The Healer’s Mantle
Page 17
Adia quickly nodded that she understood what Urilla Wuti was saying.
“Someone can learn how to establish the Connection if the raw ability is there. But it is more than just making the Connection; it is learning how to manage the current—the flow of it. How to maintain it, so it does not break and does not allow you or the other to go too deep. This is the most intimate exchange between two people. It is an art, not a science. Even at the shallowest level, the flow can fluctuate if you are not vigilant. For that reason, there can be few secrets in any Connection, and you must never make a Connection with anyone Without Their Consent,” she continued.
Without Their Consent. Adia’s eyes widened and then changed to a frown. “Urilla Wuti—” she said, formulating a question.
“Yes, I know. I know Khon’Tor seeded your offspring. I know what happened was done Without Your Consent. I also understand your reasons for not revealing the crimes he committed against you. I respect your decision in this regard. Your secret is safe with me, I promise.”
Adia let out a huge sigh and fought back her tears.
“We have a little more time before you deliver, Adia. We will make the most of it. Whether it is a vestigial ability from the Ancestors that still manifests in only a few, I do not know. You, I believe, have great aptitude for learning this if you want to. But there are requirements of any who accept it. It is a gift, and it is also a burden,” she said.
“If you think I am worthy of your time, Urilla Wuti, I very much want to learn how to do this,” said Adia, though concerned that when it came to meeting the requirements, she was not the best example.
The other Healer replied, “Adia, you are definitely worthy. You forget your situation was forced upon you. You bear the blame for it publicly, but you must separate it from the truth. In the distorted perception of yourself that you see reflected in other people’s eyes, do not lose sight of who you truly are.”
Adia took her leave and lay late into the night hours unable to sleep.
Chapter 10
The weeks following passed quickly. Urilla Wuti spent as much time with Adia as possible, teaching her about the Connection. Adia learned how difficult it was to control the flow and could understand how it took years of practice not to get lost in the other person. There were dangers too, as Urilla Wuti had said. Some emotional wounds were so horrific that they were unbearable to assimilate. The effects could linger after the Connection was broken, making a time of cleansing critically important.
As a Healer using this tool, there were also responsibility issues. If the person with whom the Healer connected had unresolved trauma or deep, unrelenting grief, she had an obligation to help them. And there was the fact that in return, the Healer exposed her experiences to the other.
Urilla Wuti shared her fears about Wrak-Ayya, the Age of Shadows. Adia quickly understood the importance of establishing a network of Healers who could unite the People through this form of communication, unrestricted by the physical constraints of Etera.
Over time, Urilla Wuti established deeper and deeper Connections with Adia, showing her how each level brought their consciousness even closer to that of the other. Adia could see the stronger the Connection, the harder it would be not to lose yourself. And it was enthralling, connecting with another at such a level. No loneliness; the deep awareness that you were not alone—that you were never truly alone because everyone was already united in the Mother, and each would experience it themselves when they returned to the Great Spirit.
* * *
The deeper Urilla Wuti connected with Adia, the longer it took her to clear herself of Adia’s emotions. During the first Connection Urilla Wuti had learned of Khon’Tor’s attack; had lived through it. At deeper levels, she experienced more deeply Adia’s feelings for Acaraho. And she experienced the horror of the High Council’s ruling that Adia’s offspring would be turned over to the Leader’s Mate, who hated her. The pain was almost unbearable, the idea of giving her offspring over to an enemy.
It was unfair to have forced Adia to make this choice, though Urilla Wuti understood why the High Council had not interfered with Hakani’s claim. But choosing not to interfere in something is one thing, and having to live through it is another. I wish I could share the depth of Adia’s anguish with the High Council members.
There was something else Urilla Wuti had learned during their most recent Connection. Something about Adia’s condition that led the visiting Healer to cease her lessons until after the delivery. She did not want what she had learned to pass back to Adia, because it was obvious Adia did not know. And Urilla Wuti knew it would be best to deal with at the time—when there was no choice. Facing it earlier was not going to make it any easier or any less painful.
Urilla Wuti worked with Nadiwani on preparing everything they could think of that might be needed for the delivery. Nadiwani was learning a great deal because the older Healer was a storehouse of information. So when Urilla Wuti was not teaching Adia, she was teaching Nadiwani.
Urilla Wuti asked for some unusual items from the storehouse without explaining their purpose.
* * *
The delivery room was finished. Urilla Wuti did not want Adia to give birth in the Healer’s Quarters because she did not want the memory of the delivery to hang in those rooms for the rest of Adia’s life. Urilla Wuti was doing all she could to remove any daily reminders of Adia’s offspring after the fact. She asked Acaraho to prepare a place and to pick one not on a common route. She asked him to furnish it with items recognizable to Adia so she would give birth in as relaxing and familiar a place as possible, as was customary.
