Mayfly

by Rei Fletcher

  Ash covered her hand, showing her what she wanted. Marianne's eyes slid closed, lost in her exploration, smiling at the soft moans she was creating. Cool air brushed her back as Ash lifted her T-shirt and she sat up, pulling it off. Ash's fingers slid under the sports bra, peeling it up gently up. Marianne braced herself against the roughness to come.

  Ash drew her down and took a nipple into her mouth. Her lips, her tongue, her hands, were hungry, but gentle, teasing sounds from Marianne that she'd never made: surprise and pleasure that came effortlessly. Her hands slid over dark brown hair, holding her close.

  "Ash…"

  "Do you like it?" Her lips brushed over Marianne's skin as she spoke. Shivers spread from the coolness, the warmth, the touch of her tongue.

  "Yes. Please…"

  The night air and the teasing wetness of her mouth as she moved from one breast to the other drove Marianne crazy. She braced one hand against the seat, the other exploring Ash's body whenever she could form a logical thought.

  She felt her jeans being opened, then soft fingers. Ash smiled up at her.

  "You're so wet."

  She started to look away, embarrassed, but Ash kissed her before she could. Her fingers slipped delicately into her, only just touching her, and Marianne came, shuddering.

  "Sorry," she mumbled, when she could think again.

  "Why would you apologise for something as sweet as this?"

  "It was pretty fast."

  "It was perfect." She teased again, slow, deliberate, knowing, until Marianne had to drive against them, spinning into another orgasm.

  She collapsed against her shoulder.

  "Oh."

  "Hm." Ash's hand withdrew. Marianne opened her eyes to see Ash licking her fingers.

  "Weird."

  "What?"

  "Bo...I mean, isn't it..." She trailed off. Ash touched her cheek, thumb brushing over her lips.

  "Isn't it delicious? That's what you meant to say, yeah?"

  "I heard it was gross."

  "From the boy?"

  Marianne felt the blush rise in her face. Fucking Bobby, who explained to wide-eyed, stupid her when they started making out that women tasted gross because it was all exposed, like old swamp water, but men tasted great because somethingsomething diets. It wasn't like the sex ed books explained anything like that, and eavesdropping in the girls' change room made it seem right.

  Smooth fingers trailed down her spine. "I only like things that taste good."

  "Ash!"

  She kissed her softly. "He probably likes shite beer, too."

  "Molson," she offered absently.

  "There you are, then. No appreciation for the finest things."

  Cool air made its way under her jeans. Ash's hand fitted itself against Marianne's ass. No grasping, just a caress. Marianne's breath caught. She couldn't think of anything for the moment, but that, and her.

  "We need to drive back. You're gone too long from your ma."

  "I don't want to leave." She teased Ash's nipple with her fingertip, just barely touching it, earning a moan.

  "The light will catch us, my darling, but we'll find the dark again."

  The sky was greying by the time Ash dropped her off, growing even lighter as they kissed goodbye. Marianne felt like she was floating as walked home. She discarded her clothes on the floor, crawling into bed. As soon as the silence settled around her all of the sensations came flooding back. With a moan, she reached between her legs, lost in bliss.

  When she finally dragged herself out of bed her mom was sitting at the kitchen table, sifting through bills. Marianne braced for a comment, but her mom only glanced up.

  "How are you feeling?"

  "Just a little sleepy."

  "That'll happen. Hey, that isn't good for you."

  Marianne stirred sugar into her coffee. "Probably not."

  "I made a doctor's appointment for tomorrow at three."

  "Ah, okay. Cool." She'd need the car then.

  "Do you need a little money? Mark finally paid me for working that concession at the drag races."

  "No, it's fine."

  "It'll be good for you to have a little time with Charlene, especially now. Before things get crazy."

  She wondered where her mom's newfound generosity was coming from. "Yeah, the two jobs thing is gonna suck." She searched through the pile of papers on the counter for the training schedule but couldn't find it. She couldn't have missed a shift; her mom would've chewed her out by now.

