Echoes

by Honor Raconteur

  “Agents.”

  I gave it ten seconds before she got fed up and threw us out.

  To our therapist, Maksohm apologized, “I’m so sorry, give me one minute to straighten this out.”

  I kicked my heels outside of the therapy session in the waiting room. Bannen had spoken to me at length about this therapist, but I wasn’t sure what to make of all his complaints. He didn’t like the idea of therapy to begin with. In fact, he’d mostly agreed for Chi’s sake. He might have given up on the idea too quickly, or he might be valid, and I wasn’t sure at this point which way the wind would fall. I was glad that the boys had agreed to take Maksohm in with them for a group session, at least. My harried team leader had requested that I stay here in the waiting room, nearby, just in case.

  Poor Maksohm. He really caught the short end of the stick when it came to stuff like this. Feeling a little bad, I of course agreed to help him, mostly because I feared that at some point either Chi or Bannen would make a break for it. Not that he was likely doing anything constructive in there, but still. I might need to save the therapist.

  Nora and Emily had chosen to wait with me, mostly to keep me company. We sprawled over the cushioned chairs and couches arranged in a square. Nora seemed to think something else was up, interestingly enough. Nora leaned in, her dark eyes scrutinizing me. “How are you doing, Rena?”

  I heard the slight emphasis on ‘you’ and my fleeting thought to give her a casual ‘fine’ died. She honestly asked as a friend, which deserved an honest response. “I’m doing better, a lot better. With Toh’sellor in a secure facility, I’m not plagued with as many nightmares about it. And the coping techniques Vee taught me help on the nights that are rough. I think it helps, too, that our house is being constructed now. I feel like I’ll have my own home to go to soon.”

  “There’s a certain feeling of displacement when you don’t have a space to call your own,” Emily agreed with a wry face. “You realize that because I’m on your team, and you’re all up in Gargan, that I’m now stationed in Gargan?”

  “You’ll love it,” I promised her faithfully, grinning. “The giants are great fun. They’re awesome neighbors.”

  “I sure hope so, ’cause I’m stuck there regardless.” Emily didn’t sound bothered by this overly much, but then, she’d never been that far north before either. The only time she’d left this continent was for my wedding and the fight with Toh’sellor. Both times she’d only been there a few days before returning to Corcoran. She had no personal experience to judge anything by, and because she was Emily, she was willing to wait until she saw things with her own eyes before coming to any conclusions.

  The door to the waiting room abruptly opened and our harried team leader poked his head inside. “Rena!”

  “And that’s my cue,” I sighed, standing. “I’ll catch up with you two later.”

  They waved me off and I followed Maksohm back into the room. Chi sat cross-legged next to Bannen, arms crossed over his chest defensively, which made his already muscular arms look even larger than usual. There was a smile on his face, as if he weren’t taking anything seriously, but I recognized that hard set to his jaw. It spoke of pure stubbornness and only cemented further as I entered. I took one look at him and had to wonder, what did Clara do to put his back up so badly? Before, he wasn’t inclined to talk, but now he was clammed up tighter than a buried treasure chest. Bannen looked about the same, and the mulish set to his jaw did not promise anything good. They weren’t taking this at all seriously.

  Not sure what to do in this situation, I took the chair next to my husband, angling to focus on him. My first priority lay with Bannen and Chi, not what Clara wanted, and I let him know that silently as I looked at him. He might have relaxed a hair but not enough to actually pry his mouth open and speak. Sarding deities, I might need backup.

  “Agent Maksohm, I repeat,” Clara said in a flat voice, “I do not approve of yet another person joining the group at this time, especially not the person who instigated the trouble to begin with.”

  “I’m sorry, but it’s not possible to straighten this out without her. Rena’s key to the whole thing. Rena,” Maksohm requested in a deliberately neutral tone that I recognized instantly. My ears pricked, as I only heard him speak like that when he didn’t agree with what was being said around him. “Can you please explain why you and Chi ended up in the same bed on the last mission?”

