by Rachel Leigh
Gentle hands wrap around me and that calming voice that I always want to ruffle up rings through the deafening screams inside my head. “Stop, Lars. He’s not worth it.” She repeats herself. “He’s not worth it.” She’s so tranquil and unaffected. But this time, I welcome her calm. Getting to my feet, I turn and look at her blank expression. So unaffected by my outburst and the blood that drips from my fingers. She takes my hand in hers and leads me back to the car. I don’t even look back as Zed lies there on the cold ground—speechless, motionless.
Willa leads me over to the passenger side of my car and before I even realize what’s going on, she opens the door. I snap out of the trance I was in and look at her. “What are you doing?”
“I’ll drive. You’re too worked up right now.”
“No, I’m fine.” I push past her, but she grabs me by the forearm. My eyes skate down to where her fingers tangle around the bare skin of my arm, then back up to her eyes. They widen as they stare back at me and her grip on me releases abruptly.
“I’m...I’m sorry.” Her body twists around and she slides in the passenger seat, suddenly looking fearful and scared.
“It’s ok.” I press my palms to the door frame and my head droops forward, so I can see her face. Though she’s not looking at me. She’s watching Zed as he climbs to his feet and dusts himself off. “You really wanna drive?”
“He’s coming.” She grabs the seatbelt and fastens it. “Get in. Hurry. He’s coming.” She huffs in a panic.
Slouching down, I level with her. “Don’t be scared. I’d never let Zed hurt you.”
A surrealness washes over her and her head turns slowly. “You mean that?”
“Absolutely.” I stand back up and shut the door.
She keeps a watchful eye on Zed, who is standing about twenty feet in front of the car. He looks zombified and unnerved, but we both know this isn’t finished. I came here for a reason. Rounding the car, I make my way back over to him. “You ready to talk about what we came here for?”
“You cut my fucking head,” he says in a monotone voice.
“You’re lucky I didn’t cut your throat.”
“You like her, don’t you?” he chuckles. “Lars Titan, falling for the pastor’s daughter. I was curious how far my words would carry before you reacted, and now I know. You like her.”
“I’m not falling for her. She just needs my help. Now, enough about Willa. What do you want?”
“It’s simple really. I want my revenge.”
“It’s not your turn.”
“Then make it my turn. Unless you want cops showing up at all your houses and a body hidden in one of your basements, you’ll make it happen.”
If that’s all he wants, we can make it happen. I’m a little fearful of what he has in store and I sure as hell hope the good lord has mercy on whoever he’s after, because Zed is ruthless. No matter who or what it is, we made a deal, so all four of us have to do our part, even if Zed doesn’t deserve our help. The pact remains, four acts of revenge, we stick together from start to finish and everything in between. “Let’s say we did, who’s your target?”
Tipping his head forward, he stares straight past me. “Her.”
I turn around and look at the innocent girl sitting in my car. “What do you mean, her?”
“It all starts with her.” He pats a hand to my back and walks away. Slowly fading into the dark. I stand there frozen until I hear the roar of his engine. Once his brake lights come on and dirt kicks up behind him, I look at Willa who is watching me with wonder. A flawless girl with a realness about her. She doesn’t pretend, nor falter. I just told her I’d never let Zed hurt her. Now I have to make a choice. Her or them.
7
Lost. That’s the best word I’d use to describe Lars Titan. Born with a silver spoon in his mouth and the body of a Greek god, he’s never had to want for anything. Yet, he stands out there idly with his hands in his pockets and a gazillion thoughts running rampant in his mind. He talks in circles and never finishes a conversation. Barely smiles, and almost always has his fists balled at his side. Like he’s on the verge of fighting the world because he feels like it’s against him.
I don’t know much about Lars, but I know enough. I’ve watched him for years. I’ve caught glimpses of his blank stare enough times to know that he puts on this show of a perfect life. His life isn’t as perfect as he wants us to think it is. In fact, I’m pretty sure he lives in his own misery.
