I Fell in Love with a Zombie

by Sean Kennedy

  “We didn’t know there was anybody here,” I said calmly, my hands still in the air. “We were just coming—”

  “To steal from me!” The gun was waving wildly.

  The sweat just wouldn’t stop pouring off me. “Not to steal! We didn’t even know there was anybody here. There are so few people left—”

  “Well, those who are left keep using my farm as a thoroughfare,” the farmer spat.

  Wait, what? “You’ve seen others?”

  The dog sat its heavy rump on the ground, panting. The farmer didn’t take the gun sight off us.

  “Crazy convoy of hippies. Have huge plans of barricading a big city and starting a new civilization. Some of them claimed they were from the government. Pretty uncoordinated for a government, if you ask me.”

  “How many?” I asked.

  “’Bout fifty. They said there were more, though. Coming from other directions. They can all keep each other.”

  “Did they say what city?”

  His eyes narrowed. “You ask too many questions. Just like them. Get off my land!”

  As his tone became more hysterical, I could feel Dave becoming more agitated behind me. I felt sorry for the old man, though. Maybe being left alone had caused him to become more unhinged. This could have been me if I had stayed in my house and never moved on.

  “Okay,” I said soothingly. “We’re going!”

  “Get!” he screamed.

  Dave growled.

  The man jumped back, the sudden realization of what Dave was crossing his features. As he jumped, the gun went off and a bullet kicked the dirt at my feet. I yelled out, only in fear because I hadn’t actually been hit. But this only increased Dave’s anger.

  “You’re with one of… them!” the farmer hissed.

  “He’s not like the others!” I said, stepping backward until I felt Dave against my back so I knew exactly where he was. “I promise you!”

  “It’s unnatural! What has this world come to?”

  “I don’t know!” I said honestly.

  “What next? Are you like one of those animal nuts? Are you People for the Ethical Treatment of Zombies?”

  Now he was a comedian?

  “Look, we’re going. Just calm down.”

  “Don’t you tell me what to do!”

  Dave growled and reached around me. I held him back, but it was getting impossible. “Dave! No! Let’s just go!”

  There must have been something in the way I was looking at Dave, or the way Dave was trying to defend me, but it signaled our closeness.

  “Fuck me,” our friend said. “A fag, and a fag zombie. You’re like the high end of unnatural. “ He trained the gun back on us. “The world has been cleansed, boys! But I guess I have to tie up some loose ends!”

  “He’ll kill you before you kill us,” I warned him. “Just put the gun down, and we’ll go on our way, and you can just go back to your house. There’s no need for this!”

  “Too late for that—”

  Dave shoved me aside, and I sprawled in the dirt. I heard the gun go off again, but straightaway there was the bloodcurdling scream from the farmer. The gun fell in the dirt before me, splattered in blood. I could see the dog stagger to its feet, and I didn’t want it to get in the killing zone.

  “Here!” I commanded it.

  It lurched forward, but stopped when a fine arc of blood hit its coat. Confused, it looked up. The screams had become gurgles, and the body thumped to the ground. The farmer stared at me with his open, but unseeing, eyes. The remains of his throat continued to lose blood and stain the sand around him.

  I just lay there. I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want to acknowledge what happened. But, the dog—

  “Dave,” I croaked.

  I could hear him panting, but he wasn’t moving. I watched the dog warily, but it remained where it was.

  “Dave.”

  He moaned my name and moved toward me.

  I stood, and surveyed the carnage around us. Dave was covered in blood, and strips of skin were beneath his fingernails. Unlike the last time I saw him kill, I didn’t vomit. I picked up the gun and began walking up to the farmhouse.

  “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

  I whistled at the dog, and it started following us at its slow pace.

  XI

  I FELT weirder about being in the farmer’s house than any other house I had invaded in the weeks after the virus. Probably because his body was still lying on the dirt track, and I had interacted with him before he died. Oh, and contributed to his murder. Nobody deserved that fate, but neither did we. Neither did the zombies. We should all be living our lives as we had been, the apocalypse being something only watched in movies or threatened by zealots.

  The dog grew quickly accustomed to our presence. I found out she was a female, and she was nameless, as she didn’t have a collar. There was nothing in the house like vet bills to let us know, so I ended up calling her Harriet. The new name seemed to confuse her, but she took it in her stride.

  The farmhouse actually had warm water, thanks to a generator. Unfortunately, it only seemed to be connected to the water heater and not the rest of the power. But warm water at the twist of a tap was a luxury.

  But they were things that were found out later. As soon as we first stepped into the farmhouse, I tried hard to ignore the pictures on the wall, obviously of the farmer and his wife taken decades before. There was nobody else in the house; he must have been a widower. That only added to my guilt.

