Angel's Halo: Forever Angel

by Terri Anne Browning

  Tears poured from my eyes, but I rushed to reassure him. “No, Tanner,” I choked out. “You’re not dead. I’m here.”

  He lifted his hand slowly, as if he wanted to touch me. I had to swallow my gasp when I saw he was missing a finger, and the tears only fell harder. I caught his hand, brought it to my face, letting him feel that I was real.

  “Even when you cry, you’re beautiful,” he mumbled before his eyes closed again, and he let out a harsh groan.

  “Why the fuck aren’t you doing this in an operating room with him knocked out?” Hawk demanded from where he was still standing by the door.

  “Because he wouldn’t survive going under,” the doctor told him calmly, but now I could see the sweat soaking through his scrubs and the surgical gown. It was beaded thickly on his brow. His voice and hands were steady, but this was getting to him just as much as the rest of us. “Your friend here has a mean burn on his back that’s scarred up pretty thickly, and it makes it hard to numb him. Any idea where that came from?”

  “My guess?” Matt’s voice was little more than a feral growl behind me. “The bomb we thought killed him must have scorched his back.”

  The doctor made a noncommittal sound, continuing his task. Every time Tanner groaned, my heart rate jumped and I tightened my fingers around his, fighting back the whimpers of distress for him.

  “Try talking to him some more,” the doctor urged. “It might distract him from what I’m doing.”

  I turned my head, wiping my nose on my shirt before leaning in closer to Tanner. “This probably isn’t the best time to yell at you, but you never seemed to hear me unless I was shouting.” I stroked his beard with my free hand, scratching through the tangled tufts. “How the hell did you get in this mess? Huh?”

  His eyes cracked open again, a pained smile lifting his lips slightly, making blood bead on them anew. I wiped it away with my thumb. “I’m always gettin’ into trouble, baby. Whaddya talkin’ ’bout?”

  Matt placed a cool, damp cloth in my hand, and I used it to wipe across Tanner’s lips. “You’re going to have to calm that down now, mister,” I scolded gently. “Your son needs you around too much for you to keep up the troublemaking like this.”

  His eyes drifted shut. “Whatever you say, Jos. Just sit there and touch me, ’kay?”

  “When you’re better, I’ll bring him to see you,” I told him as I kept stroking his face with the damp cloth, wiping away dirt and blood. “He looks just like you. I may have stirred up some trouble when I got to the clubhouse the other day. Rory doesn’t like me all that much because of it.”

  “Rory?” he said with a pained grunt. “Where’s Matt?”

  “Right here, brother.” Tanner’s eyes opened enough so he could see the man standing behind me.

  “Where’s Rory?” he asked, sounding weak.

  “Back at the clubhouse. She’s okay. Don’t worry about her.”

  “She not treating Jos okay?”

  Matt sighed. “They’re not fighting. Just avoiding each other. Your kid kind of took us all by surprise, man.”

  “There’s that word again,” he mumbled. “This is the most fucked-up dream I’ve ever had.”

  Chapter 5

  Jos

  It took another hour before the doctor was finally finished cutting away all the decayed flesh on Tanner’s back. No sooner were the nurses cleaning up, than the ICU team was there to take him upstairs.

  All three nurses appeared to be in their late thirties, early forties. They each had their hair neatly pulled back from their faces. Two of the three didn’t even blink when they saw Tanner’s state, letting me know they must have seen some crazy medical shit over the years. The third one took one look at Tanner and blanched, but she also seemed to be the one in charge.

  Feeling his bed moving, he clutched at me with his four-fingered hand. “Don’t leave me,” he whispered. “Every time I open my eyes somewhere new, you’re gone.”

  I leaned over him, kissing his cheek. “I’m not going anywhere,” I promised.

  The nurse in charge made a disapproving sound and started to say something, but the ER doctor pulled her aside, whispering something to her. Her eyes scanned over me disdainfully, taking in my pajama pants and long-sleeved sleep shirt. Both had holes and stains on them thanks to my son, but at least I had on a bra.

  With a twist of her lips, the nurse gave him a nod and didn’t protest when I walked with them out of the room and down the hall to the elevators.