  “I’m not interested in the reasons,” Clara informed us flatly. “There is a certain degree of behavior that is not acceptable. If there was an issue, and Agent Franklocke couldn’t sleep, then he should have been pulled immediately from field duty and sent in for proper treatment.”

  I stared at her, somewhat aghast. My therapist was warm, delightful, and a very excellent listener. Nothing at all like this woman. Did she seriously just say that she wasn’t interested in listening to her patients? “We weren’t in a situation where we could just stop and send Chi home—”

  “Both of these men shouldn’t have been serving,” Clara cut me off, words cold and brutal. “They both have severe cases of PTSD. This will require years of treatment, treatment that was delayed because you were enabling them.”

  Excuse me? I blinked at her, absolutely certain I could not be hearing this correctly. Bannen didn’t have PTSD. He wasn’t exhibiting any of those symptoms except nightmares, and even his anxiety was tied in with the familiar bond more than anything. Had she really just pigeon holed him into a diagnosis after two sessions?

  “You’ll be both ineligible for field service until I sign you off,” Clara informed us all.

  “Yeah,” I said, deliberately borrowing one of my husband’s phrases, “that’s a healthy serving of not happening.”

  Chi snorted, humor flaring in his face for a moment. “That’s a Bannen-ism right there.”

  “Hey, married to the man, been around him for three years, things are going to rub off.” I waggled my eyebrows at Bannen, got him chortling again because of course his mind took that line and went straight to the gutter with it. It lasted three seconds, then his eyes darted to Clara and he went rigid and defensive again.

  Yeah, this wasn’t about him being a pest, or not wanting therapy. He honestly didn’t trust this woman, and nothing I or anyone else said would change that. Being in therapy with someone you couldn’t confide in? Recipe for disaster. After hearing what she’d just said, the assumptions she’d leapt to, I didn’t blame him. I caught Maksohm’s eye and I could tell his patience had evaporated at that point. He saw the question in my eyes, nodded permission, and I took both Bannen and Chi’s hands, pulling them off the couch. “I’m making an executive decision. Sorry, Therapist Clara, but I don’t think you are a good match. They’re not comfortable speaking in front of you and that does no one any good. No offense, but I think we need to try them with someone else.”

  Clara’s expression said she took all the offense. “I beg your pardon, but they have to go through me. They can’t be released for field duty otherwise.”

  “Not quite, there are other methods.” Maksohm gave her a smile that he didn’t at all feel.

  Chi’s hand tightened in mine and I felt bad, because I was set as a watchdog to make him stay in here, and yet his instincts were right. This woman was more interested in checking off boxes than really speaking with him.

  Her pretty eyes hardened to chips of ice. “That is not your call to make, Agent.”

  Wow. Pissy, much? “You’re correct, but our team leader has already made it.” I murmured back from the side of my mouth, “Run for it, guys. I’m right behind you.”

  Both men sped out of the room so fast that air vacuumed in their wake. I turned sharply on my heel, waving a hand over my shoulder as I did so. “Have a good day, Clara.”

  Hopefully I didn’t get us all into a lot of trouble doing that. Even if I had, well. Them’s the breaks.

  I wrapped both arms around my wife and squeezed the stuffing out of her. “I’m so proud of you
.”

  “Why?” Rena answered dryly, a little short on breath, although she readily hugged me back. “Because I broke you and Chi out of therapy?”

  “You’re such a rebel,” I responded happily. “I knew I liked you for a reason.”

  We stood in the training yard, off to the side, because after being glared at for nearly an hour, Chi wanted to blow off some steam. He and Vee were currently tearing up the place, arrows flying all over. Maksohm kept a shield around us so that we didn’t become the victims of friendly fire. Our team leader sat on the bench, one leg drawn up to his chest, and frowned as he watched the pair. His expression did not suggest he thought of happy thoughts.

  Turning in my arms, Rena studied him for a moment before offering, “I didn’t suspect anything either, not at first. I mean, I thought she was only doing her job.”

  “But I should know when to trust their instincts,” Maksohm sighed, sounding a decade older.

