The Gritty Truth

by Melissa Foster

  Without a word, she went back to weaving the dough. She remained silent until she was almost finished with both pies, and then, speaking softly, she said, “Physical therapy was so hard, Quincy. It really took a toll on me. I fought with everything I had to regain my mobility and flexibility. But it was like swimming against the current. I’d make strides, then fall back because it hurt too badly to keep going.” Her voice escalated angrily, but it was not loud. “I struggled with depression, which was so foreign to me, I swear it took everything I had just to keep my head above water. I thought I’d never dance again, and that terrified me, because without dance, I had no idea who I would be.”

  “That’s understandable. Every time I thought about getting clean, I was terrified about who I’d be without drugs. But after I blew off Bear, I had no one to take the other side of the rope, no light at the end of the beast-infested tunnel to remind me why the fight was worth it.”

  She put the pies in the oven, avoiding his gaze as she set the timer.

  “But you, babe,” he said, taking her in his arms again, making her see him. “You’ve thrived. You have the world at your fingertips, and you’re not alone. You have the support of me and all our friends, of Elisa, Angela, and all those little girls who look up to you as their guiding light. I wish you’d give it a shot and not put those dreams you worked so hard for away for good.”

  “It’s not that easy. Dance has always been my guiding light, my stronghold,” she said, using the same words he used to describe Truman. “It’s always been something that has consistently made me happy, and the thought of being humiliated onstage will absolutely ruin that for me. I know myself, Quincy. Once that happens, I’ll never get that joy of dancing back. But right now I have it, even if I’m only dancing for myself between classes or after work, and I’m okay with keeping dance for myself and teaching. I don’t get anxious when I teach, but every time I even think about getting up onstage, I fill with anxiety that my leg will give out or my foot or hip will hurt.”

  “That’s how you felt around me, remember? You were okay texting, but you were nervous with me in person.”

  She nodded, smiling.

  “And look how good we are together. You’re human, babe. If you get up onstage and your hip or foot hurts, the people watching you—”

  “Will pity me,” she said strongly. “And I don’t want that.”

  “Like hell they will. Trust me on this, beautiful. They’ll be so enthralled by what you’re doing. You’re the only one who will notice your flaws. You’re the expert, a perfectionist, but the rest of us are thrilled just to be given the chance to see you dance.”

  She traced a sunflower on his chest and said, “But what if I can’t finish a performance?”

  “Then you’ll get your applause early.”

  “You make it sound easy,” she said with a smile.

  “Not easy, babe, just realistic. Do you think Elisa or Angela is going to be critical of your dancing? Or Kennedy or Dottie? All of them are going to cheer on Miss Woni.”

  She laughed.

  “I’m serious, Roni. I get that you don’t want to be humiliated. Nobody does. And the last thing I want for you is to have the joy of dance stolen away. But I don’t think you’ve given yourself a fair shot. Maybe you can start small, do a private dance for me.”

  She blinked at him, her lips curving playfully. “Like a striptease?”

  “Hell yes, but only in addition to the real dancing you do. I show up early just so I can watch you dancing. When you’re telling the story of the song through dance, it’s mesmerizing. I can’t look away.”

  “But I’m your girlfriend, so you see it through different eyes than everyone else.”

  “Maybe, but if other people see even half of what I see, they’ll be blown away, too.” He tucked her hair behind her ear so he could see her face better and said, “Baby, you are too magnificent to let fear lead you. I wish you could see yourself the way others do, the way it sounds like you used to. I want to support you the way you support me, and if that means letting this go, I will. But tell me, Roni. Is that really what you want? Never to dance on a stage again?”

  She lowered her eyes so fast he knew she hadn’t given up on her dream.

  “That’s what I thought.” He kissed her forehead, bringing her eyes back to his, and said, “I would give anything to see you onstage if and when you’re ready, and that hope comes with an offer of a full-body rub before and after the performance.”

  She slid her finger into the waist of his sweatpants and kissed his chest. “You’d give anything?” She ran her fingers over his pecs and said, “There’s a reason I didn’t give you a shirt to put on this morning.”

