by Lina Langley
“Oh, I don’t think you have to worry about that. I don’t think you would have to do much cooking,” Simon said with a smile, his hand around the back of Dallas’ neck, his touch sending a shiver down Dallas’ spine. “It’d be nice to have a chef in the family, wouldn’t it?”
Simon’s parents glanced at each other for a second, so quickly that Dallas almost missed it. “Yes, indeed,” Philip said. “That would be nice.”
Dallas almost choked on his food, but managed to swallow it down instead, looking away from all of them. The rest of dinner passed by in a blur. All of Simon’s family were great conversationalists and the champagne was helping, too. By the time they were done talking, it was dark. Dallas couldn’t believe how much fun he’d had with these people, people he had assumed wouldn’t like him. By the end of dinner, both Tom and Sarah had asked for his number.
It was weird. In the best of ways, but still weird. Once they were done, Simon walked Dallas to the back door and smiled at him. “Would you mind waiting for me in my bedroom? There’s something I want to talk to my parents about.”
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” Simon said, winking at him. “Just royal business. Don’t worry about it. You can go around the house, anywhere you want. Just don’t go to the underground chamber.”
“What?”
“I’m fucking with you.”
“Oh.”
“But if you get lost, you can come out here and I’ll find you.”
“Am I going to get lost?”
“It’s a big palace,” Simon said, shrugging his shoulders. “I’ve still not discovered all of it.”
He leaned down, kissed him on the lips and smiled.
“Run along now,” Simon said. “I gotta go take care of some royal business.”
Dallas smiled as he watched him walk back to the dining room table. He turned back to the palace, walked through the double doors and took a deep breath.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Dallas took a shower and sat on the luxurious double bed. He took a deep breath and stretched out on the bed, closing his eyes. The last few days were all a blur. A wonderful, colorful blur, but a blur nevertheless. He still wasn’t sure how they were going to make it work in the long-term but he did want this. He wanted Simon for the rest of his life. Not just on a vacation.
The problem was that he wasn't sure that he wanted this life. He wasn’t sure if he could have Simon without having this life, though, and that scared him.
He had a lot of feelings when it came to Simon. He more than liked him, really, though he hadn’t said that to him yet. It felt like the moment that he told him that he loved him it would make things far too real and Dallas wasn’t going to be able to back away from Simon’s life then.
He kept him at a respectable distance, except when they were having sex—then, it felt like Simon touched every part of him, every raw nerve. It felt like Simon touched his soul, which was unnerving. The weirdest part of it all was that Dallas liked it.
He liked it a lot.
His body liked it, but he liked it too. It made him feel complete. He couldn’t work out how he could be with Simon for the long term but he couldn’t even contemplate the possibility that they weren’t going to be together. The very idea that they wouldn’t be made him queasy with worry. He told himself that he was being stupid, that he barely knew Simon.
He closed his eyes. He was trying to be practical, but of course he would have loved to live in a palace. What kind of person wouldn't like to live in a palace? But when he would think about leaving The Butterfly Inn behind, it made him a little sick to his stomach. It might have been his father’s idea to open up the inn, but after his father had died, it had slowly become Dallas’ happy place.
He hadn’t liked the inn at first, it had reminded him that his dad wasn’t there, that this wasn’t his dream. But over time, he had learned to love it, and while it was a lot of work, he missed it now. It was a good job and he didn't want to leave it behind. He didn’t want to leave Simon behind either though, and he couldn't think about which one he wanted to give up less. Leaving The Butterfly Inn behind felt like leaving part of his identity behind.
He wanted to be able to keep his job, his life. But he still wanted Simon, he wanted him more than he had ever wanted anyone else in his entire life. He wanted him more than he had ever known it was possible to want someone else. He was drifting off to sleep, coming to no solution. There was no compromise, no way that they could make this happen. Simon and Dallas were great together, but Simon the prince and Dallas The Butterfly Inn owner, that was a whole different thing.
