by Rachel Leigh
It rings twice before he picks up. “It’s about damn time. Where the hell have you been?”
“Something came up that I had to deal with.”
“What could be more important than making sure we don’t spend the rest of our damn lives in prison?”
I could tell him that I’m already in my own personal prison, but I need to have that conversation with Willa first. “Just some shit. Don’t worry about it. Where do we stand? What’s going on?”
“You need to call him.”
Flicking the blinker up, I look both ways at the four-way stop before taking a left to Miner Park. “Who? Anderson?”
“No. Zed. He won’t talk to Talon for obvious reasons. He’s ignoring my calls. You two have always been the closest. We think he’ll reason with you.”
I let out a sarcastic chuckle. “Zed. Reason with someone? Not a chance.”
“Fine, then I guess we just wait until this all blows up in our faces.”
He’s got a point. Zed and I have always been pretty close. That was before he turned on me and used my sexual relationship with Madison against me. Right before Halloween, Zed got shitfaced and decided to crawl through my window like he always does. I should have known better than to leave it unlocked. He dropped on the floor the same time my boxers did while I was standing in front of Madison with my dick in her face.
At that time, I was more pissed that he cock-blocked me. He swore that he’d never say a word. Until he threatened to do just that if I didn’t bring Marni to him. So I got a gun and pointed it at her while I drove her three hours to Briarwood. It was one of my bigger fuckups, but it won’t be my worst—I’m sure of that.
I can already feel the heat of the flame and the last thing we need is for this shit to blow up any more than it already has. “I’ll call him.” I’ve got a few minutes before Willa will be here. We need to try anything at this point. “Hey, I have to finish dealing with….something, but when I’m done, I’m heading back to Talon’s. We need to have a meeting. It’s my round and I’m ready for the games to begin.” I hit the end call button on the dash and shift the car into park in front of the gazebo at Miner Park.
My finger hovers over the call button, then back to my lap. I press it before I can talk myself out of it. “Call Zed.”
“Where are you?” he says after the first ring.
I’m a little stunned that he even answered. Now that he has, I’m not sure if I should be angry or express a need to reason with him. “I’ve been around. Where the hell are you?”
“You wanna talk then meet me somewhere. I’m not doing this shit over the phone.”
“Name the place. I’m there.”
“Lake Ruin behind Miner Point. Thirty minutes.”
I look at the clock on the dash. It would take me at least ten minutes to get there and Willa still isn’t here. This could be our only shot to talk to Zed, so I have to do it. “I’ll be there.” The call drops abruptly.
Where the hell are you, Willa? My eyes dance around the empty park. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I slam my other hand on the steering wheel. She should have been here by now. Fuck it. I shift into reverse then pull away.
6
My eyes dance from the clock on the dash to the road. I’ve got twenty-five minutes to meet Zed. Once again, I find myself in front of the church. Only this time, her car is gone. I didn’t pass any cars on the way here, so she can’t be headed to the park.
Pulling out my phone, I shoot her a quick text then start driving again. When she doesn’t respond, I end up in front of her house. Sure enough, she’s here. She fucking stood me up. The audacity.
Pastor Jeffries already hates me. What have I got to lose? Leaving the car running, I get out and shut the door. All the lights are on inside and I can hear someone talking as I walk up the stone path to her small house.
Willa doesn’t have the luxuries that some of us do. Her parents are successful, but not in the way that most people view success. She’s had a normal family life, with parents who work regular jobs. From the outside looking in, it is a good life. At least it was until her mom left. Everyone claims that she was having an affair, but it’s hard to imagine the pastor’s wife, a librarian, having an affair unless it was with God.
Willa was raised well with a good head on her shoulders. Here I am, the devil incarnate standing on the pastor’s porch because I knocked up his daughter while trying to prove to myself and others that she’d give me her virginity. I took it and I ran. Karma’s a fucking bitch.
