“I can help you with that.” He nodded. “We’ll start tomorrow night.” He slid his hands into his pockets as he studied me. “Trust me, you won’t regret it.”
“I’m not so sure about that. But I need to do something. I don’t want to be afraid anymore.”
“Then I’ll help you.” He took my hand and gave it a squeeze. “Meet me in the courtyard tomorrow night after dinner. We’ll find a place we can practice.”
“I know a place.” My heart skipped a beat as I wondered if it was right for me to offer it.
“Great. I’ll see you then.” He released my hand and left the music room.
I felt a strange urge to go after him. I wanted to know more about the sadness that he harbored. I wanted to know everything.
Instead, I resisted. Yes, we made beautiful music together. Yes, there was something about him that drew me to him in a way that surprised me. But that was exactly why I had to be careful.
Everything at Oak Brook was delicate—my presence, my friendships, my reputation. I couldn’t risk losing everything all over again. Not when I’d just begun to rebuild it.
Chapter 6
I woke up the next morning with the memory of the night before heavy on my mind. How had Gabriel just shown up in the music room when I was there? How did our playing blend so perfectly together when we barely knew one another?
As I prepared for the day, I caught sight of my reflection. A year hadn’t changed much in terms of my appearance. My nose seemed a little wider and my cheeks a little fuller, but in general, I doubted that anyone could notice.
But my eyes—they were so much darker. As if a shadow had settled in.
I took a deep breath and tried to will it away. But it lingered.
After I splashed some water on my face, I headed for the kitchen and found Maby working on some toast.
“Morning.” She flashed a smile at me. “I didn’t hear you come in last night. What were you up to?”
“I just went to play some music.” I leaned against the counter and snatched a piece of toast from her plate.
“Joke’s on you. I was making it for you.” She laughed.
“Thanks.” I grinned as I took a big bite.
“How are you doing?” She looked into my eyes. “Really?”
“Okay.” I shrugged. “As okay as I can be.”
“It’s just going to take a little time, but everyone will forget.” She poured some orange juice into a glass, then handed it to me.
My hand trembled as I took it. Her words echoed through my mind.
“I’m sure.”
“You’re not okay.” She sighed. “Jenny, why won’t you talk to me? We’re best friends. You haven’t said a word to me about any of it.”
“I just can’t.” I set the glass down. “I’m sorry, Maby. Every time I start to think I can, I just can’t.”
“It’s okay.” She hugged me. “You don’t have to. I just want you to know that when you’re ready, I’m here.” She released me, then smiled. “And what about the talent show? Are you going to do it?”
“I thought about it. If Gabriel would do it with me, then I would, but I can’t go out there alone.”
“Gabriel said no?” Her eyes widened. “Why?”
“He says that he doesn’t want to make himself more of a target.”
“Hm. Sounds like he has some issues of his own to deal with.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry. I’d offer to do it with you, but we both know my musical talent doesn’t exist.”
“You make up for it with how hard you try, though.” I laughed and gave her a light shove.
“Loudness does not equate talent. That’s what I’ve been told.” She laughed as well, then looked into my eyes. “I hope you have a good day, Jenny, but if you don’t, I want you to come find me. Okay? I’m here for you.” She squeezed my hand. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to be there when you needed me the most. But I am here for you now—if you’ll let me be.”
“Thanks, Maby, that means a lot to me.” I hugged her. “I’m going to be fine—I know I am—it’s just taking me longer than I expected to get there.”
“Take your time, don’t rush it.” She patted my back. “I’ve got to go meet Oliver, but if you want to come along, you’re welcome to.”
“No, I think I’d better get into the music room and practice a little more. You’re right, music is going to be my way back to me again.”
I spent most of my morning playing. A part of me hoped that Gabriel might show up to play with me, but when the bell rang for the first class of the day, he still hadn’t shown up.
I made my way through my morning classes and did my best to ignore the whispers and stares. Maby said that they would forget, and maybe they would, but the truth was that didn’t make me feel any better.
As I walked into the cafeteria, I braced myself for an onslaught of stares and whispers. But a person seated at our usual lunch table distracted me from all that.
“Gabriel?” I paused just behind him.
“Hi.” He glanced up at me. “Maby invited me. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Oh, I doubt she does.” Maby grinned as she leaned into Oliver’s shoulder. “Get your lunch before it’s gone. Pizza today.”
I started to respond but decided against it and headed for the lunch line instead. I didn’t mind having Gabriel at the table, but I didn’t exactly know how to react to it either. He had that way of seeing so far inside of me and I didn’t want that to happen with all my friends around.
By the time I returned to the table, Gabriel appeared to be fitting in just fine as he joked with Wes and Apple.
I set my tray on the table and sat down beside him—the only spot still available at the table.
“So, tell me about this private concert you two gave during music class yesterday.” Maby leveled her eyes on Gabriel.
My muscles tensed. I recognized that look in her eyes. Determination.
“Oh—uh—we just happened to play together.” Gabriel shrugged, then turned his attention to his food.
“I hear you’re both a sure bet for the talent show.” She looked over at Oliver and smiled, then looked back at Gabriel. “I can’t wait to see you two play together.”
