The Complete Novels of George Orwell

by George Orwell

  The bank made no trouble about the cheque. Gordon had no banking account, but they knew him well, for Mr McKechnie banked there. They had cashed editors' cheques for Gordon before. There was only a minute's consultation, and then the cashier came back.

  'Notes, Mr Comstock?'

  'One five pound, and the rest pounds, please.'

  The flimsy luscious fiver and the five clean pound notes slid rustling under the brass rail. And after them the cashier pushed a little pile of half-crowns and pennies. In lordly style Gordon shot the coins into his pocket without even counting them. That was a bit of backsheesh. He had only expected ten pounds for fifty dollars. The dollar must be above par. The five pound note, however, he carefully folded up and stowed away in the American envelope. That was Julia's fiver. It was sacrosanct. He would post it to her presently.

  He did not go home for dinner. Why chew leathery beef in the aspidistral dining-room when he had ten quid in pocket-five quid, rather? (He kept forgetting that half the money was already mortgaged to Julia.) For the moment he did not bother to post Julia's five pounds. This evening would be soon enough. Besides, he rather enjoyed the feeling of it in his pocket. It was queer how different you felt with all that money in your pocket. Not opulent, merely, but reassured, revivified, reborn. He felt a different person from what he had been yesterday. He was a different person. He was no longer the downtrodden wretch who made secret cups of tea over the oil stove at 31 Willowbed Road. He was Gordon Comstock, the poet, famous on both sides of the Atlantic. Publications: Mice (1932), London Pleasures (1935). He thought with perfect confidence of London Pleasures now. In three months it should see the light. Demy octavo, white buckram covers. There was nothing that he did not feel equal to now that his luck had turned.

  He strolled into the Prince of Wales for a bite of food. A cut off the joint and two veg., one and twopence, a pint of pale ale ninepence, twenty Gold Flakes a shilling. Even after that extravagance he still had well over ten pounds in hand-or rather, well over five pounds. Beer-warmed, he sat and meditated on the things you can do with five pounds. A new suit, a week-end in the country, a day-trip to Paris, five rousing drunks, ten dinners in Soho restaurants. At this point it occurred to him that he and Rosemary and Ravelston must certainly have dinner together tonight. Just to celebrate his stroke of luck; after all, it isn't every day that ten pounds-five pounds-drops out of the sky into your lap. The thought of the three of them together, with good food and wine and money no object took hold of him as something not to be resisted. He had just a tiny twinge of caution. Mustn't spend all his money, of course. Still, he could afford a quid-two quid. In a couple of minutes he had got Ravelston on the pub phone.

  'Is that you, Ravelston? I say, Ravelston! Look here, you've got to have dinner with me tonight.'

  From the other end of the line Ravelston faintly demurred. 'No, dash it! You have dinner with me.' But Gordon overbore him. Nonsense! Ravelston had got to have dinner with him tonight. Unwillingly, Ravelston assented. All right, yes, thanks; he'd like it very much. There was a sort of apologetic misery in his voice. He guessed what had happened. Gordon had got hold of money from somewhere and was squandering it immediately; as usual, Ravelston felt he hadn't the right to interfere. Where should they go? Gordon was demanding. Ravelston began to speak in praise of those jolly little Soho restaurants where you get such a wonderful dinner for half a crown. But the Soho restaurants sounded beastly as soon as Ravelston mentioned them. Gordon wouldn't hear of it. Nonsense! They must go somewhere decent. Let's do it all regardless, was his private thought; might as well spend two quid-three quid, even. Where did Ravelston generally go? Modigliani's, admitted Ravelston. But Modigliani's was very-but no! not even over the phone could Ravelston frame that hateful word 'expensive'. How remind Gordon of his poverty? Gordon mightn't care for Modigliani's, he euphemistically said. But Gordon was satisfied. Modigliani's? Right you are-half past eight. Good! After all, if he spent even three quid on the dinner he'd still have two quid to buy himself a new pair of shoes and a vest and a pair of pants.

  He had fixed it up with Rosemary in another five minutes. The New Albion did not like their employees being rung up on the phone, but it did not matter once in a way. Since that disastrous Sunday journey, five days ago, he had heard from her once but had not seen her. She answered eagerly when she heard whose voice it was. Would she have dinner with him tonight? Of course! What fun! And so in ten minutes the whole thing was settled. He had always wanted Rosemary and Ravelston to meet, but somehow had never been able to contrive it. These things are so much easier when you've got a little money to spend.

