Murder, Magic, and Moggies

by Pearl Goodfellow

  Ravena held up her hand. “Please, remember what I said about not being certain about this. I will be glad to keep testing these samples and forwarding my results to any party you deem qualified to make these judgment calls. But I'm not willing to speculate any further about what it all may mean.”

  “Well, seeing as we're here for something completely different,” David said with a sigh. “Can we change tack here and get onto what we came for?" The Chief ran a shaky hand through his white-streaked hair. "I believe there's something else you can help us with regarding Millicent’s case.”

  I felt a wave of relief inside. Whatever had just happened, it hadn’t interfered with David’s innate cop-like ways. I backed him up. “Actually, I wanted to take a look at Millicent’s maps again. I saw them briefly last time I was here, but I wasn't paying attention. There was something written on them that I think can help us.” I gave Ravena an imploring look.

  Ms. Valley looked confused for a second, and then realizing what we were asking of her, she replied; “Of course…but what—“

  “It’s a hunch,” I said, holding up my hand. “Maybe it’s nothing. But the only way to be sure is if we take a look.”

  “They’re in her study. She kept them on the bottom bookshelf behind the desk. I’ve meant to…”

  Gloom suddenly started purring again and rubbing against her. I smiled inwardly. My abrasive kitty could show such kindness. She knew that Ravena was about to crack up with raw emotion again. The sad woman seemed grateful for the kitty distraction and immediately lightened a little. “You can find the study just outside this door to the right.” Gloom nestled closer to Ravena, even allowing the latter to scratch her on her back close to her tail. A giant 'no-no' in Gloom's picky world. And, yet, my kitty kept purring and rubbing against the bereft Ms. Valley offering warm and furry consolation.

  Five minutes later, we were halfway through Millicent’s maps when Gloom came tip-toeing in. Before anyone could say anything, she declared;

  “Not one word to anybody about what I did for Ms. Einstein today, got it?” Her head turned from me to David to Onyx, and then on each of us again in the opposite direction, checking our understanding. “Especially Midnight,” she finished.

  “But of course,” Onyx replied, amusement just right behind his politeness. “You, after all, have a reputation to maintain, dear sister.”

  “Onyx…” I warned.

  “Did Dr. Valley say anything else about my test results?” David asked, not looking up from the maps as we picked over the next one.

  Gloom snorted. “Like I’d have understood a word of it if she had.”

  David nodded, but he looked troubled by that statement. It was obvious that whatever was going on with him had him shaken. And, I suspected it had been going on for a while. Whatever 'it' was. The weird streak in his hair, the fact that he managed to not get shocked during Maude’s little demonstration, his utter enchantment with Ms. Falk…all troubling signs of something he, as yet, refused to share. What was so troublesome that he thought he had to keep it from me?

  The question got tabled when I happened upon what I was looking for. It was a map of the section of Glimmer Mountains that towered above where Millicent had died. The writing on it was every bit as screwy as I remembered, but one phrase jumped right out at me: “THUC SIN DARN ECOS.” I started tapping the strange words with my pointer.

  “What language is that, Spanish?” David asked, giving it a closer look.

  “I regret to say, Chief Trew, that I find it just as unfamiliar myself,” Onyx said.

  Gloom didn’t bother to chime in, having already settled into a corner of the room for a nap. Displaying such unguarded affection took its toll on her, it seemed.

  I pulled out my enchanted notepad and asked David, “Borrow your pen a minute?”

  David was befuddled but complied. I activated the Authoria charm on the pad, and every phrase on the map started showing up, double-spaced, on the charmed paper. It only took a couple of page flips for all of the nonsensical words to be recorded, but I kept jumping back to the letters that seemed so familiar to me. Just then, the phrase from my dream leaped right to the forefront of my brain, “HIC SUNT DRACONES.” I wrote it underneath THUC SIN DARN ECOS and started matching up the letters.

  Within a minute, I had a complete match of every letter in both phrases. I lowered the notepad to show Onyx and David the results.

  “So it was an anagram,” David deduced. “You certainly seemed to connect the dots on this pretty fast. Had you seen these letters before?” I didn't mention my dream, given that it appeared so un-scientific. The last thing this investigation needed was any more confounding elements. Luckily, I didn't need to.

