Unawakened

by R. J. Blain

  “You’re asking a lot,” I grumbled.

  “You’re the only one I have in a position to get what I need from him.”

  I frowned, leaning back and stretching my arms along the back of the couch, positioning myself so Kenneth got a good look at my Beretta. “Likely true. What do you need me to find out?”

  “First, I want you to discover what he was having Terry Moore do with my drugs. The earliest invoices were dated a week after I supplied him. Seems like too much of a coincidence to me.”

  “I see. I guess I need to know what the drugs do. You gave me a brief summary of the effects. They can’t be detected on the current tests. They’re mild. But what do they actually do?”

  Kenneth smiled, but there was nothing friendly about his expression.

  I tensed, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw something dark coming towards me. I whipped my hand to my gun, but Kenneth’s dae was faster. He caught my wrist, yanked my arm back, and before I could even scream, he jabbed a needle into my arm.

  Kenneth had moved while I was distracted by his dae. He clamped his hand over my mouth to keep me quiet. I thrashed, but the two didn’t release me until Kenneth’s dae pulled the needle out and tossed the syringe on the coffee table.

  A few smears of red lingered in the barrel, and I trembled, remembering what the drugs had done to Terry Moore’s victims.

  “I don’t know exactly what they do. That’s not my problem, Miss Daegberht. It is, however, now yours. I expect a full report when it wears off. Don’t worry. Jacob will take you home so you don’t have any unfortunate mishaps on the way. I’ve been told by reputable sources it takes about twenty minutes to kick in, no matter how it’s taken.”

  Kenneth pulled his hand away from my mouth, and I realized he was wearing gloves. I shuddered.

  Had Rob told them about my allergy? To cover my growing fear, I snapped my teeth together and sat straighter. “You son of a bitch.” I rubbed where I had been stabbed with the needle. Kenneth’s dae had also been wearing gloves.

  At least I wouldn’t have to deal with an allergic reaction in addition to being drugged.

  “You should be happy, Miss Daegberht. This is the good stuff, the stuff you couldn’t afford even if you wanted it. You’ll finally have the perfect high you’ve been searching for all this time. Don’t think I hadn’t noticed you wanting another hit, no matter how good a job you did fighting it.”

  One day, Kenneth would fall at my hands, and I’d enjoy every moment of his ruination. I clacked my teeth together, debating if I could take out Kenneth or his dae before they killed me. I doubted it, so I said, “Give me a reason I shouldn’t kill you right now.”

  “You’ll die, for starters. You’d probably be dead before you could pull the trigger. Don’t kid yourself. You won’t do it. You only killed Lily because she always had what you wanted. Take her home, Jacob. No side trips. However appealing she might be to you, she’s off limits—for now.”

  I spat curses at him and reached for my gun. Kenneth’s dae grabbed my arm and hauled me to my feet. In spite of Kenneth’s estimate of twenty minutes, the drugs were doing something to me—something that made it difficult to resist the dae.

  “Oh, and another thing, Miss Daegberht. It should wear off in about twelve hours. If my understanding of the drug is correct, I recommend you stay home. Do try not to forget to write notes on the drug’s effects. It may be important for your research later. We can talk more about your job after you’ve recovered. Perhaps I’ll come visit you a little later tonight, once you’ve gotten accustomed to the drug.”

  There was so much I wanted to tell him, but my tongue refused to obey me. My arms and legs were no better. Kenneth’s dae dragged me towards the stairwell, and I stumbled along with him. By the time Jacob got me into Kenneth’s car, I could barely stay on my feet, let alone fight him. Had Rob set me up? If so, why?

  When the first tingling wave of the high hit, everything narrowed to the sensation of my clothes caressing my skin, the leather rubbing against me, and the pleasure of even the lightest touch.

  The initial surge of the drug’s influence subsided by the time Jacob dropped me off in front of my apartment, although my skin’s hypersensitivity to touch remained. The dae leered at me, leaving me with zero doubt of what he had in mind for me.

