The Seaside Angel

by Evie Grace

  ‘I’ve never been to the circus.’ She’d wanted to go, ever since Pa had forbidden it and Nanny had taken them to watch the parade.

  ‘Then come with me. What is life if not to be lived?’

  ‘That’s true. Yes, why not?’

  ‘I’ll see you at the station at six.’ Beaming, he opened the door again and Hannah hurried away, passing Mr Mordikai who gave her an enquiring look.

  ‘Good morning,’ she said brightly.

  ‘Sister Bentley. Sister!’ Doctor Clifton came hurrying up behind her. ‘You forgot this.’

  ‘Thank you,’ she said, blushing furiously as he handed her the bottle.

  She returned to the ward and spent the time until the end of her shift in a ferment of anticipation. Hurrying home, she found Ruby in the sitting room, brushing her long, dark locks which gleamed in the slanting rays of the sun.

  ‘I used the last bottle of beer on my hair. I hope you don’t mind.’

  Hannah did mind, but she didn’t say so.

  ‘I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to let you down today. I’ve been invited to the circus this evening.’

  ‘You’re going with Charlotte?’

  ‘With Doctor Clifton.’

  ‘I should have guessed,’ Ruby smiled.

  She explained that his cousin was indisposed, and that they were going to watch one of their former patients.

  ‘You go and enjoy yourself,’ Ruby said.

  ‘You don’t mind? You wouldn’t prefer me to stay and keep you company?’

  ‘No, I don’t want to spoil it for you. But won’t people talk? They’ll say you’re walking out with him.’

  ‘Well, I’m not.’

  ‘It’s rather hypocritical of you.’

  ‘My situation bears no resemblance to yours.’

  ‘As you’ve tried so eloquently to explain.’ Ruby smiled again, all sweetness and light. For a young woman who could have been ruined by her recent escapade with the dreadful Mr Milani, she seemed remarkably lighthearted, showing no remorse or regret. ‘You deserve an evening off. A change is as good as a rest, as Grandma used to say. You’d better hurry up and get changed. There’s cold meat – ham and mustard – for supper if you aren’t dining out.’

  Thanking her, Hannah went to eat, then changed out of her day dress. She scrubbed her hands and face, but no matter how hard she tried to hide it with rose-scented soap, she always smelled of carbolic. She put on a dark green dress which set off her coppery hair, then returned to the sitting room.

  ‘Ruby, may I borrow your brooch? The cameo?’

  ‘I’m … I’m not sure where it is.’

  Hannah collected her gloves from the shelf alongside her nursing books.

  ‘Where are my shoes?’

  ‘They’re in the kitchen – I borrowed them to go shopping. You know how much mine make my feet ache.’

  ‘That’s because they’re too small, even for your tiny feet.’

  ‘They are the fashion – they say that a woman’s social position can be judged by the appearance of the foot. A small, well-shod and prettily used foot adds charm to the appearance and indicates high standing.’

  ‘You shouldn’t allow yourself to be influenced by such claptrap.’

  ‘You think me shallow, but …’ Ruby’s face crumpled. ‘I feel the loss of my status severely. At home, we had servants, tradesmen calling at the house, visits from our stepmother’s friends and acquaintances …’

  ‘Then go back to Canterbury,’ Hannah said, hurt.

  ‘How can I? Pa will only have me locked up again.’

  ‘It’s up to you, but surely there is some compensation: your sister’s company; the fresh sea air; the entertainment. It costs nothing to stroll along the front and watch the world go by.’

  ‘That’s just it. I don’t want the world to pass me by – I ache to be part of it. And even though I know I mustn’t see him again, I miss Antonio …’

  ‘Then we should consider finding something to fill the hours when I’m not here. We’ll sit down and talk about it tomorrow.’

  ‘Promise?’

  Nodding, Hannah went to fetch her soft kid shoes. She slipped them on and fastened the straps across the front via the buttons at the side, then straightened the bows on the toes, before putting on her cape and bonnet.

  ‘Make sure you tell me all about it,’ Ruby said, as Hannah pulled on her gloves.

  ‘I will, but don’t wait up for me. I’m not sure what time I’ll be back.’

