by Pepper Paris
I shook my head no, and when Vicky didn’t add anything, Roxie motioned me outside the curtain.
“What’s wrong?” I questioned, worried I’d missed something.
“Nothing. I’m just going to have to stay at the house until this is all over with. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it in front of her.” She tilted her head in the direction of her mom.
“Of course. We’ll take turns sitting up with her, and make sure that she’s as comfortable as possible,” I hastened to reassure her. “That’s what I’m here for.”
“Well, if you need to go home and get some rest, that’ll be okay too. I won’t hold it against you.”
Ignoring the looks I was getting from the others around us, I pulled her into my arms. “It’s going to be okay, I promise.”
She let me hold her for just a second before breaking out of the embrace. “I’ve got to get back to work. Take care of her for me.”
With a kiss on the cheek, she was gone.
I walked back in and saw Vicky glancing behind me for Roxie. She might not want to let her know, but she really did care about her.
“She had to go back to work, but she’s getting everything ready for you to go home and sleep in your own chair this afternoon.” I pasted a smile on my face. These two ladies were going to try my patience. They should just get over it and tell each other the truth.
“What else could I expect?” She shrugged in resignation and closed her eyes.
There was nothing else to do but sit there and wait.
The next few days were a blur of running errands and making sure that Vicky stayed comfortable. Since she’d gotten sick on a Thursday, Roxie had gone ahead to work on Friday, but requested hourly texts to let her know what was going on with her mother.
Saturday afternoon, Vicky went to sleep and she didn’t wake up. I had no idea the amount of work that went into verifying that someone had actually died. Roxie had been right that we needed to make sure and do it the correct way because there were so many ways this could have gone wrong.
“Time of death, 2:05 p.m.,” the hospice nurse announced upon checking to confirm she wasn’t breathing.
Roxie sat to the side on the couch with Sarah and I as we waited for the coroner to arrive.
Sophia had been keeping an eye on us and helping by bringing food over so that Roxie didn’t have to cook, but I wasn’t sure that she completely appreciated the gesture. It took away her excuse to be in the other room doing something.
When they arrived, we let them take care of things, but as the door closed on them, we stood there looking at each other, wondering what to do next. Roxie surprised me by walking into the kitchen and pulling everything out onto the counter.
“We’re taking all the food and stuff over to your house. Sarah, if you want to bring your stuff over there and sleep on the couch, you can.” She paused, walking over to where the spare house keys were kept. “Here, take this so you can get in and out. I’m going to stay at Wade’s until we can get this place empty and sold.”
“Um, Roxie, how about we let Sarah finish packing this up and you come on back to my house?” I was trying to be very gentle so that I didn’t tip her over the edge.
When she just stood there, I motioned for Sarah to take the keys from her.
“Hey.” I wrapped my arm around her as Sarah handed her the purse sitting on the counter. “Let’s go.”
When she offered no resistance, I led her out to the car and put her into the passenger seat. I would have to get my motorcycle later, but right now, she needed me more.
Sarah came out a few minutes later with Rox’s overnight bag, putting it in the back seat.
“I’ll get everything cleaned up and the living room cleared out of all the hospital type stuff.” She glanced in the car where Roxie was just staring into space. “Here are some leftover pills that they were giving Vicky to help her sleep. Make sure that Roxie takes them. She’s in shock right now.”
“Thanks.” I pocketed the pills and went around to the driver’s side. “I’ll let you know how she’s doing later.”
“Just be there for her. That’s what she needs the most right now,” Sarah sagely advised.
We didn’t say anything on the entire drive over, and Roxie was out of the car before I could walk around to get her bag from the back seat.
The sound of the apartment door shutting seemed to snap her out of it as she sank to the couch.
“Do you think she’s with my aunt?” she whispered into the silence.
Helpless, I didn’t know what to say, so I sat beside her, reaching over to hold her hand.
“If that’s where she wanted to be, then probably. They did seem to like each other, didn’t they?”
“I could never understand their relationship. My mom could care less about me, but if Aunt Saundra sneezed, we had to make sure that she was okay.” Tears started falling down her cheeks, but she made no move to wipe them away.
“What did I do to her to make her not love me?”
Her question haunted me, because I didn’t really have an answer.
“I think she cared about you in her own way. She was scared that if she let herself love you, then you might not love her back. You didn’t see it these past few weeks, but every day when you were expected to come home, she’d be watching the door for you. When you’d enter, her face would light up, and then she’d paste a frown on to cover it.”
“Why couldn’t she just let me know that she was happy to see me? Why did she have to play games? All I wanted from her was a simple, ‘good job on your grades,’ or ‘did you have a good day’?”
“I don’t have those answers for you, but she did mention that she’d left a letter with her lawyer for after her death.”
Roxie’s head shot up as she turned her tearstained face toward mine. “What? Why didn’t you tell me?”
