Be Your Savior: The Be Yours Trilogy #2
Page 23
I nodded slowly, setting my hand on his stubbled cheek. He melted into my touch, his eyes sliding shut and a slow smile spread over his lips. “I’m always better when you’re here.”
Seth’s eyes opened and he grinned. “Best thing I could ever, ever hear.”
“So, are you—” I began to inquire when he was recording today, when there was a loud rap at the door. Groaning, Seth carefully climbed off of me and slid out of bed, pausing to peck my cheek before finding a pair of his jeans and a white t-shirt from the suitcase on the dresser, and he put them on as he walked through the room. A female voice murmured from the other side of the door, I could hear from here that it sounded a bit like Caia. What the hell is she doing here in the morning? Narrowing my eyes, I climbed out of bed myself and found one of Seth’s shirts on the floor and slid it over my head. It came mid-thigh and hopefully it’d be enough to hide everything. If that nasty bitch was at the door, I was going to confront her.
Instead, I was surprised to see three clothing racks pulled in and a well-dressed man barking instructions at Caia and Seth.
“What is this?” I asked, confused, as the man began holding up various items of hanged clothing to Seth’s body.
“Wardrobe,” Caia simply responded. She eyed my slumpy attire in dismay and appeared to nod out of the doorway. “We have something for you too.”
“Me?” I asked, pressing a hand to my heart.
“It’s for the show tonight, Jessie. Apparently,” Seth said with a shrug. “I guess my ripped jeans and shit isn’t good enough.”
“Of course not. This isn’t some dirty dive bar, Mr. Archer,” Caia insisted with a slight roll of her eyes that made me want to stalk the distance between us and knock her on her ass, but the thought vanished when another rack of women’s clothing was rolled in by a woman who quickly walked over to me.
I pressed my hand over my mouth as she eyed me up and down carefully. “What size do you wear?”
“Umm…” I swallowed. “Ten, usually.”
Her nose turned up gently as if she were disgusted, but she didn’t comment as she began to reach for several dresses. My eyes widened when I saw the labels—like Gucci and Givenchy—but my mouth really dropped seeing the Manolo Blahnik shoes along the bottom. “Holy crap…” I muttered. I really didn’t have a penchant for shoes, but I’d be lying if I wasn’t totally drooling over these. “Why do I need all this stuff?”
“If you’re going to be at the show, there’s a chance you’ll be photographed or something of the like if you’re with Mr. Archer, so you’ll need to dress the part,” the man assisting Seth replied over his shoulder.
“Miles has a reputation to uphold,” Caia insisted, and I caught Seth’s eye and we both fought grins. Yeah, he had a reputation all right, but I didn’t think all the fancy designer clothes could do anything to improve that.
“I see,” was all I responded.
“And I didn’t think you’d have anything appropriate,” Caia finished, giving me a sour face. I glowered intently towards her, but she ignored me.
“Try these on.” The man thrust a pair of leather pants and a gray button up shirt at Seth, and he carefully took them, moving for the bathroom.
“Um, you can change here. These are three-thousand dollars, I’d rather not let them out of my sight,” the man replied with a flippant gesture. Seth paused reluctantly, and the man rolled his eyes and turned around.
“Leather pants?” I said with a smirk. Seth slipped out of his jeans and slid the pants on, I swallowed thickly. They hugged his slim frame beautifully and enhanced his ass so well I wanted to reach out and grab it. They were quite low and revealed the faint “v” of his pelvis. Suddenly, I was incredibly nervous. He was going to be on stage—wearing that? If women went insane for him wearing his holey jeans and tanks, what would they do with him wearing that?
I didn’t have time to protest as a charcoal gray dress was thrust at me. It was fairly simple, with a deep V-neck and off the shoulder cap sleeves, and I was thankful for the strapless bra I had thought to bring.
“This should look good on you,” the woman attending to me said, holding up a pair of shoes, a pair of strappy pink sandals with a stiletto heel. I almost drooled, they were stunning, and expensive. “Like these?”