The closer I get, the chatter of the people inside gets louder. No longer talking, someone is shouting. A man. It’s Pastor Jeffries and he sounds pissed.
The TV is turned up so loud that Alex Trebek drowns out their words, but something is going on in there. Just as I ball my fist, ready to knock, a loud thud freezes my movements. Pressing my ear to the door, I try to listen.
“You stay away from that boy, he’s the damn devil. You hear me?” Pastor Jeffries shouts.
“Get your hands off me.”
“You listen to your father, damnit!”
“You’re not my father,” Willa cries out.
My eyes widen and my heart begins thudding fiercely in my chest. He better get his hands off of her.
His voice rises to more of a scream. “I am your father. Don’t you ever say that again. I’m the only father you have and you’ll do what I tell you to. If you think you’re gonna run around this town and be a little slut just because your mom’s gone, you’re in for a rude awakening.”
“Ouch! That hurts. Stop.”
An elephant on the other side of this door couldn’t stop me as I barge through it without a clear head. A musty smell floods my senses. Like an antique store. Everything is brown. The walls, the flowers on the old couch, the carpet. It feels like stepping into my great-gran’s living room when I was four years old.
“Get your fucking hands off of her now!” I shout as I charge at the two of them. He has her wrists pinned over her head against the wall. Tears trail down Willa’s cheeks and something inside of me ignites into a full-blown rage as I take the old man down. With my hands wrapped around his throat, we crash into an end table that breaks. My head slams against a lamp and although I can feel the warmth of blood soak my hair, I feel no pain.
“Lars, stop!” Willa screeches. “Please. You’ll make it worse.” Her hands wrap around my arm as she tries to pull me up, but I’m focused on my fingers that snake around his neck. Something doesn’t allow me to stop as I squeeze harder and harder. My mind goes blank and my thoughts are irrational. When I get to this state, nothing good can come of it. Stop, Lars. Just fucking stop. I try to talk myself down from the ledge before I jump and there’s no going back.
“Lars, please.” Willa kneels next to me, her voice calm and...comforting. I look over at her tear-stained cheeks and my grip lessens. “He’s not worth it.” She pulls my arm until we’re both standing up. Her fingers slide down into to my hand as our eyes stay locked. “Come on.”
Snapping myself out of the trance I was in, I let her lead me out of the house. My staggered breaths begin to steady when we step outside. “What the hell was that all about?” I huff. We continue to walk before Willa stops and lets her hand free from its clutch around my arm.
“It’s complicated. You should go.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I’m not leaving you here with that animal.”
“I can’t go with you, Lars. It will just make things worse.”
“Willa,” I say, as I place both hands on either side of her shoulders. I wanna ask if he hits her. If he’s always this cruel to her, but what place do I have to ask such a personal question? “We still need to have that talk.” I tilt my head toward my car. “Come with me. It won’t take long.”
Glancing from me to the house while she chews on her bottom lip, she shivers. It’s mid-December and she’s standing here barefoot in a T-shirt and a pair of fuzzy pink pajama pants. I tear the sweatshirt over my head an
d wrap it around her shoulders, surprising us both. “What are you doing?” she asks.
“You’re cold. Now, come on. I have to go somewhere. We can talk on the ride.” I wrap an arm around her and try to coerce her to the car, but she still puts up resistance.
She looks down at her feet. “But, I don’t have any shoes.”
“Don't need any.” I give her a pull again, and this time, she obliges. I’ve always known that Willa can be easily persuaded. It’s not just me. She’s been pushed around her entire life. Now it appears that school isn’t her only battlefield. I had her home life pegged all wrong. There’s a war going on inside that house, and for some unknown reason, I feel like I need to be her shield. I’m just not so sure that’s a good idea, because who will protect her from me? Good intentions or not, I’m my own worst enemy and I’ve been at war with myself for the past nine years.
Once we’re inside, I crank up the heat and Willa tightly hugs my sweatshirt. “You ok?” I ask her.
