Blue Love : Blue Valley High — Senior Year

by Mj Fields

  When Lucas returns, he squats in front of me. “Drink this and listen up. I didn’t call you a bitch at the park. I said not to act like one. I trusted you with my deepest, darkest secret and expected you to keep that secret. Now, I’m not a Sadi fan, Tessa, but that was mean. Cruel, actually. I have watched you for over two weeks. Admired the hell out of how you treat the people you love. The girls on your team all look up to you. Your softness and some of that sass is what drives me crazy about you. I didn’t see that tonight. I know you’re hurting, and I’m sorry I can’t fix it for you, but don’t ever slap me across the face again. Got it?”

  “You called me a bitch in the car,” I whisper.

  “You were way out of line.”

  “Don’t call me that again, even if I deserve it. Got it?”

  He stuck out his hand to shake. “Deal?”

  “Deal.” I try to smile, but even my face knows better.

  “You ready to see your brother yet?”

  “No,” I snap.

  He sits next to me and pulls me against him. One arm wrapped around me, he uses the other hand to gently pull my head to his shoulder. “Talk to me, Tessa Ross.”

  “I don’t dare say a thing, because if I do, and you get mad, or worse, reject me again, then—”

  “I wanted to do everything you asked me to tonight, Tessa. You get those thoughts out of your head, the ones of me not wanting you, and get pissed. You get to the point your cheeks are burning with embarrassment thinking I want you any less, I’m telling you don’t even go there, because you have no idea the thoughts I have about what I want to do to you every night—hell, even in my dreams. And let’s not leave out the morning shower. Your tits are beautiful. Perfect, actually. It just wasn’t right. I don’t want to have sloppy drunk sex with you, not for your first time.” He kisses my head.

  “Well, I wasn’t asking for sex. I was asking you to … Well, you know what I asked.”

  “Not when you’re drunk, Tessa. Only when you’re sober and very alert, and not for a long time.” He lifts my chin so I’m looking at him. Even in the dark, I see his eyes are soft. “Drunk women are good for one thing. You are better than that, and I want no regrets with you.” He kisses me softly on the lips. “Now rest.”

  Squinting, I awake in a field, in a sleeping bag, and in his arms. The minute I lift my head, I feel like it’s going to explode. I have no idea how I even got here.

  I deserve this, I think as I sit up.

  “How are you feeling, baby?”

  “Like an elephant stepped on my head,” I groan.

  “I guess you drank too much, huh?” Lucas slides out of the sleeping bag, stands up, and extends his hand.

  “What happened? I mean, I remember drinking and seeing my mom, but the rest is a blur.”

  “You really want to know?”

  The dawn starts to break and, let me tell you, it’s no friend of mine.

  “Ouch. I need to sit.”

  “Maybe you should ask your brother. He knows everything.” Lucas chuckles.

  I sit back down as bits and pieces come back, and then I hold my head. “Or maybe you should just tell me.”

  After Lucas recaps last night’s events, not seeming pissed off in the least, I ask, “Are we okay?”

  “We”—his green eyes sparkle as bright as the sun, and that doesn’t hurt my head at all—“are fine. Growing pains. We’ll figure it all out.”

  “Lucas?”

  He smiles as if to ask what.

  I shake my head. “Never mind.”

  He leans in and whispers, “Your face gets pink when you’re thinking naughty thoughts. So, whatever you’re questioning, don’t. And baby, I can’t wait to meet the girls on a more personal level.”

  It hurts to smile, but it can’t be helped, especially since he totally just read my mind.

  “You ready to talk to your brother?”

  “No. No, I’m not.”

  As soon as Lucas gave me the recap, I remembered everything, and I especially remembered that I’m pissed at Alex. I can’t even look at him, let alone answer his annoying questions. But I’m also not going to fight with him, because it’s still early enough that Dad’s still in bed. And at least I can get some sleep before Alex tells Dad.

  I jump out of the truck, run into the house, up to my room, where Kendall is asleep, and slip into bed.

  When I wake up, I need to use the bathroom.