  “Jos!” Tanner shouted weakly, only to groan in pain.

  I bent in the cramped space of the crowded elevator so we were on an even eye level, my hand skimming over his shaggy, dirty hair. “I’m right here. Shh, shh. I’m right beside you.”

  He blew out an exhausted breath. “You’re so pretty.”

  I lifted my lips in a halfhearted smile. “Only pretty? You called me beautiful earlier.”

  “Beautiful. Pretty. Gorgeous. The sexiest female I’ve ever seen in my entire life.” He seemed to lean into my hand, wanting more of my touch. I didn’t know what to make of what he was saying. Tanner Reid wasn’t one to go around tossing out compliments on a woman’s beauty unless it was about how nice her tits were.

  Seconds later, the elevator stopped, and the three nurses pushed the bed forward. I followed behind them, while Tanner kept calling my name. I rushed to keep up, following them straight into the ICU ward and to the room directly across from the nurses station. The three women worked quickly, getting him hooked up to everything again, checking both IV sites, confirming all his information through me since he wasn’t in the right frame of mind to answer for himself.

  Once he was finally sorted, two of the three left, and Tanner was starting to struggle on his bed.

  “Jos,” he growled. “Where the fuck did you go?”

  I leaned over him, kissing his brow. “I’m here. Stop moving around so much. You need to save your energy.”

  He blew out a relieved exhale, his four-fingered hand tucking mine against his heart. “Stop fussin’. Ain’t no need, baby. Gonna die soon.”

  I couldn’t hold back my whimper. “Don’t say that,” I whispered fiercely. “You’re not going to die. Do you hear me? I won’t let you.”

  His smile told me how tired he was, how much pain he was really in. “Always liked it when you got all bossy. Even when you were just a little girl, you threw out orders like you owned the world.”

  “My grandpa was your boss. Of course, I got to order you around,” I reminded him. “I guess I’m your boss for real now.” At least that was what Grandpa always said. When he passed, I would take over the construction company he’d spent his entire life building up. Dad didn’t want to run it, had never shown any interest in the business side of Barker Construction.

  Tanner’s brow puckered in confusion, but he didn’t comment.

  “Ma’am, I let you stay so we could get him comfortable, but there are rules here in the ICU ward. I need you to go now until visiting hours.”

  I glanced up at the nurse. “Why? I’m not causing any trouble. He’s more comfortable when I’m close to him. Isn’t that more important?”

  She pressed her lips together, that disdainful look returning tenfold, and I felt insulted just from the way her eyes kept going to the spaghetti sauce stain on my left boob. I refused to fold my arms over my chest to hide it. “He needs to rest. That is what is most important right now. This is a quiet floor, with limited outside contact to help the patients recharge. You will only hinder not just Mr. Reid’s recovery, but also that of my other patients.”

  I wanted to punch her in the face for the snide way she was talking to me, but I didn’t want them to kick me out of the hospital—or worse, arrest me.

  Kissing Tanner’s brow again, I straightened, but he didn’t release my hand. “Where you goin’?” he demanded, his voice slurred. “You said you’d stay with me.”

  “I’m not going far. Just out into
the waiting room. You need to sleep,” I tried to explain. “I’ll be back as soon as visiting hours start.”

  His fingers clutched at me, the stitches on the nail beds catching my attention. Would his fingernails ever grow back? I kissed the back of his hand, fighting tears.

  “Don’t go,” he pleaded raggedly. “It’s dark when you’re not with me.”

  Twin tears fell over my lashes and onto the gown the nurses in the ER had dressed him in earlier, once his back had been bandaged. “I’m sorry, Tanner.”

  I tried to pry my hand free of his grasp, but he had surprising strength even in his weakened condition. “Don’t go. Don’t leave me here.”

  “I’m not,” I soothed when his heart monitor started going crazy. “Baby, I’m not. I swear. I’ll be right outside.”

  “No. Fuck that.” His eyes were wild, and I ached to give in. “I want you here. Beside me.”

