by A. M. Myers
Blaze charges out of his office, his phone pressed to his ear, and we all turn in his direction as he lets out a piercing whistle. Chance turns the music down and we all look at each other, searching for answers. Blaze snaps his fingers in my direction. I set my beer down and stand up with a scowl as my heart jumps into my throat. What the hell is going on right now?
“Where are you at?”
Silence descends over the entire clubhouse as we all wait for information. My mind immediately goes to Kady before I shake it off. Kady is safe and sound at work which is why I came to the clubhouse to blow off a little steam. Things between us have not been good for the last couple days and I need time to think.
Blaze shakes his head. “Absolutely not. Under no circumstances should you stop, you understand me?”
I glance over at Smith and Chance, who look just as fucking jumpy and confused as I feel. Every man in the room is ready to leap into action as soon as Blaze gives the word but for now, we’re just stuck in this suspended state.
“Have your friend drive you to the cabin and we’ll be waiting there for you, okay?”
Wait…cabin?
As in…
Fuck.
“Kady!” I yell, charging across the room but she hangs up before I can get to Blaze. He offers me a brief sympathetic look before he turns to everyone else.
“Kady and her friend are being followed by a black SUV so let’s go now. We have to get to the cabin before they do.”
What the fuck?
My first thought is why didn’t she call me when she was in trouble? I mean, I know things haven’t been good between us these past few days but I’m still here for her, here to protect her.
“Henn!” Blaze yells and I turn as everyone runs out to their bikes.
Right.
I follow behind them, my mind racing and worry eating away at me as I climb on the back of my bike and the engine fires to life.
Why didn’t she call me?
Has she really lost all faith in me, in my ability to keep her safe? The thought makes me sick. I can’t lose her but each day that passes, she feels farther and father away from me and I have no clue how to pull her back in. I understand that what she’s been through has to be hard on her and I know there’s a little part of her that blames me but we can find a way around this, can’t we? Shaking off those thoughts, I turn to Blaze and nod. I can’t afford to be distracted right now. My girl needs me.
We ride out of the clubhouse in a line, Blaze in front followed by Storm and Smith before the rest of us and the roar of the bikes drowning out everything else around us. As we head out of town, I’m thankful that we live so close to the clubhouse. Then again, Hannah and Kady were probably coming from the clinic and it’s really not far either. If Kady and whoever is following her get to the cabin before us…
I can’t even picture it.
The rest of the ride is a blur and my heart is hammering in my chest as we pull up to the cabin. Hannah’s car is sitting in the driveway, still running, and they both appear to still be in the car. The SUV is parked along the dirt road leading up to Kady’s house and I jump off my bike, not even caring if I scratch the damn thing as I march over to the SUV and rip the driver’s side door open.
“Henn!” Blaze yells from behind me but I ignore him, intent on releasing some of this damn rage I’ve been carrying around for the past few days.
“Noah!” Kady screams and I glance back at her long enough for the man to jump out of the SUV and land a punch to my jaw. Smith, Chance, and Moose all jump in, grabbing him for me as I turn to look up at my girl. Tears are streaming down her face and it kills me but I can’t deal with that now.
“Take her inside, Hannah,” I instruct, turning back to the object of my anger. He smiles at me.
“Biche wanted to make sure y’all got your gift.”
I can’t hold back anymore as I clench my fist and slam it into his stomach. The satisfying wheeze of him trying to catch his breath again does nothing to quench the fire licking at my soul so I do it again.
And again.
And again.
And again before landing one to his jaw. In a haze, I keep punching until exhaustion takes over and I stumble back. The man in front of me is a bloody mess and barely conscious as I step forward and grab him by the collar of his shirt.
“You tell Biche that I’m coming for him,” I snarl, my face inches from his. “You tell him that when I’m done with him, he’s going to pray for death. I’m going to make him pay for everything he took from me and when that’s all said and done, I’m going to make him watch as I marry Kady and make her mine for the rest of eternity.”