  The taxi bore him westward through the darkling streets. A three-mile journey-still, he could afford it. Why spoil the ship for a ha'porth of tar? He had dropped that notion of spending only two pounds tonight. He would spend three pounds, three pounds ten-four pounds if he felt like it. Slap up and regardless-that was the idea. And, oh! by the way! Julia's fiver. He hadn't sent it yet. No matter. Send it first thing in the morning. Good old Julia! She should have her fiver.

  How voluptuous were the taxi cushions under his bum! He lolled this way and that. He had been drinking, of course-zhad had two quick ones, or possibly three, before coming away. The taxi-driver was a stout philosophic man with a weatherbeaten face and a knowing eye. He and Gordon understood one another. They had palled up in the bar where Gordon was having his quick ones. As they neared the West End the taximan drew up, unbidden, at a discreet pub on a corner. He knew what was in Gordon's mind. Gordon could do with a quick one. So could the taximan. But the drinks were on Gordon-that too was understood.

  'You anticipated my thoughts,' said Gordon, climbing out.

  'Yes, sir.'

  'I could just about do with a quick one.'

  'Thought you might, sir.'

  'And could you manage one yourself, do you think?'

  'Where there's a will there's a way,' said the taximan.

  'Come inside,' said Gordon.

  They leaned matily on the brass-edged bar, elbow to elbow, lighting two of the taximan's cigarettes. Gordon felt witty and expansive. He would have liked to tell the taximan the history of his life. The white-aproned barman hastened towards them.

  'Yes sir?' said the barman.

  'Gin,' said Gordon.

  'Make it two,' said the taximan.

  More matily than ever, they clinked glasses.

  'Many happy returns,' said Gordon.

  'Your birthday today, sir?'

  'Only metaphorically. My re-birthday, so to speak.'

  'I never had much education,' said the taximan.

  'I was speaking in parables,' said Gordon.

  'English is good enough for me,' said the taximan.

  'It was the tongue of Shakespeare,' said Gordon.

  'Literary gentleman, are you, sir, by any chance?'

  'Do I look as moth-eaten as all that?'

  'Not moth-eaten, sir. Only intellectual-like.'

  'You're quite right. A poet.'

  'Poet! It takes all sorts to make a world, don't it now?' said the taximan.

  'And a bloody good world it is,' said Gordon.

  His thoughts moved lyrically tonight. They had another gin and presently went back to the taxi all but arm in arm, after yet another gin. That made five gins Gordon had had this evening. There was an ethereal feeling in his veins; the gin seemed to be flowing there, mingled with his blood. He lay back in the corner of the seat, watching the great blazing skysigns swim across the bluish dark. The evil red and blue of the Neon lights pleased him at this moment. How smoothly the taxi glided! More like a gondola than a car. It was having money that did that. Money greased the wheels. He thought of the evening ahead of him; good food, good wine, good talk-above all, no worrying about money. No damned niggling with sixpences and 'We can't afford this' and 'We can't afford that!' Rosemary and Ravelston would try to stop him being extravagant. But he would shut them up. He'd spend every penny he had if he felt like it. Ten whole q
uid to bust! At least, five quid. The thought of Julia passed flickeringly through his mind and disappeared again.

  He was quite sober when they got to Modigliani's. The monstrous commissionaire, like a great glittering waxwork with the minimum of joints, stepped stiffly forward to open the taxi door. His grim eye looked askance at Gordon's clothes. Not that you were expected to 'dress' at Modigliani's. They were tremendously Bohemian at Modigliani's, of course; but there are ways and ways of being Bohemian, and Gordon's way was the wrong way. Gordon did not care. He bade the taximan an affectionate farewell, and tipped him half a crown over his fare, whereat the commissionaire's eye looked a little less grim. At this moment Ravelston emerged from the doorway. The commissionaire knew Ravelston, of course. He lounged out on to the pavement, a tall distinguished figure, aristocratically shabby, his eye rather moody. He was worrying already about the money this dinner was going to cost Gordon.