He didn’t want to think about that, it upset him. He was stretching and yawning when he heard the door open. His eyes fluttered open as he set his gaze on Simon, who was coming in with a smile on his face, looking slightly dazed.
“Hey,” Simon said, looking at him. “Shit, did you fall asleep? Did I wake you?”
“No, should I have?”
“I don't know. You just look like you fell asleep.”
Dallas shook his head, wiping a trail of drool off his chin as surreptitiously as possible. “Nope,” he said. “Completely awake.”
“Okay,” Simon replied, winking at him. “Move along, I want to talk to you about something.”
“Okay,” Dallas said as he moved along the bed. Simon sat down next to him, putting his hand on top of Dallas. His hands were cold compared to Dallas’ own and his first instinct was to jerk away from him, but he didn’t. Their fingers interlaced, Dallas looked up at Simon. “What’s up? Everything okay?”
“Yes, everything's more than okay. I wanted to speak to my parents about you.”
Dallas swallowed, his mouth dry. “Oh, no. Did it get a rating?”
“No, not a rating, we don’t do that,” Simon said with a chuckle. “I did want their blessing for something.”
“Their blessing for what?” Dallas asked as he cocked his head.
Simon took a deep breath before he started talking. “Okay. I know this is a bit much, but I'm just going to tell you, okay? Please don’t freak out.”
Dallas watched him.
“Promise you won’t freak out.”
“I promise I’ll try not to freak out.”
“That’s… that’s better than nothing, I guess.”
“You’re stalling.”
“I know. It’s just, I see all this doubt in your eyes, and I don't think it's about me.”
Dallas blinked.
“I know it's kind of an assumption but I have a feeling it's more about the practicalities of our relationship. I like to think that you’re as into me as I am into you.”
Dallas nodded, his mouth dry. It was weird to think that Simon knew exactly what was going through his head, even though he had only spoken about it briefly. Simon took another deep breath and Dallas looked away from him, his eyes stinging with tears. He wasn't very excited to hear whatever else Simon had to say. Part of that was because he knew that there was no practical way that the two of them could be together. Dallas assumed that he had come to tell him that, after softening the blow by saying that his family found him lovely, because Simon’s family was very nice. That was a kind of thing that he would do, because Simon was a nice person, too.
Dallas knew that he would want him to walk away from this experience as happy as possible, and he thought that he might be trying to get him prepared for the inevitable breakup. It didn't matter what they had done up on the bridge, when Simon had tried to reassure him with his body, because ultimately this wasn't just about sex.
This was the reality of their lives, which were so very separate, so very disparate. Dallas had to watch his account like a hawk every time he went on a night out and Simon had people fetching him French pasties on the payroll. What was it that Simon had said, a prince and a pauper? That was right.
It was a fantasy and fantasies had to end.
“Dallas.”
“What?”
“Are you oka
y?”
“I'm fine, or I'll be fine. I just don't want this to end yet.”
“End? Why would you think it’s ending?”
“Isn't that what you came here to tell me?”
“No, not at all. I came here to tell you the exact opposite. But if you want it to end...”
Dallas let out a sigh of relief. “I don’t,” he said. “Want it to end, I mean. I just, I just don't know how to get it to work. And I don't want to tell you something that I know is only going to hurt you in the long run.”
Simon watched him. “Something like what?”
“I don’t want to tell you.”
“I want to hear it.”
“You know, like I love you,” Dallas quietly replied. Simon watched him, a smile on his face. Dallas could only see him from the corner of his eye, he didn’t want to turn to face him, didn’t want to look at him when he broke his heart.
“You love me?”
“That's what I just said, isn't it?”
“Yeah, I just thought...”