  "Well, we'll talk about that. I think I still have an in at the mill, so things might be a bit easier then. Anyway, don't you think you should hurry? She said two o'clock at the mall, didn't she?"

  "When—" She thought of the messages she hadn't looked at. "Shit."

  She showered and did her makeup in a rush. Her mom left while she was fishing under the bed for her bag of new clothes. She pulled on the fancy underwear with a feeling of ceremony. Then the nicest T-shirt she'd bought, and jeans, because that's what she had.

  Ash kissed me. Ash liked it. I liked it.

  She spent a moment thinking about it. The drive...She wished she was back in the car, nothing but Ash and the sound of the engine, and Fleetwood Mac on the radio.

  More than a minute, then. She was late, jog-walking through the food court. Maybe she should have taken her mom up on the offer of money; the smell of freshly grilled hamburgers was driving her crazy.

  Their usual meeting spot was near one of the back entrances of the mall. It was deserted when she got there. She leaned against the wall, quickly wishing she had a book, or better yet, a hunt. The Unformed Beasts seemed to be nocturnal, and the slithering things were gone. Ash said they were gone, and she'd watched the disintegration of the bug monster herself. Maybe other things moved around in the daylight. She could take care of those.

  Was it the sun? She should ask. Maybe Ash could move around underground, even during the day.

  After half an hour hunger won out over patience. She abandoned her wait and used some of her precious hoard of money to get a burger, extra pickles, inhaling it almost as soon as she sat down. Immediately she felt more charitable toward Charlene. Something had probably come up. Or maybe her mom got the information wrong. Anyway, she got a burger out of the day, and she was already here, so she could window shop a bit.

  Eventually, the lure of new music drew her to the record store. Her Christmas present had been practical clothes for school. It was...something. Ironic, maybe. Her mom had IOUed on her birthday, though, and Smashing Pumpkins had a new album.

  She was bobbing along with it at the listening station, trying to decide if they were still good, when she saw Charlene through the window of the store across the way. She took off the bulky headphones and grabbed her bag. There was still time to get some fun in before she had to go.

  When she straightened she froze. Bobby was laughing with Charlene, easy and careless. Charlene had always acted kind of nervous around him before, because of her crush. All of that was gone. The way they leaned together made them really look like a couple.

  Maybe they should be. Maybe they could be, now. When she prodded her feelings, she came up empty. The jealousy she expected was non-existent.

  Anyway, you cheated. All he's doing is hanging out at the mall.

  At least if she didn't count the rumours. Candace from Math class. Jen from PE. Those were only ever stories, passed along like a game of telephone.

  She didn't really feel like joining them as some awkward third wheel. They disappeared deeper into their store and she left, making a beeline toward the bus stop.

  By the time the sun went down, she was waiting outside Ash's house. Like a puppy, but she didn't care. When the door opened, she stood up from the stairs. Ash was wearing a rumpled T-shirt and sweats, and her braid was a little frayed from sleep. Marianne wondered how she could rumple when she didn't move. She didn't wonder for long; Marianne kissed her, or they kissed each other, and it wiped her mind of anything else.

>   "Morning," she said.

  "So to speak." Ash's eyes were bright and warm, no matter how cool the hands resting low on her back, lightly possessive. Marianne took a deep breath, and let herself belong.

  "Nothing new to report. Boring day."

  "My poor hunter."

  The house was cool and dim. Ash turned on a lamp and the TV, probably for Marianne's benefit. The news was on and they were talking about the explosion. They'd discovered it was linked to a theft at a mining company. No clue why someone would want to blow up the house of a salesman and a dentist.

  "Are you safe?"

  "I took care of things."

  No one said anything about holes or bugs or leeches. However post-apocalyptic the landscape was, she didn't feel bad. Nothing good was left alive there by the time the bomb went off.

  "Did you get hurt in the explosion?"

  "Only after one of those things jumped on me."

  "A leech thing?"

  Ash nodded. She rubbed her arms, and Marianne knew exactly what she was thinking, because she wanted to do it, too, any time she thought of them. She touched her shoulder. Ash reached for her and they shifted and adjusted each other until they were settled comfortably. Ash curled a bit of Marianne's hair around her finger.