  'Ah, there you are, Gordon!'

  'Hullo, Ravelston! Where's Rosemary?'

  'Perhaps she's waiting inside. I don't know her by sight, you know. But I say, Gordon, look here! Before we go in, I wanted-'

  'Ah, look, there she is!'

  She was coming towards them, swift and debonair. She threaded her way through the crowd with the air of some neat little destroyer gliding between large clumsy cargo-boats. And she was nicely dressed, as usual. The sub-shovel hat was cocked at its most provocative angle. Gordon's heart stirred. There was a girl for you! He was proud that Ravelston should see her. She was very gay tonight. It was written all over her that she was not going to remind herself or Gordon of their last disastrous encounter. Perhaps she laughed and talked just a little too vivaciously as Gordon introduced them and they went inside. But Ravelston had taken a liking to her immediately. Indeed, everyone who met her did take a liking to Rosemary. The inside of the restaurant overawed Gordon for a moment. It was so horribly, artistically smart. Dark gate-leg tables, pewter candlesticks, pictures by modern French painters on the walls. One, a street scene, looked like a Utrillo. Gordon stiffened his shoulders. Damn it, what was there to be afraid of? The five pound note was tucked away in its envelope in his pocket. It was Julia's five pounds, of course; he wasn't going to spend it. Still, its presence gave him moral support. It was a kind of talisman. They were making for the corner table-Ravelston's favourite table-at the far end. Ravelston took Gordon by the arm and drew him a little back, out of Rosemary's hearing.

  'Gordon, look here!'

  'What?'

  'Look here, you're going to have dinner with me tonight.'

  'Bosh! This is on me.'

  'I do wish you would. I hate to see you spending all that money.'

  'We won't talk about money tonight,' said Gordon.

  'Fifty-fifty, then,' pleaded Ravelston.

  'It's on me,' said Gordon firmly.

  Ravelston subsided. The fat, white-haired Italian waiter was bowing and smiling beside the corner table. But it was at Ravelston, not at Gordon, that he smiled. Gordon sat down with the feeling that he must assert himself quickly. He waved away the menu which the waiter had produced.

  'We must settle what we're going to drink first,' he said.

  'Beer for me,' said Ravelston, with a sort of gloomy haste. 'Beer's the only drink I care about.'

  'Me too,' echoed Rosemary.

  'Oh, rot! We've got to have some wine. What do you like, red or white? Give me the wine list,' he said to the waiter.

  'Then let's have a plain Bordeaux. Medoc or St Julien or something,' said Ravelston.

  'I adore St Julien,' said Rosemary, who thought she remembered that St Julien was always the cheapest wine on the list.

  Inwardly, Gordon damned their eyes. There you are, you see! They were in league against him already. They were trying to prevent him from spending his money. There was going to be that deadly, hateful atmosphere of 'You can't afford it' hanging over everything. It made him all the more anxious to be extravagant. A moment ago he would have compromised on Burgundy. Now he decided that they must have something really expensive-something fizzy, something with a kick in it. Champagne? No, they'd never let him have champagne. Ah!

  'Have you got any Asti?' he said to the waiter.

  The waiter suddenly beamed, thinking of his corkage. He had grasped now that Gordon and not Ravelston was the host. He answered in the peculiar mixture of French and English which he affected.

  'Asti, sir? Yes, sir. Very nice Asti! Asti Spumanti. Tres fin! Tres vif!'

  Ravelston's worried eye sought Gordon's across the table. You can't afford it! his eye pleaded.

  'Is that one of those fizzy wines?' said Rosemary.

  'Very fizzy, madame. Very lively wine. Tres vif! Pop!' His fat hands made a gesture, picturing cascades of foam.

  'Asti,' said Gordon, before Rosemary could stop him.

