Meow or Never

by Jazz Taylor

  Harper asked me to meet her here, and I hope that means she found something about Phantom. Well, I say hope, but I really don’t know. Phantom’s so cute, playing with the toy mouse I finally got her. I’m aching to just keep her with me forever.

  “Avery?” Harper calls.

  “Back here!”

  Harper appears, poking her head behind the curtain cautiously. I wave at her, and she comes to my side. “Coast is clear! Ready to begin Operation Find the Cat’s Owner?”

  “What exactly are we doing?”

  “So I was thinking—Phantom is here at lunchtime and just after school, right? Maybe that’s because she knows you’re here at those times. But she probably leaves after that.”

  “Okay … where does she go?”

  “Let’s find out. If we pretend to leave, we can spy on her and see where she goes.” Harper leans down and pets Phantom. “We’re leaving! See you later.”

  “Bye, Phantom.” I pet her too. She purrs and rubs her face against my legs. I don’t want to leave, but I pack up and put my backpack on. Phantom trots into her closet and flops onto her bed. I close the door, and Harper and I walk slowly off the stage. But as soon as we’re out of the theater, we race to the back of it.

  “There’s the hole,” I whisper, crouching behind a bush. It’s hidden behind the air conditioner, so I guess no one noticed it. “How long do you think it’ll take her to come out?”

  “I have no idea. We just have to wait.”

  Harper and I stare at the hole intently for a few minutes, but Phantom doesn’t come out. “Do you think she’s taking a nap?”

  “Maybe,” Harper says, doubt in her voice. “I’m sorry. I thought this would work.”

  “It’s okay. Cats have minds of their own.”

  “Yeah.” Harper laughs a little, but it’s nervous. “I don’t really know that much about cats.”

  “Same here! I just think they’re cute. We can’t have pets because of my brother.”

  “I can’t have pets either,” Harper says. “But it’s because it’s not, er, practical.”

  Not practical? What does that mean? I don’t get a chance to ask though, because I see a pair of fuzzy gray ears poke out of the school.

  “There she is!” Harper and I jump to our feet as Phantom emerges from the hole. She stretches, then trots away, the opposite direction of my house. Harper nods, her face determined. “Let’s follow her.”

  Phantom leads us down three streets. She stops at an old apartment building to sniff at the dumpster but keeps moving after a few minutes. She also stops to hiss at a weenie dog barking behind a chain-link fence. She sits right next to the fence and starts cleaning her whiskers.

  “Your cat’s kinda mean,” Harper says, laughing as the dog barks ferociously and claws at the fence.

  “She’s just teasing,” I say, but I’m laughing too. Harper and I wait for several minutes in silence, but Phantom is lounging now, eyes closed while the dog tries to tear the fence down. “Hey, what’d you mean about pets not being practical?”

  Harper fidgets a little. She doesn’t look at me. “It’s kinda complicated.”

  “Oh, sorry,” I say quickly. Did I say something wrong? Am I ruining it? “I won’t ask again.”

  “It’s okay,” Harper says. “It’s just that my mom …” She trails off, looking behind me. “I think she’s getting ready to move.”

  I turn around in time to see a woman come out of the house and yell at the barking dog. Phantom gets up and trots away. We follow her for a few more minutes until she reaches a pretty blue house with a big FOR SALE sign in the front yard. Phantom slips between a gap in the front steps and disappears. We wait, but she doesn’t come out again.

  “Do you think she lives here?” Harper asks me.

  “Lived, maybe?” I point at the sign. “Looks empty.”

  “Hey, do you kids know the Romans?”

  I turn in alarm as an old lady from next door peeks over her fence at us. I struggle for words, but Harper rescues me.

  “No, ma’am. We were wondering if anyone still lived here.”

  The old lady shakes her head. “Moved out two months ago. Not very nice people. I hope someone nicer moves in. Are you interested?”

  I shake my head, and Harper laughs. “No, we’re just passing by. Actually, we were looking for a cat. Have you seen it? It’s gray and kinda fat.”

  The lady nods. “Yes, I’ve seen that thing around. Can’t stand it, chases all my birds away! But I do feel a little sorry for it. The Romans left the poor thing behind when they moved.”

  Well, that answers that. We thank the old lady and leave, headed back to school.