Dallas didn’t want to press him. This could still go wrong, he could still tell him that nothing else was going to happen once he went back home. That’s what he expected would happen, in any case. He didn't think that he would tell him that he loved him back, because Dallas knew that declaring his love for him right then was premature. Confessing how he felt about Simon had probably came too early in the relationship, but everything had happened so quickly, and every time that Dallas closed his eyes he would think about him. He might not have come to any practical solutions, but he didn't think love was necessarily practical. If he had to leave this, if he had to leave him behind, then Dallas would have to come to terms with that, but at least Simon would know that how he felt about him was real. That was more important to him than anything, so he smiled at Simon, a little sadly. “What?”
Simon exhaled. “I don’t know, I kind of expected you to break up with me.”
Dallas bit his lips. “I expected you to break up with me.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, you came in here and told me that you had an announcement, and then you sat down next to me…”
“And?”
“And I've been thinking about all this. I can't do this, Simon.”
“So I was right. You love me, but you’re breaking up with me.”
“This isn’t about you.”
“Then what is it about?”
Dallas shook his head, his eyes welling up with tears. “I can't just be your dad’s employee. Don't get me wrong, I think that your dad’s a very nice person. I'm just not cut out to be a royal.”
Simon watched him, his eyes narrow. “Good,” he said. “Neither am I.”
Dallas was horrified. He didn't even want to abandon his inn, he didn't want to think about what Simon would have to abandon to be with him. It seemed like the price was far too steep. He shook his head vigorously. “You can't abdicate the throne for me.”
Simon laughed.
Dallas narrowed his eyes. “What's funny?”
“You really don't know how this whole royalty thing works, do you?”
“I don't want you to give up something that you care about for me. You're always going to resent me for it and I don't like that idea. I want you to look at me and be happy, even if it’s not forever.”
“I am, that's the thing. With you around, I don't care about any of this,” Simon replied, gesturing in a way that Simon interpreted to mean he was talking about the palace. “When I’m with you, it doesn't feel like work, it feels like home. Ever since I met you, you have felt like home.”
“I know,” Dallas said, closing his eyes, tears streaming down his cheeks. “My physical home is a tiny inn in the middle of a bustling boardwalk in a city full of drunk tourists and not enough parking lots.”
“Can I just say that I love how sensitive you are?”
“You do?”
“Yeah,” Simon said. “I think it plays into how kind you are.”
“Thank you?”
Simon sighed. He leaned over and kissed Dallas on the lips, quickly, softly. He cupped Dallas’ face with the palm of his hand, leaning in and kissing him on the lips again. He started to speed up his kisses slowly, moving down slightly until he was kissing Dallas’ neck, sticking his tongue out to lick down his Adam’s apple.
“I love the way you look when you’re under me,” Simon said.
Dallas closed his eyes. “I’m always under you.”
“I love the way you always look then.”
He sped up his approach, moving his hand down to Dallas zipper. He fumbled with his buttons for a second, opening his jeans up and touching his cock through the fabric of his underwear. Dallas shuddered under his touch.
“You said you wanted to fuck me?”
Dallas gasped. “I want to do whatever to you. I'll top, I'll bottom, whatever.”
“What are you normally?”
Dallas shook his head as Simon yanked the waistband of his underwear down, revealing his hardened cock, and tracing his fingers up the underside of his cock, stopping to stroke his head. Every time that Simon touched him, Dallas already felt like he was about to come. He took a deep breath as Simon looked up at him again, stopping suddenly, his eyes gleaming. “Answer me when I talk to you.”
“Top, normally,” Dallas said, shuddering. They’d have this conversation before, he was sure of it, but it didn’t matter right then.
“Cute little twink like you?” Simon said as he took Dallas’ shirt off while Dallas held his arms above his head.
“For you, anything,” Dallas replied, throwing his head back. Simon moved his hands away from his cock, tracing the lines on his chest, tweaking his nipples, moving up to trace his collarbones and up his neck again until his finger was in Dallas’ mouth. Dallas wrapped his lips around it and started to suck.
“I want you to fuck me.”
Dallas groaned.