I ducked my head, feeling guilty. “She was scared that if you read the letter before she died that you’d leave her. I only found out when she went into the hospital on Thursday. At that point, it wasn’t going to be long before she was gone, and I didn’t remember again until just now that she’d even said anything.”
“Do you know what it says?” Roxie gripped my hand so hard, I thought she might break it.
“Not exactly. She mentioned it had information about her side of the family and who your father was. She knew that you would want to go find them, but she wanted to be gone first.”
“I’m calling the lawyer right now. I need to read what she finally had the nerve to say to me after she’s gone and can’t defend herself.” Roxie sprang up, looking for her purse and phone.
“Uh, they’re right here on the couch, babe.” I got up, handing them to her as I went to the kitchen for a bottle of water.
“Hello? Mr. Dodson, my mother just passed away.” She listened for just a second before interrupting him. “Thank you. We can discuss my loss another day. Did she leave you a letter for me? When can I get it from you?” She started walking back and forth in the small space between the couch and the front door. “I can’t wait until Monday. I need to get it from you today. Oh, well, I understand that. Tomorrow morning then? Great. We’ll be there and discuss her arrangements.”
“So there’s nothing we can do tonight?” I placed the glass of water on the coffee table in front of her as she flopped onto the couch beside me again.
“He’s out of town, but he’s willing to meet me in the morning.” She grinned triumphantly. “I’m not going to let her win. I’m going find my family,” she giggled in glee.
“Why don’t you take these for your headache?” I suggested, holding out the pills Sarah had given me.
“What headache?” She glanced at me curiously.
“The one that’s going to start when your body catches up with your brain. It’s been a long few days, and you need a chance to let it all sink in.” I picked up the glass in my other hand, not really giving her a choice.
“You’re right
. I’m up and down right now. I’m so mad at her for dying and not being there for me, but at the same time, I’m so relieved.” She took the pills from me and chugged the entire glass of water. “In fact, I’d say I’m excited. I may have cousins, or even brothers and sisters. This could be the start of a whole new life for me.”
My heart sank at the thought. It would mean that she didn’t really need us to come home to anymore. I’d given her the information to replace us, but I couldn’t not tell her, even if it meant that we wouldn’t be her family anymore.
“Why don’t you run to the bathroom and then join me on the bed? We can talk about everything you’ve always thought a family would be like,” I urged, because once those pills took effect, she wasn’t going to move for about ten hours.
“Okay.” She jumped up in her hurry to get started. “This is going to be amazing.”
I kicked off my shoes and followed, pulling the sheets back enough that she could get under them.
“What if they don’t like me either?” She reappeared with a worried frown.
“Roxie, they’ll love you. How could they not?” I smiled at her, but on the inside, I was preparing myself for the not too distant future of when she might leave me.
She didn’t answer me because the pills had knocked her out. I waited a few moments to make sure that she really was asleep before leaving her to get some rest.
Group text:
Wade: Guys, just wanted to let you know—Roxie’s mom died today.
Carter: Is she okay?
Wade: I’m not sure. She’s cried and laughed. We are seeing the lawyer tomorrow. There’s a letter that has information on her family.
Jay: Wow! That’s crazy. I wish I could be there for her.
Wade: Just make sure to call her in the next few days to check in. I don’t think Kelly will even know about it until after he graduates next week.
Carter: I’ve got the tickets for the weekend. Have you talked to her boss yet?
Wade: That’s the next thing on my to-do list while she’s out. Depending on where her family is located, I’m going to suggest that she takes time off to go find them.
Jay: What about the funeral?
Wade: I think she’ll do a small ceremony like she did for her aunt. There’s no reason to do much because they never made any friends.
Carter: I can’t imagine not knowing anyone. That almost seems like you never made a mark on the world.
Wade: Well, I hope that we can do more with our lives than that.
Jay: I can’t get off early, but I’ll be there for the other. Does she know?
Wade: Nope. I’ve been waiting until the right moment, which hasn’t happened with all this going on.
Carter: Just make sure that we have a full box of condoms.
Wade: I’ve been getting her ready for it. Maybe she’ll be able to handle all of us at once.
Jay: I’m still not sure that this going to work.
Carter: Jay, quit being a baby. We all love you, and Roxie wouldn’t have spent Thanksgiving with you if she didn’t, so suck it up for her.
Wade: I thought she blew up your confidence.
Jay: Ha-ha. You both think you’re funny, but what happens when she chooses one of you over the rest of us?
I didn’t want to give Jay anything else to put more doubts in his head. Although, I wasn’t as sure about our future as I had been a few weeks before.
Wade: She wants a home that we can all come back to when we can. Not a house, but somewhere we make memories and live together as a family.
Carter: I’m down with that. My degree can be used in just about any place in the world. It will be good to have somewhere that Kelly can come when he’s on leave.
Jay: Did he make up with his parents?
Wade: Not yet.
Carter: We’ll figure something out. Keep us updated and I’ll see you soon.
