Fight for Me: The Complete Collection

by Jackson, A. L.

  Kinda made me sad that her adorable lisp had all but disappeared.

  Guess time didn’t stop spinning, no matter how badly I might want it to.

  Didn’t think it was possible, but Evan’s face lit up even more when he looked at Frankie, and he threw it with all his might, sending it soaring.

  You know, about ten feet in the air.

  Fucking cute.

  “You’ve got a visitor, man, three o’clock,” Rex warned, and I turned in time to find Ryland toddling my way.

  His arms were thrown up over his head, and he was giggling as he tottered over, anticipating that I was going to scoop him up.

  I did.

  It sent a tremor rolling through me.

  Truth was, kids terrified me.

  Terrified me in a way that wasn’t healthy.

  Didn’t mean these three hadn’t melted through the hard places at the center of me. Worked their way in, my care fierce.

  Would do absolutely everything in my power to keep them safe.

  Ryland yanked at my beard with his chubby fingers, his grin so wide as he flashed me a row of four teeth on the top and two on the bottom.

  He grunted hard like he was talking to me.

  “Ouch, dude,” I chuckled, trying to unwind his death grip. “That hurts.”

  Kid laughed like it was the funniest thing in the world.

  So did his dad.

  Like I said, his dad’s mini-me.

  I scowled in Rex’s direction. “And this is funny, why?”

  “Uh, how about because you’re holding my one-year-old like a backpack that might contain a bomb.”

  It was just then I was realizing I had him under the arms, holding him out and away from me. My beard was just out of reach of his flailing arms. “Self-preservation, man. Kid’s about to tear me limb from limb.”

  Such a pussy, Rex mouthed, smirk on his face as he came to collect his kid.

  Such an asshole, I mouthed back.

  Evan was all of a sudden in my line of sight, his hand going over his mouth like he was trying to shield himself from my corruption.

  Awesome.

  Turns out, Kale was totally right. I had no idea how to act around kids.

  “Such a bad influence. You’re hopeless,” Kale taunted from behind, picking up the football and hurling it my direction.

  Just like the old days.

  I ran back, caught it with an oomph, and sent it sailing right back.

  “Not sure what you expect. Don’t run into a lot of kids in my line of work. Sorry I’m not a kiddie doc who always knows the right thing to say.”

  Catching it, he lifted his arms out to the side. “Has nothing to do with my profession. It’s just the natural charm.”

  I shook my head with a laugh. “Charm? More like constant flow of BS. People just pretend like they tolerate you.”

  “Which is why you show up to the park to hang out with me.”

  Kale threw the football to Rex.

  “Pretty pathetic, if you ask me.” Rex. Giving me shit just like the fucker always did.

  Without a whole lot of effort, he reached out and caught the spiraling ball.

  The look I shot him would have seared a lesser man in two. “Says the guy who said he would come drag my ass here if I didn’t show. Now tell me who the pathetic one is? Just felt sorry for you suckers, that’s all.”

  Rex grinned as he stepped back to hurl the ball. “You’re just jealous our lives are filled with parks and diaper bags and spit-up rags. Super glamorous, right?”

  “Jealous?” I tossed out, spinning on my heel to run, because Rex had an arm, that was for damned sure. The ball flew high and far.

  Finally got out in front of it, and I caught it in both hands.

  “Totally jealous,” Kale piped in. “Dude doesn’t have it in him to admit we have it right, and he’s the one missing out.”

  “Right for you, man, right for you.”

  Truth was, I knew they had it right. Saw it on their faces. They were living for the good in life. But that was the kind of good there was no chance I could stomach.

  Because I couldn’t be trusted with the good things in life.

  It’s your fault.

  I trusted you.

  You were supposed to take care of her.

  You promised, you’d take care of her.

  An echo of those words assaulted me, and I could almost feel the fists beating against my chest as my mother screamed in agony, her anguish its own phantom that would haunt me the rest of my life.