  “What do we do now?” I ask Harper when we’re safely away from the old lady. “Phantom doesn’t have an owner. I can’t believe they’d leave her.” I hate to leave Phantom in that big empty house, but I guess she’s been fine for two months.

  “I know! People are horrible.” Harper crosses her arms and looks up at the sky. “I guess she’s your cat now, right? You’re already taking care of her.”

  Joy overwhelms me. She really is my cat now. “Yeah. I guess she is.”

  “But we shouldn’t tell anyone,” Harper says as the school comes into view. “Even Nic.”

  Why not? I mean, I get why we wouldn’t tell Mrs. Thompson or an adult, but why Nic specifically? Harper seemed kinda uneasy around Nic … But I don’t want to ask her about it. It can be our secret for now. “Okay. Deal.”

  Harper and I say goodbye. I check my phone, and my stomach drops. It’s already four thirty! And I’m supposed to go to Nic’s! I shoulder my backpack and wave to Harper. “See you tomorrow!”

  She smiles. “See ya.”

  I hesitate outside Nic’s door. I ran all the way here in a panic, but now I’m nervous. I already texted Dad and told him I’d be at Nic’s though, so I can’t chicken out. Still, I’m sweaty again, and Andrew calling Nic my girlfriend won’t leave my head.

  Okay, Avery. Be cool. You can do this. I try to breathe deeply, but my lungs aren’t cooperating. I settle for a half breath and ring Nic’s doorbell.

  Noodle immediately starts barking. There’s some cursing, and then Nic’s mom answers the door, holding Noodle’s collar. She’s visibly shocked to see me. “Oh, Avery! What’re you—”

  “Is that Avery?” Nic thunders down the stairs and appears behind her mom. She grins at me. “Hey! Sorry, Mom, forgot to tell you Avery was coming over. Come in!”

  Nic’s mom moves to the side so I can get in. She looks exasperated. “Nic, I told you to let me know when you have friends over. The house is a wreck—”

  “We’ll be in my room!” Nic tugs at my hand and pulls me inside.

  I nod weakly to Nic’s mom and let Nic rush me upstairs. Noodle follows at our heels, panting.

  “Where were you?” Nic asks when we’re safely in her room. She closes her door, muffling the sound of heavy bass coming from the next room. “It’s five o’clock!”

  “I hang out after school sometimes,” I say. I almost tell her about Phantom, but I hold it in. Harper asked me not to tell, and I won’t. Though I’m dying to tell Nic. She’d love something like this.

  Nic accepts my explanation with a nod. “Okay, let’s get to work! Did you bring your script?”

  We run through our lines in act 2 and 3. I’m comfortable with them now, I think. They’re familiar at least. Maybe I could read out loud in class finally?

  “That was really good!” Nic says as we finish reading. “Now, I know we’ve been just saying the song lyrics, but maybe we should sing them.”

  I shake my head, panic clawing up my throat. “I … I can’t.”

  “Not even with Noodle?”

  I look at Noodle, who’s been chewing on a plastic bone. She looks at me, licking her whiskers. “I don’t think so.”

  “Hmm.” Nic taps her finger on the back of her script. “How’d you sing in front of Mrs. Thompson?”

  “She let me close my eyes.”


  “That’s not gonna work. You can’t do the whole play with your eyes closed.”

  My lungs are getting that can’t-breathe feeling. She’s right, I can’t do this with my eyes closed. I can’t sing in front of an audience. I’ll pass out. I’ll die. Dad will be so disappointed.

  “Avery?” Nic leans closer, her expression anxious. “You okay? You don’t look so good.”

  “I’m okay,” I gasp. My lungs are closing up. I close my eyes and focus on breathing and the exercise Nurse Biles makes me do. I can’t do sight right now. Three things I can touch it is.

  “Noodle,” I mutter, running my hands through her fur. “My jeans. Carpet.”

  The panic subsides enough so I can breathe again. Tentatively, I open my eyes again. Nic’s close, almost too close, watching my face anxiously.

  “Was that a panic attack?” she asks, her voice hushed.

  “Almost.” I give her a wobbly smile. “Caught it in time.”

  Nic seems relieved. She sits back down, her arms crossed. “Well, no singing for now. Let’s get something to eat, and we can try again later.”

