Forbidden Love: Book 1 in the Mackenzie Series (Leave Me Breathless World)

by Elizabeth Knox

  “You asked why I didn’t have photos of your grandmother in the house. It’s quite simple. I couldn’t risk it. Not if other families’ were to come here. They’d be able to see how Maeve slightly resembles my mother.”

  “She is your mother,” I spit at him, even more rageful than I ever could’ve imagined.

  “Watch your tongue, Liam. It’s natural to be shocked and a bit angry, but it’s best you remember this was done to not only protect me, but give me the life I wanted.”

  “You’re Clodagh Mackenzie and you wanted to be a maid?” I question.

  “No one ever wishes to be a maid. I didn’t have a choice. I could’ve either been shipped off and hidden like your dear sisters, or I could stay here in my family’s home and assume the identity of no one of importance. I wanted to be around my children, Liam. I wanted to watch you grow up.”

  “You were imprisoned to a life you didn’t want.” I mutter, shaking my head in disbelief.

  “I wanted this life more than anything, Liam. It gave me the ability to be here, with my family, for every single day. I wasn’t a prisoner, sweetheart. I’ve been happy.”

  I continue shaking my head, hating how many lies we’ve been keeping from our own family. Surely, they could’ve said something before now. The only reason they’ve even said a damn thing is because my mother will most likely be waking from her coma.

  Maeve, or . . . my grandmother . . . rises from her seat on the couch and walks over to me. She places the palms of her hands against my cheeks. “Liam, I know you don’t understand it, but I made sacrifices in order to ensure I was here, always. It’s why I never leave, why I always stay on the grounds. Living a life without my family would be my prison, so this is the cross I bear, cooking meals and appearing as household staff. It’s okay m’love.”

  “You should be a woman who’s respected as a Mackenzie, not a servant.”

  She chuckles lowly. “For a time, I was even more feared than your grandfather. He’d be rolling around in his grave if he knew what I just said. But it’s true. Being Maeve . . . is kind of like retirement. I was able to retire from being the matriarch of a mafia family. It was time, sweetheart. Please don’t be angry.”

  I look up to her and try my best not to be upset. “I’ve been lied to yet again. How do you expect me to act? God, I wish I knew this my entire life. As a child—”

  “You would’ve went and told all your little friends.” She interjects, shaking her finger at me. “Don’t even start down this path, child. The past is the past. We won’t follow that route. We’ll move forward as a family because that’s what we’ve always done. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m exhausted. Luca, m’dear, are you alright?”

  She looks behind her over to my cousin, who gives her a nod. “It’s a lot to process, but I’ll be fine.”

  Grandmother giggles, while walking over to the door. “Oh, you’re so much like your father. It’s uncanny.” She exits the room and leaves the three of us to our own silence, all looking at the other.

  Now I’m wondering what other bombs will be dropped.

  41

  “Because I love you, I will find a way to be your light, even at my darkest.”

  ~ Jessica Katoff

  Caprice

  Two weeks have passed before my very eyes. Liam and I flew to London to see a specialist who’s helping me return my forehead to as normal as it would’ve been before the accident. At least, that’s what we’re referring to it as.

  It’s a pretty long road, but it’ll be one that we’ll have to take one step at a time. From the looks of it, multiple skin grafts are going to be placed over the wound in an effort to try and make it look somewhat decent. The specialist said he didn’t want to seem too optimistic, but if all goes well I should just have a simple scar that I can cover up with foundation and concealer. I only hope he’s right. I’m finding it troublesome to even look in the mirror when washing my face. To top it off, I’ve been putting bohemian style wraps around my forehead so no one has to look at the ugliness of what was done to me.

  Yesterday, a few men came in a decked out van. It had bulletproof glass, tinted windows, and a couple men who didn’t appear to be part of a security team. They were in scrubs, looking over paperwork and talking to both Cecilia and Desmond quite a bit.