So Acaraho hung dried flowers and herbs from the roof and placed baskets of grasses around the room. He created a raised sleeping mat to be padded with fresh grass and leaves when Adia went into labor, in case she wished to lie down at any point. Nadiwani gave him one of Adia’s favorite wolf skins to place on the bed. Acaraho whitewashed the walls with chalk to give a softer appearance than the greys and browns of the natural rock. Then he set out pretty stones where they would be out of Adia’s way when the time came.
He could have asked any of several people to undertake this work, but he completed it all himself.
Time was drawing close. Khon’Tor was notified, as was Hakani.
Acaraho had not forgotten his orders from the High Council to select a Helper for Hakani. He had narrowed the list down to three. He had spoken to each of them and explained the responsibilities—which would primarily be to help with the offspring and to report to him immediately anything that gave any concern for the offspring’s welfare. The three were the first outside of the inner circle to know that Hakani would be raising Adia’s offspring as her own. Acaraho knew Khon’Tor would have to handle the general announcement but was confident that none of the three candidates would disclose the information ahead of time.
Acaraho had little contact with Adia after the Healer arrived. He knew from Awan that Adia left her quarters regularly to visit Urilla Wuti. He did not like being cut off, but he had his other responsibilities to attend to; however, now he wanted to see first-hand how Adia was doing. He would leave to her the final decision of which of the three candidates he would assign to Hakani.
Acaraho found Adia with Nadiwani and asked permission to join them. He had not seen the Healer for a while and immediately noticed how far along she was. He could not imagine it would be much longer. Adia now had trouble getting around, and his heart went out to her. All this, and she must give up her offspring—to that female.
He questioned the High Council’s judgment before remembering that they genuinely did not have further jurisdiction in this matter. They had done all they could by putting a Helper in the environment to keep an ongoing eye on the offspring’s care.
Adia was lying curled up on her side on her sleeping mat—the only comfortable position available to her at this point. Acaraho crouched down beside her, one hand steadying himself against the floor, so she did not have to sit u
p.
Urilla Wuti was at the worktable with Nadiwani, gathering up everything that they would take to the delivery room. Urilla Wuti’s two large carrying satchels were coming in very handy.
Adia smiled up at Acaraho when she saw him, and he smiled back in return. He tried to think of something light-hearted to say, but nothing came to mind. So instead, he reached out and touched her cheek gently with the back of his hand.
“Adia, I have narrowed the list of potential helpers for Hakani down to Kachina, Awahi, and Amadahy. I wanted to leave the final selection to you, since—” and he stopped, not wanting to say the rest of the sentence lest it be hurtful to her.
“Thank you, Acaraho. I know each of them and you have done well. Any of the three would be a fine choice. My preference, though only because of size and strength, would be Kachina,” she answered.
Of the three, Kachina was the largest and most robust of the females. Acaraho did not know if her consideration was for the sake of protecting the offspring, or for some reason having to do with Khon’Tor. But he did not ask.
“I will tell Kachina and the other two, as well as Khon’Tor and Hakani,” he said gently.
“When the time comes for the offspring to be born, I will be right outside the door for as long as you need me. I promise.”
She took his hand and squeezed it for just a moment.
Acaraho stood up and crossed the room to the other two females. “How long; can you give me any idea?” he asked.
Urilla Wuti replied. “Within days, Commander. I would stay close.” Those were the most words Acaraho had heard her say since she arrived.
“Commander,” she added before he could leave, “When the time comes, I want only myself and Nadiwani in the room, and no one else unless I choose them. Anything I ask for, everything I say, must be followed exactly, and without hesitation,” she said.
“Kachina will serve as a general helper as required because she is close to the situation and her services as observer will not be needed until we give the offspring into Hakani’s care.”
Acaraho nodded.
“Please send word for my attendants to come as soon as possible,” she added. “They will not be long arriving, Commander. They have known for a while that the time was drawing near. One of them is my midwife, and I want her here in time for the delivery. If you send a messenger in the direction we came, he will find them not too far away,” she added.
Well, how in Etera would they know that? he wondered. Unless just from experience. He nodded again and left the three females.
The moment he could, Acaraho sent a messenger to find the attendants, and had living quarters set up for them. Urilla Wuti was right; they were only a day’s journey from Kthama. They had known the time was close because they were expecting the messenger.
A few more days passed, and then the time came when Adia entered early labor.
Urilla Wuti had not yet moved her to the delivery room, wanting to keep Adia in familiar surroundings as long as possible. The delivery room was a dedicated and fully functioning separate living quarters, and all Urilla Wuti’s supplies and preparations had been moved there, including her two large satchels and wrappings for the offspring.
Finally, it was time. Nadiwani stepped outside and asked Awan to tell Acaraho that Adia was in labor and they were moving to the delivery room, and to send Kachina.
* * *
Acaraho was sitting in his quarters, his head in his hands. He was filled with nervous energy and unable to stay in one position for long. He tried to push away his fears that something might go wrong and that something might happen to Adia, but they still haunted him from the back of his mind. He did not believe he could be more concerned if it were his own offspring being born. He jumped off his seating stone at the sound of a visitor.