  My stomach drops at the thought of trying to sing again, but I nod anyway. My legs are a little shaky when I stand, but hopefully Nic doesn’t notice.

  We go downstairs, and Nic marches to the kitchen. A little kid’s doing his homework at the counter, but his eyes light up when he sees Nic.

  “Can I play on your phone?” he asks.

  “Get lost,” Nic growls. She turns to me, rolling her eyes. “This is Eric, my monster of a little brother. Better watch your phone. He’ll grab it.”

  “Hi,” he says to me, his voice dripping with sweetness. “What’s your name? You shouldn’t be Nic’s friend. She’s mean—”

  “Dad,” Nic bellows. “Can you get Eric out of here? Please?”

  “He was there first,” Nic’s dad calls from somewhere in the living room. Eric sticks his tongue out at Nic.

  Nic looks like she’ll explode at any minute. I can’t help but laugh. I’ve never seen Nic frustrated before. She’s cool and kind at school, but it’s nice to see this side too.

  “Fine. You can play for ten minutes if you’ll leave. Then I’m coming to get it.” Nic gives Eric her phone, and he runs upstairs, abandoning his homework. She turns to me, shaking her head. “I have got to get out of this madhouse. Do you like popcorn?”

  “Yeah.” I sit at the counter, next to Eric’s homework. “Can I have some water too?”

  “Sure!” Nic pops some popcorn for us in the microwave and brings me a glass of water. She sits next to me, shoving Eric’s homework out of the way. She takes a few pieces of popcorn and sighs. “Do you ever think of running away from home?”

  I smile and take a piece. It’s sweet—kettle corn. “I used to. But Andrew’s been kinda cool lately. It’s weird.”

  “If only!” Nic sighs again, extra dramatic.

  I watch her out of the corner of my eye. Nic’s staring into her water glass, her eyes far away. She’s pretty up close, but she has a tiny scar near her ear, and the beginnings of a pimple by her nose. I don’t know why, but it makes me like her a little more. Andrew’s words reverberate through my head, and I look back at my own water glass.

  “Do you think practicing in the morning before school helps?” Nic asks after we’ve eaten almost all the popcorn.

  I’m reminded of Harper. I wonder what Nic’s feelings are. And Harper was adamant about us not telling her about Phantom. Is there something going on between them I don’t know about? She’s in a better mood, her eyes bright and happy. Maybe I can ask now. “Yeah, but … can I ask you something?”

  “Anything.” Nic leans closer, like we’re about to share a secret.

  “What do you think about Harper?”

  Nic’s eyes widen a little. She leans back, a frown replacing her smile. Uh oh. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked.

  “Sorry,” I say quickly, “I was just curious since she’s been walking with us and helping me out.”

  “No, it’s okay!” Nic says. She picks at the edge of the counter, not looking at me. “I think she’s pretty cool.”

  She doesn’t sound like she thinks that. “But?”

  “There’s no but.” Nic hesitates, and then continues. “Okay, maybe a little but. I was just surprised that you were friends with her.”

  “Why?”

  “Well, I mean, you have such a hard time talking …”

  “Oh.” I feel a stab of pain. Does Nic think I’m that pathetic? Well, I guess I am, but still. I guess I was hoping she wouldn’t notice I was hopeless at making friends.

  “Sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.” Nic looks anxious now. “I’m glad you’re friends with her! And I really do think she’s cool. She’s got this intense artist vibe.”

  That pulls a smile out of me. “Yeah, that’s true. I can’t believe she wrote that play all by herself.”

  “Right?” Nic looks wistfully at the refrigerator. “I wish I had a talent like that.”

  What’s she talking about? She’s a really great actress. Even when we’re running through our lines, she’s acting things out and her inflection is perfect. She doesn’t have to struggle to get into character. And she can sing really great too. Who cares if she’s an alto? Mrs. Thompson, I guess, but that’s not fair. I open my mouth to tell her all this, but Nic’s mom pops her head into the kitchen.

  “Avery, your dad is here to pick you up.”

  Dang it, Dad. I look at Nic, and she gives me a thumbs-up. “We’ll practice the songs next time, okay?”

  “Okay.” I get my backpack from her room and meet Dad at the door. He rumples my hair when he sees me.

  “Did you have fun?”