  Walking downstairs and into the living room, Alex and Dad are sitting on the couch.

  “Stomach bug?” Dad asks as I walk past him.

  “Uh-huh.”

  After eating some toast, I decide to soak in the bath, and to avoid Dad and Alex, I stay soaking until the water grows too cold.

  When I walk out of the bathroom, wrapped in a robe, I stick my nose in the air and head upstairs, completely ignoring the fact that Mom has now joined Alex and Dad in the living room.

  “Tessa, we need to talk,” Mom calls after me.

  The cordless phone, that was, in fact, by my side all the times, rings as I’m throwing on a pair of jogging pants.

  “Hello.”

  “Hey, baby. How are you feeling?”

  “Better. You?”

  “Missing you.”

  I smile.

  “You feel up to meeting my mom? She’d like to meet you and barbeque.”

  “What?”

  “I’ve met yours, now it’s time you meet mine.”

  “Well, mine is here right now, waiting for me to get dressed”—I pull a shirt over my head—“so we can talk.”

  “So, the girls are free right now?”

  “The girl …” I stop immediately, and he laughs.

  “You blushing?”

  “Maybe?”

  “Get through your talk, and I’ll see you at five.”

  “Lucas …”

  “Bring swim wear. And don’t overthink this.”

  “I’m probably grounded for life.”

  “You’re not. See you soon.” He hangs up.

  Head held high, I sit down in a chair opposite the couch, where Dad and Mom are sitting. Alex in the middle. It does not go unnoticed that she looks extremely uncomfortable.

  “Talk.”

  “I have been on one date with the man you saw me with last night.”

  Dad interrupts, “But has had lunch with him twice at the hospital.”

  Mom sighs. “Obviously, your father knows everything about it. I don’t feel it’s something that you should be concerned about.”

  Before I lose my shit, I ask, “Where are Jake and Kendall?”

  “With Uncle Jack and Jade, fishing,” Alex answers.

  Now I lose my shit. “Why do you need to go on dates, Mom? You’re married and have five kids, for crying out loud!”

  “Tessa, this is between your parents, our relationship, not that of our children’s. You don’t get to make the decisions here. Things haven’t changed. We both still love you,” Dad says sternly.

  “Thank you, John,” Mom says.

  “Are you freaking kidding me? You’re okay with this?” I yell at him. “Hey, Dad, why don’t we just start pimping her out?”

  “That’s enough, young lady.” Mom stands abruptly. She hugs Alex then walks over to me. “I will see you at your game on Tuesday.”

  “Don’t plan on it, bitch.”

  She immediately slaps my face, and before I do something worse than calling my mom a bitch, I jump up and run to the bathroom.

  Tears fill my eyes as I look in the mirror, a handprint adorning my face. Then I suddenly start laughing and, for the life of me, I can’t stop.

  “Tessa, you okay in there?” Alex asks from just outside the door.

  “Hell yes!” I continue to laugh.

  “Open the door.”

  “It isn’t locked.” I laugh louder.

  He walks in and looks at me. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you first.”

  I continue laughing. “Don’t you see? This gets us off the ho
ok. No more straight and narrow, Alex. Now we can let loose and have fun.”

  “No, Tessa, that’s not right, and you know it.” He hugs me, and it immediately turns my laughter into tears.

  “Why? Because she said so? Look at her now, Alex! All of our life, we have done what she says, and now look! At! Her! Seriously, we’ve been taught all our lives that God’s law and family are what matters the most, and we’ve done a really good job following that. And now look at her! Look at her!” I sob. “I will not do a damn thing she says. She’s nothing but a phony. And what the hell is he doing? Letting her date other people? What the hell is that? So, no, Alex, I won’t follow their rules. I’ll do what feels right and good.”

  Alex holds me tighter. “Tessa, you’re their child, not their judge. Keep that in mind.”

  I look up at him. “This makes no sense.”

  “Not much has over the years, but don’t you fall apart.” He pulls me in for another tight hug.

  The phone rings, and I jump up to answer it.

  “Hey, baby, be there in thirty.”

  Shit, shit, shit.