  Ruby got up and walked across to give her a peck on the cheek. ‘I’m sorry for being sharp with you.’

  ‘Apology accepted,’ Hannah said lightly. ‘Goodnight, Ruby.’

  She found Doctor Clifton waiting for her at the station. He greeted her with a smile, making her traitorous heart lurch.

  ‘I’ve bought the train tickets.’

  ‘That’s very kind, but you must allow me to pay for mine.’

  ‘Not when everyone knows that nurses are paid a pittance.’

  ‘I should still pay my own way,’ she said stiffly.

  ‘We’re friends – you’re doing me a favour.’

  ‘If you’re sure,’ she said, softening. ‘I don’t want there to be any misunderstanding between us.’

  ‘We’re friends,’ he repeated, his voice tinged with regret.

  She looked away. Did that mean he still harboured hopes of something more?

  ‘I promise I won’t try to kiss you,’ he added gruffly, ‘although I make no secret of the fact that I’d like to. I understand your ambition and the sacrifices you’ve made to get this far, and although I grieve that you prefer to be wedded to the house than married to me, I will have to live with it. And that’s all I wish to say on the matter. Except that I wonder if you would permit me to address you as Hannah while we are away from the house?’

  ‘Well, of course.’

  ‘In return, you may call me James, if you like.’

  ‘Thank you, James, although you must forgive me if I forget and revert to Doctor Clifton,’ she smiled.

  Smiling back, he looked past her. ‘This is our train.’

  They boarded and sat side by side on one of the upholstered benches in a first-class compartment. James asked after Ruby.

  ‘Your sister is more settled in Margate now?’

  ‘A little, thank you. She’s finding it hard to fill her time.’

  ‘It’s said that the devil finds work for idle hands,’ he ventured. ‘Oh, I don’t mean … Forgive me, but I wondered if all was well. You’ve seemed preoccupied recently, as if something is troubling you.’

  ‘Ruby is a handful,’ she admitted.

  ‘You will let me know if there’s ever anything I can do.’

  ‘I’m very grateful for your kindness, but this is a family matter.’

  ‘I won’t press you, then, but remember that you’re not alone.’

  ‘I’m very fortunate,’ she said, recalling how Charlotte had offered the same.

  She gazed out of the window as the train rattled along the tracks. It stopped at Broadstairs then continued for some distance before sounding its whistle and entering a tunnel, making her jump.

  James smiled. ‘We’e almost there. From the station, it’s only a ten-minute walk to the High Street.’

  They disembarked at Ramsgate, not far from the harbour, and found their way to their destination: the recently opened Sanger’s Amphitheatre and Hotel, outside which stood several bronzes of barely dressed dancing ladies, holding lamps aloft. Joining the throng entering the building, they gave in their tickets and found their seats in the upper circle where the air was close and warm.

  ‘We arrived just in time,’ James said, as a fanfaronade of trumpets sounded, and the ringmaster in red tails and a top hat strode into the ring, cracking his long whip, and announced the start of the programme: a spectacle of equestrian skills in the manner of the Wild West; the story of Billy the Kid and a world where good conquered bad, and love won out. Next came the par
ade of freaks, the World’s Tallest Man pushing a trolley, on which stood the World’s Smallest Woman. Behind them came the ‘Woman with Five Chins’.

  ‘There has to be some trickery behind this,’ James whispered. ‘Look how the young lady is carrying a large bouquet of flowers to make her seem more diminutive than she really is. They advertise her as being twenty-one, but she can’t be more than eleven. As for the tallest man, have you noticed how long his trousers are?’

  She nodded.

  ‘That’s because his shoes have to be built up on platforms.’

  ‘Keep yer voice down,’ someone complained from behind them.

  James muttered an apology as the freaks left the ring and a troupe of acrobats came tumbling in.

  As they whirled and leapt through the air, Hannah began to understand Ruby’s fascination with the lion tamer’s showmanship. Her nostrils filled with the scent of pine, perfume and sherbet. The rainbow sparkle of a million sequins dazzled her, and the rhythm of drums and explosive cracks of the ringmaster’s whip pounded her eardrums.