  I had to get Dave cleaned up. We found the bathroom and stripped him down. I shoved the bloody clothes in the hamper, knowing we’d never touch them again. Once Dave was underneath the shower was when we discovered the water was warm. Dave groaned in pleasure, even as the water ran pink at his feet.

  The lure of a warm shower was too much for me. I stripped out of my clothes, and threw them in the hamper as well. The farmer surely would have clothes we could take.

  But something made me stop before I pushed the curtain aside fully. I looked down at the blood swirling around the drain, made innocuous and innocently pink by the water. My old fears of contagion returned. What was I doing? Was I setting myself up for unnecessary risk?

  I tried to think logically. I had been exposed to zombie blood a few times now, thanks to the death and destruction wrought by them and upon them. Nothing had changed me—and I knew from experience that the zombies had changed quickly when all this had started. If I had been infected, I would have been like Dave long before now.

  Was it something in my blood that made me resistant?

  I had no idea, and maybe I would never know. But I figured I was safe by now.

  I pulled the curtain aside, and the plastic hooks striking the railing were loud, even above the noise of the shower.

  “Shove over,” I said to Dave.

  He looked at me with surprise, then down at me. It was the first time he had seen me naked in years. I felt a little self-conscious, knowing that I now had a little bit of belly where before there was none and my chest definitely wasn’t as defined as it used to be. My gym pass had been given up long ago.

  But there was a glimmer in his eyes, something new that I hadn’t seen in the time we had been reunited. It looked a hell of a lot like desire.

  I felt something shift against my hip; looking down, I saw his cock at half-mast, grazing my skin.

  The heat from the shower wasn’t the only heat that was building. I had to drive away all the thoughts in my head that were telling me to get out, to not take this moment any further, but I had to know. I took Dave’s face in my hands and peered into his eyes. If they were truly the windows into the soul, they should tell me what I had to know.

  “Dave,” I whispered, not even knowing if I could be heard above the sound of the streaming water. “Are you really in there?”

  His movements were still jerky as his hands traveled up my back and pulled me against him. Flush against his chest, I didn’t, and couldn’t, move away as hi
s lips closed over mine.

  It was all the answer I needed. Dave might not be well, but whatever this virus had done to him and to all the others who had been affected, they were all still themselves. There was still love, and desire, and need. I parted my lips to let him in, to reclaim him.

  Mike couldn’t help but cross my mind. Neither of us could have ever foreseen this, though, and I hoped he forgave me for everything I was doing within such a short time from his death.

  I ran my hand down Dave’s chest, my thumb rubbing his nipple. Dave had always liked that, and his response to it only served to remind me that he was still the Dave I had known.

  I wasn’t ready for full intimacy; my experience with Richard had made me shy of it for now. But I took us both in hand, and Dave shuddered against me as I brought us to a quick and shared climax.

  I continued to hold him until the water grew cold.

  XII

  BY DEFAULT, the farmhouse turned into a new home. There didn’t seem to be any zombies in the immediate area, as the farmer’s continued presence in the one place for so long seemed to attest.

  It turned out his name was Fred Huegel. A bill for grain stuck to the fridge told us that.

  I buried his body. I didn’t want to see Fred lying face-down every day from the sitting room window, and I thought he deserved a proper resting place despite the fact he had tried to kill us. Harriet accompanied me while Dave watched from the window.

  In our second week in the farmhouse, a helicopter flew over the grounds. The thumping of the blades was such a foreign sound that we didn’t even know what it was at first, and by the time I realized and ran outside, it was long gone.

  Maybe it was for the best. Who knew what they would have done to Dave?

  We had settled back into an easy coupledom. We may not have been the most traditional of couples, but he was starting to remember a few more words, although it seemed to take a lot out of him. Maybe there was some way back from this. As we lay in bed together at night, he slept soundly while I lay awake and tried to figure out how I could make him better.

  “Maybe we should move on again,” I said to him one morning.

  He looked at me as if he thought it was the stupidest idea ever.

  “I know we’re comfortable here,” I told him. “But remember what Fred said? There are people out there, who are banding together. Some from the government. Maybe we should find them.”

  Dave concentrated hard. I could see him trying to find the word, but I was impatient.

  “Because maybe if we do, they’re trying to figure out how to fix things. Maybe even a cure.”

  It was a long shot. Maybe their idea of a cure was eradication of the problem. But I had to believe in something, and finding Dave had taught me that. I had been bitter and lost until he saved me, but something had brought us back together after all these years. Was it just coincidence that had led me to Drake? That Dave should still be there, and be the one who seemed to have that little more of a spark than other zombies? That he saved me?

  There had to be more to everything.

  I kissed him. “I know it’s dangerous. But I wouldn’t do this to us if I didn’t think there was a chance.”

  This time, he kissed me. It was his way of assenting.

  “We don’t have to go straight away,” I said. “We can hide out here for a while.”