  Liam told me a couple hours ago how Sofia is being transported to downtown Dublin today for a series of tests. However, he has a security team going with her, and even he is going too. He wants to hear it straight from the horse’s mouth as Liam told me.

  “I heard your father’s been seen in London.” Liam says from out of nowhere, reading his newspaper.

  “Really? What’s he doing there?”

  My husband scoffs, “Up to trouble no doubt. Have you heard anything?”

  “About?” I question, not sure where he’s going with this conversation.

  “Have any of your brothers reached out to you?”

  “No, why would they?” I reply.

  “I’ve heard rumors about your father interfering in Clan business, the Romanians. I wasn’t sure if one of your brothers would reach out to you and give you details.”

  “You mean for you to use as an advantage? No, they’re not dumb. Giving me information like that would only serve as a death sentence for them.”

  He nods, “You’re right. I . . . I do need to tell you something else, though. Something I should’ve told you after we found you, but I wanted you to focus on healing.”

  My stomach drops. “What happened? Something must’ve happened.”

  Liam takes in a breath and nods again, “I’m sure you were wondering how Sergei knew where you were. Now, I don’t want you to be upset. Because you’re okay and things could’ve been much worse. Francesca had reached out to Alessandra again, and Alessandra, being the young woman that she is wanted to talk to Francesca. I believe Francesca was baiting Alessandra into giving her more information, and after the call Alessandra immediately told Luca. Although, it was too late because you were already taken.”

  I shake my head in disbelief, telling Al plenty of times what Francesca is really like. She’s the type of woman who would, without a doubt, toss one of us in front of her to save herself.

  “She wants her family to be on good terms, Caprice. She knows it won’t ever happen, but you can’t blame the girl for dreaming about it.”

  “I told her time and time again how Francesca is nothing but a cancer. Did she think I was lying to her, that I said those things to her to be mean? No, I said them because it’s true. Fuck!”

  “I know,” Liam rises from his seat by the window, placing his paper down on the table beside his chair and approaches me. “But sweetheart, she’s young. I think deep down she only wants to be part of a normal family, to have a connection with those who share her blood, and she isn’t wrong for wanting that.”

  “No, of course she isn’t. But, it won’t happen. Our family isn’t normal and they’ll end up hurting her more than helping her. Why can’t Alessandra see that? I mean really, Liam, why is it so hard to see?”

  Liam kneels down in front of me and takes my hand in his, “Because we want to believe the best when it comes to the people we love. You can’t blame her for that.”

  I run my hand through my hair, baffled, wishing my sister could act like more of an adult at times. “I wish she saw the world for what it truly is.”

  Liam’s hand comes to my cheek and he cups my face. “I don’t believe that for a second. You don’t want the horrors of our world to destroy her innocence, not when it’s already taken so much from you.”

  “She doesn’t see what’s been done. Sometimes I still think she believes our father is a good man, and while we make strides in our relationship, her feelings about our father will always cause there to be a divide between us.”

  Liam removes his hand and sucks in his bottom lip. It makes me believe he’s deep in thought. “Then why don’t you tell her the truth, about all of it? Alessandra is a woman now
. She should know the truth, and then she can make an educated decision about how she feels when it comes to your father. And I mean the entire truth, not just about Pippa. We both know there’s more you haven’t told her.”

  “Yeah, I’d never thought about it.” I murmur, confessing my thoughts.

  “You never had an option before, not until you were both in Ireland that is.” He gently reminds me, offering a slight smile. “I often hope our marriage has given you a new opportunity to live a happier life. There have been a lot of things going on, but we will reunite you with Pippa. I don’t care if it takes years, Caprice. I will swear it on my sisters’ lives, we will get your daughter back.”

  I rise up from the armchair I’ve been sitting in, somewhat pushing Liam out of the way. He stands up as I do and I begin to walk over to the entryway. “Where’re you off to?”