  "There are more to hunt."

  "We'll find them," Ash said, with no room in her voice for doubt.

  "Can we kill him?"

  "I've tried before."

  "Alone?"

  "Well…"

  Marianne smiled. "You aren't alone, now. I'm here." She turned. Ash's cheek was so smooth under her fingers. "I'll help you. We can do it together."

  "Can we now?"

  Marianne giggled. "Oh god, I sound like an idiot."

  Ash touched her mouth. Marianne's lips parted, and she sucked gently at her fingers. Ash's eyes were intent.

  "I'm old, Marianne."

  "So? You don't look old." Marianne turned over, sitting on her. Ash's hands settled on her hips. She couldn't help a little grind, feeling a rush of pleasure at Ash's appreciative smile.

  "You know why I don't."

  "If we wait for me to be your age I don't think I'll be this hot bit of tail anymore." She wasn't good at flirting talk, but Ash didn't look like she minded.

  "Marianne…"

  "I was old enough to make a bad choice to keep fucking a guy when I didn't really care about him anymore. Why aren't I old enough to make a good choice and sleep with you?"

  "Are you sure I'm a good choice?"

  "You're my choice."

  Ash moaned and sat up quickly, red lips crushing against Marianne's mouth. She felt a swift, sweet pain, and tasted blood.

  "I'm sor—"

  Marianne kissed her again, surging with joy when Ash pulled her close. It was a twist in her heart and a direct line down between her legs. Without relinquishing her hold Ash stood up. Marianne wrapped her arms and legs around her, mouth against the soft skin of her neck.

  We're going to bed. She's taking me to bed.

  Ash took her to bed. Whatever she didn't know, Ash showed her.

  "Holy shit."

  Ash smiled and stretched like a satisfied cat, hand splayed over Marianne's stomach. "My blushes."

  "I didn't..." She squirmed. Slowly, because Ash had left her feeling boneless and...languid. God. The sheets were soaked. "You were right. It was…"

  "Delicious?" Her lips skimmed over her cheek. When she couldn't answer, even though they both knew what it would be, Ash just kissed her. Marianne's hands smoothed down her braid.

  "I didn't think I was...gay. I mean...I fucked Bobby. And he was playing me. That guy."

  "Some people like both. He played with your desire, as he played with your mind. It was part of his game. Don't judge yourself by it."

  "It was never like this with Bobby." Her hands fluttered down Ash's chest and stomach. She was beautiful to look at, to touch, to taste. Marianne ducked her head. "You aren't hairy. I like that."

  Ash laughed. Marianne watched her easy grace. Now that she could admit it and she was there, she couldn't look away.

  "Is this why I can call you? Because we—feel like this?"

  Ash considered. Marianne slipped the elastic from her braid and slowly untwisted the thick locks. The scent of her fancy shampoo filled the air.

  "I don't know why I can hear you."

  "Is it only when I'm scared? That would suck."

  "I think it might be strong feelings."

  "Like hunger?"

  "You haven't been so hungry since I've known you." Her hand skimmed down Marianne's body, making her shiver. "I felt it when you laid down with me."

  "Oh god. Sorry. That was…I didn't mean to be a pervert."

  "Not…" She was trying not to laugh. "Not that. It was nice. It was…contentment. Happiness. Strong enough for me to feel."

  It was a bit weird, Ash knowing so much more about her than the other way around.

  "'Lifted honest eyes for you to see, and caught your hand against my cheek and breast.'"

  Marianne could barely hear, her voice was so soft. There was so much in it that she felt like crying.

  Then Ash smiled, and Marianne hugged her as tightly as she could, content for some time just with that. When she finally moved again it was only enough to speak, lazily.

  "We could use that, right?"

  "What are you thinking?"

  "If I went back, I could distract him, then call you in at the right time."

  She felt the sudden tension in her. It was excitement. Eagerness.

  "No," she said finally, subsiding. "It's too dangerous for you. I'll not have you so close to him."