A guy who practically had me on my knees begging to be noticed. He just stepped over me and kept on walking—but not before kicking me and laughing about it with the entire town. Jokes on him. Yep, Lars was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, but now he gets to feed me from it.
Lars walks quickly to the driver’s side and climbs in, shutting the door behind him and wasting no time to drive us out of here. “Sorry about that. Just had to take care of some unfinished business with Zed.”
Stretching over the seat, my fingers graze the cut on his head from his first brawl of the night with Rick. He shrieks at my touch, and I retreat quickly. “Sorry. You need to clean that up, though. It looks sorta deep.”
“It’s just a scratch. I’ll be fine.”
“Is everything else ok?”
“Yeah. Just some shit we’ve been dealing with. How are you? You good?” He glances in my direction. The light of the dash casts off his gorgeous face and I have to remind myself that the devil was once an angel. His beautiful exterior no longer masks his black heart. I see right through it.
“We really need to finish our conversation from earlier.”
“Yeah. About that. You really think that leaving Redwood is the best plan?”
“I don’t think. I know. I have to leave. Staying is not an option.” He’ll never understand. He’ll also never know why I need to leave. No one can ever know. I have to get as far away from here as possible. Rick will never allow me to keep my baby, and I’ll never allow him to try and stop me.
“Come back to Talon’s for the night. Sleep on it and we can talk more tomorrow.”
I chuckle unintentionally. “Me? Stay at Talon Porter’s? Not a chance.”
“You got a problem with Talon?”
I absolutely have a problem with Talon. As a matter of fact, I have a problem with all four of these guys. Naturally, I hate them all. After the humiliation I went through, just so they could get a good laugh. Anyone would hate them for what they did. But I don’t say it. “No, no problem. I just don’t feel comfortable staying there. Just take me home and we can both sleep on it.”
“You can’t go home. Are you forgetting that your stepdad attacked you?”
“He didn’t attack me. He was just mad. He gets like that sometimes. I’ll be fine. I’ve dealt with him for years.” I don’t mention that I keep a knife under my pillow. Or that I had to use it once.
“Are you sure? It doesn’t seem safe. What if next time he hurts the baby, or you?”
“He won’t hurt me. I swear. I have to go home, though. If I don’t then he’ll call the cops.” He’s done it before. Played it off like a concerned parent. Fortunately, my own reputation precedes me and everyone in this town thinks I’m a good girl. It’s not a lie. I am good, at least I try to be. But someone taught me not too long ago that being nice only makes you appear weak. What these people don’t know is that I grew a backbone and I’ll never let anyone break me again.
“Alright. If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure. Can we talk after class tomorrow?”
“How about if we meet at the park after dark? Make a plan for what’s coming.”
“You mean, a baby?” I look over at him. He raises a brow in question. “A baby, that’s what’s coming.” I don’t think he fully grasps what I’m trying to tell him. It’s like he doesn’t believe that I’m pregnant, or he doesn’t want to.
“Yeah. That’s what I meant. We can talk about the baby.” He pulls up in front of my house and turns his body toward me. “But Will
a, this has to stay between us for now. All of it. We can’t let this news spread like wildfire. People can be….harsh.”
“I know. I haven’t told anyone and I don’t plan to. I told you, I’m leaving Redwood.”
“That also means that we have to carry on like normal for a while. Ya know, keep our distance like we usually do.”
“Ah, ok.” Makes sense now. He doesn’t want to be seen fraternizing with the pastor’s quiet stepdaughter. I push open the door with no hesitation. “Don’t worry, Lars. Your reputation is safe.” Then I slam it shut and walk briskly up the path to the house.
I don’t even turn around to look at him as my heart shatters into tiny pieces. What’s left of it, anyway. The other pieces are still lying in Tommy’s bed from the last time he broke it. Some are scattered around this house from the months of abuse I’ve had to swallow. Pretty sure Mom took a few chunks with her when she fled and left me here to endure the wrath of her monstrous husband. I’ve laid in bed often wondering how Mom couldn’t possibly know what goes on between the walls of this house. Maybe she just didn’t want to admit it because admission would mean guilt on her behalf. Doesn’t matter, anyway. All hearts break. I just have to smile through the pain, pretend like nothing is wrong, and bide my time until I can get as far away as possible.