  “Anything.” God, she owned him. She knew just how to distract him from the conversation.

  A seductive smile played at her lips as she traced the tattoos on his arm, her eyes following her fingers along his forearm. “I really liked that thing you did the other morning when we made love in the shower.”

  Instant. Hard-on.

  He pulled her against him so she could feel what she was doing to him and said, “That thing with my mouth, or when I picked you up and took you against the wall?”

  Her eyes blazed up to his. “Both.”

  “Christ, baby,” he growled, and captured her mouth, lifting her into his arms. She wound her legs around his waist, and he carried her toward the bedroom, tearing his mouth away only long enough to say, “Does this mean you’ll think about the showcase?”

  “That’ll cost you two orgasms.”

  He scoffed. “What am I, lazy? We’re going for four.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  DIXIE AND JACE’S house was just like their family, or maybe like a mug of hot chocolate on a cold winter’s day—big, warm, inviting, and at the moment, filled to the brim. Quincy hadn’t been kidding about everyone being there. Roni had never been in a house filled with so many people or so much love. When she and Quincy had arrived, they’d been passed from one embrace to the next and greeted with unexpected excitement, which was wonderful. The children had cheered, and Lincoln had toddled over yelling, Boofulhere! causing uproarious laughter. The kids had dragged Quincy off to play by the enormous Christmas tree. Even though the girls had been good to Roni since they’d met, and she’d gotten closer to Penny, and Josie had even texted a few times just to chat, Roni had still been a little nervous about feeling like an outsider since Thanksgiving was such a family-oriented holiday. But Red and the girls had swept her into their circle. Jed and Crystal’s mother, Pamela, an upbeat blonde, had chatted Roni up about the pies she and Quincy had made, and Roni had given her the recipe. She and the girls had gabbed about their relationships and Josie and Jed’s upcoming wedding. Now they were tossing out names for Finlay and Bullet’s baby.

  “Bullet calls you Lollipop, so how about Cake Pop?” Penny teased, earning a scowl from Finlay and laughs from everyone else.

  “I think if it’s a girl, she should have a feminine name, like you and Penny do,” Gemma said. “Maybe Tiffany or Elizabeth?”

  “Those get my vote,” Pamela said. “Or even something old-school, like Margorie or even Melody.”

  “I like both of those. How about a unisex name like Jordan or Parker?” Josie asked.

  “I love unisex names, but Bullet doesn’t,” Finlay said. “We were talking about baby names while he was putting together the bassinette that Sarah and Bones gave us at the baby shower, and I suggested the name Charley for a girl or boy, and he said”—she lowered her voice an octave—“our little sweetheart is not growing up with a dude’s name.”

  “That’s my boy for ya,” Red said with a chuckle.

  “You could go with Trigger if it’s a boy,” Crystal chimed in. “That ought to check his manly name box.”

  “My baby is not being named after part of a gun.” Finlay rubbed her belly and said, “It fits my husband well, but this is an innocent baby. I’d like to honor you or Biggs, Red. What’s Biggs’s real
name?”

  “Biggs’s given name is Byron, but, honey, you honor us every day by being good to our son,” Red said compassionately. “You should name this baby whatever name speaks to you and Bullet.”

  “Don’t name him Byron,” Dixie said. “That’s an awful name. He’ll get teased. Why do you think my dad goes by Biggs?”

  Finlay put a hand on her hip and said, “Have you met my husband? I could name our son Jezebel and nobody would tease him,” causing more laughter.

  “Whatever you do, Fin, don’t name him after some type of fuel,” Tracey said, eyeing Diesel, who had been watching her as closely as the other guys were watching the kids. “I need a glass of water. I’ll be right back.”

  As they discussed names, Roni stole a glance at Quincy, down on all fours with Hail and Bradley riding on his back. Jed, Truman, and Bones were talking by the enormous Christmas tree, watching the kids like hawks as Kennedy directed Lincoln to crawl under Quincy’s stomach and told Hail to say giddyap. Lila crouched in front of Quincy in her adorable frilly dress, peering at his face, and he reached over to tickle her with one hand. She toddled away squealing and giggling, plastering herself against Scott’s legs. Scott hoisted his giggling niece onto his shoulders. Quincy glanced at Roni, grinning like he was having the time of his life. It was a sight Roni knew she’d never forget, and one she wanted to see for years to come.