She looks over at me and smiles. It’s the same smile she wore that night. The genuinely happy one. It makes me wonder if it was as fake then as it is now. “I’m fine.”
“Do you always smile through pain? Because I’m not sure how you can be fine after what I just walked in on.”
“It was nothing. He just gets upset sometimes.”
“Sometimes? So this wasn’t the first time this has happened? Does he frequently pin you to the wall and scream in your face?”
When her head turns to face the passenger window and she squeezes the sweatshirt tighter, I assume I’ve gone too far. It just doesn’t make sense. It’s Pastor Jeffries. A man of God and someone I always assumed was one of the kindest people in our town. There’s no doubt that I’ve felt judged by him, but he’s also well aware of what I did to his daughter. Amongst other shenanigans growing up. Such as drinking behind the church because we figured we’d never get caught back there.
“It’s ok. I don’t let it get to me. I’m planning on moving out before I have the baby, anyways.”
“Oh yeah? Where ya going?” She turns to look at me, and nervousness washes over her face. Once again, she’s chewing on her bottom lip. “Well? Where do you plan on going?” I stop looking at her and hope that maybe she will relax a bit without my eyes on her.
“Far away from Redwood. I plan to leave and never come back.”
My foot slams on the break so hard that both of our heads jerk forward. “What the hell do you mean you’re leaving Redwood? Have you forgotten that you’re having a baby? A baby you claim is mine?”
“I know,” she says the words so calmly that I wanna shake her and tell her to stop being so damn calm and nice. “When I told you that I was pregnant, you never let me finish talking. You just took off and left me sitting in the parking lot at the warehouse. I am leaving Redwood.”
“Like hell you are.” I huff, before pressing the gas and continuing the drive.
“Yes, I am.”
“Noooo, you’re not. Jesus. Quit acting like a child.”
She chuckles. “Me? You’re the one acting like a child. You think you can just dictate everyone’s lives because your family has money and power. Or because your friends are scary.”
“My friends are pretty scary.” My head shakes. “That’s beside the point. I’m not trying to dictate your life. You’re having a baby. You’re not just gonna take off and move away where you have no help. Who will support you?”
“I don’t need anyone. I’ve taken care of myself my whole life. Why would I need anyone now?”
This might be harsh, but it’s true and it needs to be said. “Willa, you have no fucking money. You won’t survive on your own.”
“I know I won’t,” she says again, just as calm and collected. “That’s why I need your help. This baby is just as much yours as it is mine and it’s only natural that I’d expect you to support him or her financially.”
“If this baby is mine, as you claim it is, I have every intention of doing the right thing.” My voice rises unintentionally. “I just need you to tell me what the right thing is because I don’t have a fucking clue, Willa.”
“I need you to give me enough money to leave and never come back.”
Something unfamiliar ripples through me. “No,” I say, without hesitation. She’s not leaving.
“No?” she questions.
“For the last time, no.”
“Lars,” her voice becomes tranquil and desperate, “I can’t stay here. I just can’t. If Rick finds out that I’m pregnant, he’ll force me to have an abortion and he’ll…I just can’t stay.”
“He’ll do what? Hit you?” I look over at her, but she avoids eye contact. “Is that what he does? Is he abusive?”
“He’s just very unpredictable and I’m not safe there,” she chokes out. “Tell me you’ll help me leave, Lars. I’m giving you an out. I’ll never ask for anything else from you again, I swear. No one even has to know I’m pregnant.”
Unsure of how I feel about this, I remain quiet. I can feel her eyes burn into the side of my face but keep mine on the road.
I take a sharp left down the beaten path that leads behind Miner Point and hope like hell that I make it without getting stuck or bottoming out.
Willa looks around, taking in the surroundings. “Where are we going?”
“I have to meet up with someone really quick. It won’t take long.” Tapping the brake, I slow the car down as we both bounce in our seats from the uneven terrain.