“You heard wrong.” Gabriel met her eyes.
“We’re not going to be in the talent show.” I shot a brief glare at Maby and hoped she would get the message.
From the gleam in her eyes I guessed that she did, but it did nothing to lessen her determination.
“Why not?” Maby crossed her arms.
“Maby, that’s enough.” I frowned. “He doesn’t want to, okay?”
“Oh, trust me, that’s not going to be okay.” Wes chuckled, then glanced over at Fifi. “Don’t we have something to do right now?”
“Not a thing.” Alana looked between both of them. “You’re staying right here.”
“Gabriel?” Maby stared at him. “I asked you a question. Why don’t you want to do the talent show?”
“I’m not interested.” He stared right back at her. “So drop it.”
“So drop it?” She laughed. “Oh, I will give you a pass because you don’t know me very well yet, but trust me when I tell you, I am not someone who drops things.”
“Maybe you should be.”
“Maybe you should just tell me why you don’t want to be in the talent show.” Maby smiled.
“Maby.” I groaned. “He asked you to drop it.”
“And I choose not to.” She shrugged. “I can’t help it, Jenny. I want to see you up on that stage, and if Gabriel here is the guy that will make that happen, then I at least need an explanation for why he refuses to do it.”
“I don’t owe you anything.” Gabriel stood up from the table. “Thanks for the invite to lunch, but I think I’d rather eat in the stairwell from now on.” He shook his head as he turned away, his eyes briefly landing on me.
Pressure built up within me. I knew I needed to say something. But what?
&nbs
p; “Maby, I don’t want to be in the talent show either. So just leave it alone.”
“You’re only saying that because he doesn’t want to be.” Maby rolled her eyes. “There’s no need to be this dramatic about it.”
“Enough!” Gabriel turned back to face her, his voice sharp. “You don’t have any right to push her around or tell her what to do! She said no, so leave her alone!”
“Gabriel!” I stood up quickly in the same moment that Maby stood up as well.
Chapter 7
“You have the wrong idea here, Gabe.” Maby glared across the table at him. “Jenny is my best friend and I will always look out for her best interests.”
“Oh yeah? Is that so? Because it sure looks to me like you’re just another bully.” He shook his head as he turned and walked out of the cafeteria.
“Wow, that one has some pent-up energy, doesn’t he?” Maby crossed her arms.
“I told you to stop pushing him.” I frowned as I met her eyes. “Maby, I know you’re only trying to help, but Gabriel’s feelings matter too. Clearly he doesn’t want to talk about it.”
“No, he just wants to accuse me of being a bully.” Maby huffed as she sat back down beside Oliver. “I am not a bully.”
“No, you’re not.” I stared at my friend for a long moment. I wanted to thank her for how much she cared about me, but she wasn’t the one that needed me at the moment. “But Gabriel doesn’t know that.”
“Go on.” She sighed and waved me toward the door of the cafeteria. “But I’ll warn you right now, Jenny, any guy that stands up for you like that is looking for a lot more than friendship.”
Her words rang in my ears as I hurried out of the cafeteria in the direction I’d seen Gabriel turn.
Was she right? Was that the reason for the intensity of my feelings when I was around Gabriel? He had a thing for me? The thought set off alarm bells in the back of my mind. Of course that wasn’t something that could happen.
I pushed the thought away and focused instead on the way that he’d left the cafeteria. It was pretty clear to me that he was upset and I didn’t want him to be alone.
I headed for the one place I knew I would go if I were upset. My instincts proved to be right, as I heard him playing his guitar from the hallway just outside the music room. I hesitated there for a moment and peered inside at him.
He leaned over his guitar, his hair over his eyes, his muscles tense. A few seconds slid into a few minutes as I just watched him play. Then he began to sing. His voice was so soft I could barely hear it, but once I did, it flowed through my senses. Smooth and deep, he had a talent for singing, but sadness clung to every word he sang. It was a sadness that I recognized.
I closed my eyes and continued to listen. It felt as if the school around me disappeared and all that existed was the sound of his voice and the melody of the guitar.
When my eyes fluttered open again, I realized that I’d been holding my breath. I’d been so lost in his music that I’d forgotten how to breathe. I took a slow breath and intended to continue to be silent and listen, but my body shifted and my elbow bumped into the door. As it slid open a little further, it creaked, announcing my presence.
He looked up at me in the same moment that I took a step back. The music stopped.
“What are you doing?” He stood up, his voice rough. “Spying on me?”
“I was just listening.” I stepped into the classroom as my heart pounded. All of a sudden the worst thing that could happen to me would be his telling me to leave. Something had shifted inside me and I needed to know more about him. I didn’t have any idea how I could go on without knowing more. “Just like you were listening to me last night, remember?”
“It’s not the same thing.” He frowned as he pulled off the strap of his guitar, then set the instrument carefully down in its stand. “I don’t sing in front of other people.”
“Why not?” I held up my hands as he narrowed his eyes. “Don’t get upset, I’m not pressuring you. I just think that maybe the two of us could figure some of this out together. Maybe we could get to the bottom of what’s bothering us both. Wouldn’t that be a good thing?”