  I threw the ball with everything I had, like it might take the sorrow with it. Peel it from my skin. Or maybe take me back to that time. Where I could change it. Make it right.

  Kale grunted when he caught the blistering spiral. His eyes narrowed in awareness. The guy knew me well enough to latch on to exactly where my mind had gone.

  “Seriously, Ollie. Joking aside. You belong here, man. With our kids. Our families. Don’t ever question that.”

  That was what they’d become. Didn’t mean I didn’t continually feel like an outsider. The leech who had nothing but was desperate for something, latching on, the whole time praying I didn’t bleed them dry.

  My voice went hoarse. “Love them like my family,” I forced out, my gaze moving to the kids, who were playing so free.

  “That’s because they are your family. Think we all know well enough blood isn’t necessary to make that bond.” Rex’s words were low.

  Emphatic.

  Like he needed me to know.

  Like he was reminding me of the way it’d been when we were kids. And truthfully, the way we were then. Could trust both of them with anything.

  Rex began moving my way, angling his head at Kale to follow.

  We met in the middle, moving away from the kids a bit. Clearly moving out of earshot.

  “So, what’s this bullshit about Nikki’s place getting broken into? Any idea who it might have been?”

  My head shook, unease tying up my guts. “No. She’s being tight-lipped about it.”

  “Stubborn,” Kale said, almost offering a smile.

  I huffed out a frustrated sound. “Tell me about it. Pretty sure it has something to do with that meeting she’s helping to run. She goes quiet the second I bring it up. Think she’s protecting someone.”

  A fresh round of fury pulsed through my veins.

  The acute need to protect Nikki.

  The urge to hunt.

  Problem was, I wasn’t sure what I’d do if I found the fucker who thought it’d be a good idea to mess with her.

  “I called Seth this morning, and he said they still don’t have any leads.”

  Couldn’t stand the thought that he was still out there.

  “I don’t like this whole situation. Something just doesn’t sit right.”

  That feeling continued to grow. Coming on stronger. An itchy awareness of an approaching storm. Something wicked wound with the wind.

  “She’s still staying at your place?” Kale asked.

  “Yeah.”

  As much as it was driving me straight out of my mind, I wasn’t letting her go anywhere.

  Rex dipped his head quickly, happy with that answer. “Rynna is seriously messed up over it. Keeps bringing it up every night, worried about Nikki and what she’s going to do. You know Nikki . . . she tried to play it off like it wasn’t a big deal, but Rynna didn’t buy it. She suggested we find a house to flip and have Nikki rent it so she’s in a safer neighborhood.”

  In contemplation, he looked away before bringing his attention back to me. “There was a building that went up for sale by the river. One of the deserted warehouses down on Row.”

  Kale whistled. “Took a drive down that dirt road a few weeks back after we had a picnic at the lake. It’s like a fucking ghost town out there.”

  Rex nodded. “Yup. Place is just about as dilapidated as they come . . . junkies using it as a drug house and God knows what else . . . but the location is mint. And you know Broderi
ck, he’s always thinking big. He wants in. Luxury condos right on the river. He’s envisioning developing the area into a destination spot with stores and restaurants and maybe another hotel in the future. Think I’m gonna keep a couple units for investment, make it affordable for Nikki. She can stay there as long as she wants until she decides on a permanent place.”

  With me.

  The thought struck me from out of nowhere.

  Fuck.

  No.

  Not from out of nowhere.

  I knew exactly which direction it hit me from. Where it lived. In that deep, deep space that would always fucking belong to that girl. The piece of me she would always hold in the palm of her hand.

  The only girl I’d ever loved. The one I wanted but couldn’t keep.

  Throat lined with razors, I swallowed hard. “Sounds like a solid plan.”

  “Thought so, too. Stand to make a lot of money, so it isn’t gonna hurt us a bit to keep one of the units for Nik, even though I know she’s gonna be all up in arms about it. We’re going to have to ease her into the idea.”

  “I agree.”

  He eyed me. “Not sure what she’s going to do in the meantime. It’s going to take us at least a year to get the first condos ready, but I don’t like the idea of her staying at that apartment.”