Gulping down the lump in my throat, I close my eyes and say a silent prayer. Please, God. Please let him be asleep.
Holding my breath, I listen intently. It’s so quiet it’s eerie. Even my heartbeat sounds like thunder ripping through the room. Tip-toeing ever so gently, I startle myself by the creak of the old floorboards as I pass through the dining room. Pushing open my bedroom door, I step inside. Shutting the door, then locking it, I make sure the deadbolt is secure.
Rubbing my hand over my belly, I whisper, “Soon. This will all be over soon.”
I’m sound asleep when a gentle tapping noise startles me awake. It starts off like the tap of rain against the glass window, but quickly escalates into a repetitive pounding that has me up and on my feet quickly.
Stepping closer to the window, I watch for any type of movement behind the closed curtain. Taking the end into my hand, ready to pull it back hastily, I gasp when a dark shadow darts past the window. Ripping it open, I look left and right to try and catch a glimpse of the perpetrator, but whoever it is, is long gone. Was it just my imagination? I run my hands over my face and keep my eyes fixated on the lawn. Afraid to blink out of fear of missing something, or rather, someone. No. It wasn’t my imagination. Someone was definitely out there.
Pulling the curtain closed, I climb back into bed. With my back pressed against the cold metal bars, I keep my eyes wide open. Afraid to close them, worried that I’ll fall asleep and wake up to someone at the end of my bed.
Glancing over at the old clock on my nightstand, it reads two-twenty. I watch as the minutes tick by and the next thing I know, I’m waking up to the buzzing of my alarm. Slapping my hand to it a few times until it stops, I immediately get out of bed and walk back over to the window, pulling the curtain open.
Was it all a dream? Watching, waiting, looking for some sort of evidence that I didn’t imagine it, my eyes catch something on the glass of the window. A handprint—but it’s not just any handprint. It’s coated with chunks of dirt and debris and it looks like whoever did it, dipped their hand in mud before slapping it on my window. Chills slither down my spine as I try and wrap my head around who would have come here, and why. Though, it’s terrifying, it’s also reassuring that I’m not losing my mind.
8
Meeting up with Zed last night wasn’t a total waste of time. Even though his requests are irrational, we have a start. As of right now, the ball is in our court and we don’t have to worry about a body turning up—at least for the time being.
“Willa Mack?” Tommy says as he shakes his head in confusion. “Who the hell could he possibly be after that he can get to through Willa fucking Mack?”
“It’s Pastor Jeffries.” Talon chimes in from behind the couch where we sit. Tommy and I both turn around to look at him. His expression is bleak as he recants himself. “I mean, I assume it’s Pastor Jeffries. Who else would it be?”
Tommy chuckles. “Why in the world would Zed, or anyone for that matter, have beef with a damn pastor?”
“Ya know. The guy is a sort of douche. Last night—” My words trail off when I realize what I’m about to say. They can’t know that I was with Willa. They’ll start asking questions that I’m not ready to answer, because I don’t even know the answers myself. “Last night I saw him outside of the church and he was yelling at Willa. Looked pretty pissed.” It’s not all a lie. He did yell at Willa, but it wasn’t outside the church. It was in her living room while he had her arms pinned over her head and pressed against the wall.
Tommy kicks his feet off the coffee table in front of us and gets up. “Well, I’ve gotta get to school. You guys talk about the next phase of our plan—whatever our plan is—and we’ll catch up tonight.” He focuses his attention on me and smirks. “You going to your ballet class today?”