“I don’t know.” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked away from me. “I’m just better off on my own.”
“That’s not true.” I stepped closer to him. With a hint of hesitation, I placed my hands on his shoulders and looked into his eyes. “I know it’s not true because I say the same thing. I tell myself that being alone is easier. But I know the truth, Gabe. That’s just a lie I tell myself. I’m betting you’re lying to yourself too.”
“Maybe.” He didn’t pull away from my touch. “When I’m with you, the last thing I want is to be alone.”
“I know.” I whispered. “Gabe, you have such a beautiful voice. I just don’t understand why you wouldn’t want other people to hear it.”
“I used to do a few local shows.” He shrugged and pulled away from my hands. “But I don’t like to play in public anymore.”
My eyes widened as I studied him. I couldn’t imagine him out on stage, as withdrawn as he was right now. What had changed that had made him go from being someone comfortable on stage to someone who didn’t want to be seen?
“You can tell me what happened, Gabriel. I’m here to listen.”
“No.” He shook his head, then walked back over to his guitar. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Okay, okay.” I followed after him. “We don’t have to talk about anything that you don’t want to. But I do think that you should consider the possibility of being in the talent show. Music means everything to me and I can tell that it means a whole lot to you too. Hiding from it isn’t going to help you to heal.”
“When I asked Maby to drop it, I meant it.” He slung the guitar strap across his neck. “You just said we don’t have to talk about what I don’t want to talk about. So why do you keep pushing?”
“Why did you push me yesterday? When you saw me with those girls? Why did you tell me that I should learn to stand up for myself?” I raised an eyebrow.
“Because I don’t want to see you get hurt.”
“And neither do I, Gabe. I don’t want to see you hurting yourself. Or holding yourself back.” I sat down in the chair beside him and tried to meet his eyes. “I know we don’t know each other very well, but I can tell that something is weighing on you.”
“Yes, and what’s weighing on you?” He looked up at me. “Are you ready to tell me all your secrets?”
“I don’t have any secrets. Not really.” I looked down at the floor.
“I’m supposed to believe that?” He nudged my knee with his own.
“For now.” I looked back up at him. “Why don’t we just play together? Would you do that with me? Last night was so amazing.”
“That I can do.” He strummed his fingers across his guitar.
“Will you sing with me?” I stood up and walked over to the piano.
“I told you, I don’t sing in public.” He frowned and followed me over to the piano.
“I’m not the public, I’m just me.” I sat down on the bench, then turned to look at him. “Please?”
“That’s not fair.” He stared into my eyes.
“What’s not fair?” I gazed back at him.
“You know already, don’t you?” He shook his head as he adjusted his guitar.
“Know what?” I frowned.
“That I’d do anything for you.”
Chapter 8
His words startled me. Had he just said what I thought he said?
“I’m not going to pretend it’s not true.” He shrugged. “I’m not going to pretend that it makes sense either. I’ve met a lot of people in my life and only one of them took my breath away the way that you did.”
“Are you trying to distract me?” I narrowed my eyes. “You think if you keep flattering me, I’m going to forget that I want to make music with you?”
“That’s for you to decide, I guess.” He smiled. �
��What do you think?”
“I think I should play and you should sing.” I began to run my fingers across the keys. I felt his eyes still on me and the tension that crackled between us indicated that he had more to say, but instead of speaking, he began to sing and play his guitar.
Moments later I joined in. Though the song was familiar, something about the way he sang it made it entirely new to me. My skin tingled as he leaned close and it crossed my mind that he wasn’t just singing, he was singing to me.
I glanced up at him when we reached the chorus and found his gaze waiting to meet mine. Our voices lifted up together, louder and stronger than I’d intended. The sweet melody that danced back and forth between my keys and his strings enthralled me to the point that I almost didn’t notice the people that had gathered outside the classroom door.
It wasn’t until someone stepped inside that I became more fully aware of their presence.
“Oh wow! How beautiful!” A woman clapped her hands as she walked further into the room. “Gabriel, I’m so glad to hear you playing and singing again.” She walked toward him, her smile wide and tears in her eyes.
“Mom.” Gabriel let the guitar hang against his body as he looked at her. “I didn’t know anyone was listening.”
I studied the woman who was touching his cheeks. She looked young to be his mother. I guessed that she’d had him fairly young. She dressed like any other teacher at Oak Brook Academy, but there was a weariness to her features. Not wrinkles, not bags under the eyes, just a low-key exhaustion that made me want to wrap her up in a blanket and give her some hot tea.
Her gaze shifted from her son to me and instantly I saw her expression change.
Yes, she recognized me. My stomach twisted as her eyes narrowed. It was clear to me what her opinion of me was. She didn’t have to say a word. I turned back to the piano and did my best to hide my own reaction.
“Well, I was listening.” She gave his shoulder a light pat. “I guess you were practicing for the talent show?”
“No, not that.” He cleared his throat.
A Fresh Start: A Young Adult Sweet Romance (Oak Brook Academy Book 5) Page 3
