by A. M. Myers
* * * *
“I’m exhausted,” Smith says and I glance over at him. “I think I’m gonna go pass out.”
“You can sleep in Theo’s room. It’s the room right at the top of the stairs,” Tate informs him with a smile. He nods and shoves himself off the couch.
“Night, y’all.”
“Goodnight, Luke,” Tate calls, not even sparing me a glance as she turns back to the TV where Vikings is playing. Sighing, I focus back on the screen but I can’t focus on the show. Not when she’s so close to me and still so goddamn far away.
“Tate?”
She arches a brow but doesn’t turn to look at me.
“Could we finally talk, please? I know how angry you are, baby, but there’s got to be a way we can work this out.”
Sighing, she meets my eyes. “What is there to work out, Lincoln? You lied to me and used me as a favor to Blaze. Now we can both move on.”
“I don’t want to move on. I know I lied to you and trust me, I hate that I did but everything I felt and everything you felt, that was all real. Hell, I wasn’t even supposed to make contact with you but once I saw you, I couldn’t stay away.”
“Really?” she asks, vulnerability creeping into her eyes and I sit forward, wishing I could pull her into my arms.
“Yes, baby. I defied Blaze’s order because there was just something about you that called to me. You were made for me.”
Her lip wobbles and her eyes shine with unshed tears as I hold my hand out to her, praying that she’ll take it. It feels like the heavens are shining down on me when she slips her hand into mine, standing up from the loveseat. Slowly, I pull her to me and into my lap, keeping an eye on her expression as hope wells up in my chest.
She straddles my legs and places her hand on my chest, right over my heart and peace settles over me as I suck in a breath.
“I miss you,” she whispers, so quiet that I almost don’t hear her. I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her closer.
“I miss you, too, Tate.”
Leaning down, she cups my face in one hand as her lips hover above mine and she meets my eyes, silently asking if I’m good with this but I’ll never deny her. I close the space between us, claiming her lips and groaning as she melts into me. My cock springs to life and I fist her hair, taking control of the kiss as I flick my tongue against the seam of her lips.
“Open up for me, baby.”
She sighs, giving me exactly what I want and I groan again when the taste of her favorite spearmint gum meets my tongue. She moans, grinding on my lap as she grips my shirt in her fists and I thrust up off the couch, desperate to remove the layers between us.
“If you don’t want this, you gotta stop me now,” I warn her and she shakes her head.
“Don’t stop.”
And just like that, it’s on. We’re a flurry of hands and frantic kisses as we both peel out of our clothes and the next thing I know, Tate is wrapping her hand around my bare cock. I groan, my head falling back on the couch as I suck in a breath. She straddles my legs again and lines the head up with her entrance before slowly sinking down.
“Fuck,” I hiss as her warmth envelops me and I grab her hips, digging my fingers into her flesh. Fisting a handful of her hair, I pull her lips down to mine and kiss her hard before pulling back just enough to whisper, “Ride me, gorgeous.”
She moans, pulling back and grabbing her tits as she bounces on top of me at the perfect tempo. Not too fast and not too slow but just enough to drive me out of my fucking mind. Just when I think that I’m going to lose it, she pauses and leans forward, kissing me so softly that my entire body goes lax. With a firm grip on the back of my neck, she teases me with her tongue and starts rocking her hips – slowly, seductively – and I feel a tingling at the base of my spine.
“Shit, I’m gonna come, baby.”
She shakes her head. “I’m not there yet.”
Reaching down between us, I find her clit and circle it with my thumb as she lets out a moan.
“Yeah, do that,” she says and stops moving her hips as I work her closer and closer to orgasm. Her head falls back and her chest rises and falls rapidly in front of me as she grips my shoulders, lost in a world of pleasure. She starts to tremble and I know I’m close so I start to pull away, wanting to finish with her.
“No, don’t stop,” she cries and I press my thumb against her clit again. Not like I could ever deny her anything she wants. I circle the sensitive nub again and again as I pinch her nipple and she screams as her pussy constricts around my cock. I let out a low groan and reach for her, ready to throw her down on the couch and fuck her senseless but she pushes away from me and stands up.
I frown but before I can reach for her or ask her what she’s doing, a shock rolls through my body and every muscles locks up to the point of agony. I look up at her, trying to understand what the fuck is happening when I see the Taser pull away from my skin.
“Motherfucker,” I hiss and she smirks.
“Now you know what it feels like to be used and lied to, Lincoln.”
As I slowly regain control of my body, she walks away from me in all her naked glory and slams the bedroom door shut.
Chapter Twenty-One
Tatum
“So, what happened last night?” I hear Smith ask from the front seat of the Camaro as I pretend to sleep in the back. Emma and Nix invited the whole club over for a barbecue and although I was reluctant to go, I wasn’t given much of a choice since Lincoln’s been a little pissy today. I smirk.
“What are you talking about?” Lincoln asks.
I peek my eye open just enough to see Smith shrug.
“I don’t know. I thought I heard y’all talkin’ last night.”