  “Uh-oh, you guys, look.” Josie pointed to Diesel hulking over Tracey in the kitchen as she filled a glass with water from the dispenser on the refrigerator door. Like most of the men, Diesel was wearing a black leather vest with Dark Knights patches, which made him look extra intimidating.

  “He’s six foot six and she’s what? Five two maybe? Can you imagine those two in bed?” Crystal laughed. “Talk about riding a bronco.”

  “By the look on Diesel’s face, I’d say that’s exactly what Diesel is imagining right now,” Dixie said.

  Gemma and Penny agreed. Red just shook her head.

  “Girl talk sure has changed,” Pamela said, sharing a knowing glance with Red.

  “I don’t understand how Tracey doesn’t realize he likes her,” Sarah said. “Unless we’re wrong about that.”

  Dixie crossed her arms and said, “We’re not wrong.”

  “I think Tracey does realize it, even if she can’t admit it to herself yet,” Penny said. “The way he’s looking at her makes it hard to miss.”

  Just like yours and Scott’s furtive glances, Roni mused.

  Finlay rubbed her burgeoning belly and said, “That must be what Bullet and I looked like to you guys at first.”

  Tracey turned around, clutching her glass in both hands, her back pressed against the refrigerator, eyes wide as saucers as Diesel said something Roni couldn’t hear. “Shouldn’t we help her out of that situation?”

  “Tracey might look scared, honey, but she’s not,” Red said emphatically. “Our girl can hold her own with him, the same way Finlay did with Bullet. Diesel’s rougher than our Bullet, but he’d never hurt a woman. He’s a protector through and through.”

  Tracey scurried out of the kitchen, heading directly for the girls with a scowl on her face, and squeezed between Red and Roni. Roni glanced at Diesel, who wore a satisfied smirk. When he noticed Roni looking at him, his face went stoic again.

  “What was that about?” Penny asked.

  “I don’t know. He’s so weird,” Tracey said. “He asked me if I had a date for Josie’s wedding, and when I said how could I possibly have a date when he doesn’t let guys speak to me, he just stood there staring at me.”

  “Visually devouring would be more accurate,” Dixie said.

  “She’s right. He was looking at you like that,” Roni agreed. “Did he want you to go with him to the wedding?”

  “Of course not,” Tracey insisted. “But I think I finally understand why he’s always watching me. Red, you told him about my abusive ex-boyfriend when I started working there, didn’t you?”

  “Yes, I did, and I told him to keep an eye out, so you didn’t run into any trouble,” Red said.

  “See? That’s exactly what he’s doing,” Tracey said. “I think he wanted to make sure he had time to check out my date, as if I even want one. I’m going to have to yank his chain so he backs off, like you do with aggressive dogs. Does anyone have one of those collars with spikes inside it?”

  Red laughed. “I told you she could handle herself with him. Tracey and I have talked at length about our mountain of a man, and she wants to deal with him on her own.”

  “Exactly,” Tracey said.

  “Believe me, if I thought any man posed a threat to any of our girls, I’d be the first to step in.” Red looked at Roni and said, “That includes you, sweetheart. You’re family now.”

  Surprised, Roni said, “Thank you. I’ve never been around a family like yours. It’s amazing how you all take care of each other.”

  “It’s special, isn’t it?” Tracey said. “I had no idea it could be like this until they brought me into their clan.”

  Pamela and Crystal exchanged a warm glance.

  “Neither did I. It was overwhelming for me at first,” Sarah admitted. “But then I learned to trust, and that led to accepting that this is what family is supposed to be about.”

  “That’s right, honey,” Red said. “And, Roni, that charming man of yours is our boy, and he will always be an important part of our family. He’s not alone in his recovery or any other part of his life. He slipped through the cracks once, but never again.”

  Roni loved hearing that, though she knew it from the way they treated him. Before she could respond, Crystal said, “What are the guys powwowing about?” She pointed to Bullet, Bear, and Jace, who was holding baby Axel.

