Eastbound and Town: A LitRPG/Gamelit Adventure (The Good Guys Book 8)

by Eric Ugland

  “Tell you what, princess. Why don’t you just come with me, and we’ll see who’s right?”

  “I must wait for my Rogastinash.”

  “Bless you.”

  “You keep saying that—“

  “I guess the third time ain’t the charm. Well. I’m leaving, and he is too. You can wait here if you like, I suppose. No skin off my teeth.”

  “What manner of creature are you that you have skin on your teeth?”

  “Should have seen that coming. I do not have skin on my teeth. I am, however, leaving.”

  “Wait,” she said. “You cannot expect me to remain here—“

  “I asked you to come, lady. You’re the one staying.”

  “But my Rogastinash--“

  “That dude is not coming. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you, but he’s not coming. No one is. Just me and Tarryn. And we’re leaving.”

  “You do not understand,” she said, her big eyes going wider. “If I cross the threshold without my Rogastinash, very bad things will happen.”

  “I’m a little fuzzy on that whole good and bad thing,” I said. “What do you mean, ‘bad’?”

  “Bad things.”

  “So no. Okay. Bad as in you’ll be in a moral quandary—“

  “Bad. The gryllus will be released and they will kill everyone and everything from now until forever.”

  “That’s a bit more specific. Not really getting it though. What the hell is a gryllus?”

  “How do you not know of this hellspawn? It ravages our world unless the Rogastinash and I are brought together.”

  “I’m, I mean, I just don’t think I understand anything that’s going on here, and that’s probably my fault. But what is going on here? Can you explain it to me like I’m, I don’t know, a child?”

  She frowned and sighed, exasperated. But then she nodded. “I am the Leofaitwa. I wait here for the Rogastinash. We are joined together, and we are then taken back down the great mountain to Khixxungud. There the high priest and high priestess will examine us, and ask how we will seek our end. Then the Rogastinash and I will offer ourselves to the gods, that our land might be spared another lifetime.”

  “So you’re a sacrifice?”

  “I am that which allows our people to continue.”

  “And if you leave before the Roger Federer--“

  “Rogastinash.”

  “That guy. If you leave before he shows up, then some monster is unleashed and comes after you?”

  “It will come after anything living, and it will destroy it. Horribly.”

  “Okay. Well, I think those things are probably dead by now. And there is no ragamuffin to come and, uh, die with you. The world continued on. We’re okay.”

  She looked very confused. Probably about as confused as I felt.

  “Ask her if this temple keeps her in some sort of stasis,” Tarryn said from up above.

  “My friend wants to know if this temple keeps you in stasis.”

  “Yes. When I am found, I am placed within Chamber of Eternity within the House of Eternity to await the moment when the priests locate the Rogastinash.”

  “And time stops.”

  “Yes. When the Rogastinash is found, he is brought to this temple where we--“

  “Right, you become one, and then you leave and are sacrificed.”

  “It is a great honor. Clearly a barbarian like you cannot understand our glorious culture.”

  “I understand it. I just have a little more history on the matter than you do, so I don’t believe it.”

  She frowned at me.

  “She said it’s in stasis,” I called out.

  “She’s probably been in here for,” Tarryn said, “I mean, thousands of years. Or more.”

  “The fuck you talking about?”

  “I’m betting the thing that made this valley is the thing that made this temple go sideways. Which means the whole of the valley has formed while this girl has been sleeping in here.”

  “Fuck.”

  “Yeah.”

  “What is your friend saying? Does he not speak the language?”

  “Interesting how everyone considers their language THE language,” I said.

  She just looked at me like I was an idiot. A look I had gotten to know well over my two lifetimes.

  “He says you’ve been sleeping in here for thousands of years or more.”

  She blinked. And then blinked again.

  “I will have you take me with you,” she said. “Outside. I must see this for myself.”

  “No longer worried about the monsters?”

  “They will come. We will likely die. But I must know the truth.”

  “Sure. Works for me. Mind holding on?”

  Chapter Forty-Three

  She didn’t mind holding on, nor did I mind having her hold on. I wasn’t going to complain about a hot warm body holding tight against mine. Though it would have been a bit nicer if she wasn’t half-strangling me the whole time. I didn’t say, ‘hang on my neck like you’re going to fall to your death,’ but that’s the way she took it.

  There was no rumble or anything when she crossed the threshold. No baying of hellhounds or claws breaking free from the earth. There was a far off noise of stone scraping against stone, but that was it. It did give me slight pause, because either something opened or something closed, and neither of things was going to be good for me. Or Tarryn. Really anyone.

  The climb back out was, by necessity, quieter than going in, what with my windpipe only half open, and Tarryn struggling to pull himself up along the rope, even though we were basically walking up a slide. He wasn’t exactly out of shape, it was more like he didn’t have a shape to begin with. Like he just didn’t have muscle at all. I presume the girl just looked around at things, considering she was, you know, behind me and I couldn’t see her.

  We took a break at the next doorway, where I had to climb up the rope with the girl on my back, and then hauled Tarryn up as well.