Lincoln glances in the rearview mirror before sighing and shaking his head. I don’t think he saw me watching him.
“Naw, man. We didn’t talk.”
“You sure? ‘Cause I could have sworn I heard y’all.”
“What the fuck are you trying to get at, Smith?”
Smith starts laughing. “Streak sent the camera feed to my phone, too, dumbass. I watched the whole thing.”
I bite my lip to hold back my giggle as Lincoln growls.
“What the fuck do you mean you watched the whole thing?”
“I mean,” he replies, getting himself under control. “I watched the two of you go at it like rabbits as soon as I went upstairs and I saw her tase your stupid ass before she walked away. That had to hurt like a bitch.”
“I could give you a demonstration so you’d know for sure,” Lincoln snaps and Smith laughs again, holding up his hands.
“Naw, man. I’m good. When are you going to give it up though?”
My heart pounds in my chest as I wait for Lincoln’s response. Last night turned out to be more real than I intended it to be. I wanted to get back at him; I wanted him to know how much he’d hurt me but I never intended to let him see past my defenses. I never once intended to admit that I missed him so much it was hard to function sometimes.
“Never. I’m never going to give up on us.”
Smith sighs, looking out of the passenger window for a second. “I don’t know, brother. Sometimes you’ve just got to cut your losses. There may be too much damage here.”
“I don’t believe that for a second. What I feel with her… I’ve never felt it before and it’s something I won’t feel with anyone else so I’m never giving up on that.”
Oh, hell, why does he have to say things like that?
“She might never forgive you.”
I open my eyes and find Lincoln staring at me in the rearview mirror. “Then I’ll spend every day of the rest of my life trying to win her back because there’s no one else on this earth for me.”
“It’s really too bad you couldn’t figure that out before you ruined us,” I snap, hoping he doesn’t pick up on how half-hearted it is. Truthfully, each day I’m warming up to him more and more. I’m still pissed as hell and nowhere ready to
forgive him but I can’t confidently say I’m through with him either. In those few weeks we were together, despite the multitude of lies he told, he also managed to steal my heart and mark me as his and if I walk away now, it will be with an empty chest.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” Smith says, smiling at me and I roll my eyes.
“You’re lucky I don’t pluck your eyes out for watching me have sex, Lucas,” I tell him and he has the decency to look embarrassed. He rubs the back of his neck and nods.
“Yeah, sorry about that.”
I shrug. “You should ask Lincoln to describe what it feels like to be tased so you can make a more informed decision next time.”
Lincoln flicks an annoyed glance to the mirror.
“You wouldn’t do that to me,” Smith says with little confidence.
“Wouldn’t I?”
“We’re here,” Lincoln growls as we pull down a dirt driveway that opens up to a large plantation house that takes my breath away.
“Jesus, they live here?” I whisper and Smith nods.
“Yeah, Nix bought it for dirt cheap and fixed it up.”
Lincoln parks the car next to a few bikes and the boys climb out first before Lincoln leans the seat forward and helps me out. I tuck the shoebox under my arm as I turn toward the house.
“What’s that?” he asks, pointing to the box and I glance down at it as I tuck it closer to my side.
“Something I need to show to Nix.”
Lincoln nods and wraps his arm around my waist as we head for the house. Flicking an annoyed glance over my shoulder, I sigh. He leans closer, his lips brushing my ear.
“After what you pulled last night, I’m done playing nice, Tate. You and I are going to work this out but I’m not your damn punching bag anymore.”
Damn, why does that turn me on?
“We’ll see,” I murmur and his grip on my hip tightens.
“You’re just going to have to come to terms with the fact that I fucking love you and I’m not going anywhere.”
“Tate!” the brunette from the clubhouse says as she comes walking out of the house and I freeze. “Sorry. I never introduced myself the other day. I’m Emma, Nix’s wife.”
“Oh, it’s really nice to meet you.” I hold my hand out for her to shake but she ignores it, going in for a hug.
“It’s so nice to meet you officially. I know this whole situation is… unorthodox but you’re family so if you ever need anything, just holler.”
I nod. “Okay, I will.”
“Here, why don’t you put your stuff down and I’ll introduce you to a few people,” she says and I scan the yard.
“Actually, I was hoping to talk to Nix first. There’s something I need to show him,” I reply, holding up the shoebox and she nods, turning toward the house.
“You’ll find him down at the dock. He wasn’t all that thrilled that I invited everyone over today with things so tense between him and Blaze.”
I nod in understanding. “Have they talked at all?”
“Blaze has showed up here everyday and they go outside and talk until they start yelling. Then, Nix barrels inside and Blaze peels out of here on his bike so tensions are still a little high.”
Nodding, I excuse myself from the group and round the back of the house, spotting Nix at the end of the dock. As I get near the water, he glances back at me.
“Sorry, I hope you don’t mind but I wanted to talk to you for a bit.”
He studies me for a moment before nodding. I sigh as I walk out onto the dock and sit next to him.
“What a fucking mess, huh?” he says, staring out at the water and I laugh.
“Yeah, you could say that. It’s been one thing after another lately.”