  After I’d escaped, Maksohm investigated our former therapist, speaking with numerous agents, and got a few interesting stories about Clara. Turned out there was a reason why she was free when the rest of the therapists were scheduled out for the next four months. She was the type that liked to take people apart just to figure out what made them tick, but wasn’t so good at putting people back together again. I’d sensed something off about her, but I hadn’t been able to put a finger on it. Maksohm and Rena, they might force me to do things for my own good, but they respected my wishes too.

  Now, of course, Maksohm felt bad about shoving things ahead so quickly instead of properly double checking. I didn’t really blame him, though. Why wouldn’t a MISD-approved therapist be a good choice for us? Still, I could practically see the guilt oozing from him.

  Rena did too, as she went and joined him on the bench, putting an arm around his shoulders and hugging him to her. “It’s alright, no damage done. We’ll find someone they both are comfortable speaking with. As for me, well, Vee’s coping techniques that she taught me has helped bunches. And that therapist that squeezed me into the group therapy was amazing. I can wait for a more permanent therapist too.”

  The way he looked at her, Maksohm didn’t agree, and I wasn’t sure I did either. Rena’s nightmares had definitely improved, but I still found her up more often than asleep. Her insomnia was becoming normal, and that alarmed me. I wanted my wife well rested, thank you, not plagued with night terrors.

  “There you are!” Nora came out of a side door, a shield up to protect her against Chi and Vee’s antics, crossing to us with a smile on her face. “So…how was therapy?”

  “I had to pull both of them out,” Maksohm answered her crossly, mouth drawing back into an almost snarl. “Does that answer your question?”

  Nora winced, the veins of her neck popping out for a moment. “That bad, huh.”

  “Stop judging, sod it. I was trying to get us all cleared quickly so we could get out of here. No one wants to be sitting around in headquarters. You get volunteered for the unpleasant jobs.”

  Grimacing, Nora flicked an acknowledging hand his direction. “He does have a point.”

  “They refused to talk to her at all, and really, I can’t blame either of them. She’s too judgmental. I wouldn’t trust anything she said to me either.”

  Finally, he said it. “Why put me and Chi in with the same woman?”

  Maksohm winced, hearing the ‘are you crazy?’ in my voice very clearly. “It’s not like I had any other options with Chi. He’s managed to alienate every other therapist.”

  “Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me,” Nora muttered darkly. “He can be a certifiable pest when he puts his mind to it. He would not look at therapy sessions in a positive light. Dah’lil, what are the odds you can get these two signed off?”

  He opened his mouth, dark eyes darting toward her, then focused on me. I read the concern in his eyes, knew that he was remembering the same thing I was. That we shared the same worries and fears where Chi was concerned.

  Five months ago, when we were chasing after Toh’sellor, it had been difficult. Terrifying, exhausting, with us hopping all over the continents with literally no warning. Chi’s childhood abandonment had come back with a vengeance, leaving him sleep deprived and his judgment shot. It had taken days for Rena to figure out how to get him to sleep, and it ended up with the very interesting arrangement of all four of us sharing a bed several nights in a row. I didn’t mind doing that, not to help a friend, but at the same time I didn’t want that kind of weight resting on Chi either. It could crush a man’s soul, given enough time. And what if, heavens forbid, we stumbled into another situation similar to that one?

  “You shouldn’t just get him signed off,” Emily stated, tone soft but firm. “I saw what he was like. You don’t want an agent in the field in that condition.”

  Maksohm gave her a nod. “You’re right. Which was why I tried to push this forward. But it’s clearly the wrong therapist for him and there’s no other options. The only thing I can do is get someone to sign off on him transferring to a private therapist outside of the MISD.”

  My ears perked at this information. “That’s possible?”

  “They don’t like to do it, it’s more expensive, and the therapist has to be vetted to keep things confidential,” Nora explained, expression thoughtful, “but yes, it is. I thought Chi looked tired and a little frazzled, but you all looked tired by the time I caught up with you. Was he really that bad?”

  “I need alcohol for this conversation.” Maksohm sank into his seat, slouching and not looking up from the ground.

