Gigolo All the Way

by JN Welsh

  Sadness spread across his face and Elle wished she could press rewind. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

  “Stop judging me, Elle, and you won’t have to keep apologizing.” He sprang to his feet, towering over her.

  Elle cursed her ignorance. She had seen his contract and the work he’d be doing for Dr. Ginger. He was going to be helping a lot of people with his consulting business. She attempted to change the subject. “Why don’t you escort during the holidays?”

  Cole sighed. “The holidays should be spent with family. My family is not here.”

  “Was it always like that for you?” She asked gently as he paced.

  “Our family focused on service during the holidays, so I never really celebrated it the way most people do. It was always surrounded by a feeling of guilt.”

  “Guilt? In what way?” Elle reached for him and brought him back to sit on the bed with her.

  “I never associated the holidays around this time of year as a jolly time of year. I was in a soup kitchen, or handing out coats, or cleaning kitchens of homeless shelters. When I came to the States it was just something that had taken me a while to enjoy. Every year I try to enjoy it a bit more.”

  “Did you get presents?”

  “No. My gifts were the joy of service and helping others.”

  “That should be enough, I guess.” Deep down her heart ached. Her parents made everything so festive. Even when they struggled and couldn’t afford to give their children a lot of gifts, they made a special meal or at least decorated the home and played music, so they could dance. Her Uncle Desi was big on service and when they used to all live in the New York area, they would volunteer at a shelter. The adults would feed the homeless and the kids would give gifts to and play with the homeless children. It did remind them of what they had, but their parents also let them know how special they were.

  “Did you feel special, Cole?” Elle played with the timepiece around her neck, clasping it in her fist.

  He smiled tightly. “Sure.”

  His answer told her everything.

  “I’m sure you’ve been around other families but is it uncomfortable being with us? Seeing us like this as a family? Laughing, overindulging, and being frivolous?”

  “No. Not uncomfortable. Just different.”

  She wanted to ask him the details about how he normally spent the holidays, but her mother—calling both her and Cole from downstairs—cut them short.

  He patted her hand. “We should join them.”

  Elle lagged behind him, staring at his broad shoulders and inhaling his wafting fragrance. She was paying Cole to be here to play a role, but a deeper part of her felt responsible for ensuring he had a good Christmas at the lake. He had broken one of his escorting rules to be with her—one that was deep-rooted in family experience.

  She swallowed the thickness in her throat, wanting to dissolve into the steps leading to the family room. She judged him when she was the biggest hypocrite. Cole had made an exception for her and she needed to do the same for him.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Holly was not yet done with her Christmas shopping and a last-minute trip into town was imperative. Elle was happy to accompany her since she’d done all her shopping and liked a little pressure-free shopping. She also wanted to get something done for Cole’s business. Though she had gotten all her gifts, she didn’t mind picking up additional stocking stuffers with Holly.

  “Want me to drive you?” Cole was by her side as she readied herself to leave.

  “No, honey. We could use a little girl time.” The words rolled off her tongue like she’d been calling him ‘honey’ for years.

  “Take my car,” he suggested.

  “Holly’s driving the mini-van, so she can fill it with unnecessary shopping.” She winked.

  Cole laughed and stoked her cheek. “Okay. Be safe.” He kissed her a few seconds longer than a peck and she wished his lips lingered a bit more.

  “Break up the suck face fest.” Holly wormed her way between her and Cole and snatched Elle’s wrist in the process. “Let’s go, cuz.”

  “Bye,” she called to Cole and followed Holly.

  They arrived into town and it was crowded with other folks who had the same last-minute shopping idea. They moseyed like cattle from shop to shop with their bags in tow. Holly had been pretty normal on the trip into town and just chatted about the mundane. Elle thought she might be safe from any further interrogation.

  “So, Cole is nice,” Holly noted, as she evaluated a window display and decided on whether or not she wanted to go inside.

  “He’s a keeper,” Elle agreed.