  After all, we had supplies. We had fuel. We had each other.

  But in the end, the decision was made for us. Over a week later, we were lying in bed. Harriet was at the foot of it, as she found it too difficult with her age to get upon the blankets. I had rigged her a basket with an entrance at floor level so she wouldn’t have to climb that high. I was drifting off to sleep, listening to her snuffling, when the room was suddenly bathed with light.

  Squinting, I was considering bizarre theories such as the return of the helicopter, now floating outside our window and shining its beams in, but I quickly realized the bedroom light was on.

  We had power.

  I could hear the static of white noise coming from a radio somewhere. But when we went downstairs the television was also on, broadcasting to an empty room.

  “How the hell did the power come back?” I asked, rhetorically, seeing as Dave couldn’t answer and I had no idea what was going on.

  I was about to turn off the TV when the static switched to a black screen with a card that said Stand by for broadcast.

  “What the fuck,” I breathed.

  But I was excited. This was the first word we had had from the outside world that it still existed. Power, television… was our world coming back to us?

  I felt Dave shuffle behind me and sit down. Harriet came beside me, and I scratched her ears.

  The card disappeared, and a woman with honey-colored skin appeared.

  “Hello,” she said, clearly and pleasantly. “I am Teresa Albano. This is a message for the survivors of this nation. We offer hope, in letting you know that although our situation was tough for some time, we are now regrouping and forming a provisional government. We have set up a home base in the city of Arkana—”

  Dave moaned excitedly, reminding me that Arkana was not that far from where we were. That was obviously why we had power now.

  “—and we invite all surviving citizens to join us there. We have restored power, and the city is barricaded to protect us from the threat of those affected by the virus. We are also working on a solution for the catastrophe that has befallen us. Arkana is the first step to restoring our country to the glory it was before. We hope you will join us here. This message will be repeated every hour on the hour, on all television and radio frequencies. For those who are listening, good luck, and keep your spirits high.”

  Teresa smiled at us, and the card telling us to stand by returned.

  I turned to look at Dave. “She said all citizens.”

  Dave groaned, but he didn’t sound very optimistic.

  “We can’t stay here forever,” I reminded him. “What if we just give it a try? If it goes bad, we just move on. We’re going to have to move on eventually anyway.”

  Dave’s arm shook as he reached out to me.

  I walked over to him and took his hand. “We’re in this together.”

  He grunted his agreement.

  Epilogue

  WE LOADED up Fred’s dusty old station wagon the next morning with food, fuel canisters, and Harriet’s bed. Even though it would be a short drive to Arkana, we had to be prepared just in case we were met with hostility. We needed enough provisions to get us a safe distance beyond our hopeful safe harbor if it came to that.

  I helped Harriet into the back seat, and she took to her bed with her tail wagging happily. I shut the door and looked at Dave. He was leaning against the front passenger door, seemingly apprehensive.

  “Ready?” I asked.

  He nodded slowly.

  “Hey,” I said, taking him into my arms. “No matter what happens, I’m with you. No matter where it ends up taking us. Now let’s see where we’re going.”

  He pulled back, and I smiled at him reassuringly. I hope I got it across, because I was just as nervous.

  The exhaust backfired as we drove down the track away from the farmhouse, over the patch where Fred would now lie for the rest of time. I hoped our future would be somewhat more cheery.

  Back on the open road, the car struggled to reach the speed limit. The road stretched out, as long and as empty as it had been before. But now there was hope. It was better than what we had before.

  As my hand rested on the gear stick, Dave’s rested upon it. It trembled slightly, but it gave me strength.

  We drove on into the unknown, Harriet snoring gently from the back seat.

  SEAN KENNEDY lives in Perth, Western Australia, but his heart still belongs to his hometown Melbourne—which is also the home of Simon Murray and Declan Tyler from his series Tigers and Devils. A disciple of cult leader David Lynch, Sean is breathlessly awaiting the revival of Twin Peaks i
n 2016.

  Website: www.seankennedybooks.com

  By Sean Kennedy

  Australian Christmas in New York

  With Catt Ford: Dash and Dingo

  I Fell in Love with a Zombie

  Ports of Call

  Protests and Proposals

  Secret Santa

  Wings of Equity

  TIGERS AND DEVILS

  Tigers and Devils

  Tigerland

  Tigers on the Run

  Published by Harmony Ink Press

  GET OUT

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  Micah Johnson Goes West

  The Obstruction of Emma Goldsworthy

  Published By DREAMSPINNER PRESS

  www.dreamspinnerpress.com

  Published by

  DREAMSPINNER PRESS

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  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of author imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  I Fell in Love with a Zombie

  © 2010 Sean Kennedy.

  Cover Art

  © 2010 Catt Ford.

  Cover content is for illustrative purposes only and any person depicted on the cover is a model.

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