do in your sleep.”

  That made him pause, but only for a moment. “Heard from Ronnie?”

  Alle let him get away with the unsubtle change of subject. “I haven’t. I don’t have my phone.” What the hell had she been thinking when she left it back at the other hotel? Clearly, she hadn’t been thinking, or rather she’d had a one track mind about a certain someone that had obliterated any logical thought processes. “Was it safe to leave him with Rock Giant last night?”

  “Doubt it.” A grin flashed across his face. “He’ll be fine.” Spook pulled on a pair of boxer briefs, then wriggled his way into a pair of skinny jeans. “Seriously, Paul’s a ginormous teddy bear. Well, unless you happen to be a wanker, or your name’s Xane.”

  “They don’t get on?” She hadn’t realised there was that sort of friction still in the band.

  “They’re do
tty about one another. At least they are now Elspeth’s not around stirring shit with every breath. Look, I’m sure your boy Ronnie, has had a fascinating evening. I’d lay money on neither of them having got laid though.” Having pulled multiple T-shirts out, he wrinkled his nose at all of them.

  “That one,” she suggested, pointing to a black one with a graffiti effect splayed over the sleeves.

  Spook ignored her and pulled on a white cotton button-down, the sleeves of which he rolled up to the elbows. His wrists, he covered in multiple pieces of leather jewellery.

  “Okay.” She’d bite. “How so?”

  “Rock Giant talks a bunch of shit, but truth is, he’s got a certain type, and his inclination is less and less to settle for what’s on offer if it doesn’t live up to that ideal. Ergo, they probably spent most of the evening talking about pulling, and next to zero time pursuing anything with an actual pulse.”

  “You don’t think Ronnie’s capable of pulling on his own?”

  “I’m sure he’s eminently capable of it. He’s cute. Hell, a year ago, Xane would have nailed him so hard he’d have been sore for a week. That swagger of his, it’s… It’s fucking hilarious.”

  Alle scowled. “So, Ronnie’s Xane’s type?” He’d be pleased to know that after his remarks before the show.

  Spook rested his butt against the desk top, and put his feet up on the side of the sofa while he pulled on some socks and laced his high-tops. “Everyone’s Xane’s type. He’s not choosy. If it breathes, he’ll bang it.”

  “So he’s pan, rather than bi?”

  “I believe the term he prefers is sexually fluid.”

  “What the heck does that mean?”

  “Anyway the wind blows,” he said, smirking.

  “Okay,” she mouthed. Honestly, she wasn’t sure she wanted to know anything too in depth about Xane’s proclivities. Mind, it was fun just to chatter to Spook while he pottered around doing everyday activities. She was still surprised that he’d been so relaxed about parading around naked for her. Of course, he was fully clothed now. Which was in no way a let down. That man made for one serious clothes peg. He could probably have had a career on the catwalk if he hadn’t opted for music.

  Alle watched him pull a brush through the damp knots of his hair, then scrunch the strands into a bunch at the back of his head. The effect made his jawline and cheekbones more pronounced. His stomach growled loudly while he stood before the mirror teasing a few strands loose to frame his face.

  “Want to borrow some clothes?”

  “I’m not skinny enough to borrow your jeans. My dress is fine.” Spook scooped it off the floor along with her bra and tossed them onto the bed. “No panties,” she mused. That seemed to happen whenever they hooked up. It was a good thing they didn’t have nametags embroidered into them like when she was at school, or she’d have one heck of a sleazy rep.

  “I can offer you boy shorts, or is that too weird?” He put his tongue to his teeth, and seemed trapped in a thought loop for a moment, before startling back into motion. “I’m not offended if it is. I mean, I turned down the same offer from Xane.”

  “Xane offered to loan you his underwear?”

  “Yeah, yesterday after I got wankered, and the spent the night at his place.”

  One, it was news to her that Xane had a “place” in Monte Carlo, although also not stupefyingly surprising. Two, crashing over didn’t usually result in a loss of underwear, and three, “What the fuck! I know you’re friends, but that’s weird. It’d be like wearing your brother’s.”

  “I wouldn’t know.” He shrugged nonchalantly. “I don’t have a brother.”

  She knew that, and he was missing the point.

  “You’re pulling weird faces,” he observed. Something riling you?”

  “I’m thinking.”

  The mattress jumped as he pounced onto it on all fours and crawled towards her. Once close enough he smoothed a stray curl away from her face. “Maybe not so hard. It looks like you might strain something.”

  “So distract me.”

  He kissed her on the tip of her nose.

  After a moment, he sat back on his haunches. “What is it?” One side of his face creased as he dragged an eyebrow downwards.

  “Xane. The underwear thing. You said everyone’s fair game. Does that include you?” She’d read that exposé in Bang! Magazine. Then, dismissed it as bollocks, but now something was niggling at the back of her brain. Something she felt she needed an answer to, once she figured out what exactly the question was.