I nodded vigorously, catching Seth’s smirk. I feigned a scowl at him and he chuckled, amused. The shoes were set down, and I was instructed to slide my feet in. I did as instructed and smiled as they fit like a glove. I guessed that big money meant your clothes actually fit.
“These should be good.” I wasn’t asked to try on the dress—I knew it’d fit because it was sort of stretchy, it seemed, and the woman nodded towards the man. Seth had changed back into his clothing and the racks were whisked away.
“We’ll be back before the show, at around eight or so,” Caia said, and turned on her heels, following the two wardrobe assistants out the door.
Seth stood there and let out a low whistle. “Wow…”
“Just imagine, you’ll be getting this five-star treatment here all the time, soon,” I said with a hesitant smile. The thought made me nervous, actually. Very nervous. Suddenly, I realized how much I had to drink last night, and my forehead began to pound and I groaned.
“This is just…weird. I don’t want this, Jessie, I promise,” Seth insisted, closing the distance between us and taking me in his arms. “If it means leaving you behind, it’ll never happen.”
“Seth…” I said, frowning. “You can’t give up a dream for me.”
“No.” He slid both hands under my chin and firmly brought my gaze upward. “All I ever wanted to do with the music was be able to live off of it. This? Just icing. You are my dream, Jessie-love. You, and our future family. That’s all I ever wanted that I never thought I could have. Okay?”
My heart swelled at his declaration and my lips formed an easy smile. “But, you—” I began to protest, but he stopped me by ignoring my morning-breath rule and crashing his mouth against mine, urging my lips apart with his tongue and plunging in until I moaned gently into his mouth.
I was dizzy when he took a step back, and I grinned lazily up at him, setting my hand on his stomach. “You don’t have to give this up, though, if this is what you want. Miles said it, you could be huge. I’ll follow you if I have to.”
Seth brushed his fingers over my cheek. “I know you would. But you don’t have to. This is… fun. It’s a blast, really, but I also couldn’t leave the guys behind. You don’t ditch your family, you know?”
I nodded slowly in understanding, cupping my hand over his. “I do know. You are perhaps the greatest guy in the whole world, you know that?”
A blush spread over his face. “I am not. I just…this all makes me feel a bit weird.”
“Well.” I placed my hand on his hip and pressed myself against him. He shuddered mildly as my back arched, and I carefully rubbed over his constrained cock that was already growing rock-hard. “I mean it when I say if this is what you want, and it happens for you… you don’t have to say no.” I forced what I hoped was a genuine smile as I lowered my hand over him and palmed the hard length trapped in his jeans. And before I could say otherwise, I allowed him to take me back to bed and bury himself inside me while he declared his love for me, over and over between throaty groans and panting breaths. I just hoped that once he got a real taste of the limelight he’d always come back to me.
Remembering those girls’ conversations yesterday, I knew that if he did make it? It was going to be a hard road indeed, and I was nervous about it.
No, I was terrified.
I couldn’t compete with this fancy lifestyle. I know Seth said he didn’t want it… but he deserved it. He deserved the expensive Fender guitar Miles gave him without even thinking about the cost; it was much better than the off-brand I bought him and was hiding at Shane’s. I’d even had it inscribed with his initials, and it was lime green like our vehicles. It was nowhere near the cost of the other one.
&
nbsp; I watched him beam entering that studio, and even though he tried to pretend he wasn’t impressed—he was.
While we showered together and got ready for the day—me, back off alone to the spa, and him off to the studio—I wondered if this was what it was going to be like? Him, being whisked away for something important and me left behind with my writer’s block and failure.
Would he leave me behind? Were those girls right, and he deserved so much better than me? Maybe someone young and perky who had years ahead of her, who wasn’t ready to expire. He could have the time he really needed to get ready for babies and kids instead of choking back his fear to appease me.
“Jessie?” He asked, concerned, while the spray poured down over us and camouflaged the single tear that had started to fall down my cheek. He pushed the hair off my shoulder and stroked it down my back, leaning in the bend of my neck to lap up the water droplets that fell there, and I sighed, blissfully, melting into him. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I replied, taking a breath. “Just proud of you.”