He nods, looking a little lost. “What was she like?”
“Our mom?”
“Yeah.”
I sigh, thinking over my words before explaining my childhood to him – the moving around, the drills, the training – and when I finish, he blows out a breath.
“Sounds…intense.”
I nod. “Yeah, it was but she did try to give us some normal. We used to have family game night and we went to the zoo in every city we stopped in when we were running.”
“There is so much shit I want to ask her and now I’ll never get the chance to,” he muses and I grab the shoebox.
“That’s why I brought this. Theo and I found it while we were cleaning out her stuff. There’s a photo of a little boy in here that I’m almost certain is you along with every report card you ever got.”
He glances over at me. “Can I see it?”
“Sure.” I hand it to him and he takes the lid off, setting it next to him on the dock. “Oh, there’s also love letters from your dad, I think.”
“You think?”
“Well.” I shrug. “They are only signed “M” and I don’t know his name but it seems fairly likely that they are from him.”
“His name is Malcolm,” he says, pulling out the photo and shaking his head. “This was my kindergarten picture.”
He starts going through the letters and report cards in the box and I sit next to him silently, only speaking to answer any of his questions. Finally, he sighs and sets the box down next to him.
“This is all fucking insane. I spent my whole life thinking my mom was a club whore that wasn’t capable of taking care of a kid and I was cool with that. I understood why she wasn’t around and now I find out it was all a lie.”
“If it makes you feel any better, I’m still learning new things about her all the time. Until we were in that room at the clubhouse, I had no idea who my dad was because she wouldn’t tell me. I didn’t know I had another brother. You and I are in the same boat so I’m always here if you want to talk.”
He glances over at me and smirks. “There is one question I want to ask you.”
“Go ahead,” I say with a nod.
“Is it true you shot Lincoln in the leg?”
I bark out a laugh and nod. “Um, yep. That’s true. Although to be fair, at the time, I thought he was some kind of psycho or something.”
“Naw, I heard the whole story from Fuzz. Seemed like he got what was comin’ to him.”
I smile and point over my shoulder. “I think Smith still has some extra “Team Tate” t-shirts if you want to show your support.”
“I just might do that,” he says, laughing as he turns back to the water. We sit in silence for a few seconds before he turns to the house. “We should probably get back in there. I’m sure Em will have food ready soon.”
He starts putting things back in the box and after setting the lid on top, he hands it to me. I shake my head.
“No, you should keep it.”
His brows furrow. “You sure?”
“Yeah. I’ve already read them all and she was your mom, too.”
He nods, placing his hand on top of the box as he sighs. “Thank you. I know I probably haven’t been handling any of this well but it’s pretty cool to finally have a brother and a sister.”
“I couldn’t agree more,” I tell him, smiling. “Our parents are super fucked up but Theo and I got you out of this whole thing and I’m grateful for that.”
He smiles and helps me up before we walk back up to the house together before he joins the guys and I step into the house in search of the girls. Ali, Carly, and Emma all glance up when I walk in.
“How’d your talk go?” Emma asks and I smile.
“Good. I think.”
“Nix is a straightforward guy. If you think it went well, then I’m sure it did.”
I nod, glancing out into the yard where the guys are gathered and Lincoln catches my eye. He laughs at something Smith says and my chest aches something fierce. I miss the way things were before I knew everything and there’s been so many times in the last week that I’ve wished I could go back.
“You know,” someone says, stepping up beside me and I turn as Ali flashes me a smile. “It’s okay to forgive him.”
/> “It’s not in my nature,” I tell her and she snorts out a laugh.
“Yeah, I’ve kind of picked up on that but you should try anyway. Lincoln is a good man – the kind that would never make this mistake again.”
I scoff, watching him as he raises the beer bottle to his lips. “He lied to me.”
“Oh, trust me, honey, I know. I already read him the riot act once for what he did to you but I also know he didn’t mean anything by it. He was torn in half by his loyalty to the club and his love for you – something that no one could have predicted.”
“He still should have told me the truth and he had so many chances to.”
Carly steps up on my other side and sighs. “It’s not that simple. This club – they’re a family – and he would take a bullet for any one of those guys just as they would take one for you simply because Kodiak loves you. That’s not an easy thing to betray and I’m sure that it haunted him everyday.”
“Both Carly and I,” Ali adds, “have been through some shit and the entire club stepped up for us without a moment’s hesitation. They’ve taken us both in as family and loving one of these men means that you won’t always know what’s going on but you have to trust him. He lies to you to keep you safe or to keep someone else safe.”
“Say he had told you the truth,” Emma says and we all turn to face her. “When he first met you, if he had spilled his guts, would you have ever let him into your life?”
I shake my head. “No, I don’t think I would have.”
She gives me a look that screams “exactly” and I sigh as I turn back to the window, wondering if I’ll ever be able to handle Lincoln lying to me regularly even if it was to save someone.
* * * *
“Tate, it’s not safe to be out here,” Lincoln growls, stepping out onto the screened in porch and I grab the pistol out of my lap, holding it up for him to see.
