This Is Crazy

by Natasha Madison

  “She got it so fucking good,” Vivienne says, slapping her hand on the table.

  “I swear we had sex five times, and I must have had ten orgasms,” I tell them. “And as soon as we finished, I craved it again.”

  “Snap,” Zoe says, “does he have a brother?”

  “I swear, this morning, I woke up, and the first thing I did was pounce on him.” I shake my head. “He was sleeping, and I put a condom on him and rode him.”

  “Jesus,” Zoe says. “I don’t think I’ve ever wanted it that bad.”

  “Then you aren’t getting it right.” Allison shocks us all. “Max is always up for it.” And I now cringe when Zoe yells, “Ewww.”

  “What? She’s allowed to talk about Evan and her pound town, but I can’t?”

  “Yes, because she isn’t married to him,” Zoe says. “I don’t have to sit at the table next to him wondering if you banged him before we have Sunday dinner.”

  “The answer is yes.” Allison sticks out her tongue. “If he is home, we have had sex at least once a day.”

  “Same,” Karrie says, and now I hold up my hand.

  “You are not allowed to tell us that because he is our brother. And isn’t he getting close to the age where he can have a heart attack from going at it that much?”

  Karrie rolls her eyes. “I fucking wish.” Zoe, Allison, and I just cringe while Vivienne smiles. “I came home from the gym the other day. I was sweaty and I stank, and he looked at me and said ‘You in the mood?’”

  “There has to be a cutoff age,” I tell them.

  “Not here,” Allison says. “Not even close.”

  “Anyway, can we focus on me for once?” I ask them. “What do I do?”

  “You fuck,” Vivienne says, laughing. “You bang and bang and bang again and again and again and again.” Then she looks at us. “I haven’t had sex in five months.” Now it’s our turn to look at her shocked. “I’ve been busy.”

  “Liar,” Karrie says, and now Vivienne glares at her. “But it’s not about her.”

  “Why don’t you just enjoy the moment?” Allison says.

  “He says I’m not allowed to touch myself if he isn’t here, and he left so many marks on me I am going to have to wear turtlenecks for the next week,” I tell them, and they all laugh.

  “I remember once I left a hickey next to Max’s dick, and Matthew saw it.” Allison laughs out loud. “He didn’t know I was the one, and when he found out, he threw up.”

  “Matthew is only allowed to leave them in places the kids can’t see,” Karrie says. “So basically I can’t go topless.”

  “Why is it these men are all about branding their women?” Zoe asks. “It’s a bit too much.”

  The rest of the chat goes smoothly, and I tell them about how I love him, and Zoe is the only one not surprised by this. When we finally hang up, it’s almost noon. I go back into his room and unpack my stuff, hanging what needs to be hung but leaving the folded clothes in the luggage by the wall. I grab a pair of yoga pants and a top and go to shower. Then I take my laptop and a notebook and make the kitchen table my office space.

  I’m so into booking my schedule and returning a bunch of emails I don’t even notice the front door open and then slam shut. I look at the clock and see that it’s only one thirty. I get up and walk around the counter and stop when I come face to face with a blonde. My heart speeds up.

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” she asks me, and I look to the side and see Lilo sitting beside me. “I can’t believe he would bring you here.”

  “I’m sorry.” I finally find my words. “Who are you?”

  “Me, sweetheart?” she says sarcastically. “I’m the one who is supposed to be here and not you.”

  So this is what it feels like to be mature. This is what it feels like not to fly off the handle and to take a second. “That doesn’t answer my question.” I fold my hands over my chest. “Who are you?”

  “I’m Candace, Evan’s sister.” She rolls her eyes, and I just look at her. “I swear he thinks with his dick all the time.” The words coming out of her mouth sting. I’m not going to lie, they also fucking hurt.

  “Now that you’ve answered the who you are question, perhaps you would like to answer why you are even here,” I ask her, looking around. “This isn’t your house.” Her eyes just glare at me. “I mean, unless you were here to pick something up.”