It was Awan. “Commander, it is time. Urilla Wuti wants Kachina to come to the delivery room.”
For the first time in his life, Acaraho froze.
Awan looked at him blankly, then said a little too loudly, “Commander!”
Acaraho snapped out of his confusion, came to, and left with Awan. He told the guard where to find Kachina and went himself to notify Khon’Tor and Hakani. He wanted to send a messenger but knew it should come from him.
He went down the corridor, past two somewhat nervous guards who exchanged glances as their commander headed for Khon’Tor’s door. Acaraho looked back at them, wondering what their cause for concern could be. He slammed the announcement rock against the door and stood back. Then he smashed it again, harder.
No response.
It was evening, but early evening, and before setting out, Acaraho had confirmed both were in the Leader’s Quarters.
Finally, though unprecedented, he called out, “Khon’Tor,” and the stone door was suddenly jerked open from the inside.
Acaraho had interrupted something. Khon’Tor was agitated and stood blocking the line of sight into the room. He had a firm grip on the stone slab, making sure that no one could open it any wider.
“Yes, Acaraho?” he asked brusquely, out of breath even. Acaraho could not help but notice scratches on Khon’Tor’s neck and arms.
“Urilla Wuti sent me to tell you that it will not be long now. Kachina is being brought to the delivery area and will keep you informed about the birth,” he explained. He kept his eyes locked on Khon’Tor, resisting the temptation to try and see past him. The Leader was making it very clear that whatever was going on in there was none of Acaraho’s business.
“Anything else?”
“I apologize for the intrusion, Khon’Tor. I thought you should know,” said Acaraho.
“Yes,” Khon’Tor replied, straightening himself a bit before he pulled the huge stone closed behind him, obviously still taking care to block the view of his quarters even as the stone door was sliding back in place.
Acaraho had never mated, but he was not ignorant of the mechanics. He had no doubt that he had interrupted something personal between Khon’Tor and Hakani. There were reported to be those whose tastes strayed into grey areas outside commonly practiced behaviors. Acaraho had assumed Khon’Tor’s attack on Adia was the result of a fight and that he had done what he did out of a loss of control. After what he had just seen, he wondered if Khon’Tor had been out of his senses when he forced himself on Adia. Perhaps it was the vein in which his tastes ran.
Acaraho sighed. Hakani has shown she has no qualms speaking her mind. She could certainly bring a complaint. What consenting adults participate in is none of my business.
But if true, it was one more piece of information about Khon’Tor that Acaraho wished he did not know.
When he passed the two guards on the way back out, he understood their earlier reactions to his arrival.
They are not far enough out of earshot, after all, he thought.
* * *
Acaraho arrived at the Delivery room, and Urilla Wuti admitted him. For now, Adia was lying on the raised bed he had prepared, and he bent to take her hand for a moment.
Adia and Acaraho were both so wrapped up in the drama of what was going on that they still had no thought of how things looked to observers. It was Acaraho who was constantly tending to Adia. It was Acaraho making all the arrangements, and now he was at her side, comforting her as she was about to deliver her offspring. Of course most concluded that he was the father.
“When Kachina arrives, have her wait outside with the others. I will bring in one or both of my two attendants and then the door will be tightly closed,” Urilla Wuti told him
He noticed one of the attendants was a female. He knew two males had been accompanying her on her arrival at Kthama.
It was customary among the People for the mother to be as little disturbed as possible, but Urilla Wuti was not leaving things to chance. “Under no circumstances is anyone to enter this room until I say. When I do signal to open the door, everything must be done as I direct,” she went on to say.
Urilla Wuti had kind eyes, which h
elped offset the fact that she had no trouble speaking her mind. Acaraho imagined that if she were angry, she would most resemble a honey badger. He had no intention of doing anything but what she requested, though he thought her orders were overly strict. Acaraho realized he would miss her once she left.
“I understand, Urilla Wuti. You are the one in charge,” he said, smiling at her.
Urilla Wuti then surprised Acaraho by placing her hand squarely in the middle of his chest. “I will miss you too, Commander,” she said, smiling at him in return.
Acaraho was touched. He thanked the Great Spirit that she was the one the High Council had sent to care for Adia.
Kachina arrived as ordered but was not allowed into the delivery room. Urilla Wuti asked for her female attendant to enter the room, however, and for the male attendant to remain outside. Then Acaraho handed Urilla Wuti an announcement stone and closed the heavy stone door as instructed.
Now it was just a matter of time.
* * *
The four females settled in and waited. Adia became more and more uncomfortable, and moved from position to position, alternately pacing the room, leaning against the stone table Acaraho had installed, sometimes sitting on the semi-circular birthing rock, supported by Nadiwani and Urilla Wuti in turns. The rock was padded with soft skins and had a large, soft pile of leaves and skins beneath it for when the offspring would be born. Eventually, it became obvious that Adia was very close to delivering. Urilla Wuti checked the offspring’s position and pronounced that everything was as it should be.