  “The other night at the town hall, there were antique maps hanging on the walls,” I explained, tapping the translation with the pen. “One of them was of Cathedral -- specifically, the Glimmer Mountains terrain, and it had this phrase in the area of Burning Peak,” I said, referencing Cathedral's most towering peak.

  “I’m still a little lost on how you knew that Millicent would have a map of this area,” David admitted.

  “Along with your new white streak, you can thank Violet for that,” I said with a playful grin. “Before Millicent took her hair coloring in her own hands, Violet had mentioned that Millicent had been fiddling around with the maps while Violet had tried to work on her cut and dye. She said Millicent was disrespecting of her 'art' by looking at pictures of stupid big hills while she was creating her latest masterpiece. "'Limpid Lagoon' was the last color makeover she got." I finished matter of factly.

  David looked back at the map. “Pretty clever…she even took the extra step to break it up into four words to throw people off the scent.”

  “Yes, very clever, indeed,” Onyx said with admiration. “But what a peculiar turn of phrase it translates as: ‘Here Be Dragons’.”

  Another piece of the puzzle clicked in my mind as Onyx said this. “And according to the old Nanker folklore, where do dragons traditionally live?”

  Gloom snorted from her corner. “Duh. Caves, of course." Specifically mountain caves.

  Chapter 13

  We said our goodbyes to our host, Dr. Valley, and were mounting our brooms when my cell rang. I recognized the bell ringtone it was from The Angel’s shop phone. My stomach dropped into my shoes as I picked up.

  “What’s wrong, Millie?” I asked by way of greeting. In my absence from the apothecary, my very competent assistant always handled all the shop's affairs with such aplomb that it worried me when she felt the need to call.

  “Carbon’s getting worse,” my assistant said on the other end. “I don’t know what to do anymore, Hattie. I’ve tried every herb I can think of, and he’s just getting ... well, really wobbly, you know?“ Her voice cracked, and I could hear my poor associate struggle with what sounded like some pretty cumbersome breaths.

  “Breathe, Millie,” I crooned. “We’re just getting done here. I’ll be at the shop in a few short minutes.” I tried to sound confident, in control.

  “Please hurry, okay?”

  I promised I'd be fast, and hung up, letting out an unconscious sigh. David raised an eyebrow.

  “Carbon’s still not recovered from all that weird juice he was zapped with at Maude’s,” I explained. “I’m going to need to take him to the vet. Like, now.” I felt a little regret that we wouldn't be able to go and find the spot on the map, but my moggy needed me.

  “And he’s not the only one who needs a check-up,” Gloom said, strolling up to the CPI with a critical eye.

  “I'm all right,” David insisted. “Really.”

  “Famous last words…you want them to be yours, be my guest.”

  David's face pleaded with me.

  “Don’t look at me for salvation,” I said. “I happen to agree with Gloom, for once. You need to see a doctor. So I'd suggest that you take the opportunity while I'm taking Carbon to the vet. We can meet afterward. ”

  David look
ed a little less sure of his previous conviction that he didn't need medical care. He began, “I don’t know…I promised Mari that I’d—yeeeeeeooooow!”

  Gloom retracted her claws and looked up at the Chief.

  “Still smells too much like sour milk for my liking,” she declared, sniffing her upheld paw, her nose wrinkled in evident contempt. “If I were you, I’d be getting to that doctor immediately, as in an hour ago. But, then you humans do seem to revel in being clueless.” My ruthless cat turned her ample posterior to the chief, readying herself to get comfy on my broom.

  “Alright, fine, I’ll see the doctor,” David said, rubbing his ankle where Gloom had pointedly stabbed for his attention.

  “You shouldn’t go alone,” I said, looking directly at my four-legged pessimist.

  Gloom got it right away. “Oh, no, no, no, no—“

  “This is the unfortunate price you pay for showing such uncharacteristic tenderness earlier, my dear sister,” Onyx said. “Unless, of course, you’d like for me to tell Midnight all about that rather impressive cozying up to Dr. Valley that we so recently witnessed?”

  Gloom glared fireballs at Onyx. “This is blackmail," she growled.

