Spell It Out for Me

by Sarina Dorie

  He shrugged, his smile wicked. “I think Jeb will be a little preoccupied at the moment.”

  “Why? What did you do?”

  “Nothing much. I just sent him a bottle of expensive whiskey by post. I bet he’ll be too inebriated to care where you are.”

  I laughed at that.

  He tugged me to my feet. “Are you ready for nature therapy?”

  “What does that mean?”

  “You’ll see.” He led me down the path.

  “And this date is completely, one hundred percent in this world, not some fairyland?” I didn’t want to walk three miles through the woods to a secluded place off school grounds like Julian had once led me to. Not that I thought Elric was like Julian.

  “We’re staying on school grounds and in the Unseen Realm. Your surprise is down by the stream.”

  As we made our way along the path, I hesitated when I heard the violin music. It was actually good, so I knew it wasn’t one of my students.

  “Someone’s already here,” I said.

  “Indeed. That’s part of the surprise.” He grinned, his face so full of sunshine and warmth, the summer day couldn’t compare to his radiance.

  The bank near the stream had been transformed into the kind of rustic backyard fairy garden one would expect to see on Pinterest. White sashes swayed from branches. Lanterns hung from limbs. Flowers blossomed from every plant and tree. A small orchestra played classical music. Oddly, the musical instruments floating in the air were playing by themselves without people. It was so enchanting it took my breath away.

  I walked forward in awe. I felt like I’d stepped into a surreal painting. Almost hidden in the foliage was a familiar canopy bed made of wood and decorated with curtains of sheer fabric and moss.

  “I thought we were going on a hike,” I said.

  “A picnic. Morties still do such things, correct? Or am I behind in the times again?”

  “There’s a bed, not a picnic blanket.”

  “I eat in bed.”

  I gave him a sidelong glance. “As long as you don’t plan on eating me.”

  He winked at me. “How is it you always see through my plans? First the puppy underwear and now this.”

  I laughed at that. “The puppy cape was a good idea. The puppy underwear, not so much.”

  “I think a mattress is a good idea.” He tugged me toward the bed. “It’s more comfortable than the ground.”

  “Uh-huh. You know this is school grounds and not all the students are gone yet. Anyone could come walking through here and catch us. I’m not going to do anything naughty.”

  “Of course not. But just to keep us free of distractions, I’ve put up an additional warding to keep children away. Not that we are going to do anything risqué, as you’ve said. Besides, my guards are standing post. I’m not about to do anything with them listening in.”

  He lifted a picnic basket from the ground and set it on the white blankets of the bed. Elric chattered away as he unpacked the food and laid it out. I noticed he wore white gloves as he did so. It had to be the plastic wrappers most of the food was packed in. The fruit was precut and labeled as organic with a barcode on the label, signaling it came from the Morty Realm. That meant it should have been safe.

  He offered me a grape. I hesitated. Thatch had told me not to eat food that any Fae offered me without checking it for magic or to see if it came from their realm first. I didn’t know that kind of magic.

  He dropped the grape back into the bowl. “Are we stuck on that again? You should know by now that I’m not like that.”

  “You’re right. I should know.” Even so, I couldn’t know for certain. Why did doubt have to burrow into my love for him? If only I could stop thinking about Felix Thatch and the paranoia he’d driven into me.

  Elric sighed in exasperation. “The fruit came from Whole Foods, not my father’s orchard. If I was going to force you to become my bride, don’t you think I would have done so that night in my father’s castle? Or the night we came here after our date in the Morty Realm?”

  That was logical. I truly wanted to believe him. How could I have a relationship with him when I didn’t trust him? If I loved him, this shouldn’t have been so hard.

  “What can I do to convince you?” he asked.

  “We teach students not to accept food from Fae. And the other adults around me always check the food themselves. I haven’t studied that kind of magic yet. I didn’t need to before. It would be easier to eat with you if I learned that spell.”

  “Maybe you should. That way you can check everything I give you to make sure I’m not a lying scoundrel.” He crossed his arms and stared off into the distance.

  This was not the date I had envisioned.

  We sat there in silence. The stream burbled. Trees whispered in the breeze. One of us needed to say something.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “This picnic was probably a lot of work. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. If you want me to go, I will.”

  “I don’t want you to go.” He took my hands in his. “I want you to love me as much as I love you.” He lifted my palm to his lips.

  “I do love you.”

  “Yes, of course.” Doubt crossed his eyes. “It’s hard that you don’t trust me. It must be hard for you too.” His lips brushing against my skin distracted me. “I haven’t helped with that now that I’ve put you in an awkward position to offer you food, but for you not to be able to check it yourself. I think I’ve forgotten what it was like in the beginning of a relationship, that it takes time for a Witchkin to learn to trust a Fae.”

  I squeezed his hand. His admission of his own faults and anxieties made him more human. He was less the intimidatingly perfect demigod.

  I picked the grape out of the plastic bowl, wanting to show him I could trust him. My insides quivered, and I wondered whether my intuition was telling me I was about to make a mistake or Thatch had simply poisoned me against him.