  Nora caught my eye, her brows furrowed in concern, and mouthed, That bad?

  Worse, I mouthed back.

  “Well. Then I agree, we should probably get some help to him. Although that does put a wrinkle in things.”

  I might be a new agent, but even I had instincts, and they stirred watchfully. Nora had not tracked us down here with Emily just to see how therapy sessions were going.

  Rena apparently had the same thought, as she asked, “What?”

  “You remember that possible Void Mage? I actually followed up with the agent doing the testing after you called, as I was curious what he had to say about matters. He’s on his way back, in fact, and what he reported to me was…conflicting. The boy definitely has magic, but it’s not quite like a mage’s magic, and he apparently doesn’t see things the way he should. Our agent in question left highly confused on whether he was a Void Mage or not, but to be fair to him, he’s never interacted directly with either you or your Void Mage master in Turransky, either. He might not know what he’s looking at.” Nora made a face before admitting, “He basically was coming back from a mission when the rumor was reported to us and we had him swing by and check on it. He’s not really an expert in these matters.”

  Now this made more sense. “I’ll happily go up and take a look,” Rena assured her. “But I’m not sure when I can get up there, not at the rate things are going down here.”

  “Yes, which is why I’m now not sure what to do.” Nora pursed her mouth in thought, glancing at her cousin. “Dah’lil, I think it might behoove us to take a break from this. It might do a world of good to let Bannen and Chi step back, regain their footing, before broaching the idea of therapy again. Bannen doesn’t need to be cleared in order to go out and double check a report for us, right?”

  I thought this a fabulous idea. Yes, please send me away from the crazy lady with the clipboard. Pretty please?

  Maksohm didn’t agree immediately, instead meeting Nora’s eyes thoughtfully. “Where exactly is this supposed Void Mage boy?”

  “Northern Sira. And I do mean right on the northern coastline.”

  “So, in other words, it’ll be at least a week there and a week back. I might be able to get a request in for a different therapist for Bannen in two weeks.” The fact that we much prefer me up and moving over waiting around in one spot went without being said. “Rena, what do you think?”

  “I thin
k I’m the only one qualified to say one way or another.” Shrugging, Rena splayed both hands out. “I think two weeks away from all of this is a good idea. Nothing’s urgently going on at the moment—”

  Three people knocked on wood as soon as she said that.

  “—and while I’m not excited about spending another two weeks on a train, I think we’ll survive. Do you want to put the request in today?”

  “I might as well. It’ll take a day or two for someone to review and give us an answer.” Maksohm glanced at the two not-quite-trying-to-kill-each-other. “We’re certainly not going to be doing anything remarkable here, so I think it’ll be approved. Emily, what do you want to do? Go or stay?”

  “I think I’ll stay.” Emily’s head canted a little, expression shrewd. “No offense, Agent Maksohm, but in some ways I know better than you what Bannen needs. I was there for the beginning of it, after all. I think I can help you find a therapist he trusts enough to talk to.”

  “I will take all the help I can get,” Maksohm assured her with a crooked smile. He shot me a look but I couldn’t disagree with Emily’s assessment and shrugged.

  “It actually might be a longer reprieve than that,” Nora corrected. “We received a request in for Rena. They’re working on putting in a bypass up near Gargan and they want her help with the demolition through the mountain.”

  My eyebrows arched into my hairline. Technically, we were allowed to do outside jobs with the MISD as long as our bosses approved it first. It was more like a consulting gig, really, but it created goodwill between the MISD and other companies/governments/people-of-influence, and that was always a good thing. We had some people still upset with us in corners of the world, after all, and making nice helped smooth that over. I didn’t expect a railroad job to be approved, but now that I thought about it, it made sense. Cutting down travel time for MISD agents was always a good investment for the future.

  “This is a civilian matter, and technically we wouldn’t be involved, but they sent word here, as they weren’t sure how else to reach you.” Nora retrieved a letter from under her arm before holding it up so we could read it. “It’s from Greenway Railroad Company. They want to tunnel through a mountain and create a bypass into Gargan.”