  “He’s damn fine. I mean his body, his face, and those eyes.” Holly fanned herself. “He’s not a jerk, he treats you and the family well. I’d have to create someone to make him any more perfect. I know you told us the story but where did you really find him?”

  “What do you mean?” Elle tried to appear clueless.

  “Seriously, Elle? I’ve known you all your life. Do you really think I’m as naïve as Jasper? I’m not as frantic for you to find someone, like Auntie Shan and Uncle Terrence, that I can’t see the story you told at brunch was entirely bullshit.”

  “What?” Elle tapped the tip of her nose.

  “Yeah, I know. Stop trying to think of another lie I won’t buy.” Holly knocked Elle’s hand from her nose and folded her arms. “Spill it, who is he?”

  Elle was shocked, nervous, and relieved at the same time. “Shit! Okay, but you can’t tell anyone.”

  “Super promise.” Holly crossed her fingers.

  “He’s a gigolo from an elite escort agency.” Elle rambled as they continued to walk past shops and passersby. “I tried to hire an actor or phone a friend but it’s the holidays and he was the only one available. Mom and Dad are going to kill me if they find out.” Elle gave Holly a few more details.

  Holly evaluated her as Elle purged her sins. “You’re fucking him, aren’t you? I would be.”

  “Holly.” She blushed. “Why aren’t you shocked?”

  “I can pretend to be if you want. I watch too much TV to be shocked anymore.” Her cousin laughed.

  “No, it’s cool,” Elle mumbled.

  Holly nudged her. “What’s going on?”

  “I kind of met him before he became my gigolo boyfriend for the week.”

  “The plot thickens. Do tell.” Holly motioned her inside one of the clothing stores and perused the items on the rack.

  Elle recanted the story about how she and Cole met at the bar.

  “So, you always liked him.”

  “You’re missing the point about the woman who kissed him,” Elle reminded her. “That made me feel…”

  “…Like shit, not good enough, bested. I can go on,” Holly noted.

  “Well…yeah. I get that the sex is casual, consensual…whatever you want to call it Holls. I’ve had sex, too. But I got a chance to witness him with another woman. A client.” Elle had been unfair to Cole. She needled him about prostitution, but she knew he was neither a prostitute, nor a bad person. She was the ultimate teapot calling the kettle black, given her ongoing deception to her family.

  She promised herself to be better because it wasn’t about sex with women so much as it was the betrayal of seeing him choose another woman. Like so many before him had done to her. With her feelings for him growing wild, she was scared that he’d do it again. This time the stakes were too high.

  “Ooooh, the shit you must have imagined them doing.” Holly’s jeering comment hit an already sensitive nerve. “I get it, but he seems like a good guy.”

  “He is,” Elle stated.

  “Look at you, defending your man,” Holly teased.

  “He’s not my man, Holly.”

  Holly prodded. “But you want him to be.”

  “I’m his last client. After this week, he’s done with the gigolo business. We’re done. He’ll upgrade and find his happily ever after elsewhere and I’ll be alone. Again.”
Elle woke up. “Oh my God! What am I saying? Cole and I are not in a relationship.”

  “Sounds like you are. Also sounds like you are scared shitless.” Holly started to sing an old popular song. “He’s just a gigolo.”

  “When did you get so morally loose?” Elle asked.

  “Since I got married.” Holly sighed.

  “Great.”

  “Don’t get me wrong, cuz. I know why you did all this.” Holly was pensive. “Do you remember when Spencer and I started dating? The family wouldn’t let up on us about marriage and kids. It was awful. I think that’s why we married so fast. Maybe too fast.”

  Elle watched Holly bite her lip and lower her gaze. “What’s that about?”

  “Nothing.” Her cousin deflected the question like a ball unexpectedly swatted in her direction. “This pressure to marry is all bullshit you know.”

  “Hey, what’s up with you? Seriously? Since when are you down on marital bliss?”

  “I-I’m not.” Holly chewed the inside of her lip. “Just be careful.”