Jay: I’m looking forward to some time off. This schedule is starting to get to me.
Wade: I’ll take care of her, but you know how hardheaded she can be on occasion.
Carter: She’ll make it through this. She has to.
Chapter Six
Roxie
When I woke up, it took a minute for me to remember where I was and why. The clock showed it was eight in the morning, which brought back the memory that my mother was dead. Gone. As in not coming back anymore.
I sank back against the pillows, wondering what I was supposed to be feeling. There was no grief or sadness. I’d tried my best to change how we communicated with each other, but nothing I’d done had made a difference.
Wade had given me something, because there was no way I would have slept that long otherwise.
While I felt I had things to do, nothing was making me want to get out of bed. There was a huge hole in my life that had always been pushed to the back, and now it was sitting right there, waiting for me to shine the light on it.
Why had my father and grandparents never come looking for me? I’d always thought it was just me and my mom until she’d brought us to live with Aunt Saundra. It had never dawned on me to question that my mother wasn’t telling the truth. She’d always been so willing to tell me the bad things that telling me something good would have been too shocking.
What had she done that made her stay away from her family? That it could be anything other than her own fault never entered my brain. My mom was only capable of causing problems, so it would make sense that she was the reason for the exile. Whether it was her own doing or theirs didn’t really matter at this point. I had the chance to fix something, to make my life better, and I was going to do just that.
“Wade?” I called out, knowing he had slept there because the bed was messed up.
“Hey, sleepyhead. You’ve been asleep for almost fourteen hours.” He poked his head in the room cheerfully.
“I know you put something in my drink, or gave me something to sleep, but it was probably for the best anyway.” I got up, ready to get dressed.
“Let’s go eat breakfast before you have to be at the lawyer’s office,” he suggested.
I stuck my head out of the closet. “I’m not sure I’ll be able to keep anything down.”
“If nothing else, it’ll help kill some time. We can discuss a few ideas I have and see what you think.” He sat on the edge of the bed to pull on his boots.
“Oh,” he added as casually. “We have to go over and pick up my bike when we’re done at the lawyer’s. Sarah brought all the food over here last night while you were asleep.”
“Sure.” I wasn’t sure what kind of mood I’d be in after I read whatever my mom had written, but there was no reason to punish Wade if it went bad. “Why don’t you have Sarah join us?”
He looked visibly relieved. “She was driving me crazy with promises to call her as soon as you had read it to tell her what’s in it.”
I grinned. “Leave it to her to make things seem normal. She won’t stop until one of us tells her everything, so we might as well include her so she’ll feel content.”
“You sure found yourself an interesting roommate.”
“Nothing in my life is normal, so why should she be any different? At least I don’t have to worry about shocking her with the drama in my life because she creates her own.” I shook my head as I went to the restroom to change.
Changing in front of the guys just seemed weird. Maybe when we’d been together for years it wouldn’t, but for now, he would have to deal with a closed door between us.
Mr. Dodson was an older balding man with a paunch that made sitting comfortably behind his desk difficult. He ushered us into his office through the other empty areas.
In my haste to find out what was going on, I’d forgotten that it was a Sunday, which meant the rest of the world was out enjoying their families. I was so close to finding out more about mine that for once, manners weren’t the first thing on my mind.
“Take a seat.” He directed the three of us around the conference table so he co
uld lay out the papers.
“Normally, we’d take a few days before doing something like this, but I can understand your eagerness to find out your history.” He gave me a sympathetic smile.
“Your mother and Saundra came to see me when you first moved into town. Now, all of your aunt’s assets were transferred to your mother, and will transfer to you now that she’s deceased.” He paused, but when we didn’t ask any questions, he frowned before continuing.
“The house is almost paid off. You have the choice to continue paying the loan or sell it. There weren’t many money things, but once the house loan is gone, the house could sell for a small chunk of money. There weren’t any stipulations placed on it, and when I checked with your mother after your aunt’s funeral, she said that you were a grown woman and could do what you wanted with it. She did give me an envelope to give you that she said would explain much better than she could in person.” He tapped the large manila envelope on the table.
It was all I could do not to tear it out from under his hand.
“Let me know what you want to do after you read her note. Once we have the death certificate, which takes a little while, I’ll go ahead and transfer things to you. In the meantime, you can get it ready to sell or rent, and we can sign the paperwork at a later date.”
He seemed to expect a response from me.
“Uh, thank you for taking care of this for us. We’ll be in touch once we know what she’s going to be doing in the near future,” Wade advised him, speaking for me. “Could we use your room for a few minutes to look this over?”
I shot him a look of gratitude. I didn’t want to wait to drive home to find out about my family.
“Certainly. I’ll just grab myself some coffee. Let me know when you’re done.” He hefted his girth up and walked out, closing the door behind him.
“Don’t keep us in suspense.” Sarah wiggled in her chair with excitement.
I opened the envelope nervously.