  “It’s our weekly meeting,” she hisses. “Jesus, aren’t you a sharp one.”

  Now, I’ve about had it, and my back goes straight and the little bit of maturity I have is about to go out the window. “I guess your weekly meetings just aren’t as important as you think they are since he didn’t even mention you coming over.”

  She laughs now. “You don’t really believe that he likes you, right?” she asks me and doesn’t wait for me to answer. “I mean, it’s all about publicity. He is banking on the biggest contract, and well, you just make it that much sweeter.” I was wrong before. Those other words were nothing because these words gut me. I don’t have a chance to say anything because the door opens and closes, and Evan looks at the sight before him. The smile leaves his face when he sees that I’m not smiling. I’m about to throw something across the room.

  “What the fuck is going on?” he asks, his eyes never leaving mine.

  “I was just telling her—” Candace starts, but I’m done with this bullshit right now, so I cut her off.

  “Yes, she was informing me that I’m not the smartest, that you always think with your dick, and let’s see, that this thing between us”—I point at him and then at myself—“is a publicity stunt.” I look at him and then look at Candace who just swallows now. “Am I missing anything?”

  “Candace,” he hisses, and I shake my head.

  “I’m going to just step outside,” I tell them, and she just rolls her eyes. I grab my phone and open the door and the dogs follow me outside. I walk to the couch in the middle of the yard, and I sit down, the lone tear rolling down my cheek. Lilo gets on the couch with me, putting her face on my legs, and Stitch sits in front of the couch looking at the door.

  “Well, that was fun,” I say to myself because the dogs don’t understand anything. “You see, the old Zara would have told her to fuck off and kicked her out of the house.” She looks up at me. “But the mature one who loves him and doesn’t want his family to hate me just got kicked in the vagina.” She tilts her head to the side. “Yeah, I liked the old Zara also.” I smile at her and rub her head. “She’d have a plan B just in case,” I tell them, opening up my American Airlines app.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Evan

  I slam the door behind me with a smile on my face, knowing in five seconds my lips will be on hers, and then I see the scene before me. She tells me what was being discussed and then turns on her heels. I watch her walk out of the house with the dogs behind her, and I count to ten before I turn on my sister. What started out as an amazing day is quickly going to shit. I turn to my sister, taking off the baseball hat I was wearing and throwing it on my couch.

  “Candace,” I say her name between clenched teeth. “I really fucking hope that what she said isn’t true.”

  “Oh, please,” Candace says. “You can’t tell me that this actually means something.”

  “I’m going to forget you just said that,” I tell her and then finally turn my head away from the window and turn to stare at my sister. “You came into my house.” My voice starts going a touch louder as my patience snaps. “And you said the most vile things to a woman you don’t even fucking know.”

  “Oh, I know her kind,” she says, and she must see my face because she stops talking.

  “Her kind?” I repeat her words. “You mean a smart, independent woman?”

  “I mean a puck bunny. God knows how many hockey guys she’s—”

  I put my hand up. “I’m going to stop you there before I do something that will be very bad for both of us,” I yell at her. “If you ever disres
pect her again …”

  “Disrespect her,” she huffs.

  “Don’t make me choose between you and her,” I tell her, shaking my head. “I called Mom today. Told her that she needs to come down this weekend to meet her.” She doesn’t say anything; she just lets her mouth hang open. “I love her, Can.” I tell her what I just told my mother. “It started out as a fluke, but fuck, I fell in love with her.”

  “You can’t be serious,” she finally says.

  “If it wasn’t crazy, I would ask her to marry me today,” I tell her. “If it wasn’t crazy, I would beg her to spend the rest of her life with me.” I finally take a deep breath. “I’m that serious, Candace.” I don’t know what I was expecting, but it was definitely not her turning and walking out the door, slamming my front door. I take my phone out and call my mother who answers on the first ring.

  “Twice in one day,” she says to me, laughing.

  “I’m giving you a heads-up.” My voice comes out harsher than I want, and my mother’s laughter stops. “I just walked in to a showdown between Candace and Zara.”