  “I’m going to have a much needed chat with my sister, and hope it causes her to understand me a bit more. My biggest fear is we’ll have this divide between us our entire lives. You’re right though, Liam. She deserves to know the truth.” I contemplate waiting for a reply from him, but decide to head out of the house and over to where Luca’s apartment is on the property. The time for secrets has come to an end.

  42

  “You were always mine, and I just had to find you.”

  ~ R.H. Sin

  Liam

  2 months later . . .

  “Liam, your father wants you to go into his office.” My grandmother tells me. I glance out back into the garden and see Caprice is with her sister. It’s a lovely day and they only need a soft cardigan to keep them warm from the slight chill in the air.

  Ever since Caprice had the long needed chat with her sister about the horrors she experienced at the hands of their father, their relationship has blossomed into something they never thought it would be. Alessandra did know about Pippa, but what she didn’t know was about the countless other things Gabriele did to Caprice. Sure, they’re sisters, but now they’re so much more because of how open they’ve both been to each other. I’d call them best friends, though they’d never hear me say such a thing.

  “I’ll be down in just a moment,” I reply to my grandmother, watching her walk off.

  Things have been fairly quiet on every front. Especially with Gabriele. I haven’t so much as heard a peep from the spies we have lurking around. They’re seasoned Mackenzie men, so I know they’re loyal as can be. It seems the old man is simply staying cooped up. I know better than to believe he isn’t stirring up any trouble.

  Heading out of the room, I walk into the corridor and don’t even bother knocking when approaching my father’s office door. Instead, I place my hand on the knob, turn it, and enter. After I shut the door firmly behind me, I look up to a frightening sight.

  His glasses are half-way down his nose and he’s pinching his temple in frustration. His eyebrows are furrowed in stress and even though I don’t know what’s caused my father to be this way, I do know it can’t be good.

  “Is everything okay with Mum?” I question, asking about my stepmother. She might not be my biological-mum, but I love her as though she is. Hell, I think my biological-mum would’ve loved her, especially when we consider everything she’d done for me as a wee lad.

  “Yes, she’s doing great.” Father sent her to a home in the country, away from us, incase people were watching. We do have hired guards watching her twenty-four seven and at this point she is awake. Though, she needs 24/7 support. She has to learn to walk again, speak again, and so much more. The hope is that in the next coming months she will begin making great strides in remembering things. Father doesn’t even know if she knows who we are. Though, she doesn’t communicate often. He goes up to see her once a week, but doesn’t go more than that because he’s so worried about people watching him. We don’t want to tip Valentin off about her being alive. Hell, Father hasn’t even told Alejandro, Rafael, or Roman she’s awake. Though, I did beg him to keep it quiet. We didn’t need Rafael coming here, especially with Caprice living in the house.

  “Then tell me what’s caused you to look so stressed.” I state, walking closer to his desk.

  He huffs, rubbing his hands over his head and looks at me with grief. “Liam, there isn’t any easy way for me to say this. My contact in Mexico tells me there isn’t any girl at Rafael’s estates. She went to every one of his homes to try and locate her, even questioning the staff but no one will say a thing.”

  “Do not sit across from me and say we’ve come to a dead end.” I hiss, balling my hands into fists on his desk.

  “Not quite. I just received a call. I’ve been invited to an auction.”

  I cock a brow. “What type of auction?”

  “Rafael is going up for sale it seems.”

  “You can’t be serious.” I mutter.

  “I’m afraid this isn’t a joke. A MC in America is behind it, as well as Mariana Petran.”

  He said this isn’t a joke and yet I feel like it must be. “Why is the Queen of the Romanian Mafia interested in Rafael?”

  My father shrugs in his seat. “I wish I knew, but I have no idea. I can only assume he had some hand to play in either her parents’ death, her kidnapping, her daughter’s kidnapping . . . there’s such a long list to go down with her. The poor child has been through so much.”

  “Jesus. There’s no lead on Pippa?” I fall back into the seat behind me as my emotions seep in. I feel like I’ve failed my wife. I told her we’d get her daughter back . . . and look. We have nothing.