Bringing Willa out here isn’t my best move, but it was a last-minute decision to get her away from her stepdad, Rick. I know damn well that Zed is going to question this shit if he sees her, so I need to keep my car back and her face hidden.
“This is Lake Ruin. Where they found Josh Moran’s car. This place gives me the creeps.”
You and me both, Willa. You and me both.
We’re on the opposite side of the lake where we pushed the car over, but being here brings back harrowing memories. It feels like yesterday when we were so sure we’d get away with our illegal acts. We’re not caught yet, though. Hopefully I’ll leave here with some reassurance that we never will be.
Willa leans forward in her seat. “Is that Zed King?”
Pressing the brake, I stop the car far enough away that Zed can’t see inside and Willa won’t be able to hear our conversation. “Stay here. I’ll be right back.” Grazing her fingertips on the cross that dangles over her shirt, she drops back in the seat. I leave the car running and climb out, shutting the door behind me.
When Zed starts heading in my direction, I hold up a hand. “Stay there. I’m coming.”
“Who’s that?” He tips his head with his eyes on the car behind me. I look back and notice that the dash light hasn’t timed out yet. I’m a fucking idiot.
Inside, Willa sits with her eyes zeroed in on us.
Turning back, I look at him. “It’s nobody.” Zed still looks the exact same, aside from a little stubble on his chin. Still has that crazed look in his eyes and tick to his fingers as they hang at his side.
“Doesn’t look like nobody. Looks like Willa Mack. What the hell are you doing with that girl? Doesn’t she hate your ass after what you did to her?”
“Forget about her. I wanna know what the hell your deal is? What the fuck is going on with you, Zed?”
Looking over my shoulder, he completely ignores me. “She’s trouble, man.”
“Willa and trouble don’t even belong in the same sentence.”
“I bet she’s just as screwed up as her old man. Fucking entitled prick. He thinks that just because he’s a pastor we all have to bow to him.” He looks right through me as he talks. A dead stare on Willa.
Snapping my fingers in his face, I break his gaze. “I said forget about her.”
“Wanna make another bet?” he smirks.
“Fuck no, I don’t wanna make another bet.” I don’t even have to think twice about that one. “The last time I did, you assholes blasted
my win all over the damn town. I wouldn’t trust you with my dog, and he died three years ago.”
A sinister smirk dons his face. “Actually, it was only me. I just let Tommy and Talon take some of the credit, or blame rather.” Taking a step forward, his smile grows. “It’ll be a good one.”
“What the hell do you want, Zed?”
“I’ll tell you where Josh’s body is right now if you let me have a little taste of your girlfriend.”
“She’s not my girlfriend.” I grit through my teeth.
“Madison isn’t gonna be happy about this. You running around with Willa is sure to piss her off. So, just give Willa to me and we can prevent Madison from tearing her to shreds.”
“You really are delusional, aren’t you?”
“What? You don’t think she’d want me? Come on, if she let you take her v-card, surely she’ll give me seconds.”
All the blood rushes to my head as my hands plant firmly against his chest and I shove him backwards. “Stay the fuck away from her.”
Regaining his balance, he steps up to me. Nose to nose. “Or what?” When I don’t respond, he pushes further. “Or what, Titan? You’ll kill me? You don’t have it in you?” My fists ball at my side and I bite down as I try to gain some self-control. “You kill the innocent, not the guilty.”
I’m not even sure when he went down. All I know is my fists continue to fly through the air, one punch after another, as blood falls freely from my white knuckles. Zed’s arms cover his face as he attempts to block me, but the punches keep landing.
“He fell. I didn’t fucking kill him.” I scream loudly, but all I can hear is the sound of my knuckles meeting his body. I’m not sure where they land, but the numbness in my hands tells me that I’m making contact. My heart beats violently in my chest as the words he said replay in my mind. You kill the innocent, not the guilty. “I didn’t kill him. He fell in the pool.” I repeat again. “He should have been more careful.” I shout so loudly that the words echo through my own ears and vibrate in my chest.