  “Knowing Bullet, he’s figuring out how to lock Finlay away for the rest of her pregnancy,” Dixie teased.

  Finlay giggled. “He loves so hard. He’s going to be the best daddy.”

  “Have you seen Bear with Axel?” Crystal asked. “He jumps at the chance to change diapers, bathe him, and play with him.”

  “Bear’s good with Axel, but he’s got nothing on three-times-daddy, Bones,” Sarah pointed out.

  “Speaking of kids,” Tracey said to Roni. “Your boyfriend sure loves them.” She nodded in Quincy’s direction. He was talking with Scott and Truman, holding Kennedy and Lincoln under his arms like footballs, their legs kicking as they giggled up a storm, while Hail and Bradley ran in circles around the three men.

  “He’s so good with them.” Roni looked at Gemma and said, “We had a blast on our date with Kennedy and Lincoln.”

  “They did, too.” Gemma smiled and said, “Lincoln can’t stop talking about Booful, and Kennedy is already planning your next date with them.”

  All the girls commented about Lincoln’s cute nickname for Roni.

  It was funny how the same nickname could make her feel special in two totally different ways. She glanced at Quincy again as he put the kids down and scooped up Lila, kissed her cheek, then set her down to play with the other kids. His eyes turned serious as he talked with Scott and Truman. Then his gaze shifted to Roni, his expression softening. She loved that she seemed to be on his mind as often as he was on hers.

  “That was an excessively dreamy sigh, Roni,” Finlay said.

  Roni realized she was staring at Quincy and tore her eyes away, only to find all eyes on her. “Sorry. He’s just so…”

  “Hot?” Tracey suggested.

  “Yes, definitely, but he’s more than that. There’s something about him and the way he cares about others. I can hardly believe that in less than a week we’ll have been dating for only a month. It feels like we’ve been together for much longer.”

  “That’s because he charmed you via text all summer,” Penny said.

  “He sure did,” she said.

  “He can be pushy, but he means well,” Penny said.

  “He doesn’t push, but he definitely nudges,” Roni said. “He makes me want to do t
hings I didn’t even realize I wanted to do.”

  “Quincy and his dirty deeds,” Crystal teased.

  “Not that kind of pushing. I mean, maybe that, too, but…” Roni felt her cheeks burn.

  “They do send videos to each other all the time,” Josie pointed out. “Jed said Quincy stops whatever he’s doing to watch your videos.”

  “This just got a lot more interesting,” Dixie said.

  “Not those kinds of videos,” Roni insisted. “We use video messages instead of texting. It’s more personal. Anyway, what I meant was, he sees more in me than I let myself see anymore.”

  “What do you mean, anymore?” Josie asked.

  Roni hadn’t realized she’d never told them about her accident. She filled them in on what she’d gone through and said, “Quincy’s trying to get me to perform again. On the one hand, I’m really nervous about it. But on the other hand, a big part of me wants to do it for him, which feels weird because I’ve never wanted to dance for someone else. I wanted to make my grandmother and Elisa—my dance instructor—proud, but dancing has always been something I’ve done for myself.”

  “That’s how you know you’ve found your person,” Red said. “The one who will help you become the best you can be and would walk through fire for you.”

  Roni thought about that for a second and said, “I think he would walk through fire for me, and for all of you, too. He’s that good a man.”

  “And your person comes with all of us,” Gemma said cheerily.

  “Speaking of us, did Gemma talk to you about the costumes for the Winter Showcase?” Crystal asked.

  “No. Is there a problem?” Roni asked. “We had some issues with ill-fitting costumes for the Summer Showcase, but Elisa worked that out with the costume company, and I thought she sent home a note to parents not to order until four weeks prior to the event.”

  “I haven’t ordered Kennedy’s yet,” Gemma reassured her. “I hadn’t said anything about this to you because you’re seeing Quincy, and I didn’t want you to think we were trying to use your relationship to our benefit, but when I was looking through the company’s website, I realized that Crystal and I could make the costumes much cheaper. We can get the materials in bulk through the boutique and save the families quite a bit of money.”