  “Indeed it is. But in the name of a very worthy cause, yes?”

  Gloom gave her brother a low hiss. I bit my lower lip to suppress an edgy laugh that was threatening to break free. Gloom looked at my broom and then David’s before finally declaring, “Alright, fine. But if this gets out ....” She wasn't joking.

  Onyx held up his paw, face solemn. “Lemniscate’s honor.”

  Gloom gave him one last lingering stare before jumping silently on the back of David’s broom. I noticed her ears were flat, pressed backward. She was pretty mad, I guess.

  “Are you and I going to have a problem?” David asked, warily eyeing my kitty.

  “Just shut up and fly already, copper,” Gloom snapped.

  CPI Trew gave me an uncertain glance but did just what my severely inconvenienced cat demanded. I waited until they were out of sight before I allowed my nervous laughter to break loose and have a party.

  I was a little surprised that I wasn't met by Anima Minx, my usual vet, at the pet clinic. Instead, I was greeted by Dilwyn Werelamb. He was instructing one of his boy's, Styx, on how to best administer a syringe to a suffering animal. Styx's hands were visibly shaking as he plunged the needle into the stuffed otter they were using for just this purpose.

  “How many times have I told you, son?” Dilwyn said to his son. “You need to breathe. You're not going to hit the target if you're shaking that much. Let your chi flow. Relax.”

  Styx's shoulders bolted up toward his ears in self-defense. "I can't do it when you're watching over me all the time, Dad! Give me some space, why don't you?" I admired Dilywn's patience. His twin, teenage boys were known to be quite the handful, but his commitment to their betterment was evident for everyone to see. I felt nothing but compassion for this frazzled, single-parent father.

  Dilwyn's gray eyes softened, and he murmured to his flustered boy;

  “Alright, then,” he said, noticing me at the counter at the same time. “Go feed and water the animals with your brother.”

  Styx gave a brief, downcast nod and dragged his feet to the back.

  “So, who’s watching the farm while you’re away?” I asked, placing Carbon gently on the counter. The poor chap wobbled uncontrollably on his jittery paws.

  “Oh, I’ve got my farmhands keeping an eye on things while I help Anima out,” Dilwyn explained as he gave Carbon a close look. “She’s on vacation until the end of next week.”

  “And your boys?”

  Dilwyn sighed wearily. “It was either I bring them here with me for the next couple of days—thank Goddess school will be starting soon—or I leave them on the farm to cause some mischief. Last time I left them on the farm, I spent the next three weeks corralling the gold-tufted griffins they let loose.”

  His flat face looked thoughtful as he peered at my sick kitty over the rims of his glasses. “Times like this, I really miss their mother being around.”

  "It must be hard." I offered sincerely. "Here, Dilwyn, you might want to put these on." I handed him the overly-large rubber gloves I had used to bring Carbon here.

  A spark of electricity leaped from Carbon’s claws and made Dilwyn yelp.

  “S-sorry about tha-that, Dilwyn,” Carbon said weakly. “This s-s-stuff keeps coming out of me when I least expect it.” Werelamb grabbed the gloves from me and hastily donned them.

  “Hey, I know it’s nothing you can help, little guy,” Dilwyn told him, playfully rubbing his kitty nose. “How’d it happen?”

  I decided to keep it simple. “We were near some weird electrical discharge, which zapped us both. Carbon’s been going downhill ever since.” I reached for my sickly cat but caught myself before I made contact. I just wanted to comfort him.

  Dilwyn nodded solemnly. “You know, this might just be your lucky day, Hattie. Last week, I was dealing with a case that was a lot like what Midnight’s brother here is dealing with.”

  While he had affection for all my cats, Midnight was Mr. Werelamb’s personal favorite. My gossipy kitty made a point of dropping in on the Werelamb farm on a regular dead-of-night basis for rumor-gathering purposes. The strangely magical creatures on the friendly farmer’s compound made for the best gossips. But Midnight also provided lots of comfort and comic relief to the colorful critters housed there and Dilwyn was grateful for Midnight's good-natured friendship. Mr. Werelamb would often invite him in for a late night snack of rabbit and a chance to get comfy by the fire for a spell while the unusual duo shared stories.