  I liked when Rob looked me over head to toe, but Jacob doing it sent chills through me. I scrambled out of the car, backed out of the dae’s reach, and slipped my hand into my coat for my Beretta.

  “You don’t want to do that, Miss Daegberht.”

  “Oh, I do,” I replied, although I didn’t pull out the weapon. “If he even thinks of backstabbing me again, I’ll start sending his hounds back to him in pieces, and I’ll take out his most useful ones first. Lily was just the start. No more tricks. If he really wants my help, he better get his head out of his ass, because right now, I’m not feeling very benevolent. I may decide Dean Lewis might be interested in knowing Kenneth Smith is gunning for him.”

  “You wouldn’t dare.”

  “I wouldn’t? Are you so sure about that? I would, Jacob. I would, and I wouldn’t even hesitate. He broke his trust with me. If he’s stupid enough to think I’m going to just accept his attempt to kill me was a part of the work, he’s mistaken. He can also expect a hefty bill for this… stunt.”

  Maybe the drug made all of my nerves sing, but once the initial surge of pleasure had faded, it hadn’t affected my ability to think. It didn’t smother my anger, either. I closed my fingers around my Beretta’s grip, wondering if I could get away with leaving another body lying around for someone to find.

  With the emergence of the dae, bodies were plentiful and few seemed to miss the dead. Given time, once friendships and lives were rebuilt, people would miss those who were gone, but the world was currently inhabited by the strange, who were also strangers. For all the dae often took on monstrous forms, they were still a lot like humans.

  They only cared for those with close ties to them, ties most hadn’t had time to form.

  “I’ll make certain he is aware of your opinion.”

  “My opinion is non-negotiable, Mr. Jacob. Perhaps this will wake him up to reality: I’m tired of being stepped on. If he even thinks of trying to ruin my schooling, remind him if I can go behind his back and get admittance into Bach studies, there’s a lot more I can do, too.” While some of my speech was bluffing, one important fact remained: I had leverage on Dean Lewis and Kenneth Smith, if I could figure out the best way to use it. “Ask him if he wants me on his side, or should I have a talk with Dean Lewis?”

  “Are you threatening him, Miss Daegberht?” the dae growled.

  “I don’t make threats, dae. I make promises. Remember, he backstabbed me first. If he hadn’t sabotaged my gear, he wouldn’t be in this position right now. Get the fuck out of my sight. You and your pathetic master sicken me.”

  I turned and stormed to my apartment building. If Jacob said anything, I didn’t hear him over the bang of me slamming the front door.

  2

  Would I ever be capable of trusting anyone?

  Rob was lounging on my couch when I stomped into my apartment. For a long moment, all I could do was stare at him, wondering if he had somehow been involved with Kenneth’s plan to pump me full of the red drug that had already caused me so many problems. Then, I checked his face for the red splotches I associated with the bug going around, relieved he showed no sign of illness.

  My relief didn’t last long, and my fear of ending up exactly like one of the girls from the murder videos warred with my doubt about Rob’s inclination to participate in such a scheme. Rob was ruthless enough to make other dae fear him, but he hadn’t broken his trust with me.

  Not yet at least.

  Damn it. Would I ever be capable of trusting anyone? Kenneth had done a good job of teaching me men couldn’t be trusted. Lily had done a better job of teaching me women couldn’t be trusted, and if I couldn’t trust Rob, who could I trust?r />
  Nobody, apparently.

  Well, maybe except for my macaroni and cheese casserole. I bet Colby could shine some light on the situation with its limited vocabulary.

  “You’re flustered.”

  Rob kept getting better at reading my emotions, especially the ones I didn’t want him to pick up on. In the months since Kenneth had tried to kill me, I had adapted to the reality that Rob could sense my strongest emotions. I’d even learned how to suppress the ones I really didn’t want him noticing.

  Sometimes, I even used his abilities against him. Maybe I had a hard time resisting him, but it was a two-way street, and as often as he turned the tables on me, I turned them back on him. While I remained a simple, plain unawakened human, I had some power over Rob, and I made certain he knew it.