  I rubbed my hand over my mouth, my small laugh incredulous. “Think it’s safe to say that makes two of us.” I sucked in a breath. “She’s just going to have to stay with me until then.”

  Kale’s brows shot to the sky. “And you think Nikki is going to go for that?”

  “Hell, no,” I said. “I’ll just have to convince her.”

  Kale grinned. “Really?”

  “Yup.”

  Rex laughed low, rubbing a hand on his chin. “That sounds like . . .”

  Torture?

  Torment?

  I’d be ruined by then. Didn’t matter.

  “Fun,” Rex finished with a smirk.

  I wanted to smack the smirk off his face. “Fun?”

  “What?” He was all wide-eyed innocence. “Nikki is all kinds of fun.”

  Asshole.

  I punched at him.

  Laughing, he jumped back, blocking himself. “Hey, don’t get mad at me because she’s . . . fun.”

  Kale chuckled. “Oh yeah, I bet she’s all kinds of fun. Now you get to have fun with Nikki for a whole year.”

  “She’s a pain in my ass, is what she is.”

  “Right . . .” Rex drew out. “You just keep telling yourself that. But if you do, make sure you don’t break her heart while you do it.”

  Suddenly agitated, I scraped a hand through my beard. “Not gonna break her heart.”

  Not again.

  Rex sobered. “That girl’s been in love with you for as long as I can remember. Followed you around like a puppy all through school. You’ve got to be careful with that, man.”

  Wondered if he really had no clue that it’d been more than Nikki following me around. That it’d grown into something it shouldn’t have before it became responsible for the single greatest regret of my life.

  How even after I’d shut it down, cut her loose, it’d still festered and grown until it’d consumed me, and I’d found myself a pathetic beggar at her door.

  Unable to stop myself from going to her.

  Needing her.

  Knowing I was just going to hurt her all over in the end.

  “Just . . . get that building done. I’ll take care of Nikki until it’s finished. Barely see her, anyway, since we have opposite schedules.”

  “All right, then. It’s a plan.”

  I nodded.

  It was a plan.

  A plan that left me completely screwed and somehow satisfied.

  Needing a distraction, I pulled away from the guys and shifted to holler toward the kids, “Who wants to get ice cream with Uncle Ollie?”

  Frankie Leigh tapped Evan’s shoulder, the little girl signing to her best friend.

  In a second flat, both of them were beelining toward me. “Me! Me! Me!” Frankie shouted as she and Evan raced my direction. “I want to ride with you, too!”

  Rex laughed under his breath and scratched at the scruff on his chin. “Apparently, I’m going to need to have a talk with Frankie Leigh about ditching her little brother. Literally left my little man in the dust.”

  I chuckled under my breath. “Don’t give her too hard of a time. She knows you never take your eye off him.”

  Frankie grabbed me by a hand, and Evan slipped his hand into the other, both of them grinning up at me like I was maybe the coolest person in the world.

  I gulped down any unease and tightened my hold on their hands, leading them over to my truck parked on the curb.

  I unlocked the passenger door and both of them clambered onto the seat, Evan first considering the truck was so his thing. He was running his palms over the leather dash, the steering wheel, checking out every detail.

  I shut the door behind them and rounded the front, climbed inside, turning my face toward him so he could see. “Still your favorite, buddy?”

  He gave me a thumbs-up and a smile that was nothing but bright shiny teeth. I ruffled a hand through his hair. “You have good taste, that I can tell you.”

  He nodded like crazy as he buckled in before he was grabbing Frankie’s hand and weaving his fingers through hers.

  I chuckled under my breath.

  Oh, so that was how it was.

  Little player.

  He didn’t even blush when he realized I’d caught him, my eyebrows lifting in question. He just gave me a look that told me she was his to watch over.

  She missed the whole exchange, too busy vigorously rolling down the window.

  “Start her up, Uncle Ollie,” she shouted, and I did, the two of them laughing as I quickly flipped a U and headed in the direction of the ice cream parlor that wasn’t even up the road a block.