  She turned to James who gave a sheepish smile, then looked back at the ring. She felt the slightest shift of his thigh against her skirt, and a shiver of longing ran up her spine while the acrobats posed and waved before running light-footed out of the ring.

  ‘Ladies and gentlemen, give a big hand to … our masters of contortionism: the amazing India Rubber Brothers.’ The ringmaster held out his arms, and two young men came into the ring with a table which they placed in the centre to roars of applause.

  ‘It’s Alan and his brother,’ James whispered.

  She hardly recognised their former patient, dressed in a close-fitting costume of blue, silver and white stripes, as he cartwheeled on to the table. He helped his brother spring up to join him, before they began to contort themselves into all kinds of impossible positions. Alan bent over backwards until the top of his head was pressed against the backs of his thighs, then he and his brother used each other as frames to balance on with one hand. Their finale was to make a great show of folding themselves up to fit into a tiny cardboard box before the ‘World’s Strongest Man’ came to pick it up and carry it away.

  Hannah could hardly believe her eyes, remembering how lame Alan had been when he was admitted to the infirmary. It was a miracle.

  The India Rubber Brothers’ act was followed by the lions which arrived in a trailer drawn by a pair of horses dressed as unicorns.

  ‘Let’s have a warm welcome for the Greatest Lion Tamer in the Universe, Antonio Milani,’ the ringmaster announced, making Hannah feel sick at heart, because it wasn’t fair that he’d gone unpunished for trying to seduce her sister. ‘His bravery is beyond compare! Marvel as he subdues the king of the jungle and his queens.’

  Mr Milani appeared, holding his hat and whip aloft.

  ‘Open the cage,’ he shouted. ‘Release the beasts.’

  At the sound of a drumroll, an assistant unlocked the cage and an elderly lion and two lionesses came lolloping out, growling, snarling and licking their lips.

  With a twirl of his whip, the lion tamer directed the beasts to three brightly painted pedestals which had been placed in a row. They jumped up and sat on them, and the old lion turned and stared into the crowd with its yellow-brown eyes. What was it thinking? That one of them would make a good dinner? Hannah reached out for James’s arm, a spontaneous impulse. He rested his hand on hers, and her heart beat even faster.

  Mr Milani raised his whip and the lion struggled on to its hind legs, uttering a pathetic roar while the lionesses bowed at his feet. He called the lion to him, patted first one shoulder, then the other, to encourage it to jump up and place its giant paws on either side of his neck. He rubbed the lion’s chest, then pushed it down again and flicked it away with his whip.

  The crowd burst into applause, and Hannah caught sight of a young woman waiting at the entrance to the ring, her head uncovered. Her chest tightened as she recognised Ruby’s dark shining hair and the familiar curve of her cheek. Mortified, she glanced towards James, but he didn’t appear to have noticed anything was amiss, and that was the way it was going to stay if she had anything to do with it. How dare Ruby disobey her again! After all her promises that she wouldn’t see Mr Milani! Having been dragged back into her web of lies and deceit, Hannah could quite cheerfully have thrown her to the lions.

  ‘I’d advise you to see a doctor about your hearing,’ she heard James say.

  ‘I’m sorry?’ she said, wondering what to do.

  ‘I’ve asked you three times if you’d like a drink during the interval.’

  ‘Oh yes, that would be lovely.’ She glanced towards the spot where she’d seen Ruby, but she’d disappeared. She decided not to go after her, not wanting to ruin James’s evening or reveal her sister’s indiscretion, afraid that he’d judge her for it. The circus was in Ramsgate for at least another week, so she’d know where to find Mr Milani if she had to. She accompanied James to one of the anterooms to buy ginger beer at the bar, then they moved to a quiet corner.

  ‘I was glad to see how well Alan looks,’ she said.

  ‘He’s made a remarkable recovery, thanks to you.’

  ‘You would have made sure he was admitted if I hadn’t been there.’

  ‘Well, maybe.’

  ‘Of course you would – I know you too well. Thank you for inviting me this evening. It’s been an education.’