Grabbing a pillow sitting next to me, I chuck it at him. “Fuck off. It’s drama class. No one fucking dances.” Not exactly true. There’s actually a lot of dancing and singing and all-too chipper faces. I’m not sure how people can be that damn happy all the time. It’s a struggle for me to even fake a smile, yet everyone in that class is always smiling and happy. Everyone except for Willa. She’s always so sad. I always thought she had the perfect life, but I’m starting to wonder if her internal scars match ours. I suppose that, deep down, we’re all a little broken, battered, and bruised. Those who pretend they’re not, are doing just that—pretending.
“Dude.” Talon snaps his fingers in my face. “Where the hell did you go just now?”
With wide eyes, I snap out of it and realize that Tommy has already left. “Huh?”
“I said your stepsister just pulled up. Get rid of her so we can finish this shit before I have to meet Marni at her dad’s.”
Standing up, I walk over to the window and sure as shit, Madison is stepping out of her pearly white Aston Martin that my generous father bought her for her birthday. “Fucking great,” I mutter under my breath.
“What’s up with that girl lately? She keeps popping up all over the place.”
“She’s psycho. That’s what’s up.” I tear the door open and step outside. My bare feet hit the bone-dry porch and I hurry over to the steps to stop her from coming any closer to the house. The last thing I need is for her to get comfortable here. This is my safe haven. I come here to get away from her and everyone else that I have no interest in being around. “What do you want, Madison?”
“You.” She replies point-blankly.
“Don’t you have class?”
“I do, but I’d rather see you. Thought maybe I’d skip the first period and we could talk.” Her fingers trail up my bare arm, but I slap them away.
“We have nothing to talk about. Go to school.” I turn around to walk away in hopes that by the time I get to the door she’s gone. My fingers linger around the handle, and when I feel the weight of her body come up behind me, I spin around. Clutching her shoulders, I pull her close. “Are you fucking stupid, Madison? I said go!”
Completely unmoved by my outburst, her fruitless expression digs deeper into me, pulling out a newfound rage and fury, and for a moment, I consider shoving her down the stairs. It wouldn’t kill her, but it would paint her a nice picture of how she makes me feel inside.
“I just wanna spend some time with you, Lars. Why are you being so cruel?” Her words come out seductive and sweet, when she’s anything but.
“This has to fucking end.” I give her a gentle shove. Just enough to backstep away from her before I do something I’ll regret.
“I hope it never ends.” Her cold fingers slither up the front of my shirt. My back steels as she presses her chin to my collarbone. “In fact, I want us to last forever.”
> My eyes close and my jaw locks. Holding my hands out on either side of me, I refrain from touching her. “This is going too far.”
Stepping closer, if that’s even possible, her mouth ghosts mine. Her tongue darts out, sweeping across my bottom lip. “Is this about her?”
I tilt my head back and look into her turquoise eyes. “Who?”
“Willa. I know you were with her last night. What I don’t understand is why. It’s not like you could possibly be into that girl. She’s practically married to God. And you, well, you’re a murderer. It won’t end well.”
My heart rate suddenly excels and sweat begins to pool at my hairline. I grab her by the arm and pull her to the end of the porch. Gritting through my teeth, I whisper, “I’ve told you over and over again that we didn’t kill Josh. Now quit fucking saying that.”
“Uh huh. You said what you said, but I don't buy it. Why else would you go through the hell of scooping his dead body off the road?”
“As I’ve also told you time and time again, it’s not your damn business.” Drawing in a deep breath, I try to reason with this unreasonable girl. “Look, I’ll give you all the money you want if you just move to Colorado with your dad and never set foot in Redwood again. Name the price. It’s yours.”
“It’s not money I want.” Her hand stretches down between us and my body jolts when she gets a firm grip on my dick. “I want this, and this.” Her opposite hand pats my chest. “That’s all.”
I’ve given Madison every inch of me, aside from my heart. She’s consumed my thoughts more times than I care to admit. I’ve fed her my dick more times than I can count. And, I’ve tasted every part of her body in return. But she will never have my heart. She’s not even in it. What started off as fun and games and a little crush on my stepsister has developed into pure loathing. She’s never going to give up.
Talon pulls open the door, and I jerk away from Madison before he steps outside. “Everything ok out here?”