  “Okay.”

  I jump out of bed, grab clothes out of mine and Kendall’s shared closet, and realize I haven’t a clue as to what the temperature is.

  Still wrapped in my robe, I run down the stairs and yell, “Alex, what’s the weather like?”

  “Sixty-five degrees and sunny. Why?” he answered.

  “I forgot I was invited to dinner at Lucas’s at five. He’s on his way, and I’m a wreck.”

  “Did you ask Dad?”

  Ask? I think with a huff.

  “No, can you tell him for me?”

  Looking in the bathroom mirror, I am horrified. My face and eyes are all puffy and red, and I swear I can still see Mom’s handprint on my face.

  I turn on the cold water and splash myself over and over. Then I run a brush through my hair and consider putting it up in a bananas clip, but then I remember hate them and grab a butterfly clip, which I also dislike, but I have to do something with my hair. I brush it out and clip the sides back.

  Grabbing Jade’s bag, that is still here, I use her foundation to try to cover up the red, and I even swipe some mascara on my lashes, even though I’ve always thought mascara looked silly. I gotta say, though, I kind of love how long my lashes look in black.

  Next, I run upstairs and grab the black, knee-length shorts and throw on a gray cami and a darker gray cardigan.

  I see a pair of Molly’s sandals—black thongs—and grab them before running down the stairs, where I rush to the bathroom to brush the hell out of my teeth as I look myself over.

  “You’re good.” I nod to my insecurities staring back at me in the mirror and, for once, I mean it.

  I hurry out to the kitchen, expecting to have a disagreement with Dad. Instead, I find him sitting with Lucas.

  Where is Alex?

  “Feeling better, Tessa?” Dad asks.

  Good Lord, what has Lucas told him?

  “Lucas said he thinks maybe it was the food. His stomach has been off today, too. You’ll be home early, right? It’s a school night.” Dad stands up, kisses my cheek, and then walks into the living room.

  Leaning back against the counter, I sigh.

  Lucas chuckles. “You ready to go?”

  “Yes.” I head for the door.

  “Hey, you going to grab some shoes? I could carry you, but …”

  “Ha-ha.”

  “Grab a swimsuit, Tessa,” he calls as I head back to the bathroom to grab the shoes.

  “Don’t you think it’s too cold?”

  “Don’t sass me, girl,” he says, smiling.

  When I come out, he’s not in the kitchen.

  “He went out to say hello to your brother,” Dad calls to me.

  When I walk outside, the door slams once, twice, three times, and I cringe. But then when I look back and see him … I really don’t give a shit.

  I love seeing him from a distance. It gives me the ability to take him all in, and there is a lot of him. He’s wearing light-colored jeans, a black tee, and that damn white hat, leaning against his car, smiling. His clothes, I know are probably expensive, but they’re not over-the-top or showy. They’re simple, yet he’s far from it. In this case, the man is definitely making the clothes.

  “You gonna stand there all day, Tessa?”

  I shake my head and walk toward him. He opens the door for me, takes my bag, and I slide in.

  Once on the road, Lucas asks, “You feeling okay?”

  “No, I feel awful, and I look like death.”

  He grabs my hand. “You look great. How did things go with your mom today?”

  “Awful. I hate her.”

  “Those are harsh words.”

  “Sorry. I was just taught one way, and they can act another all of the sudden? It’s not right. I called my mother a bitch today, and she slapped me across the face. I know I deserved it, but it still pissed me off.”

  “In less than twenty-four hours, we have both called someone a bitch and been slapped for it. Word’s like a trigger. We should avoid it, huh?”

  “I’m so sorry. I don’t even remember.” I grab his hand.

  “I’m messing with you, baby.” He kisses my hand then clears his throat. “You’re about to meet my mother, a functioning drunk since I was three, sober now for two months, who, when she’s drinking, brings different men home all the time. I’m fine, haven’t always made the best choices, but I’m fine. I don’t like what she does, but I’m respectful to her, and it has worked so far. Let this situation work for you, Tessa, and you’ll be all right.”