  “Oh my,” my mother says.

  “Mom, if I have to choose, I’m going to pick Zara,” I tell her. “Candace came into our house and said things I’m not even going to repeat.”

  “I’ll call her,” she tells me. “You know she is only looking out for you.”

  “I know that,” I tell her, walking to the door that leads outside, “but I’m only looking out for Zara.”

  “Go and make sure she is okay and then call me back so I can meet her,” she tells me. “Let me talk to Candace.”

  I put my phone down on the table next to Zara’s stuff, and I have to smile, seeing her stuff mixed with mine. I open the door and walk outside toward her couch. She is on her phone, and when I get closer, Stitch sits up and looks at me, and I swear I can hear Lilo growl at me.

  “Hey there,” I say. Walking to her, I lean down and kiss her lips. She kisses me back, which is almost a win. “Whatcha doing there?” I say, sitting next to her. Throwing my arm around her, I bring her close to me. I look at her phone and see the American Airlines app. “What is that?”

  “I was just looking at flights,” she says with a softness I’ve never heard from her.

  I turn in the couch now, and she still doesn’t look up. Reaching out, I lift her face to look in her eyes, and I see she is crying. “What is going on?” I bring her to me, hugging her. “Talk to me.” I move back so I can see her eyes, but she still won’t look up.

  “It’s stupid,” she says softly and uses her sweater to wipe her nose.

  “Nothing is stupid, sweet Zara.” I move her chin up again. “Please tell me why you’re crying.”

  “The things she said, Evan,” she says, and she blinks wiping away a tear. “They were harsh, and I just stood there.” She shrugs her shoulders. “The old Zara would have throat punched her, grabbed her bag, and took off. After she smashed her car by backing into it five times.”

  “Candace was out of line,” I tell her. “One hundred percent out of line and I told her it was unacceptable.”

  “I don’t even know her,” she says. “I’ve never met her in my life. She said I was a publicity stunt.”

  “I left practice thirty minutes early, and the first thing I did was call my mother,” I tell her, and she opens her eyes bigger. “They are flying in on Friday night for the game.”

  “I’ll go stay at a hotel,” she says, sitting up

  “Over my dead body. You sleep where I am,” I tell her. “I called her because I want her to meet you.” I grab her face in my hands. “I want her to see how amazing you are and how we are together. I just …” I try to find the words. “I want her to meet you ’cause I’m head over heels in love with you, and I want everyone to know it.”

  “But …” she says.

  “There is no but,” I tell her. “Do you love me?” I ask her, and she nods. “What would you do if that happened to me?”

  “What do you mean?” she asks me, tilting her head.

  “If you walked into the room and saw Matthew there, and he said stupid, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about stuff.”

  “I would put Nair in his shampoo bottle, and then put itching powder in his skates,” she answers without hesitation.

  “Jesus,” I say, laughing but knowing she probably would.

  “Three years ago, he pissed me off for, I can’t even remember, but we put gorilla glue on his hockey stick.” I can’t stop laughing now. “We still have the stick with the gloves stuck to it.”

  “I’m so sorry she hurt you,” I tell her, and she just shrugs. “I don’t ever want to be the source of your tears. I want to be the one who wipes them away.”

  She smiles at me. “Oh, you’re good.” I lean down, kissing her cheeks where the tears streamed down. “I’m sorry I doubted you,” she whispers, looking up at me. “I’m sorry that I doubted us.”

  “I’d really like to make it up to you?” I get off the couch and reach down for her, picking her up and tossing her over my shoulder. Her laughter fills the yard, making the dogs excited.

  “This is not the way to start foreplay.” She laughs, and I swat her on the ass. “Okay, that’s a start,” she says. I walk into the house, and the dogs follow me. I close the gate leading to the bedroom, and Lilo gives a little whine. I walk into the bedroom and see her suitcase opened by the wall.

  I drop her to her feet, and she moves the hair away from her face. “Why haven’t you unpacked?” I ask her, walking to the suitcase.