  ‘I think it’s supposed to be fun as well,’ he pointed out. ‘I enjoyed the contortionists, but not watching the freaks who are people just like us.’

  ‘Without the circus, they wouldn’t be able to make a living. I don’t think they can have a bad life,’ Hannah observed.

  ‘Then we’ll have to agree to disagree on that one,’ he said, adding quickly, ‘It’s a good thing – the world would be a very dull place if everyone held the same opinions.’

  ‘The freaks have a choice. They can choose whether or not they display themselves in front of the public—’

  ‘Are you sure about that? I’d have to be starving before I offered myself up to the curiosity and ridicule of this crowd for the sake of a few shillings.’

  ‘I hadn’t thought of it that way,’ she admitted. ‘I suppose they’re exploited just like the animals, although the lion tamer, that ridiculous Mr Milani, says otherwise.’

  ‘You’ve met him?’

  ‘Ruby and I spoke to him when we visited the menagerie.’ She could hardly bear to speak of it because that was where her sister’s infatuation with him had started. ‘He took great pains to tell us that the lions were content with their lot, having protection, shelter and food in return for performing a few tricks, but they must pine for their freedom on the great plains of Africa, mustn’t they?’

  ‘He gives the illusion of cooperation and kindness, but he controls them with the whip. The poor creatures eye him with fear, not respect.’

  ‘You can read the minds of animals?’

  ‘At the risk of offending people who believe in the divine superiority of humans over the rest of God’s creation, I have found there is little difference in the feelings that animals have – fear, joy, sadness – only in the ways that they express them.’

  ‘When the animals were on the ward, the young ones playing with the boys and girls, there was joy on all their faces,’ she remembered.

  ‘There you go. As for our lion tamer, he’s no more Italian than you or I. I wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t hail from London or Bognor Regis.’ James checked his pocket watch. ‘We’d better make our way back inside.’

  ‘Prepare to be amazed, astounded, dumbfounded …’ bellowed the ringmaster when the audience had returned to their seats. Ruby was back beside the ring, Hannah noted. ‘Let us welcome the Amazing Aerial Ajax whose audacity will confound, astonish … and amuse …’

  Hannah looked up to the ceiling where the high wire and scaffolds had been prepared during the interval, then down at the safety net.

  ‘’E can’t
be all that amazin’ if ’e needs somethin’ to catch ’im,’ someone grumbled, but a drumroll overwhelmed any reply.

  Mr Allspice came striding into the ring, holding out his cloak to show off its golden lining. He whipped it off and flung it behind him where Mrs Allspice, wearing a sequinned tutu and a headdress laden with silk flowers, caught it. Her husband made the most of his ascent up the ladder, stopping now and again to pose on the way. When he reached the scaffold stage in the heights of the building, he stood with his arms outstretched, garnering further applause.

  ‘He ’asn’t done nothin’ yet,’ someone grumbled.

  ‘Look at ’is assistant – mutton dressed as lamb.’

  The audience fell silent and still, as Mr Allspice stepped out of the shadows on to the rope. He took a second step through the smoky haze of the gaslights and then another, and just as the crowd began to breathe again, he slipped.

  At the collective gasp of horror, he caught hold of the rope with both hands and, with a surge of effort and a twist of his body, he was back on his feet.

  ‘Bravo, bravo, sir!’ someone shouted as the ropewalker stood on one leg, like a ballerina, his head to one side and his forefinger pressed to his cheek, as though he was wondering what to do next.

  It had been a ruse to catch their attention, Hannah thought with relief.

  ‘Ah, ’tis a comedy,’ their neighbour said. ‘I thought as much.’

  ‘They call ’im the flyin’ fool, so I’ve ’eard.’

  ‘I’ve seen ’im before – I wa’n’t going to say nothin’ because I didn’t want to spoil it for anyone.’

  Hannah turned briefly to James, who grinned as Mr Allspice tipped into a handstand, his arms wobbling before he returned to an upright position, landing astride the rope and making much play of the pain that would have affected his nether regions, if it hadn’t been part of the show.

  ‘Ooh, I felt that,’ someone commented as runnels of laughter spilled through the amphitheatre.

  ‘Oh, how crude.’