  Ravelston looked miserable. He knew that Asti would cost Gordon ten or fifteen shillings a bottle. Gordon pretended not to notice. He began talking about Stendhal-association with Duchesse de Sanseverina and her 'force vin d'Asti'. Along came the Asti in a pail of ice-a mistake, that, as Ravelston could have told Gordon. Out came the cork. Pop! The wild wine foamed into the wide flat glasses. Mysteriously the atmosphere of the table changed. Something had happened to all three of them. Even before it was drunk the wine had worked its magic. Rosemary had lost her nervousness, Ravelston his worried preoccupation with the expense, Gordon his defiant resolve to be extravagant. They were eating anchovies and bread and butter, fried sole, roast pheasant with bread sauce and chipped potatoes; but principally they were drinking and talking. And how brilliantly they were talking-or so it seemed to them, anyway! They talked about the bloodiness of modern life and the bloodiness of modern books. What else is there to talk about nowadays? As usual (but, oh! how differently, now that there was money in his pocket and he didn't really believe what he was saying) Gordon descanted on the deadness, the dreadfulness of the age we live in. French letters and machine-guns! The movies and the Daily Mail! It was a bone-deep truth when he walked the streets with a couple of coppers in his pocket; but it was a joke at this moment. It was great fun-it is fun when you have good food and good wine inside you-to demonstrate that we live in a dead and rotting world. He was being witty at the expense of the modern literature; they were all being witty. With the fine scorn of the unpublished Gordon knocked down reputation after reputation. Shaw, Yeats, Eliot, Joyce, Huxley, Lewis, Hemingway-each with a careless phrase or two was shovelled into the dustbin. What fun it all was, if only it could last! And of course, at this particular moment, Gordon believed that it could last. Of the first bottle of Asti, Gordon drank three glasses, Ravelston two, and Rosemary one. Gordon became aware that a girl at the table opposite was watching him. A tall elegant girl with a shell-pink skin and wonderful, almond-shaped eyes. Rich, obviously; one of the moneyed intelligentsia. She thought him interesting-was wondering who he was. Gordon found himself manufacturing special witticisms for her benefit. And he was being witty, there was no doubt about that. That too was money. Money greasing the wheels-wheels of thought as well as wheels of taxis.

  But somehow the second bottle of Asti was not such a success as the first. To begin with there was uncomfortableness over its ordering. Gordon beckoned to the waiter.

  'Have you got another bottle of this?'

  The waiter beamed fatly. 'Yes, sir! Mais certainement, monsieur!'

  Rosemary frowned and tapped Gordon's foot under the table. 'No, Gordon, no! You're not to.'

  'Not to what?'

  'Order another bottle. We don't want it.'

  'Oh, bosh! Get another bottle, waiter.'

  'Yes, sir.'

  Ravelston rubbed his nose. With eyes too guilty to meet Gordon's he looked at his wine glass. 'Look here, Gordon. Let me stand this bottle. I'd like to.'

  'Bosh!' repeated Gordon.

  'Get half a bottle, then,' said Rosemary.

  'A whole bottle, waiter,' said Gordon.

  After that nothing
was the same. They still talked, laughed, argued, but things were not the same. The elegant girl at the table opposite had ceased watching Gordon. Somehow, Gordon wasn't being witty any longer. It is almost always a mistake to order a second bottle. It is like bathing for a second time on a summer day. However warm the day is, however much you have enjoyed your first bathe, you are always sorry for it if you go in a second time. The magic had departed from the wine. It seemed to foam and sparkle less, it was merely a clogging sourish liquid which you gulped down half in disgust and half in hopes of getting drunk quicker. Gordon was now definitely though secretly drunk. One half of him was drunk and the other half sober. He was beginning to have that peculiar blurred feeling, as though your features had swollen and your fingers grown thicker, which you have in the second stage of drunkenness. But the sober half of him was still in command to outward appearance, anyway. The conversation grew more and more tedious. Gordon and Ravelston talked in the detached uncomfortable manner of people who have had a little scene and are not going to admit it. They talked about Shakespeare. The conversation tailed off into a long discussion about the meaning of Hamlet. It was very dull. Rosemary stifled a yawn. While Gordon's sober half talked, his drunken half stood aside and listened. Drunken half was very angry. They'd spoiled his evening, damn them! with their arguing about that second bottle. All he wanted now was to be properly drunk and have done with it. Of the six glasses in the second bottle he drank four-for Rosemary refused more wine. But you couldn't do much on this weak stuff. Drunken half clamoured for more drink, and more, and more. Beer by the quart and the bucket! A real good rousing drink! And by God! he was going to have it later on. He thought of the five pound note stowed away in his inner pocket. He still had that to blow, anyway.