He flinched gently, surprised. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m so glad you’re here to share it with me…” he said, burying his face in the crook of my neck and wrapping himself around me. I willed my heart to stop pounding and my breath to remain normal when I thought:
Just how long would I be able to share it with him until I just wasn’t enough?
26
Seth
Oh my god…this was really, really happening.
The crowd at the Milwaukee Auditorium was thunderous for Miles and Oblivion Orange Zero, and we were backstage, waiting for me to be introduced.
I was actually going to be introduced at a professional concert. This was…insane. The guys didn’t even know I was doing this unless Jessie told them.
Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think for even a brief moment that this would be possible: me, on a stage in front of a packed stadium of thousands, singing with a Grammy-award winning band. I was even so uncomfortable in these leather pants that I was forgetting to be nervous.
“You are so damned sexy, you know that?” I felt Jessie slide her arms over my waist and her body pressed against my back.
I glanced at her over my shoulder, overwhelmed for what was like the hundredth time tonight. She looked amazing in that gray dress and pink shoes. She didn’t need the hair or makeup job they did on her, but she looked amazing anyway because she grinned from ear to ear. Especially when she was told she could keep the dress and shoes—I thought she was going explode with giddiness. Jessie wasn’t really into fashion, but she promised me that “Givenchy” and “Manolo Blahnik” were prestigious, and she was psyched to be wearing them.
“You aren’t so bad yourself, beautiful,” I replied, carefully kissing the top of her head so I didn’t mess up the elaborate style that’d been created, and I felt her chest vibrate with a happy hum when I complimented her.
“Five minutes, Mr. Archer,” a stagehand behind me uttered, and I nodded in acknowledgement. The backstage was a flurry of activity, and I barely noticed who said it because they were fast to disappear.
Miles’ shows spared no expense, not surprisingly. Being a rock band there weren’t a ton of dancers or extras, but a lot of lasers and confetti and pyrotechnics depending upon the song, and the crowd ate it up.
“You all right?” Jessie questioned. I hadn’t noticed, but I had actually tensed up and my neck had heated. I guessed I was more nervous than I thought. With all the recording we’d done today, I didn’t think much about the show until we’d gotten here. Now that it was close…
“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” I replied, forcing a grin. Jessie didn’t look convinced, but I distracted her by gently kicking at her shoe with the toe of my black boot. “These are some shoes, really.”
She beamed excitedly. “I know! I can’t believe I actually own a pair of these. Victoria is going to fall over when she sees them!”
My chest tightened at her exuberance. I wished I could put that excited happiness on her face all the time. Perhaps, I could… if I could keep this going.
I know I said I didn’t want to be big, and I didn’t. But if I could do this a few times? I could give her things like this all the time. I knew she didn’t really care either way about material things like that—except for her car—but she deserved to have a little something here and there. I loved how giddy she was over the shoes, and how emotional she’d gotten over the ring I gave her.
And, I admitted it; I enjoyed giving her nice things. What guy didn’t want to shower his woman with all the best things he could? Especially when she didn’t require it? Neither of us came from much, it was nice to be able to change some of that.
“Baby?” She asked again, concern narrowing her green eyes as she set her hands on my stomach.
I smiled at her. “Oh yeah, I’m totally fine.” And as long as I pictured that bright grin on her face just now, I knew I would be, no matter how terrifying all the people were or how noisy it was or how bright all the lights were. Or how intimidating it was being here with a Grammy-winning band.
The song played its ending bars, and the crowd erupted into cheers. I sucked in a deep breath, knowing that it was go time. This was it.
“They’re ready for you, Mr. Archer,” the stagehand said to me again, this time he stayed put. My heart thudded in my chest, and suddenly, I gripped for Jessie’s hand and squeezed tightly, my thumb rubbing over the diamond on her finger for reassurance. Things began to spin, and her fingers tightened, almost to the point of pain, and my thoughts turned clear again. She quirked a brow at me, knowing fully well what she was doing. Pain from cutting helped level my mind…the pain she did from squeezing also helped. Smart.