  The nurse grasped my elbow, pulling me backward roughly, and suddenly I was in the middle of a game of tug-of-war with me as the rope. I twisted my arm, pushing the nurse off me. “Don’t you ever fucking touch me again, bitch.” I grabbed her scrubs top and pulled her in close now that I was free, getting in her face. “I might look sweet and malleable, but you put your hands on me a second time, and you will become a patient in this ward.”

  The woman paled, but she didn’t lose that “I’m better than you” expression on her face. “If you don’t leave now, I’ll call security, and you won’t be allowed back.”

  “Jos!” Tanner roared when I started to tug my hand free again. His heart monitor was screaming now.

  My mind made up, I leaned over him, stroking his brow as I tried to soothe him. “I’m right here. Shh, shh. I’m here.”

  Muttering under her breath, the nurse left the room in a hurry, no doubt to call security on me. They could try to kick me out, but I wasn’t going anywhere. Not when his heart did scary things when he thought I was leaving him.

  Fuck them and their rules. All I cared about was taking care of Tanner.

  Slowly, his heart rate lowered, and I sat on the edge of his bed, stroking his face, murmuring softly to him.

  His eyes were just starting to drift shut again when the nurse returned with two men in security uniforms. I eyed them both. Lean, lazy-looking. The scariest thing about them was probably the Tasers attached to their belts.

  Even as small as I was, I was fairly sure I could take them both if I needed to. I worked two jobs to take care of Reid. One of them was as a bartender at a club a few blocks from my apartment in Oakland.

  I dealt with guys six evenings a week, and they tended to get handsy a lot. Especially when they were drinking. Sometimes, I had to show them who was boss when they thought they could order more than just beer or shots from me.

  “Ma’am, we’re going to have to ask you to leave,” the one on my left said. He was the nicer-looking of the two, with short, dark hair and brown eyes.

  Beside him, his partner, a blond with a snarl on his face much like the nurse’s, shifted as if he thought he was going to have to take me down.

  I smiled sweetly up at the dark-haired security officer. “I would like to speak to your administrator in regard to filing a complaint against the nurse beside you.”

  His eyes narrowed, as if he thought I was only trying to start trouble, and my smile turned sweeter.

  Oh, honey. You haven’t seen trouble yet.

  “Ma’am—”

  “She put her hands on me and tried to physically pull me out of this room. Now, I don’t work in the medical field, but I’m pretty sure no one is allowed to touch me unless I’m causing trouble. As you can see, she’s considerably larger than me.” I let my eyes skim over the nurse, who had a good thirty pounds on me. I wouldn’t ever judge another person by their weight, and she wasn’t fat by anyone’s definition, but she’d pissed me off. “I don’t think I’m much of a threat to her.”

  “Ma’am,” the blond officer bit out. “I’m going to give you to the count of five before I pull my Taser. You’re causing a disturbance on the ICU floor. I don’t want to have to drag you out of here by force, but I will if you don’t start listening.”

  “Yeah, no, that isn’t happening. I want to speak to Tanner’s doctor and the administrator before I even think about stepping outside this room.” I stood up, but the movement woke Tanner, and he grabbed my hand, his heart monitor making awful noises again.

  “Jos,” he whispered brokenly.

  I took his hand, but I kept my eyes on the three people in front of me. “I’m sure there is a waiting room full of big, scary men right now. All I have to do is scream, and they will all beat down those metal doors out there. Give me a reason to scream,” I told the blond, leaning my head closer. “I dare you.”

  He looked skeptical, but the dark-haired officer moved forward as if to intercept his partner’s next step in my direction. I met his gaze and nodded. “Smart man.”

  Shifting closer to Tanner’s bed so I could hold his hand easier, I turned my gaze back to the nurse. “Doctor. Administrator. You have ten minutes to get me what I want.”

  Chapter 6

  Tanner

  Jos’s hand was in mine, but her body was turned away from me. Two men and a woman I didn’t recognize stood before her, and from the tension coming off all four of them, I knew they were trying to take her away from me.

  The skinny blond guy shifted toward her threateningly, and every instinct inside of me screamed to protect what was mine. Every movement felt like it would be the one that finally ended me, but I sat straight up in bed and pulled Jos down across my legs, using the top half of my body to protect her, cradling her back with my busted-up arm that was in a splint.