I study his face for a second.
“You got all that? You need me to write it down?”
He shakes his head and I release him, letting his body slump to the ground as I back away, tears stinging my eyes as I struggle to breathe.
Fuck.
“Chance and Storm, tie him up and take him somewhere in town. I want him far away from here,” Blaze instructs and they nod before getting to work. He turns to me. “Go inside and see your girl, Henn. We’ve got this.”
I nod and turn toward the cabin, my stomach rolling.
Shit.
Now I’ve got to deal with this.
Kady is sitting on the couch next to Hannah when I walk in, her entire body shaking and I stop in the entryway as we stare at each other, neither one of us sure what to say. That’s never happened to us before. We’ve always been able to talk to each other and I hate the way it burns through me to know that’s changed.
“Why didn’t you call me?” I ask, my voice sounding far more accusatory than I intended and she sucks in a breath as her gaze hardens and she stands.
“Go to hell, Noah.”
She stalks past me and I reach out, grabbing her hand to stop her. “Where the hell do you think you’re going?”
“Let me go,” she whispers, fury in her tone as she rips her hand out of mine with so much force that I have to take a step back to catch myself. She takes off down the hallway and I take a step to follow her when Hannah steps out in front of me and plants her hand on my chest. She’s just as angry as Kady, visions of murder playing out across her face.
“You’d better pull your goddamn head out of your ass before you lose her, Noah… for good this time.”
She follows Kady down the hallway and I stand in the entryway like an idiot because I have no clue what to do in this situation. Obviously, Kady and I got off the rails somewhere along the way but I have no idea how to fix it.
Do I talk to her?
Do I leave her alone?
Finally, I decide to try and talk to her so I walk down the hallway and lean against the door frame as Kady throws clothes into a bag. My heart stops.
“Going somewhere?”
She glances up, anger warring with the pain in her eyes. “Yes. I’m spending the night at Hannah’s.”
“Don’t you think we should talk? Try and work this out?”
“I’m beginning to wonder if we even can,” she admits, tears filling her eyes as pain pierces through me.
“Please don’t say that, baby.”
Throwing her hands up, she tosses the bag on the bed. “I don’t know what else to do. You won’t talk to me, Noah. We’ve always been able to talk to each other but ever since I told you about Thomas, you’ve shut down on me.”
“Maybe you guys just need to take a breather,” Hannah suggests, all the anger gone from her expression. Kady sighs and meets my gaze.
“I think that’s a good idea.”
I shake my head. “Please, Kady. Don’t leave tonight. Stay here and we’ll work this out.”
“No,” she whispers, dropping her gaze to the floor and my stomach feels like a goddamn rock. “I think we need a little bit of space. I’ll be back tomorrow.”
I can’t even speak as she picks up her bag and walks across the room. With me in the doorway, she can’t get past me and I open my mou
th to object again when she gives me a pleading look. Sighing, I move so she can step past me and she reaches out, grabbing my hand and giving it a squeeze before she disappears into the living room with Hannah on her heels. It’s almost like she was saying good-bye and I press my fist to my chest as it tightens.
Fuck.
Is it already too late?
Have I already lost her?
Chapter Seventeen
Kady
“Good luck,” Hannah says, flashing me a sympathetic smile as I stare up at the front door of the cabin and suck in a breath. I haven’t spoken to Noah since I left with Hannah yesterday despite all the texts he sent me during the night, begging me to come back. If I could, I might just stay away forever but I know he and I need to talk. Too bad I have no idea what I’m going to say.
“Thanks, Han.”
She nods. “Of course. Text me if you need anything, okay?”
“‘Kay.”
“And remember to take a breath and just be honest with him. You two love each other and I know you can work this out if you both give it a shot.”
I smile at her and reach across the center console to hug her. “What the hell would I do without you?”