  “I did,” she tells me. “I hung up what needed to be hung.”

  “But what about this stuff?” I point at the luggage, and she shrugs.

  “I was going to put it in the guest room, but I didn’t know if I had to clear out drawers.” She sits on the bed.

  “Guest room?” I ask confused. “What?”

  “I can just leave them in there.” She points at the luggage, and I hate it. I walk over to my dresser and open a drawer, grabbing everything out.

  “There is a drawer,” I say, carrying all my clothes with me into my walk-in closet and dumping them on the floor. I walk back out and do the same thing with three other drawers. “Is that enough space?”

  “Are you crazy?” she shrieks. “Now I have to fold all your clothes. You could have just asked me to share it with you.”

  “Put your clothes in the drawers,” I tell her. I’m almost tempted to just grab everything from her luggage and shove it in there.

  She gets off the bed now, coming to me. “I thought you were going to make it up to me?” Pulling her shirt over her head, she’s standing there in just a bra. “I believe you said—”

  “I know what I said.” My hand reaches out and pulls her to me, my tongue slipping in with hers. My body releases the tension I felt when I saw her crying, when I saw her trying to leave.

  “I missed you,” I tell her, kissing her neck and then trailing kisses all the way down to the swell of her breast. Seeing my little red mark peeking out of the white bra, I touch it with my finger. “I don’t know what it is,” I tell her. “Seeing my mark on you.”

  “We have to talk about that,” she says, and I look up at her. “You can’t just leave them everywhere you please.” My eyebrow shoots up looking at her. “I work in fashion, so it’s going to be hard not wearing an outfit because I’m branded.”

  “What kind of fucking outfit are you wearing that they see my marks on you?” I ask her. “Who cares?”

  “I care,” she tells me. “How about a compromise?”

  I lean down and suck in another part of her flesh, leaving it red. “I’m listening,” I tell her, going to the other breast and leaving the same mark.

  “One a week,” she says, her voice going low when I move the cup of her bra off and her nipple pops out and into my mouth. “One a week.” She trails off, and then I feel her hands in my pants cupping my cock. There is no talking after that, but when I finally finish with her, she
has more red marks, and I’m not even sorry about it.

  We finally pull ourselves out of bed when it’s dark out, but only because the dogs have to eat. I watch her put her stuff away while I order food for us on my iPad. “I’m going to go feed the dogs,” I tell her, walking to my closet and grabbing a pair of shorts. When I come out of the closet, she is bent over, grabbing her stuff. “Now that is a sight,” I tell her, and she looks over at me, her hair failing down. I see the glitter in her eye as she opens her legs a tad more. “I need to eat, then I’m taking you just like that.”

  “Promises, promises.” She laughs when I walk out the door but not before biting her ass cheek.

  “Let’s get you some food,” I tell the dogs that are lying on the couch. I pick up my phone and see that I’ve missed a couple of texts from my mother.

  Mom: Spoke with your sister.

  Mom: I hope she listens.

  Then there is one from my sister.

  Candace: We have to discuss the rest of the season. I’m not going to do it at your house if she’s there.

  I shake my head and answer back.

  Me: So does this mean you quit?

  I am not going to let her act like a spoiled brat.

  She doesn’t take long to answer.

  Candace: I guess you are the one who has to decide that.

  Me: Candace, tomorrow at my house at eleven. If you aren’t here, that means you aren’t interested in working.

  I turn off the phone and make my way to the garage. The lights are on in the living room now, and she has turned on the television. “We need to go over a couple of things,” she says, coming into the living room from the kitchen. I see her wearing shorts and one of my shirts.

  “What’s that, beautiful?” I ask her, turning the channel and stopping on the New York game.

  “We need to go over our schedules,” she says. “I am going to be here until Monday, I think, or Tuesday, but then I have to fly back to Chicago.”

  “But then after Chicago, you are coming back here, right?” I ask her, and she just shrugs her shoulders.