  I had the long climb to the surface next, and I could see just the hint of daylight above us.

  “That’s the surface there,” I said. “See the light?”

  She peered up, and shook her head.

  “It cannot be,” she said. “There must have been a problem. They must not have found the Rogastinash in time and the world ended.”

  “I mean, it didn’t totally end,” I said.

  “The city of Khixxungud still stands?”

  “Uh, hold on. Tarryn, you ever heard of a place called Khixxungud?”

  Tarryn looked up from his prone position where he totally wasn’t probably napping.

  “Khixxungud?” he asked. “No.”

  “Not even in legend or stories or something?”

  “Nothing like that.”

  “And there’s no city around here?”

  “Osterstadt.”

  “Right, but—“

  “There’s nothing around here by that name. And no other city besides Osterstadt even in legend and history.”

  “What about the city underneath Osterstadt?” I asked. “With the dungeon?”

  “According to what I’ve been taught, Osterstadt was settled on top of ruins that were maybe two thousand years old. At most. And the people who were there were elven heretics who worshipped the blood god.”

  “The blood god?”

  “Yes.”

  “Sounds, um, not great.”

  “You do know how a Dungeon is formed, yes?”

  “A bit of blood?”

  “The deaths of thousands.”

  “Except Typhon is the god of dungeons.”

  “Yep.”

  “So, do those, I mean, who are those people sacrificed to?”

  “The dungeon. They’re killed to make the dungeon.”

  “So these elves who worshipped the blood god made a dungeon by—“

  Tarryn laid his head back down. “Do you really want me to explain this right now, Montana? Wait until I’ve had a few mugs of mead, and
then ask this again.”

  He had a point. In a way. It wasn’t exactly the ideal time for a philosophical chat. And yet, it was kind of the perfect time because we were really just waiting. I didn’t need the rest, but it seemed like my two traveling companions did. So, to continue passing the time, I figured I’d talk to my new friend.

  “What’s your name?” I asked.

  “My name was taken the day I became the Leofaitwa,” she said.

  “Oh. I thought that was, like, your Choice.”

  “It was my choice. To become the Leofaitwa is an honor. I was offered the opportunity, and I chose to take it for the good of my family, my people, and my world.”

  “No offense, but you’d be phenomenal at propaganda.”

  “I do not take offense.”

  “So what’s your Choice?”

  “I made my choice.”

  “Yes, I get that. But, like, what’s your Choice and level?”

  She turned her head to the side, as if that was going to offer her the perspective to understand what I was saying. Her big eyes just registered genuine and extreme confusion.

  “Do you have a level?” I asked.

  She shook her head. “I do not know how I would have a level.”

  “Do you get notifications?”

  “I do not know what you mean.”

  “Do you have a character sheet?”

  “I have nothing,” she said, spreading out her gossamer gown to make it quite clear she had nothing whatsoever besides, well, the gossamer gown.

  “No, not— I mean, in your head.”

  “How would I have something inside my head? Do you?”

  “Tarryn,” I said, “I think we might have either a giant problem or, well, we have a problem. I think.”

  “Is it too much to ask for five minutes of quiet before we—“

  “Okay, first, all you have to do is hold on to a fucking rope, I have to climb up and pull you out. Two, she doesn’t have a character sheet or a level or anything.”

  Tarryn sat up and looked over at her. Then at me. Then back at her.

  “Tell her I’m going to cast a little spell that will not hurt her, okay?”

  I relayed the message.

  She seemed unconcerned.

  Tarryn did a little wiggling of his fingers, and I saw motes of light dance across the space between Tarryn and the Leofaitwa, then the light swirled around her for a second before disappearing.

  “Well that’s different,” Tarryn finally said.

  “What is?” I asked.

  “She doesn’t have a, I mean, it’s like she doesn’t exactly exist.”

  “Can you put that in simpler terms for me?”

  “I mean, she doesn’t come back as anything. When I cast identify, the spell goes onto her and then just dissipates.”

  “Could it, I mean, maybe she’s warded?”

  “I’d still get something back, you know.”

  “Like the question marks.”

  “Exactly.”

  “The spell,” the girl said, “did it work?”

  “Yes and no,” I replied.

  “This is very strange,” Tarryn said getting quite close to the girl and peering at her.

  “I think, uh,” I started, trying to get my brain to work on this situation, “it might be time to get someone bigger involved in this.”

  “Bigger?” he asked.

  “Just, uh, wait a minute.”

  I knelt down, put my hands together, and closed my eyes. “Uh, Mister Paul. Minor question from your favorite bearded dude. I just found someone who doesn’t seem to have a character sheet or know anything—“

  There was a sharp crack, and a man stepped out of nowhere into reality.

  Mister Paul stood in front of me, looking resplendent in a white suit.

  “What do you mean, ‘doesn’t have a character sheet?’” he asked. Then he looked up. “Look at that! I told you The Stick would come in handy.”

  “The girl,” I said, pointing to her. I was more than a little surprised to see that both the girl and Tarryn were moving around, looking at Mister Paul.

  Mister Paul stepped around me rather adroitly, and walked over to the girl.