“Oh, believe me, I’ve been asking myself that question for twenty plus years.”
“Love you,” I say as I release her and reach for the door handle, opening it.
“Love you, too.”
Climbing out of the car, I shut the door and wave to her before walking up to the porch and turning to watch as she backs out of the driveway. I’m stalling a little bit but who could blame me? Now that I’m here, seconds away from coming face-to-face with Noah again after yesterday, my heart is thundering in my chest and my stomach is churning. God, what if he and I can’t get through this? Could I really survive losing him again? We were so young when we got together and in the seven years we’ve been apart, we’ve both changed so much that we may be completely incompatible now. Just the thought makes it hard to breathe, though.
Noah has always been my forever.
What would I do if he wasn’t anymore?
Sucking in a breath, I turn and walk into the house as my pulse pounds in my ears. Jack jumps up from his bed and runs across the room to me, wagging his tail so hard I don’t know how he stays upright. I smile as I bend down to pet him.
“Hi, Jackie. Did you miss me?”
“He did,” Noah says and I glance up as he leans against the hall leading into the hallway. “Walked around the house and cried half the night.”
I stand up and cross my arms over my chest. “Hi… we, uh… we should talk.”
“It’ll have to wait. Streak called us into the clubhouse. Seems like he’s found something on Biche.”
“Oh,” I breathe. “Yeah, okay.”
We stare at each other for a second, the awkwardness suffocating before he sighs and closes the distance between us. He pulls me into his arms and his body sags in relief as he presses his lips to my forehead.
“We’ll talk later, baby. I promise.”
I nod, clutching the back of his t-shirt like I can somehow keep him from drifting away. “Okay.”
He releases me and scoops his keys off the desk before ushering me outside to the truck. Just like the night of the party at the clubhouse, we ride in silence on opposite sides of the cab. I fight back tears, wondering what is going to happen when we finally do get a chance to talk, how we’ll make it through this, and what Streak has to tell us. It’s all too much - a shit show of worry and pain just swirling around inside me. It makes me miss when my life was simpler. Yeah, I didn’t have Noah and I was hiding from Oliver, worried that every day would be the day he found me but right now, it feels better than the uncertainty of our relationship. I allowed myself to love him again and I don’t know what I would do if I lost him now.
“You okay?” he asks as we pull into the clubhouse parking lot. “Nervous?”
I nod. “Yeah.”
“It’ll be all right, baby.” He pulls into a parking space and parks the truck before grabbing my hand. “We’ll get through this. Together.”
I meet his gaze and nod, tears burning my eyes. “I love you, Noah.”
He releases a breath and kisses the back of my hand as his brows furrow, his pain mirroring mine but he still doesn’t say the words and it kills me. Is he really so angry that he can’t tell me he loves me? Or does knowing the truth change the way he thinks of me, the way he sees me?
“Let’s get in there,” he whispers as he releases my hand. I bite my lip to hold back the tears as he opens his door and jumps out. When I’m certain that I can hold it together, I get out and meet him at the back of the truck. He slips his arm around my waist and leads me into the clubhouse. Blaze glances up from the bar as we walk in and sets his beer down before coming over to us.
“Streak’s waiting in the war room. Follow me.”
Noah nods and Blaze turns away from us. We follow him back to a long room that I’ve never been in before with a huge conference table in the middle. Streak is sitting on the far side and he nods at us when we walk in.
“What the fuck is going on?” Noah asks, his gaze bouncing between Streak and Blaze, who sighs and motions to two chairs across from Streak.
“Have a seat, guys.”
I peek up at Noah and he shakes his head as he pulls a chair out for me. As soon as we’re seated, Streak clears his throat.
“As you know, I’ve been digging into Biche’s life…”
“You have?” I ask as Noah nods and my eyes widen.
Jesus, what else do I not know about?
How much has he been keeping from me?
“After learning about the baby, I started thinking about what Biche would have done. He didn’t really have many options and although he’s a a bastard, I couldn’t see him killing a baby.”