“Don’t stop,” Simon said. Dallas got busy sucking his fingers again as Simon stuck another one inside of his mouth, then another one, then another one. Dallas moved his head back and forth, as if he was working on his cock, the tears that had filled his eyes earlier streaming down his cheeks. “I want you to come inside of me and then I want you to suck it all up again.”
Dallas practically choked.
“Don’t stop.”
Dallas got back to work, moving his head back and forth on Simon’s bunched up fingers, tears still streaming down his face. His mouth was burning, his tongue was burning, and he wanted to reach out and touch Simon, but he knew better than that. He couldn’t touch him without asking for his permission—explicitly asking him, begging him really—something that had become clear as they had spent time together.
“Use your own hand,” Simon said. He moved down and slid Dallas’ jeans down his legs, throwing them on the floor somewhere. “I’m going to take mine out and you’re going to do the same thing with yours while you watch me undress, okay?”
Dallas didn’t say anything.
“Blink if you’re going to behave.”
Dallas took a deep breath through his nose, as deep as he could, which wasn’t much. His airways were blocked by Simon’s rough hand, and while his entire fist wasn’t in his mouth, it wasn’t too far off. There was a part of him that wanted to tell him to stop, that wanted to tell him that this was too much, that he couldn’t do this, but his balls were already tight, his cock was throbbing, and he liked the way he felt like this.
All raw pain and pleasure, like he was in his body and he wasn’t in his body all at once.
He closed his eyes, then opened them and stared right at Simon.
Simon smiled at him. “Are you ready? Blink again.”
Dallas didn’t hesitate this time. He blinked again and Simon took his hand out of his mouth. Slowly, slowly, so that he wouldn’t hurt him, Dallas thought. He grabbed Dallas’ hand and brought it up to his face. Dallas bunched up his fingers, took a deep breath and put the
m all in his mouth. It wasn’t at all like when he was sucking Simon’s fingers, which tasted sweet and salty at the same time, his skin burning every time he touched them with his tongue.
His gag reflex clicked in a lot more when he was doing this himself, but Simon was watching him, and Dallas didn’t dare stop. He didn’t want to stop, he wanted to keep doing this forever. It wasn’t that it was particularly hot to be sucking on his own fist, it wasn’t, but the way that Simon was looking at him was almost enough to make him come.
Simon started to unbutton his dark blue shirt, slowly letting it slide down his arms as he finally got to the bottom, showing off the gorgeous lines on his stomach and his chest. Dallas kept watching him, groaning into his own mouth, as Simon undid his zipper and moved them down his legs. Dallas could see the outline of his cock in his black boxers from where he was. Simon was incredibly hard, almost as hard as Dallas himself. His cock was huge and it made Dallas’ mouth water. He stopped for a second, because he liked watching Simon liked this, he liked to watch him get undressed, but Simon shook his head. “Don't stop.”
Dallas didn't. He kept going because Simon had stopped undressing himself, until Simon was completely naked in front of him. It was the first time that he had ever seen him naked, properly naked, and he was stunning. If he hadn’t been busy doing what he was doing, Dallas might have actually gasped.
“Take your fingers out of your mouth,” Simon said. He walked over to his closet, which was on the other side of the room, and leaned down as he looked for something, his ass up in the air. Dallas held on to the sheets under him tightly, leaving marks on them, leaving marks on his own fingers.
Simon brought a little bottle of lube with him and a condom and set them down next to Dallas. “Get me ready.”
Dallas nodded, spreading some of the lube on his sticky wet fingers. Simon moved so that he was right in front of him, then slowly sat down and hovered over Dallas’ lap as Dallas tentatively stroked his ass cheeks. He moved a lubed-up finger down his crack and slowly pressed it into his soft, yielding ass.
“More,” Simon said with a groan.
Dallas swallowed and moaned as he pressed another finger into Simon’s crevice, each time eliciting another moan from him, until almost the entirety of his hand was inside of him and Simon was rocking his hips back and forth on top of him as Dallas thrusted himself into him.