  He looked her up and down. And then down and up. Then over at Tarryn. Back at the girl. One perfectly shaped eyebrow raised up.

  “Oh,” he said. “Oh dear. Oh very dear.”

  And then he disappeared.

  Chapter Forty-Four

  “Not exactly what I was expecting,” I said.

  “Who was that?” Tarryn asked.

  “Mister Paul.”

  “Means nothing to me.”

  “A god.”

  “You can just call on a god and he shows up? Who are you?”

  “Montana of Coggeshall. Imperial duke and all-around badass.”

  “This is one of those moments where I’m not sure if I’m fortunate to know you.”

  “Or?”

  “About to be killed.”

  “Probably yes.”

  “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I appreciate all you’ve done for me, but I have never feared for my life as much as when I’m around you.”

  “I get that a lot.”

  “What is he saying?” the girl asked.

  “That he loves me and thinks I’m the best thing in his life,” I replied.

  “Are you partners?”

  “Not like that.”

  “And the creature that you just spoke to?”

  “The one that disappeared? He’s, uh, sort of a friend and sort of a god.”

  “You are friends with a god?”

  “It’s a long story.”

  I stretched out a little — I certainly didn’t want to get a cramp while climbing up with someone on my back.

  “Ready to go up?” I asked.

  The girl looked up.

  “No,” she said, and she pointed.

  There was a glowing barrier of some form that was now covering the entire exit.

  “Hey, uh, Tarryn?” I said.

  “What?” he asked with eyes remaining closed.

  “You got a clue what’s going on up there?”

  He opened his eyes and looked up. He scrambled up to his feet, and immediately shot a bit of magic from his fingertips. The magic just fizzled against the barrier and nothing at all happened.

  Tarryn frowned, shook his head, and then shot another bit of magic from his hands. Once again, as soon as the spell hit the barrier, it fizzled out.

  “It’s not something I can identify,” Tarryn said. “I am suddenly feeling like we should have left this ruin alone.”

  I sighed, wondering if he was right. I mean, in a technical sense, if we’d just left the thing alone, then the girl and everything else in the temple would have remained in stasis and would have been totally fine. Mostly. I mean, they’d be unchanged, so it’s not like she’d have been worse off.

  “The rope,” I said, tugging on the rope, “it goes through the barrier. Do you think we can use that in some way?”

  “To get through that thing? Maybe. But do you want to risk it?”

  “I mean, we aren’t in danger yet.”

  “That’s a big yet.”

  “Sure, but I’d prefer not being in danger yet to being in danger, right?”

  “I suppose that’s true.”

  I turned to the girl, the Leofaitwa, “What else is in here?”

  “There is my chambers at the top,” she said. “And at the bottom reside the gryllus.”

  “What about the middle?”

  “The payment for the families.”

  “The payment?”

  “My family and the family of the Rogastinash are given coin to make up for the loss of their children.”

  “You.”

  “Yes.”

  “And is it a lot of coin?”

  “It is enough coin that the family need not work for the coming lifetime.”

  “I’m, uh, maybe you two should just stay here a minute.” />
  The girl and Tarryn looked at me, then each other. I took the momentary distraction to hop back in the hole. I moved quite a bit faster, sliding nearly full speed with just one hand resting lightly on the guide rope. When I got to the second landing, I stopped.

  Then, making a quick decision, I slid down to the girl’s bedchamber. I shoved in all the gold furniture that fit into my knapsack. Really, it was just the bed. There was no way to get it the knapsack’s already oversized opening. I’d come back with a saw later.

  Back at the middle level, I rerouted our guide rope so it went down to the door there. This door was iron. Or a dark metal of some type. I was worried it might be locked, but, nope. The door opened right up.

  A tangle of snakes hissed when they saw the light. They were writhing around on the floor, what used to be the wall. Several chests that had broken against the wall, spilling coins out everywhere. I didn’t want to risk it, so I used my axe to kill the snakes. After a few quick throws and returns, the snakes were toast.

  I didn’t get any notifications for killing them. Nothing. Strange.

  I dropped inside the chamber and picked up a coin. There was a man’s head on one side, and a skull on the other — nothing I’d seen before. But it was gold. And gold coins were easy to melt down. I wondered if I should make my own coin, or if that was severely narcissistic.

  All the coins and the chests and even the snake bodies went into the knapsack. It took less than five minutes for me to be standing in an empty room.

  I climbed up the rope, then hauled myself back up the slide, heading back toward where Tarryn and the girl were. But I paused at the landing before theirs, where the tunnel leading down to the gryllus was.

  You know the drill by now. There’s no way I was going to go straight past and rejoin Tarryn and the girl. I took a step down the new path, straddling the two slides.

  “Really bad idea,” Mister Paul said, slipping into reality right next to me. “Those creatures are currently stymied by stupidity, in that they cannot find the door to get out. Should you provide them the exit, they will use it.”

  “Are they that bad?” I asked.

  “I would put my money on them destroying not just you but Coggeshall as a whole.”

  “Seems bad.”

  “They are. Very bad.”