  "I can do it. I'm not afraid to fight."

  "I've fought him before. I've lost to him before. I won't lose you to him."

  She felt an embarrassed pleasure for being protected, and still. She could go herself, she thought. Ash would come when she was in danger, anyway.

  "I can see damned well that you're planning something."

  "Maybe."

  Ash sighed. "Then we'll plan together." Marianne was caught up in a tangle of excitement and fear. "Later." Her hand moved down. Marianne pressed eagerly into her touch.

  "Again?"

  Ash laughed. "The sweetest of challenges."

  Chapter 13

  Marianne was humming as she returned home. Gravel crunched under her boots. The sun was bright, the wind was cool. It was one of those gorgeous days. Perfect days. A day when the loud and angry songs didn't match.

  Idiot.

  She sang a bit of Dave Matthews. A guilty pleasure, but it fit perfectly. She ignored the trees at the side of the driveway. There was nothing there that could hurt her. Not now.

  I can go running later, maybe. Just a couple of kilometres. Get back into it. Maybe go find a financial aid office.

  As she crossed the patch of lawn in front of the trailer she heard voices floating through the open window. The screen obscured most of the details of the kitchen. She heard her mom's familiar tones, but not quite her words. John's truck wasn't outside. Anyway, sounded like a woman—

  "I'll get that for you, Mom."

  She stopped short. A wave of wrong, familiar and strange, rolled down her spine. It sounded like her, kind of. Like her on a recording.

  "You just sit there, honey. You need your rest."

  "It's fine! It's still so early, right? And these days they say that women should stay active."

  "I've noticed how much you've been sleeping. I thought something was up. I told John, even. Something is up with her."

  "It's gonna be great. I wish the wedding could be a little bigger."

  "You can splash out later, maybe. Like on an anniversary. Lots of people do that these days."

  "After Bobby graduates. I can work part-time for a few months more. It would be nice to move down with him."

  "It's your first. You should be with family. Sharon and I can help out. You don't realise now how hard it's going to be to start with."
>
  "I have books out to research it."

  "Always books." Her mom laughed. "You never would ask for help. Anyway, books can't prepare you for the real thing."

  She heard water running into the kitchen sink. Her mom was going to do the dishes.

  A face appeared, blurry, in the window. Her own face. She drew breath to shout. To scream.

  She watched herself hold a finger to her lips. She thought of her mom, and all of the ways she could be hurt in that kitchen, and slapped a hand over her mouth, whimpering softly.

  "I think I really do need to stretch my legs a bit. Get some fresh air."

  "Okay, honey. Don't forget about the doctor this afternoon."

  "Never. Oh my god, it will be the first picture of my baby!"

  The screen door slammed, and someone came out. Someone who looked exactly like her. It was her own hair in a ponytail. It wore her clothes and her shoes. It was her, walking down the swaybacked porch steps, almost bubbling over with fake cheer. When she saw it clearly, in the sun, she was hit with a wave of dizziness that made her stagger.

  "Oh, dear. Let me help you. We don't want you falling and hurting your little one."

  She jerked her hand back. "What—"

  "Quiet now. We don't want Mom noticing this. I'd have to take care of things. You don't want me taking care of things."

  Marianne swallowed back all the gibbering panic that threatened to burst out. The sound of rinse water reached her, and the rattle of dishes.

  "Good girl. Always so quiet. Always so cold. Always so much better than everyone else." It laughed. "How humiliating this year must be. No money. No school. Now you're knocked trash. It's everything you were so afraid to be." It jerked its head toward the back of the trailer park. "Come on. I think we have a lot to talk about."

  The back corner had once been a playground. It was grown over almost completely, small trees sheltering it from the wind and, more importantly, from the trailers around it. The other...her...sat on the splintered grey remains of the seesaw. It smiled, full of broken glass, and patted the space beside it.

  "Come, we have to rest while we can. The next year is going to be rough on us."

  Marianne stayed near the trees. Every time she looked at it she felt a wave of disgust. "What are you?"