  Kale and Rex would walk, but I’d promised Evan a ride, and he was gonna get his ride.

  I glanced over at the two of them sitting on the bench seat, so fucking cute, so sweet, so perfect.

  Frankie Leigh’s hair blown by the whipping wind, her little hand out the window, gliding up and down like she was riding a wave.

  Evan’s attention was wrapped up in the truck, the dials and gauges and the gear stick I shifted that climbed from the floor and basically stuck up right between his knobby knees.

  Their hands?

  Still linked together.

  I needed to downshift to pull to the curb in front of the parlor, so I grabbed his free hand and wrapped it around the knob, guiding him through the motion.

  He made this thrilled, scuffing sound that twisted my spirit like it’d been wrung up by a tornado. Seemed it was the simplest of things that made this kid insanely happy, and damn it, if that didn’t make me happy, too.

  I let him help me take it out of gear and put on the brake as we parallel parked on the street, and I told them to wait as I jumped out and headed around to the passenger side that butted the sidewalk.

  By the time I was helping them out, Rex and Kale were already approaching, little Ryland taking a ride on his daddy’s shoulders.

  “You finally made it,” I tossed out wryly.

  “Whatever. I can walk faster than that old truck,” Rex badgered.

  Frankie hopped out and bounced over to him. “That was so much fun!”

  Rex shook his head. “Why doesn’t she go on about my truck?”

  Frankie Leigh’s mouth twisted with distaste. “Daddy, your truck is a work truck and stinky and dirty. Look how pretty Uncle Ollie’s is.”

  She waved her hand out like she was one of those The Price is Right models.

  Rex latched on to that real quick. “Ah . . . it is pretty, isn’t it? Just like Uncle Ollie. Pretty Boy,” he taunted.

  If his kid hadn’t been standing there nodding and agreeing like it was the truest thing he’d ever said, I would have given him a finger.
<
br />   Pretty Boy, my ass.

  “Come on, you two.” I stretched out my hands for Evan and Frankie. “I promised you ice cream, let’s get you some ice cream.”

  “Yay!” Frankie yelled, skipping along at my side.

  Evan and Frankie went right for the display, pushing up onto their toes so they could see the different flavors displayed behind the glass.

  They ordered sundaes, and Rex ordered a cone for Ryland. We found a place in the corner where the kids dug right in.

  Conversation easy, Rex, Ollie, and I chatted, catching up since we didn’t get to chill like this nearly enough anymore.

  I froze when I felt the hairs at the base of my neck lift. A prickle of awareness. Not in fear.

  Or hell.

  Maybe that was exactly what it was.

  Fear.

  Because the weight of her presence was beginning to become terrifying. Affecting me more and more.

  I slowly shifted in the hard booth so I could glance over my shoulder, wondering if my mind was just making shit up.

  But no.

  She was there.

  Nikki.

  Honeyed locks cascading down her back in a wild, erratic stream. Not curly in the least, but still all over the place.

  Her back was to me, but she was sitting at a table sharing ice cream with this young girl who couldn’t be more than seventeen or eighteen. At the girl’s side, covered in chocolate ice cream, was a little boy who probably wasn’t much older than Ryland.

  Shoveling the ice cream in like he’d just discovered the Holy Grail.

  By the look on his face, he had.

  That wasn’t what had my insides curling with a crazy sort of worry. Wasn’t what had disquiet sinking slow and sure in to that vat at the bowels of my spirit where all the bad shit lived.

  Compounding and sharpening.

  It was the way the girl’s expression held nothing but beaten-down fear.

  Debased and degraded and disparaged.

  Like she couldn’t take a single thing more or she would crack.

  Nikki held her hand in the middle of the table, her head dropped low and tipped to the side. Even though she was facing away from me, I could tell just by her posture that she was speaking to her.

  Her words low but fast.

  Desperate encouragement.

  Awareness seeped through me like a parched desert sucking up a summer rain.