  “Careful of what?” The nagging feeling of defensiveness formed in Elle’s chest.

  Holly held up a gloved palm. “Chill Elle, it’s only a word of caution.”

  Elle relaxed her shoulder but wasn't convinced something more wasn’t going on with her cousin. She prepared herself for what Holly readied to say.

  “It’s not like you’re not actively trying to date, Elle. You want a boyfriend and for the life of me, it’s the biggest mystery why you aren’t someone’s cherished one already. I see how you ogle Cole. You like him, and I think those feelings are growing. Am I right or am I right?”

  Elle was silent.

  “You hired him to be here. He’s very attentive and it makes me think that his feelings for you are mutual.”

  “But…” Elle probed.

  “He has to have detachment skills to do his business yet still make his clients feel adored and wanted.”

  Elle was his client, but what they had shared so far felt different and maybe that was all part of it. “Don’t worry, Holly I have no intention of falling in love with Cole.” Every cell in her body rejected the lie, yet she continued her delusion. “How would he fit into the family if they knew who he really was? How would I introduce him to people? What if we were together and we ran into one of his clients?”

  “Wow. You sure dwell a lot on what other people think.” Holly frowned. “Try to consider what you think for a change. Plus, it’s not like you haven’t done some shady shit. I know your past, too, sister. You go on and on about Cole’s clients but what if you two ran into one of your ex-whoevers?”

  Elle felt the heat cover her face and ears.

  “Yeah.” Holly nodded.

  “Let’s just get the gifts and get back.”

  “To your, Gig-o-lo—Gig-o-lo—Gigolo all the way—Oh what fun, it is to romp—in a cabin far away.” Holly sang.

  “Moron.” Elle hooked her arm in her cousin’s and dragged her to the checkout line to hasten the outing.

  ###

  When she and Holly returned to the house, she showered and changed into a pair of jeggings and a holiday sweater. She found Cole in the kitchen making tea. She could hear the kids playing in the game room and surely Jasper and his girlfriend were in their room or had scurried to the smoosh room. Holly and Spencer strolled toward the lake after they had unloaded the car.

  Elle sauntered over to her mother, joining her on the loveseat. “Hey, Mom. Did you start the fire? It’s nice.” Elle leaned into her mother, interrupting Shandra’s reading.

  “No. Cole did,” her mom replied.

  Just then Cole shuffled over and set a cup of tea down on the coffee table. The fragrant spices of cinnamon, nutmeg, and apple filled her nose. “Here you are Miss Shan.”

  “Thank you, Cole.” Her mother gave him a silly grin and her eyes shined up at him. It was then Elle knew he had won over her mother. A pang of guilt pricked her heart. Her mother would be hurt when Elle delivered the news she and Cole broke up.

  “Would you like some tea, sweetness?” he asked. “It’ll warm you up.”

  His voice alone made her hotter than she wanted to be. Especially in front of her mother. “No, thank you, honey. I’m going to make some hot chocolate for the house in a bit, but I’ll take some water.”

  “Coming right up.” He disappeared back into the kitchen area.

  “I can tell he really cares about you. When he first arrived, I wasn’t sure but now I see his love for you. The way he adoringly hovers around you and tends to your needs. He reminds me of your father.” Her mother almost swooned from her own romantic tale of what was transpiring between her and Cole.

  “Mom, stop.”

  “I’m glad you waited. I know we always encouraged you to find someone—”

  “Encourage?” Elle’s eyebrows rose at her mother’s severe understatement. “The whole family stalks me about this, Mom.”

  “And we were wrong. You were just waiting for someone special and I think you’ve found it with Cole. He’s wonderful, dear. Your father and I are happy for you.”

  Oh, jeez. Elle admired Cole. He was a tall drink who returned with one for her.

  “Thanks, honey.” Elle’s endearment rolled off her tongue.

  Cole tapped her chin and retreated back to the kitchen. She loved to watch him leave, her hands itching to pat his muscular ass.