  It was the only way to survive in a world filled with monsters who viewed me as a food source. Fortunately for us both, my method of establishing I had a horse in the same race resulted in an eventful and mutually satisfying romp in bed. Lifting my chin, I swallowed several times before saying, “I went to see Kenneth.”

  Rob tensed, and his eyes widened before narrowing. “I hadn’t meant for you to go alone.”

  It wasn’t an accusation; Rob’s tone deepened when he was truly angry.

  Before I had met him, failure for me had been equal to a death sentence. Things had changed, and while the words stuck in my throat and bitterness at my stupidity washed through me, I had the courage to say, “I shouldn’t have.”

  “Lesson learned.” With Rob’s two words, the matter was resolved—if I let the subject die. I wanted to, but of all the people and dae in the world, only Rob and Colby understood me.

  My fear of getting hooked on drugs again made me shake. After a lifetime of hiding the truth from everyone, being open and honest hurt. Until I knew what the drug did, I needed his help.

  “Something’s still bothering you.”

  His statement was an invitation, one I could ignore or accept without consequence. That, too, had been something I had learned while my head and ribs healed from my haphazard collision with the side of a skyscraper.

  He wanted me to learn I could trust him at my pace rather than his—and he understood I would take a long time about it.

  I figured my emotions provided him with all the cues he needed to figure out if he could trust me.

  “Kenneth and his dae drugged me.” My words emerged as a wavering whisper, and my shaking intensified. Every single fear from years of fighting my addictions resurrected and hammered away at me.

  I didn’t want the pleasuring tingle of my clothes brushing against my skin to remind me of the intensity of the craved high, but even standing still, I couldn’t avoid it.

  Rob was off the couch and in front of me in the time it took me to draw one shaky breath. He cupped my face in his hands, and the warmth of his touch partnered with the sensitivity of my skin made me tremble. “What did he drug you with?”

  The rumble of his words in his chest betrayed his fury and reassured me of his innocence.

  My concentration scattered at the way he brushed his fingers over my cheeks, his hands sliding down my throat to check my pulse. My heart raced, both from my fear of what Kenneth’s drug was doing to me and the sensation of Rob’s bare skin on mine.

  With Rob, I didn’t have to worry about my allergies. All I had to do was enjoy the warmth of his touch. I closed my eyes, struggling to catch my breath.

  “Alexa? What did he drug you with?”

  When I didn’t answer, Rob slipped an arm behind my back and propelled me in the direction of the couch. I sagged onto it, and the soft, worn cushions caressed me through my clothes.

  “Alexa!”

  I didn’t want to talk; I wanted to bask in the pleasure of the high, and I squirmed where I sat, my breath coming fast and shallow. The heat of desire spread through me, and a new fear grew.

  If Kenneth Smith came to pay me a visit with the drug still in my system, I doubted I’d say no to him no matter how much I loathed the idea of sleeping with him. I craved the sensuality of touch and the euphoria Rob never failed to give me.

  I’d be no different from the girls in Terry Moore’s videos, and after killing Lily, I had no doubt the outcome would be the same. I had taken Kenneth’s prized bitch away from him, leaving her cold body on his doorstep.

  “Talk to me, Alexa,” Rob demanded, and the anger in his tone dragged me out of my thoughts.

  My voice wavered when I said, “Terry Moore’s drugs. The red one. Said he didn’t know what it did, that I should find out for him.” A fear-born shiver raced through me. “Said he might come before it wore off. Twelve hours. I killed his favorite.”

  “I’m going to do far more than just kill him,” Rob snarled. Drawing a deep breath, he let it out in a long, slow exhale. “Colby!”

  My macaroni and cheese roommate oozed its way out of our bedroom and mumbled, “Mommy?”

  At least that was something I wouldn’t have to worry about.

  “Remember what we talked about last week?”

  When it wasn’t out and about, my cheesy roommate spent a great deal of its time in a comatose stupor as a result of gorging on apples, but Rob’s question spurred it back to life. “Mommy,” it snarled, hopping once in place.

  “I’ll take care of her. You go handle that business. We’ll make plans once you’re back.”