  I offered him a smile. The moment I lifted the grape toward my lips, Elric slapped it out of my hand and laughed.

  Baffled, I stared at him.

  He snatched up the stolen grape and popped it into his own mouth, his smile mischievous. “We’ll see if I share my forbidden fruits with you in the future.”

  I laughed at that. “I hardly think Whole Foods is forbidden.”

  “That was a euphemism in case you didn’t catch it.”

  “How considerate of you for pointing that out.”

  He offered me another. Just before it touched my lips, he dropped it down my shirt.

  “Another for me?” He leaned his face toward my cleavage.

  I twisted away before he could get it. He wrapped his arms around me and tickled my sides. Laughing, I dug it out and threw it at him. It hit him square in the nose before bouncing off the blankets and falling to the ground.

  He kissed my cheek. “You are the wickedest witch I’ve ever met.”

  “I guess you never met my mother.”

  That froze his smile. “Actually, I did meet her. She worked with my son. They were both teachers. She used his family ties to become acquainted with my father. He invited her to balls.”

  “What was she like?”

  “Very shrewd and intelligent. She would have to be for consorting with Fae.”

  I selected a plump grape, but Elric placed a hand on mine. “I want you to feel safe. You shouldn’t have to prove yourself to me by doing things you aren’t comfortable with. It isn’t fair to put you in that position.”

  I circled my arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. I appreciated how kind and considerate he was. He didn’t always understand what it was like to be human and have the worries that I did, but he tried to understand. Being around him filled me with such joy. He made it easy to love him.

  “How about I feed you grapes instead? That would be romantic, right?” I plucked a grape from the bunch and fed it to him.

  He made a
face. “That one was tart.”

  I fed him another.

  “By Nimue! That one is even worse. If you’re going to feed me, let’s switch to strawberries instead. Maybe those will be less offensive. You never can tell with Morty food. Sometimes it’s tolerable. Sometimes it’s torment.”

  “Maybe you should bring your own food, and I should bring mine from now on,” I said. It seemed like a fair compromise.

  “Just don’t blame me if my grapes and strawberries taste better than yours.”

  Elric and I spent hours lounging and snuggling in bed. He didn’t try to pressure me to eat from the picnic, and he didn’t complain when I ate my granola bar instead—even when it fell apart and got crumbs everywhere.

  “Is it too risqué to take off our clothes and roll around naked in bed?” Elric asked, nuzzling his nose against my neck.

  It certainly was tempting. Though if I was naked in bed, I was certain I would be inclined to do something that might awaken my affinity, and I would need to meditate afterward. Either I would have to explain that or get away to spend time alone.

  He hugged me closer.

  “Jeb might catch us,” I said. “It wouldn’t look like I’m breaking up with you if he catches us naked.”

  What if the bottle of whiskey hadn’t done the trick and Jeb was actually spying on us to catch me being sneaky so he could kick me out of the school?

  “Maybe another time,” I said.

  “How about rolling around in bed with clothes on?”

  I shook my head at him.

  “Kissing?”

  “One more kiss, but then I should be going back.”

  He made that one kiss count.

  On the way back into the school, Thatch stood in the hallway to my dorm room. It was rare to find him out of the dungeon, let alone near the women’s dormitories.

  “Miss Lawrence,” he said with a curt bow.

  “What are you doing, skulking around up here? Please say you aren’t spying on women getting undressed.”

  “It sounds as though you’re allowing Josephine Kimura’s prejudices to influence you.” He crossed his arms and looked me up and down. “Where have you been? You weren’t in your room, and you weren’t in your classroom.”

  “None of your business.” I tried to step past him, but he blocked my path.

  “Jeb told me you said you decided your magical education was more important than . . . dating. If that is the case, I commend you for being rational and clearheaded . . . for once.” His brows lifted, inviting me to argue.

  I held my tongue, not wanting to give away anything about my love life.

  He dipped his head in acquiescence. “It is selfless of you to sacrifice your own happiness for that of your students. Imani has you to thank for being allowed to stay here.”

  Trepidation settled like a lump in my stomach. He knew I’d been with Elric. He had a talent for laying on the guilt in that subtle way of his. He was so good at making me feel ashamed of myself.

  “What do you want?” I asked.

  “I came to speak with you about Imani and Maddy. What day is it most convenient for your fairy godmother to take Maddy in?”

  The rest of the conversation was about arrangements and banal matters, but as he gazed down at me, I knew he knew. That imperious eyebrow skewered me with accusations. The entire time he was secretly pointing out how disappointed he was with me that I would risk my education and Imani’s safety by continuing to secretly date Elric.

  Worst of all, I knew he was right.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  The Torturer’s Apprentice

  The first week of break after Vega had gone, I considered asking Imani to share my dorm room with me so she wouldn’t be so far away and alone, but I decided I’d better not. Besides the fact that Elric might show up at any moment unexpectedly, Thatch had given me specific homework to do that required not having a roommate.