My brows furrow as I turn to look at Noah again, trying to understand what’s going on. He flicks his gaze to me for just a second, guilt written all over his features, before looking back to Streak.
“Hold the fuck on. What is going on here? Are we talking about our baby, Thomas?”
Streak nods, sparing an annoyed glance in Noah’s direction. “You didn’t know?”
“Obviously not.”
“Noah came to us after learning what happened to you seven years ago,” Blaze adds with a sigh. “And after finding out about the baby, Streak started looking into Biche, searching for anything that could help us.”
I nod, somewhat following along. “And we’re talking about him killing a baby, because?”
“Let me ask you something,” Streak says. “Did you ever actually see your baby after Biche claimed that he had died?”
“I…” My mouth hangs open as memories from that night come back to me and I realize that I didn’t. I was in so much pain when he told me that Thomas was gone that I didn’t even question it. “I didn’t.”
He nods. “That’s what I’m saying. We’re left with three options - one, the baby really did die. Two, Biche killed the baby himself.”
I struggle to breathe through the sudden tears in my eyes as I stare at him. He’s right - Oliver is a sick bastard but killing a baby… could he really do that? I don’t know.
“Or, the baby didn’t really die at all.”
Noah slams his fist on the table. “If he didn’t die, then where is he?”
“That was the same question I asked myself,” Streak says, wagging a finger like we’ve just cracked some secret code. “Which led me to this…”
He slides a folder across the table and I grab it before Noah can, flipping it open. The photo pinned to the first page makes me gasp and I glance up at them as tears slip down my cheeks.
“Streak, what am I looking at?”
“Your son,” Blaze answers, his voice soft and I shake my head as I stare down at the picture again. He’s the spitting image of Noah - dark hair, green eyes, dimples, and the cutest little gap in his smile where he’s missing a tooth
. It’s the most beautiful thing I think I’ve ever seen.
“How did this happen?” Noah asks and I nod, desperately needing that answer as well as I glance up at them again.
“When you told me that Thomas was born almost exactly seven years ago, I started searching. On January thirty-first, two thousand twelve, a baby was left outside a fire station one mile from Biche’s house. The same house that someone pulled permits to build a basement apartment in two years prior.”
I clamp my hand over my mouth. “Oh, God.”
He just left him outside a fire station?
I imagine my baby boy, scared and out in the cold until someone found him and my stomach heaves. He was left outside of a fire station, just like I was - something Oliver knew. He’s a fucking monster.
“Where is he?” Noah asks, pulling the file out of my hand. “Where is our son?”
“Your son was placed in foster care…”
“No,” I sob, shaking my head as my heart squeezes. The biggest factor is my desire for a big family was growing up in foster care and knowing that my son ended up in the same place feels like someone is shredding me from the inside out. The pain is unbearable. Noah wraps his arm around me and pulls me into his side.
“He was only there for three months before he was adopted by a family in Port Allen. Their names are Kelly and TJ Olsen,” Streak says, his voice full of sympathy. I bury my head in Noah’s neck, unable to hold the tears back as my mind races over how fucked up everything is. Losing Thomas was one thing but knowing he’s been out there this whole time, less than thirty miles from me, is a whole new kind of pain that I don’t know how to handle.
“I’m so sorry, you two,” Blaze offers and I feel Noah nod as his hand slips into my hair and he massages the back of my head. “If there’s anything we can do, please let us know.”
“You got an address?” Noah asks.
“Yeah. It’s in the file.”
Noah nods and grabs the file as he stands up and holds his hand out for me to grab. I peek up at him, sniffling as I wipe the tears from my face. “Where are we going?”
“To see our son.”
My heart jumps into my throat as I stand up and glance around the room before nodding. More than anything else in this world, I want to see my baby boy. He reaches for my hand and laces our fingers together before nodding to Blaze and Streak.