  Colby left. It never failed to amaze me how it managed to open and close the door without hands.

  Slumping beside me, Rob sighed and flexed his hands. “Okay. Let’s take it from the top. What happened?”

  As long as I sat still and Rob didn’t touch me, I could focus my thoughts. I closed my eyes, fighting the temptation to trail my fingers on Rob’s skin to discover if touching him felt as good as him touching me did. I told him about my dawn excursion to visit Kenneth Smith and the little he had told me before his dae had jabbed me with the needle.

  The hardest part was admitting what the drug was doing to me. I lacked the courage to confess how badly I wanted Rob to cover me with his body.

  Then again, I probably didn’t need to tell him. Thanks to what he was, he always knew. I found comfort in the fact he wanted me and wouldn’t take what he desired without my invitation.

  The drug did far more than make me sensitive to touch. It made me want the pleasure of skin on skin, and the longer I fought against it, the more painful it became. It began as a burn in my bones, one only the brush of clothes or touching something alleviated, although the relief from the discomfort didn’t last long.

  After more than an hour, I had no doubt Kenneth knew exactly what the drug would do to me and that he intended to take advantage of it. If Rob hadn’t returned home and Kenneth had come to my apartment, I would have given him exactly what he wanted just to escape the drug’s relentless discomfort.

  “Damn it,” Rob hissed, pacing around my apartment like a caged beast seeking a way out of its prison. “Having a counter for that wretched drug on hand was one of the few things I hadn’t thought I’d need. I’m sorry, Alexa. I should have known better.”

  The apology distracted me from the burning ache enough for me to watch him fidget. “I was stupid. I shouldn’t have gone alone.”

  “Now that you recognize your mistake, don’t do it again. I don’t blame you. You’re frustratingly independent, and I should have known better than to leave you alone with Colby for so long. I had business I had to attend to.”

  “My stupid fault for trusting Smith,” I countered, shaking my head.

  “This explains the videos far more than I like,” Rob admitted, balling his hands into fists before he forced his fingers to relax. “If this drug spreads to the general population, rapes will skyrocket, and the victims probably won’t even believe they were raped.”

  “They’ll like it,” I agreed, shuddering. I was liking it, which terrified me most of all. At the rate I was going, if I didn’t find real relief soon, I’d be desperate enough to a
ccept anything from anyone. “They’ll want more.”

  I already did. The years hadn’t separated me far enough from the bone-deep cravings of having the next hit, one even better than the last. It took all of my willpower to stay seated and still, fighting against my desire.

  “Alexa.”

  I made the mistake of turning my head, and my hair tickled against my throat. The featherlight touch sent a zap all the way down to my toes, and I sucked in a breath at the stimulation. “What if he comes here?” I whispered, terrified of what I would do, of what I’d say, and how I’d be powerless to resist.

  Rob stared at me for a long moment, his eyes narrowed. He smiled, and I held my breath at the way he looked me over from head to toe. “I’ll keep you too busy for him to even have half a chance of catching your attention.” He pushed back the sleeve of his suit to check his watch. “Ten and a half hours, assuming his twelve hour estimate is correct. I can probably call in a favor and make sure Mr. Smith stays away for the duration. Alternatively, I can drive him away should he happen to interrupt us. Which would you prefer?”

  Even without the drug influencing me, I would have been intrigued by Rob’s offer. Whenever he checked his watch with a leering smile, he had some new trick up his sleeve. Without fail, his tricks left us both satisfied.

  If Kenneth drugged me so he could have me as he wanted, robbing him of his desires would make my time with Rob all the sweeter.

  “And if we’re interrupted?” I asked, matching him stare for stare.

  “I’ll make sure I take a picture of his expression for you to enjoy for years to come.”

  I could live with that, and I told him so. His smile turned sensual, and he stalked towards me, leaving me with no doubt of his intention and desire.

  I welcomed him with open arms and a smile of my own.

  The interruption I feared came at midday, and I flinched at the knock on my door. Rob grumbled, rolled away from me, and paused long enough to kiss me.