“I’ll be fine,” I replied thankfully.
“Hey Milwaukee, I’ve got a special treat for you tonight! Many of you know I’m working on a solo album, right?” Miles spoke in the microphone, and the crowd cheered. Clearly, they knew. “And you know I’ve been taking up and coming artists from around the country to work with me. I’d love to pay forward the success that was given to me. This next guy is a local favorite, him and his band ‘Night Addiction.’” I was shocked when the audience grew louder. Jessie nudged me and grinned; they knew who we were, clearly.
“Apparently, you’ve heard of them,” Miles said with a laugh into the mic, and the crowd tittered with a rumble of laughter. “Well, one of their favorite songs of mine is a newer one called ‘The Darkest Day’, and I have the song writer and lead singer of Night Addiction, Seth Archer, here with me tonight!”
My ears nearly bled at the thunderous applause, and Miles turned and faced me, waving his hand towards me. And everything around me started to blur. Holy shit…
“Hey babe—you got this. Just think you’re back at the Lagoona, and the only one there is me. Okay?” She tugged at the back of my neck, urging me towards her, and she placed a quick but sweet kiss on my mouth and winked at me. “I love you. You’re the best and you’ll be great. Okay?”
I nodded once and gave her a grateful smile.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome, for the first time to the Milwaukee Auditorium, Seth Archer!”
One foot in front of the other Seth… you can do it. Taking a deep breath, I attempted to compose myself against the boisterous, thundering noise of the massive crowd of people, and blinding bright stage lights. I plastered a smile on my face and immediately found something to fixate on at the back of the auditorium—an exit sign actually—and ignored the chaos and the crowd. And it was a lot of people when I emerged and took the center stage, right next to Miles fucking Madison.
Cameras flashed from the seats, and I swallowed thickly. Miles gave me a strange look but clapped me on the shoulder in solidarity. “You got this, man…” he whispered, quietly enough so the mic wouldn’t pick him up.
I glanced back over my shoulder at Jessie, still waiting for me backstage. She gave a little wave and a g
rin, and I nodded.
Someone gave me a guitar—one of the band members, I assumed—and I put it over my neck, concentrating on the way the strap felt against the skin of my neck. I pulled a pick out of my pocket and strummed it singly over the strings, and I forced myself to look into the audience, feeling suddenly woozy.
“Seth, damn, thanks for being here tonight. You know we’ve been working together on two new songs for my new solo album, and let me tell you guys, they’re amazing. This dude is the real deal, I swear,” Miles praised, patting me between the shoulders, and I felt myself blush.
“Thanks,” I replied, surprised to hear my voice so loudly echo over the speakers.
“So, can you tell us about ‘The Darkest Day’ and what it’s about? Or are we just going to sing the shit out of it, huh?” Miles asked, and he grinned. I managed a smirk, and he stepped aside to give me access to the mic. This is just like back home… nothing new, I encouraged myself. I can do this… just open your mouth and speak.
“Well, yeah. ‘The Darkest Day’ is about a really bad day—obviously—that I had, and about how someone wonderful pulled me back from that ledge before the worst happened.” I informed, my gaze tracking over towards Jessie backstage. Her fingers were pressed over her lips, and her eyes glistened with tears. She looked so amazingly…proud. And that was all the encouragement I needed.
The crowd murmured affirmations, and I grinned out at them, feeling the adrenaline start to rush through me. “Hopefully, you all like it.”
“Oh they will. Here we go, everyone—‘The Darkest Day’ by Night Addiction and Seth Archer.” Miles nudged me. Tugging my lip-ring in my teeth, I focused on the little shoot of pain it gave me and breathed in. I closed my eyes briefly and forced myself to begin the opening notes to the song, and everyone else joined in. I was told to just sing it like normal, and Miles would add his own variant to it.