  He shakes his head, confirming what I already know. “I don’t have any solid proof the child was ever with him. Is there anything Caprice could’ve left out, or that she might know?”

  “No, she told me everything and I relayed it to you. I just don’t understand this. I don’t see how a man like him would just give up his child . . . this doesn’t make sense.”

  “He could be hiding her, like we’ve been hiding the twins.”

  “In which case we’ll have to find her.” I declare, grateful as my father nods his head in agreement.

  “We’ll do whatever we have to do to find her, Liam. I promise you, I will aid your search in any way that I can.”

  “I know, and we’re so grateful to you for helping us. I may not say this to my wife, but I see how not having Pippa with her breaks her heart a bit more and more every day. She’s already missed so much precious time, she doesn’t want to miss more.”

  “I can only imagine the pain she feels. We will find her. All in time, my son. All in time. Now, I will be flying out in an hour to head to this auction.”

  “You will?”

  “Yes. I have a bone to pick with him. You will be on call while I’m away. Watch over everything here well. It’s a test for whenever I’m prepared to take a step back from the mafia.”

  “I won’t let you down.” I state, genuinely meaning it.

  He smirks, “I’d imagine no such thing from you, my boy.”

  Epilogue

  “Be brave enough to heal yourself even when it hurts.”

  ~ Bianca Sparacino

  Caprice

  6 months later . . .

  I never thought I’d want to look in a mirror ever again after what Sergei did, and for a while, I didn’t. To this day, I still have difficulty gaining the courage to do so. When he shoved the brand onto my skin, he took away one of the things I always felt lucky about— my beauty.

  I ended up confessing that exact statement to Liam when we were in therapy last week. He told me I was being ridiculous and I’m always beautiful. I simply rolled my eyes. Of course, he’d say something along those lines. He’s my husband and we just found out I’m six weeks pregnant. Since then, he’s made sure I’m not doing anything to get myself upset. So, I’m sure the man would agree with me even if I said the sky was purple.

  The trauma I experienced that day shaped me, molding me like I’m only a piece of clay. Looking back now I know I was fragile then, and to an extent I
still am, but I’m also no longer dependent on anyone. I know the value within my soul that comes with finding my inner strength. Therapy was one of the ways I ended up finding it, and I have to give a bit of credit to Cecilia, the Mackenzies’ private physician.

  Before Cecilia urged me to start going to therapy, I hadn’t even given it a thought. Through going to therapy my life has dramatically improved. I’ve even reached out to my best friend, Angelina, after not speaking to her for ages.

  Out of fear, I hadn’t communicated with her when Sergei found me in Maeve’s, terrified they’d go after her. Angelina is supposed to make a visit out in a couple of weeks so I can tell her the good news in person. She’s also thrilled to be meeting my husband, who I adore more than anything else on this planet. Anyway, on that day I was also told we could do some skin grafts to work on making me look a bit more normal so to speak.

  I went through two grafts. The first one did okay, but the second one didn’t do well at all. The surgeon told me originally that his hope was I’d have a small scar. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case. It’s pretty noticeable, though through the use of good makeup I’m able to cover it up most of the time. Well, makeup and my new bangs help quite a bit. Liam even loves them, saying they match my personality, whatever that means.

  Many would think I’m some sort of bohemian gypsy girl now, and in a way I am. I’m more full of life and grateful for things I never thought twice about prior to this experience.

  “You okay?” Liam asks, causing me to jump. I didn’t even hear our bedroom door open, then again I was stuck in my head.

  Turning, I face him. “Yeah, just getting ready to come downstairs. I should be asking if you’re okay though.” This is a big day for everyone in the Mackenzie family. For the first time in over twenty-something years, the twins are being reunited with their father and brother. Only, they aren’t coming alone. Instead, they’re bringing two men from the Mackenzies’ arch-nemesis.