  I look back at Nic, who waves. I wave back, my chest not as light as normal. Does Nic secretly think I’m weird because I don’t have many friends? Does she think I’m hopeless? Does she just feel sorry for me, and that’s why she was shocked about Harper? I look back at Dad, trying to put it out of my mind.

  “Yeah. I did.”

  I buy two sandwiches today.

  One is for Phantom, as usual. But I think Harper would like to have more than a fruit cup. I’m not that hungry, so she can have the sandwich, if she wants it. I hope she likes turkey.

  It’s been a few days since I went to Nic’s house. The weird way Harper and Nic acted the morning they met, and the conversation I had with Nic about it, has been nagging at me all week. Nic said she was surprised I had friends (which is still ouch), but Harper acted strange too. I’m gonna ask Harper about it. She’ll be honest with me, I’m sure. But the problem is, do I want to know the answer?

  I run from the lunchroom as quick as I can, before Amberleigh and Emily notice me. And Nic too. The “weird” comment still stings, and I don’t want to think about how Nic feels about me. I go to the back of the theater, and Phantom meets me, meowing and purring.

  “Okay, okay, turkey time. I know.” I take off the bread and feed her the lunch meat. Her sharp teeth graze my fingertips as she gobbles it down. “Hey, chill! You’re gonna take my fingers off.”

  Phantom responds by climbing into my lap and purring. I scratch behind her ears, and she closes her eyes. Her fur’s dirtier than usual. She needs a bath, bad.

  “Do you think Nic really wants to be my friend?” Phantom blinks sleepily at me. “Oh, you haven’t met Nic. She’s really cool. Way cooler than me. But she said she was surprised Harper was my friend. Hurt my feelings, even if it was true.”

  Phantom yawns. I guess she’s not interested in my problems. “Well, what about you? What were your old owners like?” I ask her. “Were they mean to you? I hope not. But you’re safe now, don’t worry.”

  Phantom presses her paws against my legs, still purring. I wait for the pinpricks from her claws, but I don’t feel them. I hold up one of her front paws and push the soft pad underneath. No claws pop out.

  “Ugh, they declawed you and left you alone?! If I see them, I’ll fight
them.”

  “Who’re you fighting?” Harper appears from behind the curtain. I never hear her coming. She’d be a great spy.

  “Phantom’s owners. Look.” I pick Phantom up and show Harper Phantom’s paws. “They declawed her!”

  Harper sits next to me. She doesn’t have a lunch again. “Is that bad?”

  “Yeah! She can’t catch food by herself anymore. She’ll starve if we don’t feed her.”

  Harper pokes Phantom’s big belly. Phantom opens her eyes and nuzzles her face against Harper’s hand. “I think we have some time before that happens.”

  I can’t help but laugh. I don’t know why anyone would leave her, especially if they liked her enough to feed her so much. But, even though it’s kind of terrible, I’m secretly glad the Romans did, so I could find her.

  “Oh, Harper, speaking of food …” I pull out Harper’s sandwich and fruit cup, and give it to her. “Do you like turkey?”

  Harper’s eyes widen. “You don’t have to give me that.”

  “I know, but I’m not that hungry.”

  “Well, you gotta eat something.” Harper crosses her arms. “I won’t take all your food.”

  Hmm. “I have this.” I show her Phantom’s leftover sandwich, which is soggy white bread and no turkey.

  Harper doesn’t look too happy but accepts the turkey sandwich and fruit cup anyway. “You’re really just eating bread?”

  “I like bread,” I lie, taking a bite out of the leftovers. Somehow the lingering turkey taste makes it worse.

  “Man,” Harper says, laughing as she opens the fruit cup. “You are weird.”

  I freeze in the middle of biting my two pieces of bread. Not Harper too. No, I’m sure she’s kidding. She laughed. I force myself to swallow the dry bread, but I’m not hungry. “Hey, Harper, do you really think I’m weird?”

  “For eating two pieces of bread as a sandwich? Yeah.”

  “No, I mean …” I struggle to put my thoughts into words. “I mean, like, in general.”

  Harper finishes the fruit cup and starts on the sandwich. “Someone’s been making fun of you, huh?” When I don’t answer, she continues. “You’re not weird. You just have anxiety. So what? Can’t change it, can you?”