  Spook grinned at her, his lips peeled back over his white teeth. “It includes everyone, Alle. It’s an addiction. I’m pretty sure he’s fucked every member of the band at some point or other, and all but the most recent additions to the road crew.”

  “Including you?” she reiterated, her voice practically breaking under the strain.

  Spook stretched out his arms before him, hands clasped. “Ah! Oh. Well, it was a very long time ago.” His grin broadened, until he actually laughed. “Is that not what you expected to hear? I hope you’re not labouring under the delusion that I’m in any way pure.”

  She shook her head. Lord no, he had way too many mad skills for that.

  Spook prodded her bare thigh, prompting her to curl her toes against his stomach.

  “I kind of assumed you were straight, you know? It’s what you implied, when you were talking about being celibate last night.”

  He shrugged. “I am. Mostly.”

  “Except with him.”

  Another shrug. He began massaging the tops of her feet. “Xane’s unique.”

  He didn’t say.

  “Also, it’s not really about gender.”

  What wasn’t? His attraction to people?

  “It was like aeons ago. While we were at uni, back before we’d even settled on a line up for the band.”

  “But presumably, he must have been one of the last people you slept with?”

  His hand movements intriguingly stilled. Spook ran his tongue over his even white teeth. “The very last, actually.” He gave another of those nonchalant shrugs, but this time there was a lick of lilac fire across his irises. “It had to be somebody. There’s no significance to that fact. The experience didn’t leave scars. He didn’t scare me into abstinence. It’s just coincidence. It could have been anybody. Had to be somebody. It just so happens, it was him.”

  That was a heck of a speech to establish it had been of no particular significance.

  “Were you drunk?”

  Spook sighed, then ran his tongue over his even white teeth. “No. And nor was he.”

  “You just decided to make out?”

  He cackled, clearly amused by her interest. “It’d been brewing a while.”

  “And what happened?”

  Spook walked two fingers up her thigh. “And why would you want to know that?” He poked her tummy, then a point mid-chest, before stroking a single digit across her lips.

  “I want to know everything about you.”

  “Do you now? What’s to say you’ll like what you find?”

  “I like what I’ve seen so far,” she gasped, lips parted ready for a kiss. He was so very close now, leaning into her, gaze downcast towards her mouth. He obliged. Tongue licking briefly against hers. Until his stomach grumbled, and they broke apart sniggering.

  “You need to put some clothes on, woman. I’ll help.” He slid her bra straps up her arms, then fastened the back clasp, before pulling her dress over her head.

  “He blew you, didn’t he?” she said, looking up at him as he knelt over her. “That’s how you know he can deep throat.”

  Spook moved her hair out of the way, and drew up her zip. “That and I’ve seen him do it a number of times since.”

  “Did you reciprocate?”

  He lifted her hair, and smoothed it back over her shoulders. “Alle? Really? You’re going to grill me about what I did in bed with someone a decade ago?”

  It wasn’t any someo
ne. They were talking about one of his best friends.

  “Feel free to grill me about my past lovers. I’m warning you though, they were very boring, and supremely vanilla. None of them were even a little bit kinky.” She might have added, ‘unlike you’, but it was kind of already implied. “So, come on. Did you?”

  His lips squeezed together as if he were attempting to stifle a smile. It broke dramatically and he gave a wry laugh. “I did not.”

  “Oh!”

  His index finger rubbed against the ring on his thumb. “I fucked him, Alle. Paddled his arse until it was fucking scarlet and then I nailed it.” His fingers reached his lips. “There, now you know the history of Xane and Spook.”

  “Is that the truth?”

  “Do you doubt me? Confirm it with him if you like.”

  “You buggered him and then you gave up sex!”

  “There’s no correlation between A and B, but yes, essentially.”

  “Wow.” Alle nibbled her inner cheek. “I’m not exactly sure what to say to that.”

  “Think about it over breakfast.” His stomach gave another loud gurgle. “Not that a response is necessary. It’s ancient history.” He tugged her off the bed and guided her into her shoes.

  “But he has had what I haven’t. If that’s not a reason to be jealous, I don’t know what is.”

  “Don’t be. There’s no need. Xane was about satisfying a particular itch. What’s between us is entirely different.”

  “It is? The thing is, Spook, I don’t even know what it is we have. Are we official? Or are you going to jump on a plane in twenty-four hours or so and leave me hanging for another nine months?”

  Dammit, she hadn’t meant to bring that up, but there was no point denying she was wounded by it.

  Spook snatched up the room key, and prodded her towards the door. “I have two weeks off,” he said. “I ought to try and squeeze a trip in to visit my sisters, but I’m otherwise free to spend time with you.”

  He hadn’t exactly answered her question, but she was nevertheless left blinking in astonishment at him. “You actually want to—”

  “I do.” He rubbed the scruff around his jaw. “That okay with you?” He clasped her hand.