  Dilwyn reached under the counter and rummaged for what felt like minutes. His head finally popped up, and in his hand, he held a bottle of 'Zeus,' a powerful kitty stimulant that was soluble in both water and milk.

  “Give him half of this bottle over the course of three days. Preferably in a place where stray electricity won’t be a problem,” Dilwyn instructed, handing me the Zeus. “Do you have any ironweed you can get ahold of?”

  “What kind would I need?” I asked.

  “Fresh cut,” he said, giving me a critical eye. “It has to be used within the first twenty-four hours for this to work. Place the stalks in a circle around him, and they’ll leach the excess energy out of his system. I’ve got some ironweed back at the farm if—“

  “No, don't trouble yourself, Dilwyn. I actually have a small batch of the fresh variety back at The Angel.”

  “Okay, great. Now, let me think of what you can give him for the general discomfort.”

  He took Carbon off the counter and carried him to the scales in the corner. The levels came in at around 8 lbs. Nodding, Dilwyn said, “Give him some concentrated Valerian tea. That should help him sleep, which'll make him forget he's crackling until you can get the grounding treatment going.”

  “Fantastic,” I said resting a hand on his arm for emphasis. “Thanks so much for your help, Dilwyn. ”

  “Come back and see me if --“

  An almighty crash from the back.

  “Styx!” Dilwyn called out.

  “That was Lye! Stop blaming me for everything!” Styx yelled back, the weight of teenage guilt tugging at his words.

  Dilwyn blew out an exhausted breath. “Those boys are going to be the death of me," he lamented.

  “Guess we’d better settle the bill then,” I said, reaching for my bag.

  “Actually,” Dilwyn said, holding up his hand. “We got a call here yesterday with updated pet insurance information for all your kitties. Premium plan. Hell, you could get your moggies a spa-vacation here under the plan you're covered with!”

  That took me by surprise. “That wasn't me. Who did that?" I felt weirdly violated or watched. Or something.

  “It was Maude Dulgrey,” Dilwyn explained as he tapped some keys on the counter terminal. “She purchased the Supreme Plan policy for all the kitties.”

  I smiled, and re
lief washed over me. Maude was a good egg. I'd had the feeling she'd go above and beyond to make amends for electrifying my heat-loving kitten.

  “Well,” I said. “I won’t say no. Is there any paperwork—“

  Dilwyn shook his head. “It’s all taken care of. Now, I really—“

  Another crash cut him off. “Lye! Styx! What the bejabbers is goin' on --”

  As he hurried away to find out what his twins had broken, trashed or burned, I grabbed Carbon and the bottle of 'Zeus' and left.

  “W-w-will you stay with me, boss lady? Until I fall asleep? I’m a little f-fr-freaked out right now, I won’t lie.”

  Carbon looked at me with imploring, watery eyes. I felt my heart squeezed painfully at the sight of my wretched cat. “My love, Millie’s going to take good care of you, okay? I have to take care of a bit of business, but I’ll be back with you this evening, don’t worry.”

  I paused, wanting to offer more to my needful companion. Then it hit me.

  “And, whaddaya say to no limits on the salmon treats this evening?” I coaxed.

  “No limits? I can eat the whole bag?”

  Yep, that’s all it took for Carbon to forget about my loving attention.

  Chapter 14

  Half an hour later, after dropping Carbon off at The Angel to convalesce, we were on our brooms heading back to Cathedral. Gloom was riding with David. In case you didn't take that in, I'll say it again: Gloom was traveling with David. Enough said, but I just hope you share my amazement at this strange act of intimate loyalty from my otherwise very aloof cat. Fraidy was the companion I was carrying on my besom. The whole way my timorous cat scanned the clear sky for the proverbial bolt from the blue to strike us down.

  Gloom agreed with David’s statement that the magnesium supplements the doctor had prescribed would take care of his mental imbalance.

  "Should take about a week for all his 'fitting' to come to an end, " she confirmed haughtily. For all her griping about how she didn’t want him to ruin my day (and consequently, HER day) by his having another seizure, my grumpy cat was proving to me that she cared. Truly and wholeheartedly cared about David. It warmed my heart at just how warm 'n' fuzzy she could be.