  “I’ll try,” I say uneasily. “I’m getting really nervous about meeting her.”

  “You’ll be fine. Just don’t judge me based on her.” He squeezes my hand, and then silence falls between us as we’re probably both internally considering our situations.

  We drive up a big hill and pass several small homes. At the top of the hill sits, almost majestically, a newer Colonial. It’s magnificent, much different than the farm. But, like the farm, there is nothing beside the house for as far as the eye can see.

  Even before he pulls in, I know it’s his home.

  He pulls up in front of a three-car, attached garage and hops out.

  I open my door and step out as he rounds the front, my bag in his hand.

  “I’d have gotten that door.”

  I smile at him then look around at the open fields and the forest behind the home.

  “Come on.” He takes my hand and walks around back.

  A sidewalk leads through a flowery path to a black, vinyl privacy fence. Lucas opens the gate, and I smile when I see the inground pool.

  “This is amazing.”

  “It’s cool. The pond is amazing.”

  I step inside the gate and see a hot tub, an outdoor kitchen, and his mom standing at a huge grill. Her hair is long, curly, and black, like his. She’s also perfect in her outfit, not a cardigan and knee-length shorts. She’s wearing a black tank top with a wrap around her waist.

  When she turns, she smiles and, just like Lucas, she has perfectly straight, brilliantly white teeth.

  “Mom, this is my girlfriend, Tessa. Tessa, my mom, Kate,” Lucas introduces us.

  “You are stunning,” falls out of my mouth, and then I feel myself immediately turning red.

  “And you are precious.” She sets down the tongs and walks over to me, takes my hands, and looks me up and down. “And gorgeous. Lucas, can we keep her?”

  He smiles. “That’s the plan, Mom.”

  “It’ll be about thirty minutes. How about you two take a swim? The pool is nice and warm.”

  “Sounds great. Come on, Tessa. I’ll show you the bathroom.” He grabs my hand, and I follow him in through the French doors.

  He points left. “The kitchen.” Then to the right. “Dining room.” We walk on the hardwood floors to the front of the house, which is massive, with huge windows.

 
“Bathroom’s upstairs.”

  “Wasn’t much of a tour.” I laugh nervously, following him to what I know is bound to be his bedroom.

  He walks me to one end of the hall and opens the door. “Mom’s room.”

  He’s about to close the door, and I am definitely buying time when I step in. “I love the color. And the room is huge. Is that a king-sized bed?”

  “Yeah, have a look around.”

  So, I do.

  The king-sized, cast-iron bed is against the far wall. The wall color a deep wine. Her bathroom is also large, with a shower and separate Jacuzzi bathtub, granite countertops, and a double vanity. The toilet is in a tiny private room, opposite side the enormous walk-in closet. It has light purple walls and stone-colored tile.

  “Not much more in here, baby,” he says, clearly amused.

  I nod and turn around. He takes my hand and walks us back down the hall.

  “Three bedrooms, and a shared bathroom.”

  He opens his door. “Casa Links. Get acquainted, Tessa Ross.”

  His room is identical to his mother’s in size, except the walls are gray and the room has wooden floors. His bedding and curtains are black. The bed is a king-sized, four-poster in black. In one corner, a full trophy case, with a weight bench in front of it. I walk around and look in his large closet, which happens to be bigger than mine and with more clothes than Kendall and I have combined. On his large, black dresser sit a couple of pictures.

  “Your sisters?” I ask, and he nods.

  There are three prom pictures; one was with Sadi, and I really didn’t care to look at the other two. His room is spotless, just like the rest of his house.

  His bathroom is a bit smaller than his mother’s, with only one sink and a large walk-in, tiled shower.

  “Your home is beautiful.”

  “It pales in comparison to you,” Lucas says, completely serious. “And those pictures, they can go. I want those frames filled with you,” he says, raising an eyebrow.

  Nodding, I look down.

  “Let’s get dressed,” he says, taking off his shirt, and I can’t help but look up. When I do, he smirks and winks. “You like what you see?”

  I feel the burn hit my cheeks but answer honestly. “Yes.”