  “Go make him some cookies.” Her mother prodded.

  Elle remembered the story Cole told her about how he spent his Christmas. She wanted him to have more than his usual miserly holiday this year, even if they were just pretending to be dating.

  Her mother interrupted her thoughts. “I won’t make the announcement yet to give you two a little time.”

  “Thanks, Mom.”

  Elle meandered over to Cole who sat on a stool drinking his tea. She nestled into his open legs and put her arm around him, kissing cinnamon spiced lips. “I appreciate you being so kind to my family.”

  “My pleasure.” His hands massaged her shoulders and back and she was putty in his hands.

  “Want some cookies?” She moaned.

  “Depends on what kind of cookies you’re offering. If memory serves me right, you have a tendency to renege on your offers.”

  “Back again to that night we first met at the bar, are we?” She briefly pressed her forehead into his chest. “Christmas cookies that you eat,” she clarified.

  He released her. “I eat the other cookies, too.” He blew on his tea before taking a few sips.

  Damn, she wanted him to blow on her the same way. “Cole?”

  “Just seeing you blush like that is reward enough.”

  Elle opened the cabinets and refrigerator and pulled out the ingredients she needed for the cookies. “Do you want to help me?” Her voice was hoarse with desire and she tried to focus.

  “Sure. Are they any good?”

  She guzzled water to cool down. “You’ll see.”

  She put on holiday music and soon Harry Connick Jr.’s It Must've Been Ol' Santa Claus filled the kitchen. She danced as she worked on a few recipes at once, since many of them had the similar base of sugar, flour, and butter. Creativity continued from there. White and dark chocolate, nuts, dried berries, jam, coffee, and spices like cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger contributed to all the cookie varieties she made, and Cole was a very capable sous chef.

  “You really are pretty good in the kitchen,” Elle complimented. “Did you ever make cookies with your family during the holidays? Even to bring to the shelters you volunteered at?”

  He shook his head. “Maybe once or twice with my grandparents, but I was so young. So at least …gosh…twenty years ago.”

  “So how do you spend the holidays in New York?” She spoke low so that her mother didn’t hear them, but enough so he could hear her over the music.

  “I normally go to an Italian restaurant and shoot the shit with the guys for a bit. Then, I go home and eat some store-bou
ght Christmas cookies and pour a little rum in my eggnog or hot chocolate and head to bed.”

  Elle’s insides twisted at the thought of him alone on Christmas. “Store bought Christmas cookies? That’s a travesty. You have all those clients. None of them could make you a batch?”

  “I service them—fulfill their needs. Escorting is about what I can do for them. How I can make them feel special. Not the other way around.”

  “Talk about work-ethic.” Her comment was fraught with jealousy, but Cole didn’t entertain her, he just smiled. “Can you pass me the eggs?”

  He did, and she cracked a few, gently separating the yolks from the whites for her spiked eggnog cookies.

  They were only acting like they were in a relationship, so why did she care about what other women did or didn’t do for him? Because when his eyes landed on her, her whole body woke up. When he touched her she melted. The admission further tightened her shoulders, but she took it out on a bowl of dense cookie dough.

  “I don’t mean to sound like a bitch, I just don’t understand how you can embrace such a temporary existence with these women. Don't women get jealous sharing you? I mean…I’m not…I just feel—”

  Cole smiled at her jerky admittance. “You forget that they’re the ones who want it to be temporary or they wouldn’t hire me.”

  Again, he had a point. It was clear these women weren’t searching for a long-term relationship, but companionship and boyfriend experiences without the commitment. What about him? By all intents and purposes, it worked out for everyone involved. She could see the separation, but what did that mean for them? When she was with him their interactions felt different and real, but was this all just a paid gig for him?

  Her limbs jittered. “What about you?” She kept her eyes cast on the dough she rolled. “Do you like it that way? Temporary?”

  Elle realized she was holding her breath when her lungs ached from the exercise of using the rolling pin.