  The woman shouted in surprise and rushed forward, but I lifted my head enough to glare at her, stopping her in her tracks. “Get…the…fuck…back!” I panted out, already seeing spots.

  Fuck.

  I was going to pass out on top of Jos. I couldn’t leave her alone and unprotected from these assholes.

  “Where’s Matt?” I gritted out to the beautiful woman on my lap.

  “He’s in the waiting room,” she assured me. “Tanner, please, lie back down. It’s okay. No one will hurt me.”

  “That one would have,” I nodded toward the blond security guard who was staring at me in open-mouthed terror. “Yeah, you little pussy-ass bastard. Get out of here. Go find my little brother.”

  “T-Tanner, your b-back.” The nurse was falling all over her words, but the way she said my name confused me. Like she knew me and was upset. My gaze raked over her again, but nothing about her rang any bells. “L-Let m-me—”

  “Jos will take care of me,” I snarled at her, and her face paled. “Get out of here.”

  The blond guard was backing out of the room, his face turning green. If I looked as bad as I felt, whatever he was seeing must have been turning his stomach.

  “Ma’am.” The other guard was trying to stay calm. “I think it’s best you get who the young lady was asking for. I’ll wait for the doctor and the administrator with the patient and his friend.”

  “O-Okay,” the woman continued to stutter as she backed out of the room, tears filling her eyes as her gaze stayed glued to me.

  As soon as she was gone, Jos grumbled something under her breath. I looked away from the only remaining person in the room long enough to look down at her. “What?”

  “I’m not even going to ask if you fucked her. She’s so your type.” Her lips pressed into a firm line, her eyes narrowed on me, and I found the strength to grin.

  “You jealous, baby?”

  Her jaw clenched, and she lowered her lashes so I couldn’t read what she was thinking. “Maybe,” she said so quietly I had to strain to hear her.

  “Don’t be.” The spots around my vision were getting worse, and I knew I was only seconds away from blacking out. “Jos,” I muttered, fighting the darkness. “Don’t…leave…m
e.”

  --

  The next time I lifted my eyelids, the room was dim. My heart started pounding as I glanced around for Jos.

  Seeing her slumped down in a chair, snoring softly, I let out a relieved breath. Her hair was in her face, her arms crossed over her chest like she was cold. I shifted in bed, wanting to cover her with the blanket that was on me, but even that small movement made my body protest.

  My involuntary groan was loud enough to wake her, and she sat up straight, pushing her hair back from her beautiful face. “What do you need?” she whispered as she stood and leaned over me. “Is the pain worse? Should I get the nurse?”

  I caught her hand in my right one and pulled it to my chest. “I’m good,” I lied, pretending I wasn’t in complete misery, and forced a smile to lips. “Want to lie down beside me and sleep?”

  “No way,” she said with a shake of her blond head. “That is your bed. You need your space and sleep. Your heart rate is starting to get better.”

  I scanned my eyes over the parts of her body I could see with her leaning over me like she was. The top she was wearing wasn’t the one I remembered, but at least it was long-sleeved like the other one. Even in the dim lighting, I could see a stain of some kind across her amazing tits.

  “You turn into a messy eater?” I teased, lifting my splinted arm so I could skim my fingers over one tit, my thumb playing with her nipple as I traced part of the stain with my index finger.

  She gasped and covered my hand, pushing it away. “Funny. Don’t start something you’re in no shape to finish.”

  Sighing, I pulled my hand away, only to grasp the back of her hair and tug her down closer. Her mouth fell open as I stopped her an inch from mine. “Just thinking about you makes me ready to prove you wrong, sweetheart.”

  Her lips pressed to mine, surprising me. But before I could kiss her back, she was pulling away and stepping back. “You’ve been in this ICU ward for five days, dummy. During that time, you’ve had some crazy-as-hell hallucinations and a fever that only broke yesterday. You died twice and had to be brought back. The doctors thought you wouldn’t even make it through the fucking night after that first code.” Tears spilled from her eyes, surprising me even more than the kiss. “When you get out of this fucking hospital, I’ll let you prove it as many times as you want. But until then, save all your energy and focus on getting back to the Tanner I remember.”