  The first couple of days Imani and I spent our time decorating my dorm room with colorful art. Creating beautiful watercolors was therapy for the end-of-the-year stress and busyness we’d just survived. After our first few days of relaxation, Thatch wrote out a three-page script I was to recite as Imani meditated to further her education. He made her sit in his torture chair in his office. Unlike when I meditated, he didn’t tell her she couldn’t wear a sweater and pants. Also, he was far kinder to her with her first lesson. He didn’t force her to face her deepest fears or make her learn pain magic. Her first lesson was to connect with her affinity and be aware of it.

  Thatch sat in his comfy ergonomic chair, listening as I stumbled through the script I had failed to memorize in the two days since he had given it to me. His handwriting was swirling, looping cursive that I couldn’t even read half the time. Every time Thatch corrected me, Imani giggled.

  Apparently, my voice wasn’t as sleep-inducing as his, because Imani fidgeted in the chair. After enduring my first fumbled attempt to give a guided meditation, Thatch snatched the papers from my hands, rolled it up, and hit me on the head with it before proceeding.

  “You find your limbs feeling heavy with sleep. Let all the tension in your muscles drain away.” He managed to make his voice soothing and tranquil even as he gave me a dirty look.

  After about two minutes, Imani’s head sank down and she was asleep. I sat on the edge of Thatch’s desk, and he poked me in the thigh with his wand. He shook his head at me. I scooted off. It wasn’t like he didn’t ever sit on his desk. He was such a hypocrite.

  Each morning Thatch tried to teach me what I needed to do to help Imani improve her visualization techniques and focus so that she could concentrate on her affinity. In the afternoons or evenings Imani and I practiced foreign languages, memorizing spells, collecting herbs in the greenhouse, and small charms and spells Thatch insisted were remedial even though I suspected they weren’t. Or maybe they were just pointless for me since I didn’t have enough magic to do spell work.

  Imani made some progress, though.

  Our rigorous studies left little time for anything else. I did manage to sneak away for a short walk with Elric, but I was caught by Sam, the school’s satyr groundskeeper, as I tried to exit the school grounds for the woods.

  “You shouldn’t go into the forest alone,” Sam said in his thick Transylvanian accent. “It’s too easy for you to wander off school property and pass into werewolf and chimera territory.”

  “I won’t go far,” I promised.

  The trees at the entryway of the path creaked ominously, the clicking of their twiggy branches rustling like words. Sam rubbed at his hairy chest, listening to what the trees told him.

  Surely his tree friends were tattling on me. Sam gave me a hard look. “Who are you going to see?”

  “No one,” I said quickly.

  Sam crossed his arms, unconvinced. I was afraid he might tell Jeb on me.

  I circled around the school and left by the other path, traveling through the forest to make my way around without being spotted. When I finally met up with Elric, we discussed our plan and ways we would avoid getting caught. We would use a code in our letters to arrange days and times to meet in the forest. Elric’s guards would create a distraction on the opposite side of the school so that Sam wouldn’t catch me.

  I hoped it would work.

  One morning after one of my more successful guided meditations with Imani as Thatch watched, he dismissed her to go play outside while we talked about my education.

  “You haven’t come to me for lessons on taming your affinity lately,” Thatch said.

  “I know. I’ve been busy and . . . it’s embarrassing.”

  “You don’t have to do the work. If you don’t want to regain your affinity, it will make my life easier. You won’t draw in Fae if you don’t have magic.”

  But I did want to learn magic. I wanted my affinity back. That was part of why I had agreed to Jeb’s terms.

  I tried to get past my embarr
assment. “Can we . . . what if we set up an appointment? That way, I can ensure Imani is occupied at that time and knows I’m . . . meditating while you’re going to help me with a lesson.”

  He agreed.

  My first attempt to practice on my own was unsuccessful, possibly because I hadn’t tried much self-gratification after the previous disasters in my life. I showed up at my appointment with Thatch half an hour late. I was prepared for him to chew me out.

  Instead he simply smirked and raised an eyebrow. “Lost track of time?”

  “No, I couldn’t make it work. I don’t have a lot of experience with this.”

  “Practice makes perfect.”

  I was a failure at magic now and at sex. Tears filled my eyes. This was not how I envisioned magical training.

  “It’s not a race, you know. You don’t need to get your magic back immediately. And you don’t need to make yourself feel bad about not succeeding the first time. That pressure isn’t going to help you.”

  I nodded.

  “How about we block out some time for you to . . . practice in the evening? If you can stimulate yourself to the point of affecting your affinity, knock on my door, and I will assist you with the meditation. I leave the dungeons unlocked in the summer. You’ll be able to get in. Will that work for you?”

  I nodded. I wanted to thank him, but that wasn’t a good habit to get into. Instead I said, “You’re being nice to me. Wow.”

  “Don’t get used to it.” His eyes danced. “How about a pain control lesson instead?”

  Ugh! I had been wrong about him being nice. This was my true punishment for failure. The weird thing about this meditation, it was actually sexier than self-stimulation.

  I was aware of Thatch sitting close, his hand on my wrist to hold it still as he pinched me. I blocked the pain better than last time. As I meditated, my subconscious took over. Thatch kissed me passionately and told me to block that. My affinity flared—not from the pleasant touch I wanted—but from an unusual mixture of pain and the caresses my mind imagined.